Adult-FanFiction.org : Naruto

Another Perfect Wonder	By : jaded_priceless Category: Naruto > Yaoi - Male/Male > Kakashi/Iruka Views: 10012 -:- Recommendations : 1 -:- Currently Reading : 4
Disclaimer: I make no profit from this work of fiction. Full disclaimer inside

Chapter List
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Disclaimer: I am not rich, Japanese, a publishing house or a movie company. Naruto and its characters belong to Kishimoto Masashi. Lord Washizu, the Cobweb Forest and The Throne of Blood as well as Seven Samurai and the character Manzo and his suspicious nature belong to Akira Kurosawa. Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann and the village of Giha belongs to Gainax and co-produced by Aniplex and Konami.

Tsunade groaned as the official emissary of the Fire Country Daimyo left her office leaving several gifts for his three daughters and for the families they had married into during the past year. Shizune and Ibiki watched as Tsunade kept her promise and completed the mission request paperwork before handing it to Ibiki as dictated per non classified mission procedure.
“Hokage-sama, are you sure this ranking is correct?” It was rare for Ibiki to question his Hokage, but as acting head of ANBU, S-class missions were his responsibility. He didn’t want his spotless reputation tarnished by a delivery mission where a B ranking would have been more appropriate.
“It’s from the Daimyo and time sensitive. That warrants the S-ranking,” Tsunade grouchily explained.
Ibiki nodded before once again questioning his Hokage, “Are you sure about the shinobi assigned to this mission? There are others who are faster and have a higher field rating.”
“Do you doubt me, Ibiki?” Tsunade asked, glaring at the scarred man. The visit from the daimyo’s representative had interrupted her morning sake and she was not in a good mood.
“No, ma’am,” Ibiki flinched. The motion so slight it went unnoticed by all but the Hokage. “It’s just that solo S ranked missions are normally assigned to jounin or ANBU.”
“Normally you’d be correct, but he’s the only person I’m certain can do this,” Tsunade sighed waiving her hand to summon two ANBU. “Cat, fetch the Cockroach. Boar, send whomever is loitering in the mission room to the Academy to substitute.”

“Okay kids, I want you to study the chakra control theory quietly for the next 30 minutes. If everyone makes above 90% this will be the last pop quiz I give you this year.” Iruka chuckled quietly as his students, including Konohamaru, buried themselves in their textbooks. There were only four days left until winter break and bribes of no pop quizzes or homework were prime incentives for good behavior.
The students weren’t the only ones looking forward to the holiday break and New Year’s celebration. Iruka had spent the passing of the previous two years on solo missions outside of the village and was beginning to think Tsunade harbored a grudge against him. The sudden appearance of an ANBU, bearing a scowling Genma, derailed the train of thought carrying Iruka's hopes of attending the holiday party and reinforcing his theory about Tsunade.
“Okay children, it looks like I have a mission. Be good for your substitute while I am away.” Iruka smiled evilly as he packed his things and passed on his lesson plans for the next few days. “Genma, please give them this pop quiz in thirty minutes. You know where I keep the others if they misbehave.”
Iruka was able to give his student’s one final warning and well wishes for the holiday before the ANBU teleported him away.

“Ah, Cockroach, nice of you to arrive so swiftly,” Tsunade smiled.
Iruka cringed. He despised that codename. “With all due respect, Hokage-sama, please don’t call me that.”
“Nonsense, what else would I call an operative who is impervious to disease,” Tsunade grinned, rubbing her hands in glee.
Iruka closed his eyes to keep them from rolling. He’d escaped being experimented on as a child by Orochimaru only to draw Tsunade’s attention during a routine medical exam. The natural immunities passed on by his foreign born parents, combined with living in the orphanage as a child and choosing an occupation where he was surrounded by children who were still learning proper hygienic procedures had blessed (or cursed) him with a damn near perfect immune system. “Hokage-sama, you know I’m not impervious to disease. I just have an abnormal resistance to colds, flus, and viruses.”
“That is precisely why you are the only one I can send on this mission. The daimyo just sent over a few gifts that need to be delivered to his daughters. I’m sure you remember they’d married nobles in River, Rain and Snow countries earlier this year.”
Iruka remembered. He’d created special courses on each country to coincide with the weddings. He also remembered it Konoha’s flu season, malaria season in River Country; cholera season in Rain Country; and the best time to catch what was commonly known as “the shakes” in Snow Country – a nasty illness that caused its suffers to shake from both high fever and chills.
