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Define the Undefinable	By : Sasunarufan13 Category: Naruto > Yaoi - Male/Male > Naruto/Sasuke Views: 547 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto nor make profit of it. Kishimoto owns it.

Chapter List
- 1-Define the Undefinable
- 1
Author's note: I have no idea what this is. It's something I came up with on the fly after I've been staring too long at way too small kanji in manga. I'm sorry if it sucks. I'm working on the other projects, don't worry; my mind is just a mess.
Warnings: Various pov's; canon divergent; slash; mentions of the Uchiha massacre; drama; some angst
I hope you'll like it somewhat at least!
Define the Undefinable
It's trying to do right by them
The moment his little brother was born and Itachi held his frail, tiny body in his arms, the five year old made the silent but solemn promise that he would always be there for his little brother. He would take care of him in whichever way was needed, because even as a newly born, little Sasuke had stolen his heart already.
Mother might have carried him and given birth to him, but it was Itachi who was always the first one to wake up whenever Sasuke started crying in the middle of the night, the first one to soothe the fussy baby and give him his food. Some of the clan members started to joke that wherever you saw Itachi, you saw Sasuke as well, because Itachi often carried his baby brother around in a sling. They appeared stuck to each other with glue to the point that mother would jokingly ask if she was allowed to hold her youngest son.
Even as Sasuke grew older and Itachi started to receive more complicated and dangerous missions, Itachi still tried to spend as much time with Sasuke as possible. Father was finally paying more attention to his youngest son, but from experience Itachi knew that father's attention wasn't always preferable.
"Go gather your kunai; I'll practice with you," Itachi smiled; his chest warming at the sight of Sasuke beaming up at him before the younger boy rushed inside the house, eager to collect his kunai.
Shisui was grinning for some reason and Itachi quirked an eyebrow, silently asking what was so amusing.
"Nothing," Shisui chuckled, straightening up from his slouch against the tree. "Just thought that if I didn't know better I'd say you're his dad."
Itachi pursed his lips. "Well, someone has to train with him and father is not going to do it."
"Hey, there's nothing wrong with spending time with your brother," Shisui said quietly and gently clasped his shoulder. "Pretty sure the kid appreciates it a lot."
"Yeah …" As Itachi watched Sasuke come running out of their home, he thought that he appreciated their time together a lot too.
Because even though Sasuke was growing older, he never minded spending time with his older brother when other people had started complaining that their younger siblings no longer were interested in spending time with them.
No matter what would happen, he would always be there for his little brother.
When Danzo gave him the choice that really wasn't a choice at all, Itachi's only thought was that he had to keep his brother safe. No matter what he had to do, no matter which awful atrocities he had to commit, as long as his little brother remained unharmed, he didn't care.
If he had to make himself into Sasuke's enemy, if doing so meant that one day Sasuke would be seen as a hero by others and their last name would no longer be that tainted … That was a sacrifice he was willing to make.
He hated himself for ruining Sasuke's life that night by taking away everyone they had loved, but at least Sasuke was still alive. Sasuke was left unharmed and would be able to grow up and take revenge and that was all that mattered to Itachi. Danzo would never be able to reach Sasuke, Itachi would make sure of that.
If Sasuke would hate him long after Itachi would be dead … He would be able to live with that, because a Sasuke who hated him was a Sasuke who was still alive.
As long as his little brother was safe, nothing else mattered.
It's trying to steer them onto the right path
"I ALREADY TOLD YOU I'M NOT INTERESTED! ARE YOU DEAF?!"
Even if Kakashi hadn't had any idea where to find his team, the roar of absolute fury would have certainly done the trick. Masking a sigh, he paused, watching Sakura run away from the training ground in tears. So distraught was she that she didn't even notice she ran straight past her sensei, away from what should have been a training session for the three Genin. He debated going after her, but he'd never done well with female tears and he figured that keeping Sasuke from potentially murdering someone was probably better.
So, even with slight apprehension boiling in the pit of his stomach, he continued his way to the training ground. He found Sasuke at the edge of it, palming the side of his neck, but if the Curse Mark had reacted to his anger, he'd got complete control over it now and his skin was void of the dark markings.
"Wasn't there a better way to let her down?" Kakashi asked mildly, pressing his lips together when he was instantly met with a pissed off glare.
