Strolling Amongst Stalactites

BY : Blackkitten23
Category: Naruto > Het - Male/Female
Dragon prints: 57673
Disclaimer: i don't own Naruto and i don't make a profit off my stories

Last Time:

Danzo was pissed, but he started to tear up as he counted the zeros on the bill. As he frantically pondered over possible solutions to this mess a little blue spider carrying a tiny camera taped everything. The tape was for much more than a laugh, however.


Naruko smirked at the spider that landed on her shoulder, “Thank you, Nina.” She said politely as she took the little camera from the little spider and sealed it safely away in her arm.

“I was happy to! Is that going to your boyfriend? He seems nice!” Nina exclaimed as she took her spot on Naruko’s earlobe and pretended to be an earring.

The blonde blushed, “I don’t think he thinks-“

“Now Maki, don’t be shy!” Tina snickered from her spot on the blonde’s other ear. “Sure he’s a little naive, but he seems to like you!”

Naruko blushed as she pondered what her spider friends said, but then shook her distracting thoughts away, “First, let’s do our mission.” She whispered as someone came down the hall towards her. She smiled, “Morning, Manager Mick.” 

“Oh! Yes. Hi … did anyone clean room 105?” The nervous man asked.

“Yes, sir. Nothing seemed odd, but it looked like a tree branch or something brushed the window. It was very windy last night so it isn’t too surprising.” Naruko commented knowing full well that the guy was worried about the disappearance of the little red flag. “I was just about to go outside to check for any damages and get maintenance-“

“Don’t worry about that!” Mick exclaimed quickly. “I’ll handle all of that! Go continue with your other jobs.”

“Yes, sir!” Naruko said with a little bow before heading off. Instead of returning to her civilian job she went back to the room she shared with her team. When she opened the door she saw her two teammates looking at her expectantly. After she shut the door she unsealed the tiny camera and a realistic beetle. “We got it.”

“Perfect.” Sana said as took a tiny slip of paper and a pen out of an arm seal of her own and began writing in code. 

Naruko set the bug and camera down on the bed next in front of Sana and looked at the message, “Could you request sending a copy of the tape to Kimimaro?” She blushed when her very amused teammates looked at her. “What? He helped out and might find it funny … Danzo nearly cried.” She explained, but her logical reasons didn’t fool her teammates and she blushed even harder when they started snickering. What made it worse was the very last line of code that Sana jotted down. “Don’t write-“ 

Sana smirked and took the note, camera and bug out of her blonde teammate’s reach, “It’s going!” As she dodged Naruko’s attempts to catch her, Sana swiftly put the message and camera into the bug. Once Naruko lunged at her to get the bug, Sana pulled the blonde into a hug while casually flicking the bug to Haru. “Not happening!” She exclaimed and hugged Naruko so she couldn’t escape.

“It’s gone!” Haru giggled as she opened up the window and held the bug outside. 

Naruko pouted when a trained bird snatched the bug and let her face fall into Sana’s chest, “Meanie.” She mumbled into Sana’s chest.

“Yes I am! Now let’s throw Mick and his buddy in front of the metaphorical kunai.” She said cheerfully as she unsealed something and held up the lotion bottles that were full of money.


Elder Yumi looked away from the meeting that was currently going and at the messenger bird that landed on the perch that was built into the back of the queen’s chair, “It would be quite a coincidence if that’s from the resort team.”  She commented as the bird dropped the bug into Queen Reine’s open hand.

“Too coincidental.” Yobaba huffed as the queen opened the bug. “That would be far too fast for a young team.”

Queen Reine chuckled as she read the coded note. “The world is full of coincidences.” She said as she plugged the camera into a small slot on the edge of the table.

A screen on the wall immediately turned on and a series of movie clips started playing. The first clip seen was actually a short clip of Danzo and Orochimaru when they were near the bath. It seems that one one the tiny spiders risked getting a little video from Sana’s sleeve in order to prove that they crossed paths. 

The second thing on the camera was the audio for the conversation that Naruko, Sana and Haru overheard between the manager and the other person. It was followed up by a video of the courier climbing up to the window with a red flag. Even better was that the camera was up in a nearby tree and at the perfect angle to see Orochimaru killing the courier with a lamp.

“Death by hotel lamp … what a bright idea.” Yumi said with an amused smile making everyone snicker slightly and her fellow elder scoff.

The camera spider gently placed the camera on the branch it was on. The audience could see the little spider scuttle into the frame and leap onto the window sill when Kimimaro came into the room. The little spider seemed to want to make sure everything went smoothly without risking bringing the camera closer. When the audience saw a little red flag crumble and burn up, the spider went to get the camera again and Kimimaro left with the body.