“The gifts need to be delivered in time for New Year's Day.” Tsunade continued.
“What? That’s less than 10 days. I don't think Gai can move that fast,” Iruka yelled forgetting he was in his Hokage’s presence.
“Relax, it can be done quite simply,” Tsunade declared with the ease of someone who frequently traveled great distances very swiftly to avoid gambling debts. “Iruka, give me your map. Shizune, give me a blank scroll.”
Tsunade placed the blank scroll between the standard issue map and one she produced from somewhere within her robes and used chakra to merge the information onto one document. “This is an S-class scroll and it is vitally important that no one but you see it. The lines in red are national borders. The lines in blue are rivers. The lines in green are escape routes. The X’s are safe houses. If you use the green lines you can move swiftly from location to location.”
“What are the things that look like dice and sake bottles?” Iruka asked suspiciously.
“Hehe..ahh...erm... avoid the dice. If you hit any of the sake bottles on your way back to the village, here’s another scroll that will make transportation easy. I look forward to seeing you at the beginning of February. Travel safely, shinobi, and be careful,” Tsunade cautioned after sealing the gifts into scrolls and handing them to Iruka.
He quickly secured them in his vest and bowed respectfully, “Yes, Hokage-sama. I’ll be on my way.”
“THAT DAMN BRAT DID WHAT?!
Iruka was halfway down the stairs when he heard the Hokage yelling .
“UMINO, GET BACK UP HERE”
Iruka had already turned around when he heard Tsunade’s bellows. After years of dealing with Naruto, he recognized that tone as the one related to the three Cs of his job – capturing, controlling and containing children. Naruto was out of the village so that only left Konohamaru.
He was surprised to learn the brat in question wasn’t one of his.
“Iruka, take these with you,” Tsunade growled and handed him four vials. “flu shot, general immune system stimulant, and protection against the shakes as well as that disgusting stomach flu that invades the northern countries this time of year. That idiot Kakashi left for a mission near the border of the Land of Snow and Lightning Country without getting his winter physical. The village you’re going to is near that area. Rent a cabin, hang out for a while. You know the procedure. Just wait for him to come to you.”

Unlike shinobi who spent most of their time in the field, Iruka did not keep a bag packed and ready to leave the village. His missions were so varied and sporadic that he preferred to pack for each one as it was assigned to avoid carrying unnecessary objects, or omitting necessary items. He quickly created a list of the things he would need, packed his bags and sealed his apartment before dropping his perishable food items at the orphanage on his way out of the village.
He made sure there were no other chakra signatures nearby before unfolding the lightweight bamboo braces and attaching the opalescent silk “wings” he’d added to what his standard issue backpack. He’d learned at an early age that the key to a good prank was getting away.
After a lesson on early types of protective gear during his academy days he adapted the silk covering used by Mongolian warriors as a shield against projectile weapons to suit his own needs. The aerodynamic design caught the wind enabling him to go farther with each step without using more chakra. The shimmering fabric captured light and reflected it back into the eyes of his pursuers so they never really got a good look at him or what he was wearing.
A few hours later, Iruka found himself at the River Country border. He surveyed the land and consulted his map while stopping to refill his canteen and have a light snack. He then zipped away his wings and pulled the snowshoes and chakra netting from his pack. The wide base that made snow travel easier was also effective in muddy marshlands. The lightly charged net repelled insects and other unpleasant creatures. Two days after leaving his village he’d completed the first of his deliveries.
The journey to the border of Rain was also peaceful. Unlike River Country, which didn’t have a ninja village, Rain was a bit more difficult to get into. The upheaval of the previous wars had left the country unstable and its people bitter. The arranged marriage to one of the Fire Country’s princesses was an effort on behalf of both nations to ease political tensions and dampen the seeds of a dangerous new religion. As such, the majority of Iruka’s burden would be left at the young daimyo’s palace.
After several hours of being detained at the checkpoint, Iruka was granted admission to the nation. He walked slowly and deliberately, letting the rain hit his body without even a cloak to shield him. Foreign shinobi clad in raingear were often accused of being spies and attacked without warning. No one could fault citizens for being mistrustful of “suspicious people sneaking about the village” even if their bodies later turned up with later bearing signs of torture and chakra induced injuries.