Not for the first time he wondered whether he really should have accepted the Third Hokage's offer to teach Team Seven. So far being their leader had led to an increase of aspirin; the pharmacist was starting to become concerned.
"If she'd stop bugging me about that crap, we wouldn't be having any problems!" Sasuke snapped, his hand twitching suspiciously close to his kunai pouch.
"A girl's feelings are a delicate matter," Kakashi started to say, but Sasuke snorted harshly, cutting him off.
"There's nothing delicate about her whenever she smashes Naruto's face into the ground."
Which okay, was fair, Kakashi supposed, concealing another sigh. He himself was often surprised by her show of strength whenever she thought Naruto was being annoying. As violent as she could be towards Naruto, as sweet and giggly was she towards Sasuke, even after so many failed attempts at getting a date out of him. It was giving Kakashi a whiplash to be frank. His team had to be the most dysfunctional one in existence and he had at one point been in the same team as Obito.
"You know you can't keep feeding the Mark, Sasuke," Kakashi warned him.
It only earnt him another foul glare. "Like I don't know that!" Sasuke hissed and stomped towards the middle of the training ground, stretching his arms.
Kakashi dragged a hand over his face, careful not to dislodge his mask. He had no idea what the hell he was supposed to do. How did one deal with a team where one of the members was the holder of a Bijuu, the other was a descendant of the mighty Uchiha clan who got himself Marked by Orochimaru, and the third one was a girl with her head too far in the clouds at times? That was just a cocktail for an explosion and the fact that such a thing hadn't occurred yet, that his team hadn't imploded so far after all that had happened was nothing short of a miracle.
"How would you have handled this, Minato-sensei?" he muttered lowly, flicking his eyes up to the sky.
Now more than ever was he in need of some serious guidance from the one he'd once called his leader before he'd been a Hokage to everyone else. What was he supposed to do that somehow wouldn't disrupt the delicate balance they had going on even further? No matter what he said, no matter what he did, he didn't seem to be able to get through to Sasuke and time was running out.
Sasuke was growing more irritable by the day, the Mark feeding on his anger and his frustration, and any day now things would go south.
Even their special training didn't seem to do much but irritate Sasuke even further; his obsession with Naruto's progress making him wanting to push his own training more than his body could handle. Initially Kakashi had thought that Sasuke's focus on Naruto's progress would be a good thing, something that could spur the dark haired boy on without strengthening the Mark more.
Now he wasn't so sure anymore to the point where he wondered whether there was still a friendly rivalry between them or whether it had boiled down into nothing but envy and anger.
"I'm not cut out for this," he sighed, not for the first time.
Something blond flashing in the corner of his eye had him turning his head. Naruto had arrived; the blond boy looking around curiously.
"Sakura-chan not here yet?" he questioned, drawing closer to Kakashi.
"No, she's not feeling well," Kakashi lied. There was no reason to drag Naruto into the little spat between Sasuke and Sakura, because from past experience that would only make things worse with Naruto likely to take Sakura's side.
Why did I have to get the dysfunctional ones?
Naruto gazed at Sasuke, who by now was throwing kunai into one of the bullseyes with such an alarming intensity and accuracy that it even made Kakashi slightly uneasy.
"The bastard pissed again?" Naruto asked. His tone was almost conversational, his stance nonchalant with his arms crossed behind his head, but his eyes were sharp and knowing.
Kakashi blinked. Sometimes it was easy to forget that for all the stupid jokes and boisterous laughter, there was a serious side to Naruto to, a side so focused on Sasuke that he picked up every nuance even from this distance.
There was no reason to lie this time. "Yeah, you can say that," Kakashi sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. Was there even a point in holding the training session when one of the members was probably curled up in her bed now, licking her wounds?
"Well, he's never been a morning person," Naruto quipped.
Before Kakashi could even consider stopping him, Naruto went over to Sasuke, calling out, "Hey, bastard, you ready to spar? I want to kick your butt!"
Sasuke paused and Kakashi was already preparing himself for yet another outburst, readying himself to jump in between them, but it wasn't necessary. While still definitely not in a good mood, the Sasuke who turned around to face Naruto wasn't murderous anymore and he was even capable of smirking, tossing his head towards the centre of the training ground.
