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The Banks Of The River Styx	By : AkashaEmily Category: Naruto > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 914 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Naruto, nor
do I make any money from using their likenesses. I do this for pure
entertainment only.

Warning: This is a SasuNaru work so
that means eventual yoai action. If this offends you
at all then please exit this story now though thank you very much for having a
look. I will not listen to whining later about offensive content- proceed at
your own risk.

The Banks of the River Styx

Chapter 1: The Space Between

Sasuke
felt himself being jostled lightly back to semi-consciousness, both by the
person talking to him in urgent tones and by a sense of movement around him. On
his stomach he lay still, too exhausted to move, too exhausted to even consider the possibility of moving.
Whatever
he was laying on was soft and vaguely warm, lulling him back into inky
blackness where there was no voice telling him to stay awake, where his body
didn�t hurt, where he didn�t have to think about how off everything around him felt.
Something
moved inside him, pacing, a half sensed presence shifting around that almost
made him want to open his eyes and look down at himself to see what was causing
such a sensation.
The
key word here was �almost.�
He
felt himself sigh, only a slight remnant of sound, as he began to drift again.
His body became heavy, sensation receding as he sank deeper into the dark. He
was dying, this he knew, but Sasuke couldn�t scrape together enough emotion to
really care anymore.
His
life was over but still he felt satisfied, peaceful even. He hadn�t been able
to achieve his ultimate goal but he had managed to finally fulfill his duty,
after several long years of torment and hard training. Even after all that, he
hadn�t been able to do it alone.
Damned blonde
idiot. The thought drifted
lazily through the dark, dripping with affection. He felt himself try to smile
but couldn�t make his face move until memory caught up with him, reminding
Sasuke once again just how high a price had been paid for defeating Itatchi.
Naruto..!
The name echoed inside him, filled with sorrow and sadness, his heart swelling
with pain, forcing tears. The emotions gained intensity, binding the Uchiha and
the presence inside him closer as both grieved.
There
were so many things he had wanted to say, so many things that he had wanted to
express but had never known how. His earlier attempts had ended badly, oh so
badly, and had driven the blonde away, had driven them apart. And now it was
too late to say anything.
It
hurt that he would never see his friend again, hurt worst than almost any pain
he had ever experienced, right up there with losing his family.
Actually,
if the laws of the universe truly wanted to be sadistic, all they would have to
do to torture him would be to sit Sasuke down in front of a large TV and replay
those two moments on an endless loop for the rest of eternity.
I miss you�
Bits and pieces came to him then, making his tears fall faster: flashes of hair
the color of the sun, of eyes as blue as a summer sky. Tan skin, a welcoming
smile, a mischievous smirk, a thousand other little details that he had never
noticed until right then, small idiosyncrasies that were always there, that
made Naruto real and vibrant. Some of the images were jumbled, making
interpretation difficult, memories he knew were not his own. They added to the
whole though, making the Naruto in his mind more life-like, as if Sasuke could
reach out and grab hold of his friend if only he could make his stubborn arm,
or what was left of it, move.
He
felt the thing inside him shift again, settling, mourning. Sasuke supposed that
it must be unsettling suddenly having such open space- he had felt the same way
about his old house after the Uchiha clan was massacred. There were no seals to
contain the beast now and, after all that had transpired,
no internal organs to fight with over room, what with Sasuke�s
splattered on the cave floor somewhere. Dimly, the Uchiha knew he should be
bothered by this but, when it feels as if someone had ripped your heart out,
when it feels as if your very soul had died, did having or not having internal
organs really matter anymore �?
�Hey!�
Something grabbed his ankle and tugged, making Sasuke realize that he had
passed out for a few seconds. The spurt of adrenaline the surprise managed to
produce had little effect on his abused body, and so the feeling of alarm that
coursed through him soon faded away, leaving Sasuke back on the fading edge of
awareness again.
��awake!�
The
grip on his ankle shifted and soon the Uchiha felt himself being pulled
backwards and down off the surface he was sprawled on. Hands grabbed him when
enough of his rag-doll like body had been exposed, turned him over onto his
back so his head lolled backward and dangled inches above uneven pavement.
