Completely Unoriginal

BY : c0p13r
Category: Naruto > Het - Male/Female
Dragon prints: 45197
Disclaimer: I make no money from this story and I don't own 'NARUTO'... I kinda don't even own the story idea! But it's different enough to avoid plagiarism.

I accept that this is not an original idea in any way.  I just wanted a crack at it since all other attempts of unoriginality have bottomed out at one chapter.  Maybe we can consider this an AU of an AU of an AU of ‘NARUTO’.  The first AU of an AU of ‘NARUTO’ was nice.  I am not.  I am more objectively agreeable and open to new ideas.


The Losers’ Sensei

ccc Prologue ccc

            “I am very glad you accepted my request,” the Third Hokage said, bowing his head and tipping the rim of his hat.

            The woman sat across from him.  She had certainly accepted, though she seemed not one bit interested in her duty.  A sensei?  A leader of genin?  She figured it absurd.  But maybe there would be advantages.  She had been doing nothing for a while, after all.  And nothing brought nothing.  With a job, she got money.

            “It is a new system devised for those who did not do as well as the others in the academy.  We’ve tried to balance teams in the past, but with those like Naruto…”  Hiruzen pulled out his pipe and sighed.  The young boy was a troublemaker as much as a failure in ninjutsu, but Iruka’s recommendation went without question.  If Naruto could produce as many Shadow Clones as said, he might be able to handle himself on missions.  He peeked at the leader of the new Team 8.  “Will you be able to handle it?”

            The woman held her stance for a moment, considering the obstacle in front of her.  She read over her students.  The boys would be trouble, no doubt, but there wasn’t a man alive she could not subdue!

            She smirked haughtily in reply.

ccc Kiba ccc

            “I’ve always wanted to stick it in your ass,” Kiba told Kushina with a broad, elated smirk.

            The redheaded woman took her mouth off of his great cock, a noisy, sloppy slide of saliva followed by the airy exhale of a sex-starved mother.  She licked her wet lips passionately and savored his youthful taste.  “Please, Kiba-sama,” she said breathlessly to the newly-appointed genin.  She rotated on the forest floor, facing him with the pert cheeks of her ass.  The side of her face went against the dirt of the ground so that her hands may journey to her rear.  The taut cheeks came apart, offering to him the treasured hole.  He got his eyeful of her muff too, grinning stupidly to himself as he saw the fiery red hair adorned on her pubic mound.  But her ass!  That was dominance!  That was where the alpha pulverized his bitch!

            Kiba reared to that hole with all intent to jab through mercilessly.  That hole, so many sizes too small it seemed for his huge cock.  She had told him, before and again, that he was the largest she’d ever seen.  Yes, yes!  Say it again!  He quivered all over, breath hitching and fist tightening.  “Please,” she told him again, and pushed her butt toward him.

            He came before his imagination carried him to Kushina’s tight asshole.  All his edging and vivid fantasy won out over his stamina.  The great cock the fantasized Kushina adored had returned to its meager, underdeveloped size, tightly hidden in his fist as it squirted brusquely onto the floor.  He tightened, groaning and tilting his head back.  “Kushina,” he whined mournfully, knowing that Naruto’s mom was an unobtainable goal.  Visions in his head were all he’d get from her.

            With the disgrace of his pining mopped up with an already-dirty shirt and tossed into his laundry basket, he headed downstairs.  He pulled on his heavy, gray coat and called out to Akamaru.  The small pup yipped and ran to meet him; he liked his privacy in the morning, and Akamaru had learned to wait for him in the hallway until he was done.

            The boy lunged down the stairs excitedly, meeting his mom and sister in the kitchen as always, greeting them more cheerfully than normal.  After all, today was the day he was assigned to a squadron!  Who would his teammates be?  What about the teacher?!  Someone with repute, he hoped.  He reached and grabbed the pitcher of orange juice from across the table.

            Hana sat at the head of the table, assuming the spot of alpha while their mother finished blistering some nice, thick slabs of ham on the over.  Hana hardly seemed much of an Inuzuka with her graceful poise and her keenness to make-up and style.  She ate like she was some Hyuga, sitting at a Hyuga table eating Hyuga food!  Kiba attacked his food, taking a bite everywhere with no organization.

            Hana took her chopsticks to her mouth with a morsel of white rice, and then gave pause.  She noticed a very pungent scent since Kiba arrived, and with his hands wafting everywhere, it offended and interrupted her meal.  She surveyed Kiba with a sidelong stare.  He certainly looked pleased and excited.

