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Butterflies Fly	By : Cepheus Category: Naruto > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 1130 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Butterflies Fly
- 1
Cepheus: I felt like I needed to write this. I was
in a kinda depressed mood today, and the moment I got home I wrote this short
down. I hope you like.

The poem throughout the fic is mine.
Do not steal.

��

Rating: R

Summary: [ItaNaru] Wearing a mask. And no one
notices. No one realizes� he�s only a breathing chrysalides� as Butterflies
fly. [Naruto POV]

Warnings: shounen
ai. Yaoi. BL. Whatever. Means boy x boy love. Don�t like don�t read don�t
flame. The only flame here is the youthful one Rock Lee possesses.

Disclaimer: if I were Masashi Kishimoto� hell
I am glad I am not. If I were, Naruto would not exist. It�s too troublesome to
create a story out of thin air�

�Talking�
�Thinking�

��

Butterflies Fly

One-Shot (Naruto�s POV)

When did it start?

When did I start lying?

To myself, to the others, it doesn�t matter.

Fooling them, fooling me.

~Like
grey butterflies my thoughts
Dripping
their bright colours like blood~

Putting up an act, to hide the pain that I had inside,
smiling, laughing, joking around and plainly acting stupid. Dumb.

When did it start, I can�t remember.

Really.

I suppose it became a part of me, the cheerful
mask that hides what is behind to the world. I can even come as far as to say I
don�t know myself what�s under the mask. It�s so well placed that right now, it
may have become the true me.

True, false, there is nothing like this.

Just like there is no good or evil. There are
only the reasons why someone lives for, stands up for, dies for, believes in.

What do I believe in?

~What�s
behind the mask?
Nothing.
The mask is the hollow shell of a chrysalides~

I can�t remember. I think that I want to be
Hokage someday.

But that�s what my mask says, so I can�t trust
it. Better judgement than this, I can�t trust myself anymore.

Hatred, loath, rage, fury, obsession, desire,
emptiness, grief, mourn and sadness. I felt all of these things called
emotions. I touched the bottom of the pit and stopped there. Not moving. I
never came to the surface again, drowning in the dark.

What is on the surface is just a foolish act.

And still, they all believe it.

It�s so easy to fool them.

It�s so easy to lie.

It�s so easy it hurts.

But I don�t care.

~Flying
high above the dull world
Where
no life exists~

Every day I lose a part of myself.

Lying. Fooling.

�If I am fine? I�ve never felt better datte
bayo!�

No one notices. No one cares. What they see is
enough to keep them content with their lives. Why should they think I am not
saying the truth? Why should they wonder if I am not that fine after all?

All they see is a smiling idiot. Blue eyes
sparkling with so much happiness it�s almost foolish; foxy grin, glinting
mischievously.

Nothing more.

~Spreading
blood spreading colour
It
faded away into nothingness~

It hurts. But then again, I am used to this kind
of pain.

Who am I?

All my life I lived with the pain. I was the
monster, the demon. I never had a life that could be even remotely normal,
because I am not normal.

So I decided to fake a life.

It was so easy.

Smiling came natural to hide the hurt. To hide
the pain, physical and emotional.

�Will you care?�

�Of course I will, Naruto�.

False.

Hypocrite.

No one cares. No one knows.

They don�t see the pain I hide.

They all fail to see, or maybe, they all force
themselves not to see.

Fooling themselves just as much as I fool
myself.

Maybe I am hypocrite as well.

I always wished someone would see. I always
wished and hoped that maybe one day, someone would come to me and offering me
their hand they would tell me to drop the mask.

To stop hiding.

To stop fooling myself.

~Searching
insanely the butterflies fly
Grey
against the grey sky~

And in the nights, this dream, this hope, gets
the only thing that I can think of. I have no real hope, nothing to expect, I
only get on living, faking, fooling. I don�t think about the next day, I don�t
think what will happen in the future and I don�t think what would happen if I
finally find an answer.

I breathe. I walk. I speak and move and fight
and sleep. I eat and drink and think.

But I don�t live.

It�s the mask that is living. In my place.

I, the real me, is hidden.

Or maybe I lied so much I became this fake me. I
am the fake. I am the mask.

I don�t care.

I just keep on every day.

~The
land is lifeless as the butterflies fly
Searching
for something not even they can know~

Waiting? Wishing?

No. Just existing.

That�s why�

That�s why, if someone sees the mask, if someone
comes to free me, to free me from this myself that I became not even realizing
it, if the fake me breaks and shatters and someone tells me to stop.

I�ll live for that someone.

I�ll do everything for them.

They would became
my everything.

Because I am not living.

~The
sun shines, its light pale,
Chilling
cold instead of warm~

Maybe that�s a hope.

I am still standing. I didn�t end my life.

Maybe the mask I put on is too strong for my own
good� because it�s making me hope. It�s making me wait.

It�s making me wish�

� to exist�

~And the wings are slowly cracking
The
cold and the wind breaking them
But
still flying they keep on searching
Not
even death enough to stop them~

And there I stand.

He�s just in front of me, staring down with
crimson swirling pools of blood, and he�s not speaking. Somewhere at my back, I
can hear voices�

Yelling to step back.

To not look at him.

Faking care.

They are just making sure the demon will be on
their side, even if the demon is into a stupid useless boy.

They yell in fear.

�Naruto! Run!�

I just stare.

One by one the butterflies fall
Crystals of ice crashing on the ground

I fear him and respect him all the same. He
never falters, never shows weakness. He�s stronger than me and still I stand
there, staring back at him as if stating I am going to win.

That�s my mask, that�s my mistake. But that�s
what I appear. That means, that�s what I am.

I should run. Or I should at least fight.

But I don�t care. I just stand there, staring.

Why?

Because for once, someone is looking at me.

Not at the demon.

Not at the mask.

~One
butterfly is left and is flying upwards
Flapping
its grey wings towards the sun~

Crimson bloody eyes are staring at me. Speaking
words I can�t hear but can feel.

�Stop
acting�.

There are no emotions in his orbs, raven hair
dancing around his face with the wind. It�s like there is no one else apart us,
blue meeting crimson, ice and fire clashing against each other. No sounds can
reach my ears as I drown in those beautiful infernos of flames.

He shows nothing. He says nothing.

But I can see. He wears a mask too. A mask that
hides his true self, just like mine. And he can recognize mine as I recognized
his.

~It
never stops, never falters, never looks down
at the
falling mates that had once been with it~

If someone like this exists�

If someone can really see and understand�

If someone appears to offer me a way out�
telling me to drop my mask�

I�ll start living only for them.

~Reaching
up for the sun the butterfly flies,
Forgotten
the loneliness forgotten the pain~

That�s why, grabbing the stretched hand with my
own, feeling warm fingers wrap and curl gently but tightly around mine, pulling
me against a strong and firm frame, I don�t feel bad at all.

I don�t even turn back as he takes me away,
holding me close to his heart, almost tenderly.

And against his, I can finally hear, feel, my
own beat just as strong.

~And being colourless doesn�t matter anymore
Because grey� can be bright too
If sun reaches it and makes it turn into shining silver~

Owari

��

Cepheus: I don�t know where it came from. I was in a
kinda thoughtful mood and I was also depressed. I hope you will leave a review�
bye.
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Butterflies Fly