Sasuke caught glimpses of someone�s shins as they carried him, his eye lids
pulled open to half-mast by gravity so he couldn�t shut them even if he tried.
I�m coming.
He wasn�t sure who the thought was for but it probably had to do with the
hallucinations plaguing his mind, distorting and obliterating reality. A smiling
blonde idiot was waving at him, beckoning at him to hurry, pointing to
something off in the distance that only he could see and obviously wanted to
share with Sasuke. It was sunny and warm, the sky overhead the same color as Naruto�s beautiful eyes�
Sasuke
felt his fingers twitch with the desire to wave back at the golden haired
figure, felt a muscle in his leg jump from the urge to run after him.
�No
pulse!�
Naruto
began to turn, that damnably cute pout on his face. Sasuke thought he heard a
vague remark about being a slow poke.
No! Wait!
Sasuke tried to call out, to stall the blonde, but could make no sound. I�m coming! I�m coming, wait! Desperate,
he ran, chasing after his teammate. He ran and forced himself faster, panting
breathlessly but unwilling to stop because Naruto was getting further and
further away.
�Paddles!�
Wait! Sasuke
tried to scream, stumbling but pressing forward, urged on by the large presence
suddenly at his side. They both chased after the blonde, calling out, trying to
get him to slow down, all to no avail.
Naruto! The
Uchiha pumped his legs furiously, putting everything he had into them, going as
fast as he could, one hand outstretched to grab his friend while the other� hand kept a grip on the faltering presence at
his side.
�Clear!�
Don�t leave me behind! Sasuke�s fingers were out
stretched, splayed, frantic to catch in the blonde�s
sleeve.
�Clear!�
Don�t leave me alone! An inch more, just and inch�!
�Clear!�
Let me come with you! It came out an agonized howl from his heart. Finally Sasuke�s fingers managed to close around Naruto�s wrist-
Only to go right through.
Naruto
stopped and turned, fixing Sasuke with a sad smile. �You can�t come yet.� He
reached out and laid his hand solidly against Sasuke�s
chest, ignoring the way the Uchiha was frantically shaking his head.
�� Sasuke doubled over in pain, fighting not to clutch
his chest as something inside it twitched into being. He grabbed at his friend,
unwilling to give up just yet. Take me
with you! He pleaded silently, looking up into blue, blue eyes, the image
of Naruto beginning to blur.
�� I can�t.� The blonde said softly, a hand on the
brunette�s shoulder as Sasuke dropped to his knees in the grass beneath their
feet.
The
pain in his chest doubled- quadrupled- when Sasuke heard that and he could not
prevent the melancholy smile that graced his features. He understood; where ever
Naruto was going, it was not a place for traitors and, as such, Sasuke was not
allowed to go there. Sasuke couldn�t even ask the blonde to save a place for
him since they weren�t heading to a mutual destination. No, Sasuke was sure
that there was a seat somewhere far warmer with his name on it, situated very
close to somebody with a very sharp pitchfork. He had earned such a fate, this
he knew, and so the brunette did not bemoan it.
Though
accepting it didn�t make any of this easier to take since he�d never see Naruto
again after this.
�� I wanted to tell
you! He had to hurry, time was running out and Naruto was fading away. I�m sorry! There were so many things
trying to claw their way out of his throat all at the same time that Sasuke
could only butcher them, cobbling the lot into incoherent rambling. I- Thank you. You saved me. You�re my best
friend. I..I love you� and I failed you. Again. I�m so sorry.
�� He sobbed, giving in and clutching his chest as he
gasped in pain. He kept his eyes wide, though, taking in Naruto�s
look of surprise through his tears, trying to keep everything in focus even as
it all began to dissolve around him.
�� Don�t go� Sasuke wanted to beg as his eyes unfocused, as
his resolve weakened. He reached out blindly, trying one last time to grab hold
of the blonde. He knew it was futile but if there was anything he had learned
after years of knowing Naruto, it was that nothing was impossible.