            The bit of rice lowered back to the bowl from whence it came.  “Kiba,” she said directly, “your enthusiasm shows, but you could at least wash up afterward.”

            Kiba stopped like his body was suddenly paused, his mouth wide over a full sunny-side-up egg.  It broke before he had time to savor it, and the yolk spilled all over his plate.  “What was that, Nee-chan?!”  He was red in the face, but his sister didn’t care for his embarrassment.

            “You shouldn’t be so reckless,” she stated, and then finally finished the trip of her chopsticks to mouth.

            Kiba gripped his fork – his preferred, quicker method of eating – and came close to bending it out of his frustration.  And Hana had no intention of seeming intimidated.  “It’s good to relieve your baser urges.  It relaxes you.  But you shouldn’t carelessly run from room to table.”

            He was about to fire back and tell her to shut up, but a plate came down hard on the table, scattering the generous assortment of ham and crackling bacon.  Meat for the pack; vegetables came later.  Hana invoked his wrath, but he was not stupid enough to try his mom who sneered down her nose at him.  No doubt, her own keenness to scent was greater than Hana’s; she probably picked it up the moment he opened his bedroom door.  “Kiba,” she started in that strong way that made her a terror to her children, “today is the day you start your training as a genin and meet your trainer.”

            Only the Inuzuka would refer to a sensei as a trainer; like Kiba was some unruly mutt in need of discipline.  He sulked bitterly.

            “I will not let you disgrace the Inuzuka name with careless behavior!”  She pointed hard upstairs.  “Go back, banish your lusts again, and wash up properly!”

            Being told to go masturbate by your mom; Kiba wasn’t very proud of that, though the Inuzuka were a bit strange when it came to personal boundaries.

            Of course, he wanted to shout over his shoulder, he wouldn’t need to do all this if they provided a female for him!

            Forcibly, he ordered Akamaru to wait downstairs.

ccc Naruto ccc

            “C’mon, Mom.  I’m gonna be late,” Naruto, red-faced and nervous, fussed.  His hands tried to refuse her smooching, but Kushina nudged them away with a giggle and put her mouth to his groin again.

            “Almost finished, okay?” she hummed, and then slipped her lips over his small cockhead again, directing all attention to that single point.  She suckled methodically while her tongue wrapped around over and over in an effort to drain her son.  She was so proud of him, she thought as she held his hips down to his bed.  He sat on the edge – as she had instructed – and it was she who pulled his orange pants down over his genitals before administering her mouth.  To calm him down, she had said to him when he first refused.  Not like she’d never helped him with release before; she first discovered his erection during bath time, and she’d been so very willing to tend to him.  He squirted less than she would have expected for a first time, though.  It took some rough handling of his ear to get him to confess, but confess he did, admitting to have learned masturbation since eleven and practicing it up to three times a day.  Her getting a hold of him in the bath was actually his second release of the day, he also admitted.

            So she was there to aid him, stroking or sucking the lust from his loins as she was on this very important day for her son.  He heaved and inevitably clapped a hand over his mouth to stifle his loud release; another trait he earned from his mom: loud orgasms.  His whole body went taut, and she refrained from teasing his tip as he jettisoned his tension.

            Gulp-gulp!  It was easier and cleaner to swallow.  She fondled his young sac, stroking at the testicles within to encourage him not to hold back.  But after being put to bed last night by her hand, his morning load acquainted to no more than two mouthfuls.  No time to preen as usual, to show him his endeavors accumulated in her mouth before going down to her stomach.  Nope, today, she would simply swallow, lick mercifully just to clean, and then detach with a sigh and a swipe at the corner of her mouth.

            Naruto, breathless and relieved, looked away, embarrassed from how she smiled so lovingly at him after being so bad.  “You, you didn’t have to do that, alright?” he pouted, trying to act older than he was.

            Kushina just giggled around the heavy, lingering taste of young cum in her mouth.  She planted a kiss on his whiskers as he stubbornly ascended his underwear and pants.  “You’ll feel better going there now.  You don’t have to push yourself, alright?”

            Naruto continued to boycott eye contact.

