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Naruto Shit-On-You-Then: The Curse Evolves	By : c0p13r Category: Naruto > General Views: 33163 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I don't own 'Naruto' and I make no money off this fic

Chapter List
- 6
- 7
- 8
A traitor amongst us?! I can’t believe it was you!
~~~
            Sasuke’s wrath was swift and terrible, and the Narutards never saw it coming. It was a simple summoning jutsu: a telephone call to ‘Catch a Predator’. Like a bat out of hell, Chris Hansen came to Konoha and immediately set the bait for the pedos that ran rampant within. One of the first to be caught is Haruno Kizashi.
            “What are you doing here?” Hansen asks in his perfected feigned confusion.
            Kizashi, sitting on the stool he was told to sit on, clears his throat. “Well, my daughter was chatting to this little girl on-line about how they should have sex, how the little… little, young… deliciously underaged girl should ride my… her meat stick. I came to tell the little girl not to! She’s much too young to let me rip through her hymen.”
            Hansen glances through the bag that Kizashi brought, and out come the condoms. “What are these for?”
            “Well, if they were going to,” Kizashi says while proudly puffing out his chest, “I figure they should be safe.”
            “Safe from what? They’re both girls.”
            “Yeah, but I have aids.” Kizashi pauses, realizes his blunder, and snaps his fingers angrily. “Argh! Damn, I done goofed!”
            “Take care of this,” Hansen says to the security guards now moving in.
            “You can’t do this!” Kizashi screams. “I’m gonna plow Naruto’s mom in ‘Of Jinchuriki and Uzumaki’ rather than him and Kushina plowing my daughter and wife! No!”
            The bullet bursts through his brains from the guard’s gun, and then his wrists are put in handcuffs. “You’re under arrest, sir.”
~~~Meanwhile, at the base of the Narutards~~~
            “They got Sai!” Choza screams as he runs in, his belly flopping this way and that.
            “Sai is loyal,” Guy assures him with a thumbs-up. “He’ll let his asshole be torn open by a log before he sells us out!”
            “No! Ever since he got that seal removed that prevented him from deep-throating, he sings like a canary! He even drew them a picture of what you’ve done to the thousands of boys you’ve molested, Grand Pedo!”
            “I did not molest those boys!” Iruka refutes swiftly and surely with a swipe of his arm through the air. “I loved them…! And then buried them alive so that they could never tell the police how hard and fast and goo-ily I loved them!” He sits down at the table and thumps it with the bottom of his fist. Growling softly, he runs a hand over his head. Tears start to well up in his eyes. “So many brave men… dying for doing what they love: little boys!” He looks up at his comrades, tears now spilling down his cheeks. “What is wrong with this world? Gays can marry, but I must be shamed for sniffing my fingers after helping a little boy wipe his tushy?!”
            Guy nods solemnly. “Justice eludes a corrupt world. Sasuke has corrupted it by making men into women. Such a disgrace.” He gives a sad thumbs-up. “I haven’t washed this thumb since last I helped Lee wipe after a ferocious doody.”
            Next to him, Lee hangs his head and tries not to weep from nostalgia. To comfort him, Guy holds his hand and reminds him of how proud he was of him that day. “No matter how much it stretched you… you kept on pushing.”
            “Guy-sensei,” sobs Lee.
            As Lee and Guy begin to tongue fuck each other’s mouths, Shino walks to Iruka. “Sasuke will be here soon. The bugs I have planted in the children have told me.” He leans down to Iruka. “Most of our pedophile forces have been destroyed. We are all that is left. Luckily, when being raped to death by a bullet skull-fucking him, Sai didn’t get a chance to tell them where we are. We can hide for a little bit, but…”
            Iruka clenches his fists. “The only ‘but’s I like to talk about belong to little boys!”
            “Sasuke has Orochimaru’s help to track. We have no chance of hiding.”
            Finally, Iruka turns his frown upside down. “Naruto has more people who wanna suck his sphincter still than you’d suppose. Sasuke won’t find us, because he will be alone.”
            “How is that possible?”
            “I told you, didn’t I? We have our best boys on the case to handle Sasuke’s tranny army.”
~~~Meanwhile, at the home of Naruto~~~
            With Hinata thoroughly trounced on the floor and Boruto slowly being weaned off of a picture of Sasuke’s cock to a picture of his father’s, Naruto worries. And when he is worried, he has gas. He paces back and forth, stopping only to fart out tiny squeakers. “Sasy-chan has always been there for me, ya know? Calling me a loser, a turd, incompetent, a failure? He’s like a brother to me, believe it!” He looks in a mirror, staring sadly at the woman’s face looking back. “But Iru-chan… always loved me… for me. He molested me when I didn’t have a father who would, who wiped my anus when there was no toilet paper to keep me clean and fresh down there!” He slumps forward, his huge titties swaying in his tube top to make hetero readers feel confused about themselves. “Ero-Sennin… what would you do?”
            Jiraiya’s face materializes in Naruto’s brain. You already know! I’d fuck you senseless as a girl! And then as a boy!
            Naruto smiles sadly. “I miss the days when you would molest me and call it training. Three years of training… and all I learned how to do was make the Rasengan bigger.” Sobbing, he wipes his nose on his arm. Squatting, his firm and round ass cheeks stretch out his panties, the outline of his labia visible beneath the thin, smooth fabric of Victoria’s Secret. To fill him, you’d need only nudge aside the crotch of the panties to find his vagina and asshole – both so smooth and easily accessible – for your swollen member. Yeah, that’s what you want, isn’t it? A guy who looks like a girl so you can’t be called gay.