�� He wanted to tell the blonde to stay, to stay with him,
to not venture any further into the sunny landscape around them. He wanted to
hold the blonde close and never let go because losing the blonde would mean
losing what had made life worth living. Sasuke wanted to rage and scream and
curse, not stopping until he got his way and Naruto promised to remain with him
no matter what!
�� Even if�
Even if it meant condemning him to an eternity of
misery..?
Could
Sasuke really do that? Could he live with himself, knowing that his own hands
had taken paradise away from the most important person in his life?
�� Be happy. The
Uchiha sighed quietly, letting go. Naruto had suffered through enough pain; it
was time to let the blonde be happy. Time to put his selfishness
aside and grow up. Sasuke had said his peace and that was all he really
had wanted, or so he told himself at any rate.
�� It was the only comfort he could hold onto as his eyes
slid shut and lost sight of the blond.
��
He
dreamed, nightmares filled with blood and fire, of
being chased and hunted. Sasuke dreamed of Naruto as well, again chasing after
his friend but this time never being able to catch him or, worse, catching the
blonde only to watch him crumble into dust. He would cry then, sobbing brokenly
in grief, suddenly thrown forcibly back into the memories about how this all
began.
About
a cave filled with shadows and echoing with chanting.
About fire and blood, lots and lots of blood, and
losing himself in a rage.
About Naruto�s still form on
the floor, tied down by chains that cut into the blonde�s flesh.
He
would whimper then, afraid of facing those images, remembering how he had
completely lost control, over the knowledge that in the end he too could reach
the same level of insanity that had driven Itatchi to
slaughter their family.
It
frightened him, what he had been capable of.
Sasuke
had enjoyed going on a rampage, he had enjoyed dishing out retribution, had
enjoyed the carnage he wreaked while avenging his friend.
Itatchi�s
death at that point had just been the icing on a horrific cake.
The
feel of hot, freshly spilled blood on his hands, of flesh tearing under a
demonically powered chidori. Nothing had been able to
stand against him and he had laid waste to everything around him, snuffing out
lives left and right, reveling in the near ecstatic pleasure coursing through
him as he did so. It had fed him, powered him to continue, allowed
him to force the very earth around them all to bend to his will. He had never
felt so invincible, never felt so powerful.
Sasuke
had enjoyed it all and that frightened him to his very core.
And
so he ran, caught in the maze of his memories, trapped in a Hellish prison he
himself had created. Running away from some memories while
running toward others. Running, running, running,
always running. Like an endless loop, images played and replayed, good
times, bad times, all of it flowing together until it was just one big mess.
Until
Sasuke was one big mess; a soul trapped in Purgatory, sentenced to forever
wander in limbo until his savior could call him back.
But
that wasn�t going to happen- would never happen.
Could never happen.
His
would-have-been savior lay somewhere beneath a mountain, miles away from the
village the blonde had loved so much, hopefully still next to whatever remained
of Sasuke�s eviscerated form,
along side the remains of the organization of Akatsuki.
Buried under all that rock, both from the fallen mountain and from the
destroyed demon-container statue, it was unlikely their bodies would ever be
recovered to be given a proper burial, but leveling everything had been the
only way to insure the complete obliteration of Akatsuki.
To
protect Konoha as Naruto had always wanted, done with
the power the Kyuubi container had always been afraid
to harness.
An act of penance, a bid for forgiveness, a step
forward toward salvation.
A
monument to something, though the Uchiha had no idea as to what exactly�
Love..? Came the rumbled suggestion from the dark, reminding him
that though he thought he was alone in limbo, he in fact was not.
Hearing
another voice, assuming it was not a sign of insanity, restored some of the
Uchiha�s missing clarity and sense of self. It served to stabilize his mind
enough so that a semblance of coherency made it through, the awful memories
receding.
Of
course, that did nothing about the good ones now flooding his addled mind.
Immediately he was assaulted with pleasant sensations, with images of his
blonde friend, his vision swamped by eyes a peaceful blue.
Naruto? Sasuke asked, reaching out for those memories and
holding them close, wrapping himself in them like a blanket. Doing so made the
Uchiha able to believe for just a second that his friend was not dead.