"Like you could even touch me once!" he taunted, firing up Naruto in return.
"Oh just you wait, you damn bastard! I will wipe the floor with you!"
"You've been saying that for months now," Sasuke said dismissively, but his stance was serious when he stopped in the middle of the field.
"I WILL RUB THAT STUPID PRETTY FACE OF YOURS RIGHT INTO THE DIRT, SASUKE-TEME!" Naruto shrieked furiously, flying towards Sasuke like an enraged cat.
Well, maybe a training session between the two of them wouldn't be that bad, Kakashi decided. At the very least it appeared to make Sasuke less murderous, which was always a good thing.
He would talk to Sakura later – once he'd figured out a way to make her realise that persistence wasn't always key.
It's trying to meet their standards
The second she'd laid eyes on the handsome dark haired boy in her class, Sakura knew she'd lost her heart. Every day was spent trying to get to know more about Sasuke, but unfortunately each day also ended in a failure. Either because she hadn't managed to scrounge up the courage to approach him or because he'd simply dismissed her, just as he dismissed everyone else attempting to talk to him. He did talk to the class clown, Uzumaki, she'd noticed, but it wasn't the sort of attention she would want for herself, with Sasuke mocking Uzumaki whenever he messed up and Uzumaki being rude to him in return. She'd rather he ignored her than mocked her, thank you very much.
When she ended up in the same team as Sasuke, it was as if the gods themselves had smiled down upon her. She, in the same team as Sasuke? That had to be fate! From now on, things would be better, she was sure of it! Because now she had an excuse to hang out with him, a reason to spend time with him and that made her better than all the other girls, who were definitely jealous of her now.
Even while sharing the same team, however, things were … difficult. Sasuke barely paid her any mind and any attempt from her side to spend some quality time together outside of sparring were rebuked each and every time.
"Just give it a bit more time, honey," Mother smiled encouragingly, hugging her warmly after she'd returned home forlornly after yet another rejection. "He'll come around, you'll see."
But he didn't. Instead of returning her feelings, Sasuke dropped her entirely when he decided to leave the village and join Orochimaru. Even her desperate offer to take her with him so she wouldn't have to be alone didn't sway him at all.
Waking up after she'd been knocked out by him was an abrupt and ice cold wake-up call. Sasuke had barely even looked at her when she'd pleaded her case and now he was gone, off to train with Orochimaru and kill his brother. Naruto had disappeared as well. Barely healed from his battle with Sasuke, he had left the village too, at the side of Jiraiya, determined to become stronger in order to bring Sasuke back once and for all.
And Sakura?
She wandered aimlessly through the village for a while, the lack of team members forcing her to remain inside the walls, unable to take on any missions. Walking through the streets only made her painfully aware of just how weak she still was. She'd believed she'd grown stronger, but in the end she hadn't even been able to convince Sasuke to stay. It hadn't been her progress he'd been impressed by, it hadn't been her strength that had pushed him to train harder and harder.
It was a tough pill to swallow, but she had to concede that even whilst being in the same team, Naruto had still managed to usurp most of Sasuke's attention. Because he hadn't been so weak after all, had grown stronger with leaps and bounds, astonishing them all, and now he was off to grow even stronger. Both he and Sasuke were chasing after their own dreams, and Sakura?
She needed to grow stronger too. She wouldn't, couldn't, be left behind by them. When they would see each other again, her, Naruto and Sasuke, she'd be on equal foot with them, she would make sure of that! It would no longer be only Naruto Sasuke would look at with admiration, you'd see!
So she went to Tsunade and begged to be taken on as her apprentice and she never complained once, no matter how difficult the training was.
Next time she would see both of them, she would no longer be that weak little girl they had to protect all the time!
In the end, however, her hard work and perseverance never seemed to really matter. Because even when Sasuke came back to them, the war finally over, his brother and Akatsuki dead, she remained nothing but a fleeting thought in his mind, no matter what she did. Those dark eyes she longed to have upon her never went further than casting her the occasional glance, sliding over her like she was part of the background.
It felt like no matter what she did, she would never be good enough for him.
It's learning to let go
Her dream of Sasuke being her white knight didn't last longer than a month after meeting him.