Another clip showed a view from right outside Orochimaru’s hotel room. They could see the snake sage packing. They saw Kimimaro meet the snake sage and hand him a card. The camera moved and zoomed in as the eight legged camera spider made sure to get a look at the card. 

Finally they saw the last, and by far the funniest, clip, which was that of Danzo receiving his bill. The bandaged fool was nearly crying and desperately trying to settle the bill. After being denied the old warhawk actually tried a different means of handling the bill.

“It seems we have an opening.” Queen Reine said and with a simple wave of her hand all the other women at the table left save for the Queen herself and the two elders. “Gina.”

The bodyguard poked her head into the room with a cheerful smile, “Yes, my queen?”

“I was asked to send something. Would you mind sending it?” Queen Reine asked with a very amused smile as she hit a button on the table making a computer screen rise up.

Gina walked over to the Queen as she copied over a clip from some camera footage, “Of course, who should I send it to?”

Yobaba huffed, “I’d like to know what could possibly be so amusing, but also worth taking up your time.”

Instead of answering, the queen pushed the coded message that came with the camera to the middle of the table. As the queen copied over one clip of he footsteps and sent it into a slightly bigger fake bug, the others read the note. The translation went like this ...

‘Team Resort: Akatsuki courier is dead. Ran into Konoha Hawk, Snake and informant, Bone. Request by Fox: Send crying Danzo footage to Bone. Fox *heart* Bone!’

“Ahhh young love!” Yumi said with a smile.

Yobaba nodded in approval, “Good. They aren’t wasting your time.” She said sincerely. “Make sure to say it was Naruko’s idea … perhaps she should be allowed to keep in touch with him.” The elder suggested. As stern as the woman could be even she had a soft spot for love.

Queen Reine handed the giddy bodyguard the fake bug with the digital footage inside, “That might be a good idea.” 

“This’ll be fun!” Gina exclaimed as she ran off with the bug in hand.

“I’ll explain this new turn of events to Jade later tonight.” The queen commented before looking at her two loyal advisors. “Are you ready?”

Yumi smiled, “We already set up the first part so yes.”

“It will be fun to see Kakashi again.” Yobaba said with a devilish smirk before both Yumi and Yobaba left the room leaving the queen to herself.

After the queen was joined by her second bodyguard, Lulu, she stood up and walked through the streets of her beloved village. Once Gina rejoined them after sending the bug they stopped to get some lunch. However, they didn’t stop at any nearby place. Queen Reine went all the way to Jade's home and went inside.

“I take it the mission has begun.” Jade commented when she saw her queen enter her home.

Reine nodded and she kissed Jade, “Yes, it has. Naruko and her teammates will return once they make sure that sponsor can no longer send money to any groups.”

“Good.” Jade said, but noticed an especially playful smile on Gina’s lips. “Am I missing something?” She asked suspiciously.

“Nope! We’ll give you two some privacy!” Both of the bodyguards raced outside to continue their guarding of the queen from a distance.

“Ok? … what was that about?” Jade asked and looked at Reine who was laughing.

A few moments passed and the laughing slowly dissipated allowing the queen to actually speak clearly, “Do you remember why I kept our relationship quiet around the young children?” 

Jade chuckled, “Ignoring the fact that you hate people who blast their relationship crap for everyone to hear?” She asked teasingly, making Reine smirk. ‘You wanted people to slowly figure it out to test their skills.”

“Subtle but effective.” Reine said and looked Jade in the eyes. “For Naruko I also made a bigger point of hiding it. I didn’t want her growing up as the queen’s daughter. She’s yours and yours alone.” She said and pouted slightly when Jade raised an eyebrow in amusement. “Ok, yes. I didn’t want kids and I was too busy anyway ...still I got attached and … umm I’m considering offering Naruko a position to keep in touch with an informant.”

“That’s a big job and she doesn’t have a large amount of experience …” Jade’s eyes narrowed. “Why?”

Jade smiled, “Now don’t worry about the experience. She will be with someone and it’ll only be for a few months since-“

“Yes. Yes. The Konoha and Akatsuki mission. I don’t like it, but I get it.” Jade said dismissively before looking at her queen seriously. “Why are you giving Naruko the mission of keeping in touch with an informant?”

Queen Reine smiled cheekily, “Your baby is growing up.” She said and explained exactly what that meant.

Jade blinked, “Oooh … cute.” She commented. At first Jade really did seem ok with it, but once Naruko’s team returned a few days later and the blonde walked through the door her tune changed. Jade threw herself onto the blonde and hugged her tightly. “My baby is too young to leave me!” She cried.