For
one long, beautiful moment, the blonde was there with him, alive and vibrant
again. Made real by a thousand smells and sensations, his voice ringing in Sasuke�s ears as Naruto sang out an annoyed greeting. He
was there in the darkness, arms draped around Sasuke�s
shoulders, warmth radiating into the brunette�s back, smelling of sweat and
sun. The illusion was so good that the Uchiha could actually feel Naruto cuddle against his body, the
blonde once again given form and life. It was wonderful, heart-wrenchingly
wonderful, and Sasuke felt tears well in his eyes and flow down his cheeks.
I love you!
He sobbed, pressing the heels of his palms against his eyes and trying to
remain still. He had wanted to tell Naruto for so long, so very long, but he
had always held the words in, letting them die in his throat before he could
confess.
Naruto�s
arms tightened around him, pulling him close in an intimate gesture, small nose
nudging against Sasuke�s ear. Warm breath fanned over
Sasuke�s neck, lips ghosting over his skin.
I want this.
Sasuke felt his breath catch in his chest. I
want this but�but� He had made up his mind to let Naruto go, to let the
blonde be happy and rest after such a life filled with torment. He wanted to
keep that resolve.
Hands
ran up over his chest, pinning him against the body behind him, not stopping
until they made him gasp.
He
had made up his mind�! Sasuke bit his
lip, fighting a whimper, fighting the urge to give in and fall on the
temptation pressing against his back.
Naruto�s
hands changed tactics; one headed north while the other went south. The blonde
began to attack the brunette�s neck, little kisses at first them
quick nips at Sasuke�s skin. The hand on his chest
found a nipple and began to tease while the other slid beneath the waistband of
the Uchiha�s pants.
No� Sasuke�s moaned, arching away, trying to untangle himself
from the blonde. He had made up his mind, had decided to let Naruto go..!
Don�t make this any harder!
His
heart was not listening, disregarding the decision that had obviously been made
without its consent. It smashed his resolve to pieces, grinding it under heel
as Naruto�s hands worked on his body, eliciting moans
and pants. All too soon, the Uchiha was overloaded, drowning in sensations yet
starving, demanding more, his body moving of its own accord as he turned around
and tackled the blonde.
Sasuke
had never been good at resisting temptation. He knew it, his parents had known
it, Itatchi had known
it.� The phrase �impulse control� had not
been added to young Sasuke�s vocabulary until around
the age of four, much to his father�s annoyance: Uchihas
were encouraged to perfect emotional control at an early age, and contrary to
popular belief, Sasuke Uchiha had not managed to completely master this
particular ability. It was why he had to remain emotionally distant; hidden
under all those layers of self control was a needy, passionate, and highly
emotional Uchiha just waiting to get out.
This
Naruto, real or delusion, had set that part of Sasuke free, with complete
disregard for the Uchiha�s starved libido.
He
fell on the blonde like some ravaging beast, forcing the other male backwards
onto the floor, their lips pressed ruthlessly against one another�s. Hands
wrapped around his waist, gripping his hips, fingers splaying over his suddenly
over-heated and sensitive flesh, dipping below the waistband of his pants. The
sensation triggered years of repressed desire and lust to awaken, bubbling to
the surface, spilling out through his lips, and pour into the blonde beneath
him. For several long blissful minutes, Sasuke lost himself in that moment, let his hands roam over bronzed skin and blonde
hair, the blonde rolling them both to lay on their sides. He felt a tongue
tease along his bottom lip, asking silently for permission as a cautious hand
dipped deeply into his pants and brushed through warm dark curls. The Uchiha
gasped as searching fingers found what they were after, throwing his head back
to pant as gentle touches hastened the hardening of his flesh.
The
brunette had wanted to do this with the real Naruto. He had fantasized about
it, late at night, indulging in his dreams what he couldn�t bring himself to do
in reality. It happened rarely, and when he did manage to dream about Naruto,
he slept well despite the erotic content, as if the blonde�s presence acted as
a talisman against the nightmares that normally plagued Sasuke�s
sleep. Such a phenomenon led to other thoughts, like, what would it be like to
sleep next to Naruto? How would it feel to cuddle up next to him as he fell
asleep, or wrap his arms around him? Would Naruto be warm to the touch? Would
he return the embrace?