Three days later, he was racing across the northern edge of Fire Country on one of the green routes Tsunade’s map listed. He arrived at the Fire Country/Sound border shortly after nightfall. He only had five days to complete his final delivery, but traveling that close to Sound without adequate rest was foolish. He studied his surroundings and used the information he’d learned working in the mission room about border patrols to decide where to set up camp.
After finding a spot that was far enough from the patrol route he wouldn’t be a nuisance, but close enough he would feel safe sleeping; Iruka removed the chakra net and a pot from his bag and secured the rest of his materials. He then left to gather a few edible plants and go fishing. A short time later Iruka returned to his campsite. He quickly built a small fire and placed a pot full of water beside it. Once the water was boiling, he added rice to the vegetation and fish and set the mixture over the fire. It wasn’t long before he was surrounded by four ANBU members.
“Hi, guys. I figured I might have some company so I made enough for several people.” Iruka said pointing to the large leaves he’d found to use as bowls while his stew was cooking.
He received an angry growl in response. “Why are you setting up camp in this area?”
Iruka wasn’t quite able to place the voice; but going by the stance and agitated demeanor he guessed that Yuugao was the ANBU growling at him. “I’m on a mission. It was safer to stop here before continuing to my destination.”
“Let me get this straight.” This time a different ANBU growled at him. “You’re on a mission so you decide to build a fire and cook dinner without bothering to hide the smoke or scent of food cooking?”
“Yes.” Iruka nodded for emphasis. “I’m still in Fire Country, but this close to the Sound border I would most likely get killed or injured by Konoha border patrols if I tried to avoid detection. I decided this was the best way to let you know I was here. Besides ration bars aren’t that tasty.”
“How do we know you’re really who you appear to be and this isn’t some sort of trick?” a third ANBU questioned.
This time Iruka recognized the voice immediately. “The same way you know that if any of my students have senbon injuries, more than just your balls will be itching.”
“It’s him. Only that demon king would think those little monsters need to be protected.” Horse, also known as Shiranui Genma, replied helping himself to a bowl of stew.
After Genma’s declaration the others also grabbed a bowl, turned their backs, and began eating.
Iruka waited until they were mostly finished before asking, “Will one of you do me a favor?”
“That’s the real reason you fed us, isn’t it?” asked an ANBU whose mask or voice Iruka didn’t recognize.
“Partially,” Iruka smirked, handing the ANBU a letter. “I’m sure my dear old mother would love to hear how her son is doing.”
“You do realize she’s going to kill you for saying that?” Genma laughed.
“After this mission, I might let it slip to my younger kids how much she’s missing being called ‘Baachan’ since their older brother is out of the village.”
The two unknown ANBU almost choked at Iruka’s last statement. It was common knowledge to refer to the Hokage as “Mother” when they were on covert missions. As part of her personal guards, their ears had experienced the misfortune of being nearby when Naruto called her “Grandma”. They had thought it was just the fox boy being disrespectful again since he’d also called Sandaime “Old Man”. Now, after hearing what they thought was a quiet unassuming chuunin academy teacher and desk worker threaten a higher ranking nin, call the Hokage an old woman, and lure them with food just so he could use them as a messenger service, they weren’t so sure.
“I still can’t believe they let you anywhere near the Academy, much less as a teacher.” Yuugao smiled wryly as she motioned for her ANBU to retreat. “And the elders wonder what happened to the quiet obedient kids Konoha once raised. How far should we stay back, Oni-sensei-sama?”
“Twenty-five feet. I’ll be leaving shortly before sunrise,” Iruka replied, grinning.
Yuugao nodded. “Let’s go, guys. The border isn’t going to patrol itself. Be sure to tell the others not to come within a 25 foot radius of this campsite before sunrise.”
“What’s the point of telling us he is here if he doesn’t want us to watch over him?” Rooster asked as they hopped back into the trees.
“He did it for our benefit. He didn’t want us to get caught in his traps,” Genma explained.
“He’s a chuunin. What’s so bad about his traps?” the unfamiliar ANBU asked.
This time Yuugao answered. “Tenzou, do you remember when Uchiha-sensei disappeared for a week during the last year you were at the Academy?”
“Uchiha-sensei? The one who made us call him Uchiha-sensei even though there were two others at the Academy? Wasn’t he on a classified mission for the Hokage?” the wood user asked.