“What? Mom?” A completely confused Naruko could only gape in shock as her mother clung to her. It wasn’t until she heard laughter from the bedroom and saw Queen Reine, who was dressed in a robe,  coming down the stairs that she got any hope of someone explaining this. “Queen-“ Naruko was cut off when her mother cried louder and hugged a bit too tight.

Reine rolled her eyes, “I knew you weren’t as calm as you seemed. I am surprised that you have enough energy to whine. I thought I tired you out.” She commented as she pried Naruko and Jade apart. “Behave, love.” She said and placed a kiss on Jade’s head.

Naruko blushed when she realized what her mother might be upset about, “Ummm is this about the message Sana sent during the mission. She was only joking-“

Oh?” Reine raised an eyebrow. “So if I offered a chance to be Kimimaro’s middle man you wouldn’t-“

“Really?!” The blonde exclaimed excitedly, but then blushed deeply knowing she was busted.

“My baby is growing up!” Jade wailed sadly,

The blonde’s eyes widened with worry, “It's ok, Mom! I’m not-“ she yelped as her mother latched onto her waist again. Not sure what else to do she shot a pleading look at Reine.

Reine sighed, “Let’s calm down and eat. Maybe some of us will feel better with a little chocolate in their system.” She said and pulled out some cookies for them to share. After eating Jade calmed down, though she still pouted when she listened to Reine explain what her position as Kimimaro’s middle man would entail.

“Now you aren’t the most experienced so you’ll be paired up with his current middle man, understand?” Reine said and the blonde nodded clearly excited about the chance. “With most informants it’s the basic routine.  Stay at the halfway point between Cave and wherever your informant is and act as an alert, medic and safety net for your informant. For Kimimaro it’ll be a little different because he is always on the move and Orochimaru is a big factor. You have to stay on your toes especially as it gets closer to the time that Orochimaru will want a new body, which is coming soon. We’re pulling him out the second it becomes too dangerous. Also you need to be ready for the other mission. Of course, your teammates will be ready to assist, but still be ready because you might be pulled off Kimimaro’s detail so you can help.”

Naruko grinned, “I understand!” She exclaimed and ran upstairs to get some things ready so she can leave immediately. 

“I don’t.” Jade pouted sulkily. “Can you put me on the Konoha or Akatsuki teams? I need to torture someone.”

“The queen chuckled, There’s plenty of people hooking them already, but you can help with the extraction.” 


Hiruzen Sarutobi clutched his heart in horror as his eyes skimmed the bill in front of him, “What is this?! How did so much damage to the outpost town happen?! And why was it charged to Konoha?!”

Danzo’s eye shifted slightly over the other council members before handing over some reports. “No idea, but these are some reports proving that it did happen.”

“Oh shit.” Hiruzen Sarutobi muttered as he skimmed the reports. “It’s really bad and they are so pissed that they don’t even want ninjas around!”

Koharu scoffed, “How are we supposed to ensure it is an accurate estimate without ninjas to help oversee the progress. If we don’t do that and the damages aren’t as bad as they claim then they basically took a lot of money!”

“I already thought of that when I saw the reports. Can we possibly send some cameras on some birds?” Danzo suggested.

Hiruzen glanced at the Aburame clan head, Shibi, and the Hyuga clan head, Hiashi, but sighed when he was met with a pair of glares, “I suppose we have no choice.” He muttered in defeat.

Of course, he was hoping that his own ninjas would step up and help. The bugs and byakugan would be perfect for this situation, but it was pretty clear that wasn’t going to happen. Unfortunately, all of the ninja clans were a bit pissed because of Naruko's ‘disappearance’, which was not being taken well. What made it worse is that he couldn’t tell them when she really vanished.

 After all, that was when Cloud kidnapped Hiashi’s daughter and Hiruzen didn’t want to explain why he killed civilians and hospitalized Kakashi to cover that up for so long. It was bad enough that they are pissed with him for not putting more effort into finding Naruko. If they knew the truth or who Naruko really was he’d be screwed.

“I can go get that started.” Danzo offered calmly.

Hiruzen nodded, “That’ll save us time. While you do that we need to discuss finding a sponsor.” He said sadly and Danzo left the room. He never realized that Danzo only made that offer so he had a chance to fake the camera footage and sneakily hide the fact that the bill was not for damages at an outpost town, but to cover his resort bill. “So does anyone have any ideas on sponsors? The missions aren’t completely taking us out of the red anymore.”

Tsume, the female clan head of the Inuzuka clan, scoffed, “Perhaps we’d be a little better off if you kept some sexist opinions quiet.”