Sometimes
Sasuke didn�t dream of anything sexual. Sometimes his fantasies were tame
beyond belief, a subconscious bid by his anxious mind for comfort. Some nights
he dreamed of simply falling asleep surrounded by his teammate�s vibrant body,
with tan arms wrapping around his pale form, his nose pressed against warm
flesh and filled with Naruto�s scent�
�Naruto
lay limp in his lap, head lolling bonelessly as Sasuke�s sob-wracked body shook them both. The Uchiha had
gathered his friend in his arms, hoping to find some trace of life in Naruto.
The blonde�s body was already cooling, warmth draining away with his blood as
the liquid oozed out all over the stone floor and mingled with Sasuke�s, adding to the already large puddle. Vacant blue
eyes stared up at the Uchiha, unwavering in their accusatory glare no matter
how many tears Sasuke shed. The salty drops dripped down over the blonde�s
whisker marks, trailing away to disappear under his jaw line, clearing away
some of the grime from Naruto�s now pale cheeks.
Awkwardly, ignoring the way his left arm- well what remained of his left arm-
refused to facilitate in the action, Sasuke clutched his friend to him, trying
to suppress a moan and failing. He bit his bottom lip and pressed his nose into
the skin of the blonde�s neck, ignoring the smell of death rolling off the
body.��
All
at once, the fires of desire and lust were snuffed out. Sasuke realized he was
crying again, resting his head against the fake Naruto�s
chest, sobbing brokenly.� This wasn�t
real, none of it was real. His Naruto was gone, gone to a place where Sasuke
could not follow- had no right to
follow. Naruto was dead and this was all a lie, a pathetic attempt at finding
comfort and another example of his own weakness.
He
withdrew from the blonde and curled up in a ball, hands over his ears, shaking
and sobbing. Sasuke didn�t have the heart to push the fake away no matter how
much pain its continued presence caused him.
It�s not real!
He reminded himself harshly, heart constricting in his chest. It�s not real! He�s dead! I got him killed
and he�s dead!
So
preoccupied, filled with guilt and grief, the Uchiha paid no attention to the
tan arms that wrapped around his huddled frame. He didn�t feel the soothing circles
being rubbed into his back, didn�t feel himself being
gathered up and held and pressed against a tan chest.
In
his mind he was back with the real, dead, Naruto, clutching the other to his
chest, crying for him, heedless of the danger still around him.
He
did not feel the warmth radiating off his would-have-been lover.
But
he did feel the chill of a blade as it pierced through him, into Naruto�s corpse, making him jerk in surprise at finding
both it and his body now joined. It speared through him, that absolute coldness
creeping inside him, making him shake all the harder. It robbed him of all the
warmth generated earlier, took away all that momentary happiness he had deluded
himself into enjoying.
It
made him feel dead inside and in a some ways, made
everything better. Being dead inside meant he didn�t have to feel, didn�t have
to wade through all the emotions he didn�t know how to handle. Huddled over
himself, trying futilely to protect his already much abused body from any more
emotional trauma, Sasuke realized he didn�t want to feel anything anymore. All
these memories inside his head, all this pain, it was tearing him to shreds!
The good, the bad- all of it was destroying him, eating away at his psyche,
leaving him a mindless wreck on the floor of his own mind. Already he could
feel himself slipping away, gradually being pulled down into darker and darker
depths, losing pieces of himself all over the place�
He
didn�t want to feel anymore because it hurt too much.
Yet
it hurt even more not to feel anything.
No
matter what you did, one way or another they always got you, coming or going.
Pressed
against the chest of what amounted to a doll made in the image of his dead best
friend, Sasuke Uchiha lay like a broken toy and wondered if he would be allowed
to die any time soon or if he would simply go insane first.

Thank you very much for
reading. I hope you enjoyed it and also that you check back in for the next
chapter. Constructive criticism is always welcome.
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The Banks Of The River Styx