“No, that’s what they told us while they tried to unseal him. Do you remember the obstacle course we had to run without chakra?” she continued.
“The one where they’d make us touch the imprint tags and channel our chakra so we’d automatically start over if any were detected?”
“That’s the one. Iruka stole some of the tags and used Uchiha-sensei’s clone demonstration to capture his chakra signature. He put the tags on the walls of the Uchiha compound and trapped him inside for a week.
“Couldn’t they see the chakra with their Sharingans?”
“The seals were placed on the bottom of his shoes where no one would think to look for them. Iruka did that as a prank when he was a kid. Can you imagine what he’ll create to protect himself on a mission?”
Iruka waited until he could no longer hear the ANBU talking about him before setting his traps. He made the outer ring twenty five feet from the center of his campsite and the rest at three feet intervals in concentric rings. It may have been overkill, but he didn’t want to take any chances so close to Sound.
It was still dark when Iruka woke up the next morning. He used a few dried leaves to rekindle the fire and heated the remaining stew for breakfast. After cleaning his campsite, Iruka consulted Tsunade’s map and memorized the markers he’d need to quickly cross Rice Field Country. He made sure to place his extra weapons within easy reach just in case he would need them.
“Only one thing left now,” Iruka thought as he took a deep breath and calmly directed chakra to his ears and his fingers. He took another deep breath and placed his chakra covered fingertips in his ears and began to hum. Now that the jutsu was in place it would protect his hearing by filtering volumes above or below certain decibels and frequencies while enhancing his ability to detect natural sounds such as footsteps and breathing. He had to admit it was genius of Neji and Tenten to invent a jutsu just to mute their over- enthusiastic teammate and sensei.
The journey through Sound was quick and uneventful thanks to Tsunade’s map. There was a safe house a full day away so he nibbled on soldier pills and continued moving even after he’d crossed into the next country.
The first thing Iruka noticed when he arrived at Snow Country was the presence of both Cloud and Snow Ninjas. He didn’t feel the same sense of hostility as he did while in Rain, but a feeling of uneasiness remained with him. He delivered his packages and remained at the palace at the insistence of the Fire Daimyo’s youngest daughter. He spent most of the evening regaling the new bride with tales of her home country. He kept his topics general and focused mainly on Tora’s repeated attempts to escape the princess’s mother. Even though Iruka was speaking about mundane subjects, he noticed the Snow noble and his ninja guardians were listening intently and asking very specific questions about the children assigned to the mission and where the cat was captured. Iruka was grateful the princess only had vague memories of the terrain around Konoha and civilian misinformation about the shinobi clans and their abilities as she naively chattered about Fire Country and its military.
The next morning, Iruka bid farewell to his host and accepted an escort to the border of Snow County. He immediately turned southwest and made haste toward Fire Country. He traveled several more hours before making a clone to continue southward while he smeared dirt and animal feces over himself to mask his scent and headed due north towards the safe house near the ocean.
Iruka traveled four hours before finding a cave and taking shelter. His chakra was running low and he needed his clone to last a bit longer. He knew another two hours would give the clone enough time to create a false trail and disappear in a large city on the way to Konoha. Iruka removed his filthy gloves before digging in his pack for a ration bar. He chewed the nutritionally fortified sawdust slowly before slipping into a meditative trance. His eyes snapped opened when the clone dissipated and doppelganger’s memories came rushing back to him. Two of the Snow shinobi along with a tracker from Cloud followed the clone after they separated just to make sure he was truly headed for Konoha. The clone did as instructed and got what appeared to be sloppy drunk before literally disappearing inside a cheap fetish brothel specializing in what appeared to be diseased whores. Iruka didn’t know what was worse, the muck covering his body or the pus filled lesions masking the gender of the whore his clone had chosen. Regardless, the old whatever it was did the trick; Iruka’s pursuers disappeared as soon as it removed its clothing.
Iruka consulted his map before once more donning his dirty gloves and heading northward again. He stopped at the first lake he came to and removed as much muck as he could before dipping into the frigid waters and swimming across it. The next safe house was only two miles away from the other side. Iruka shook as much water off of himself as possible and used chakra to disperse the mud beneath his feet and minimize footprints before heading to the safe house that would put him on the northern route to the Snow/Lightning Country border.
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Another Perfect Wonder