            His lack of affection, of course, made her scowl.  She turned her nose up and spoke down to him.  “You shouldn’t be so embarrassed!  I’m sure Tsume is doing the same courtesy for Kiba right now.”  Not likely with those claws and fanged teeth, Naruto doubted.  Besides, what kind of mom puts her mouth… down there?  He decided not to let it bother him, nor would he say his grievances aloud.  Truthfully, maybe it wasn’t so bad, his mom aiding him in such a way.  She was beautiful, having seen her full nudity during their private Uzumaki baths, but he could not bring himself to ask to inspect her woman body.  She jerked him and sucked him, and that should be enough.

            “I’m going now,” he said to her, curving around her and bolting out of his bedroom.  He dashed recklessly through the house, snagging a bit of toast from the table while his dad glanced across the newspaper.  “Good luck, Naruto,” Minato cheered him, and Naruto flashed a cocky thumbs-up before heading out.

            Folding the paper in half, Minato stared after his growing son’s departure.  He didn’t look away when his wife’s hands lazily encircled his neck down to his chest.  “Heh.  He looks a lot more confident now.  You have a way with our boy.”

            Kushina giggled.  “The Uzumaki clan bounces back quickly.  He just needed some encouragement, that’s all.”  She kissed him at the side of his mouth.


            Outside, Naruto ran along the pathway.  Mom was right; he had to give her that much credit.  Having unloaded made his feet lighter and his pace quicker.  A bit dizzy from post-orgasm, but he moved strongly through the streets of Konoha.  He chomped down and finished the toast, swallowing loudly and picking up the pace without the morsel in his mouth.  He was ready for a full sprint when a shout came from above, seizing his motion and causing him to look flatly upward.

            “Hey!”  Down came two of his teammates: Kiba and Akamaru, landing neatly in front of him.  Tossing back his hood, Kiba leered.  “Just heading to the academy now?  You take too long, Naruto.”

            “Ha!  What about you?” Naruto fired back, staring accusingly.  “If you’re out here, that means you also left late.”

            Kiba growled.  “That’s only because of my mom and sister.  Dammit!”  If he hadn’t been sent to his room and had his hands washed until no trace of semen could be found, he would already have been at the academy, and gloating would have felt much more natural.  But maybe this could still be his day.  His glower shifted, and he was grinning like a cocky kid again.  “Well, I guess it doesn’t matter who gets there late.  What matters is who gets there first!  Let’s go, Akamaru!”

            “Hey!  Kiba!  Dammit!”  Naruto couldn’t sway from this challenge.  A loss to Kiba meant a lifetime of him bragging.  Some of the lowest grades in class, yet Kiba pompously held it over Naruto’s head that his scores were higher of the two.

            Try as he might, Naruto just couldn’t compete with the frenzied Inuzuka.  Training in his clan meant survival and tracking, and a lot of that relied on speed.  When Naruto finally dragged in as second place, Kiba – trying to mask how winded he was – laughed and asked if his dust was a better breakfast than his mom’s cooking.

            Naruto hated Kiba speaking of his mom, for it was no secret how the Inuzuka undressed her constantly with his eyes, going so far as to bait Naruto into conflict by guessing her sizes.  “Double-D’s!” Kiba would always guess with certainty – though Naruto wouldn’t say that he was way off the mark.  Maybe his mom was stacked, but she wasn’t holstering boulders in her bra.

            To the point, when Kiba mentioned his mom, Naruto landed a punch square in his shit-eating grin.  Kiba recoiled, eyes wide after being caught off-guard.  He planted his feet while Akamaru growled and yapped at Naruto.  “You-you wanna fight?” Kiba dared, bringing up his fists, ready to pummel Naruto with Akamaru.

            “Enough, idiots!”  Iruka whacked them both in the back of the head with his fists, negating their anger and bringing them to heel.  “How can you both be so thickheaded?” he scolded them both as they moaned and complained about his discipline.  He ignored their hurt glares and shoved his finger to the rest of the class, revealing that there was no class!

            “What?!  Where is everyone?!”

            “Yes!”  Naruto pumped his fists at his sides, staring up at Iruka with stars in his eyes.  “Iruka-sensei, we’re the first ones here?!”  Such a feat surely meant another round at Ichiraku.

            “Don’t be stupid,” sighed Iruka, touching his forehead.  “You two were so late, every other team had already been dismissed!  Now your own sensei has wandered off!  And I’ll need to find her!”