Looking back on it, Karin could admit she'd gone way overboard at times, throwing herself too desperate at him. No wonder he'd never taken her seriously when in his eyes she'd probably been nothing but a vapid fangirl, like all the other girls in Konoha. But while those girls had only focused on his good looks, Karin had got to know the real Sasuke, all the parts that made him who he was, the ugly and the beautiful.
The real Sasuke wasn't perfect. The real Sasuke had felt no remorse, not even a twinge of hesitation when he'd stabbed her right through her chest in order to reach Danzo. The real Sasuke had problems apologising, but had no trouble rejecting any flirting attempt.
The real Sasuke wouldn't sweep her off her feet, no matter how much she daydreamed, because the real Sasuke had his heart stolen a long time ago.
Karin hadn't realised it at first. That Sasuke's dispassion had not only to do with the fact that he simply wasn't interested in her, but that he had his eyes on someone already. Even when he had fallen into the darkness, ready to embrace it in order to gain what he wanted, there had been one person always on his mind. That one person had managed to catch him before he fully fell, had been there even at his lowest, when the whole world had turned against Sasuke.
When Karin herself had no longer be certain whether she could trust him enough to remain in the same team.
A part of her, a silly girlish part, had hoped that with the war over, perhaps she and Sasuke could make amends in a different way. Perhaps now that Sasuke was no longer obsessed with revenge, they could start building something between the two of them.
It had been a nice dream to have, something that had kept her going while trying to clean up the mess in what had once been Sound.
It had taken just one afternoon spent in the company of Sasuke and his best friend Naruto to make Karin realise she never had stood a chance after all. Even now, when the war was over and revenge could no longer be had, there was no way her daydream would ever become reality.
"Sorry you had to see that," Suigetsu murmured, for once no taunting smirk on his face. He had his body turned towards her, shielding her from the scene she'd been about to walk into unknowingly.
Karin blinked, the stinging behind her eyeballs annoying her. "Yeah well, guess that's on me for being stupid and holding on to hope," she chuckled watery.
Thirty feet away from them, Sasuke and Naruto stood; the blond man leaning against an oak, laughing at something Sasuke was telling him before Sasuke bent down and kissed him again. The look on Sasuke's face was so soft, so tender, something inside Karin squeezed painfully.
How many times hadn't she hoped to see that kind of look directed at her? How many nights hadn't she laid there, fantasising about Sasuke holding her close and looking at her like she was the only thing in existence?
"I wouldn't call you stupid," Suigetsu said quietly.
She snorted wetly, smacking his shoulder. "Careful, Suigetsu. I might start to think you actually know what compassion is," she joked.
Instead of rising to the bait, he looked at her with his eyebrows furrowed and his eyes worried. "You're going to be okay?"
She took a deep breath and glanced at the two men again. They were so absorbed in their own little world, they probably didn't even feel her gaze on them. It would have been nice to have that, but …
She smiled, squeezing Suigetsu's arm, before turning around, figuring it was better to give the couple some privacy still. "I will be," she promised.
She still loved Sasuke; watching him with somebody else hadn't diminished that feeling. For all she knew she might love him her entire life, because there was just something about Sasuke that pulled you in and didn't let you go.
She was going to be okay, regardless. Because above all, she wanted Sasuke to be happy and even if she couldn't be the one to make him happy … That was okay. If Sasuke was happy, she would be too for him. She could do that, because she loved him.
She supposed she and Naruto had that in common at least.
It's accepting them for who they are
"Dude, I'm not like, trying to be an arsehole here," Kiba started hushed; his eyes wide with worry. "But are you really sure about this? Uchiha doesn't really have a nice track record when it comes to you know, mental stability and crap like that."
Naruto snorted, rolling his eyes, while he dumped another shirt in his bag. "Kiba, man, you and Akamaru are literally attached to each other, you're not that mental stable yourself, you know?"
"You know what I mean, Naruto," Kiba said exasperatedly and when Naruto looked at him, he was met with a scowl. "I'm just worried about you, man. What if he snaps again?"
"He won't," Naruto reassured, snatching the picture of Team Seven off his nightstand and carefully wrapping it in a shirt he barely used. That was also put inside his bag.