“Yeah.” The Sarutobi groaned, knowing he will never live that down.

One of the civilian councilmen tentatively raised his hand trying to ignore the tension, “I think the people who bankrupt Gato and now own Wave are staying at my brother’s inn.”

Hiruzen’s eyes widened, “Are you sure about that?!” He knew that the billionaire recently lost everything after making a bad investment and the two old women, Yumi and Yobaba, turned Wave into a wealthy trading village. If those are the same women then they could easily help replace the funds that the Daimyo took from their budget.

“Considering how well you’ve done with the daimyo, I suggest you don’t meet these women.” Koharu said sharply, making Hiruzen sigh sadly.

The Councilman smiled, “umm … I have one thought. My brother said one of the ladies was hoping to meet Kakashi. Apparently, he unknowingly helped her on a mission and she hoped to meet him. He can tell us if they’re legit and hopefully get them to do business with us.”

“That’s perfect! Kakashi has been distracted lately for some reason, but he’s still more likable than you.” Koharu said shooting Hiruzen a smirk.

Hiruzen hung his head sadly, “Can you tell Kakashi to come here? Tell him there’s a new book in it for him if he comes as fast as possible.” He asked his secretary. A few moments later Kakashi arrived. “You get your book if you meet the two old women, Yumi and Yobaba, at the Rose Petal Inn. Once you confirm that they are the business women that bankrupt Gato and own Wave then get them to sponsor us.”

“Ok!” Kakashi said a little too eagerly, but not for the pervy book reason everyone thought. In reality he recognized that name and wanted to see if the old woman was the same old woman who chewed out him and Jiraiya. Once he found the women he smiled, “Long time, no see.”

Yobaba sipped her tea and set it on the table she and her fellow advisor were sitting at, “Tell me, Kakashi. Are you ready to play some games?”


Kisame burst out laughing when he and Itachi arrived and foundTobi whining loudly because of a card on the floor, “So snake butt killed our courier.” He laughed as he looked at the card, which had a little doodle of a laughing snake on it.

“This isn’t funny.” The mask wearing bonehead cried. “Because the courier was killed our sponsor was caught embezzling so now we have no money!” He yelled, but was immediately plowed over by an excited Deidara. “Owie!”

“Oh shut up! Sasori and I found a source of money.”  The bomb user said and the other Akatsuki members saw a few women entering the room with the scorpion-like puppet user. “This is the Cave Dwellers. Th-“

Tobi’s jaw dropped so hard that it made cracks in the floor, “The real Cave Dwellers that make billions designing the best equipment!” He exclaimed.

The woman with long black hair and a small bat tattoo on her neck smirked, “We have several other businesses, but yes. I’m Mary and we want to strike a deal with you.” She let her eyes roam over the ninjas as her 3 ‘sisters’ giggled. “As much as we love the idea of being your sugar mamas I have a more mutually beneficial business deal … of course, if you want something extra we aren’t opposed to that.” She said and the ladies gave flirty winks.


Kimimaro pretended to care about Orochimaru’s ranting after an experiment failed. In reality he was mentally taking down the details of everything in the lab. After all, this was the first time he has been to this particular hidden lab and that means he had much to report to Cave.

It has been a few months since seeing Naruko at the resort and the snake sage has been moving from place to place a lot lately. On top of that he has been making Kimimaro train a great deal. As the time passed the snake sage’s attitude only got worse. 

No doubt the snake sage was getting antsy as the time for a new body drew closer. Plus, Orochimaru wanted to get ready to attack Sasuke. Nothing Danzo said convinced the sage to not try for a Sharingan.  If he finds that Sasuke, who was 16 and about to graduate, is too strong he planned to use Kimimaro as a backup. Despite the constant relocating, training and crazy sage antics Kimimaro couldn’t find it in him to be scared. 

After all, the resort wasn’t the last time he heard from Naruko. It wasn’t just the hilarious video of Danzo crying that was sent to him because Naruko wanted him to see it. The messages he started getting later on were what put a smile on his face. To his joy he started receiving coded messages from a different person than the usual Cave ninja he usually contacts and it was the beautiful blonde! It was hard to be worried about anything when he knew the blonde wasn’t far from him and ready to help if he needed. 

“Everybody out!” Orochimaru yelled out of frustration and everyone bolted as fast as they could.

Kimimaro took the chance to return to his room and prepare a message about the lab to send to Cave. Once he shut his door and pulled out his beetle he felt a tickle in his chest. A couple of seemingly innocent coughs followed only for him to find blood in the hand that he used to cover his mouth ...


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