            Her?  Kiba took that into consideration.  He expected a rugged man of the world, someone great to lead him to greatness!  How many women in this world had achieved greatness?  First Hokage, Second, Third; the White Fang; the Yellow Flash; all men of repute, not a single woman mentioned.  Girls, in Kiba’s opinion, should just be cheering on the boys (though saying that out loud at home would be a punishing mistake).

            “She left?”  Naruto frowned and put his arms across his chest.  His fox-face scrunched disapprovingly.  “Is she not taking me seriously?  I’m Uzumaki Naruto, the guy who’s gonna take over as Hokage when the old man quits!”

            “A future Hokage shouldn’t be late to his assignment day,” Iruka retorted like a teacher.  “Now you both wait here.  She shouldn’t have wandered too far.”  His tone of voice lacked sureness while he stepped out of the classroom and shut the door behind him.

            Kiba snorted, turning his head and grimacing.  “Pah!  Some woman is gonna try to lead us?  She couldn’t even stick around for us to show up.  Is she even dependable?”

            “Right, right!” Naruto agreed, waving his arms with big blue eyes.  “She’s just goofing around.”

            “I’ll report her to my mom,” Kiba suggested vindictively, and Naruto agreed again, approaching in a huddle, saying that his own mom would be upset that his teacher was a slacker.  “Then maybe we can get someone a little more famous, like that Kakashi guy.”

            Naruto thought for a moment, and then lit up with recognition.  “Yeah!  He was my dad’s pupil!”

            “If we can get him as our teacher,” Kiba said enthusiastically, “we’ll be on the fast track to fame and glory!”

            It was a good plan – in the simple minds of children – but Naruto wanted to add a little something extra: a prank, to teach their soon-to-be-ex sensei not to take them lightly.  And Kiba was all in for a little mischief.  An eraser wedged in the door; it seemed a little simplistic.  Kiba upped the ante, saying that a cup of water might produce better results, which Naruto agreed with giddy glee.  Some doing, trial and error and three spills; Kiba and Naruto got the cup of water to stay in the cracked door.  Like fools, they snickered and waited, and waited and snickered.  It was the better part of an hour before they got bored and just lazed about the empty tables.  Where was she?  Was Iruka-sensei incapable of finding her?  Akamaru stirred at Kiba’s feet under the table; housebroken, but he could only hold out for so long.  Kiba tapped the table.  “Just a little longer,” he grumbled.

            Naruto, sitting on Iruka’s desk, hummed disgruntledly.  He considered what the others were doing, like that bastard Sasuke being put with Sakura-chan and that weirdo Shino; Ino-Shika-Cho stayed stuck together, but the unfortunate girl – Hyuga Hinata, if he remembered right – was placed on their team too.  Choji had said that he always liked Hinata.  It was his lucky break, though Naruto would never say that it was a ‘romantic’ like; more like the detestable ‘like’ of Kiba ‘liking’ Kushina.

            “I’m gonna fuck her ass someday,” Choji had growled like a beast over some pork barbeque, meat juices dripping down his fat face as he glared at Naruto.  He chomped more meat, fuming on how he wanted to pork Hinata.

            Voices…  Naruto sat up, and Kiba did the same.  A woman’s voice and Iruka-sensei’s; this was it!  The two boys leaned forward expectantly to see the misguided woman’s folly, writing them both off and wandering off on her own.  And what of the third member of their troop?  It was only then that Naruto considered the third member, but he dropped the matter entirely when a set of fingers caught the shutter door and slid it open to marvelous success.

            The water poured straight down over the hapless teacher’s head, wetting her blonde hair, soaking her porcelain face down to her bosom.

            And what a bosom!  The cheer on their faces diminished, and they were left gawking at the twin breasts that refused the final two buckles of her standard flack jacket.  Now wet, they glistened attractively, though the entire beauty of the woman held gaze.

            With a near-empty bottle of saké dangling from her other hand, Tsunade observed the cup that had tipped water over her, bounced off her prodigious cleavage, and circled to a stop on the floor.  Methodically, she knelt – her breasts still under heavy scrutiny by the two boys – and picked up the cup before righting herself.  “Hmm.”  She touched her chin, looking up thoughtfully.  “My first impression…”

            The cup was squashed flat in Tsunade’s fist as she flared.

            “… I'm going to clobber you brats!!


Where will I go with this while working out Part 0 of 'There's a hole at the hot springs!'?  Should I make Kushina a slut?  It would be a new road for me, but we got Tsunade's giant knockers to contend with as well!  Or who knows?  I might do like all others and bottom out at one chapter!

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