"I'm all for that confidence, but you can't know that," Kiba stressed. "During the war, the shit he said back then …"
"Look, even if he snaps again – which he won't - " Naruto insisted, pausing in packing his bag, "I'll be there to pull him right back. We'll be fine, I promise."
"You shouldn't have to pull him back, though. Naruto, after all you did for him - "
"He's my best friend, Kiba," Naruto said and this time his voice brooked no argument. "I'll always be there for him, no matter what."
"But why do you have to travel the world with him? Can't you stay here for at least a little bit? It's not like he's been in the village for that long!" Kiba said exasperatedly.
Akamaru raised his head, but laid back down when he realised nothing was wrong.
"He doesn't feel comfortable in the village and I don't blame him," Naruto sighed, squatting down to see if he'd forgotten something underneath the bed. "His entire family was massacred here and you expect him to feel at ease here? I know you're not that cold-hearted, Kiba."
"I get it," Kiba said frustrated, running his hands through his hair. "But man, I just hate that you're going to leave for him, you know? I really worry about you, dude."
"Well, don't," Naruto stated firmly. "I can take care of myself just fine. Not that I need it, because Sasuke isn't going to do anything, geez. You make him out to be some kind of psycho," he complained.
"Even Sakura isn't entirely comfortable around him," Kiba pointed out.
"Yeah well, Sakura is still holding on to the image she has of him," Naruto muttered, straightening up again and zipping the bag shut. "It's not his fault she can't deal with how he is in reality."
"And who's that?"
"My best friend," Naruto said simply. He glanced at the clock. "Don't you have a mission to start by the way? It's nearly three o'clock."
"Oh fuck!" Kiba cursed when he realised the time and pointed a finger at Naruto. "You better send us letters while you're on the road, you hear me? I want to make sure your dumbass stays alive!"
"Yeah, yeah." Naruto rolled his eyes and waved him off. "I'll send letters, I promise. Now go, before you have to face Hinata-chan's disappointment."
Kiba flipped him the bird, but left in a hurry, unwilling to let his team wait any longer.
"So he makes how many people now that have tried to convince you I'm insane?"
The monotone, but familiar voice had Naruto turning around, watching Sasuke melt out of the shadows from the bathroom. "How long have you been there?" he asked interestedly. He hadn't even felt Sasuke sneaking inside, but then again, he'd been pretty preoccupied with Kiba's bullshit.
"Long enough," Sasuke replied and leant his shoulder against the doorjamb. "So? How many people?"
"The tenth or eleven or so?" Naruto squinted, before he shrugged. "Lost count to be honest. Not that it matters. You ready to go?"
"You're not worried they're right?" Sasuke asked, avoiding his question.
"Oh damn, don't you start too," Naruto groaned and dropped his bag onto the bed again before crossing the distance between them. "I know you're not insane and I know you're not going to hurt me. Everything else they don't have any business with it."
"I could slip," Sasuke murmured; his dark eyes wavering.
"You could," Naruto said carelessly and wrapped his arms around Sasuke's neck. "And I'll be right there to pull you back, like I promised. I'm not afraid, Sasuke, never have been."
"Well, you've always been an idiot," Sasuke sneered.
His sneer melted away when Naruto leant up on his tiptoes to kiss him, tugging at the dark locks. "You're stuck with this idiot now, though," he said cheerfully, pulling back after another peck on the lips. He snatched his bag from the bed and returned to Sasuke's side. "Now, come on, let's sneak out before Kakashi thinks he's found another reason to keep us here."
Sasuke snorted, but closed his remaining arm around Naruto, pulling him closely to him as he opened a portal.
"You ready?" Sasuke asked; his eyes shimmering softly.
Naruto grinned, wrapping his free arm around Sasuke's waist. "Hell yeah. Been ready since forever, bastard!"
In synch, they stepped forwards into the portal. Lips whispered something against his temple and Naruto smiled, tightening his grip around Sasuke's hip.
Whatever laid in store for them once they stepped out of the portal, he knew they would be fine. Because they had each other and that was all that mattered.
The End
AN2: I don't know, guys. Like I said, a bit of a mess. Sorry.
Please leave your thoughts behind in a review; should you spot any mistakes, please point them out to me.
I hope to see you all back in my future stories! Please stay safe and take care of yourselves!
Cuddles
Melissa
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Define the Undefinable