            Jiraiya gives you a nod of approval, saying “If you can’t see the wiener, how can they call you gay?”
~~~Meanwhile, at the base of the SasukGays~~~
            Sure enough, like all other times, Iruka proves himself inept and worthless, this time by placing his trust in Konohamaru, Udon, Ebisu and Moegi (who is only there for moral support). The team of Konohamaru was caught… immediately. Now they were fixed on their knees, waiting for their fate as Orochimaru swings a baseball bat around.
            “You think you can put a stop to us? You are so going to regret fucking crossing me. Fuck yeah, you are. There’s a new world order, and it is really very simple, even if you’re fucking stupid, which you may be. I know that it a big cock to swallow, but swallow it, you damn well will. And that new world order is this: your penises… are now Sasy-chan-kun’s vaginas!”
            Konohamaru silently stares forward, trembling with fear. Udon sniveles and Moegi begins to period all over herself. Ebisu tells them to be strong before a dildo is forced into his mouth to shut him up.
            “For crossing us, you small-dicked-not-vaginas or too-much-vagina…” Orochimaru stares at Meogi for that. “I’m gonna beat the holy hell outta one of you. But how to decide?” He grins suddenly. “I got an idea…” He goes up to Ebisu, pokes him with the tip of his bat, and then says, “Donald…” He moves to Moegi, pokes her, and says, “Duck…” Now to Konohamaru… “picked his…” Udon. “butt.” Konohamaru. “How many…” Moegi to keep it random. “feathers…” Now Ebisu again. “did…” Then Moegi. “he…” Finally, Konohamaru. “pluck?” Orochimaru keeps his bat still as he waits.
            Konohamaru, still trembling, barely regards him and his barb-wired bat. Then, he answers. “Two… hundred-thousand.”
            Orochimaru stares, then grins, and points. “One.” To Moegi. “Two.” Ebisu: “Three.”
~~~Meanwhile, at the base of the Narutards~~~
            Iruka sits at the table in typical anime contemplation. (I won’t describe it; you know what I mean) The pedophiles of Konoha, once safe and snug, were being hunted down outside this roach-infested hole, treated like the scum of the Earth. How could the love for little boys draw such disdain?
            His teeth clench as a nervous sweat rolls down his face. “Damn Sasuke.”
            Lee carefully rubs Iruka’s shoulders, knowing his sensei is watching. He casually looks over and sees Guy huffing and puffing while a raging boner struggles to rip through his spandex. “We can still win, Iruka. The Springtime of Youth…”
            “Oh, to holy fuck with your Springtime of Youth!” Iruka shrieks, batting Lee away with the back of his hand. “Take that Springtime of Youth and shove it up Sasuke’s ass!” He then looks desperate. “Do it! Please! Maybe that’ll stop him!”
            “Relax,” says Guy, wheeling over. “We’re safe here. Just one-by-one, we’ll snag little boys like in that movie ‘It’… which was basically ‘Stand By Me’ but with a clown instead of a dead body, a menstrual cycle instead of a story about puking, and cheesy jump-scares instead of smoking kids.”
            All at once, Choji barrels into the room, huffing and puffing, Shino at his side. “Father! Iruk-chan! It’s… it’s Sasy-chan! He found us!”
            “What?!” Iruka jumps up with a gas from his ass. “How did he do it?!”
            “I can’t tell you that,” Shino says. “Why? Because a kunai lodged itself in my back… all the way through my heart.” He falls over dead.
            An explosion takes out the roof of the basement hideout of the Narutards. As Lee, Guy, Choza and Choji cower in fear, Iruka stands firm, even as Sasuke appears from the drifting trailers of debris. “I found you… you sick boy-forker.”
            Iruka clenches his fists, but keeps his cool. “It seems this clash is finally upon us. You may think you caught us unawares…” Immediately, he enters a fighting stance. “But get ready for a good asshole plowing!... to your asshole instead of Naruto’s!”
            “It’s Naru-chan while I’m around, Iruk-chan.” Sasuke leaps down and squares off with his former teacher. “It’s about time I…” He licks his lips. “… take you to school.”
            “It’s a hundred years too early for you to talk to me that way, kuso!”
            “You’re more delusional than the kids you drug if you think you stand even the tiniest chance against me, Iruk-chan.”
            “That is your flaw,” Iruka says, a glint in his eye. “You think I plan to fight you on a level playing field. Sasy-chan… is indeed an adorable name.”
            Sasuke’s eyes squint suspiciously.
            “But it can hardly stand up to… Iruky-chin!”
            At once, Sasuke is blown to the wall, the SUPER KAWAII~ness of it catching him off guard. Gasping, he looks up just in time to get another rush of ‘Iruky-chin!’ He crumbles under the weight of how cute it is to hear. As planned, the Narutards back him up, cheering ‘Iruky-chin’ while summoning yaoi fangirls to also cheer and giggle and ‘ship’ Iruky-chin pairings with young little boys. “Iruky-chin and Naru-chan are so KAWAII~” they sing. “I love when Iruky-chin gently thrusts his manhood into Naru-chan’s anal orifice!” “I love the ones where Naru-chan convinces Sasy-chan to join in afterschool naughtiness! Banzai shota yaoi!”
            A passerby above ponders why shota yaoi is wrong, but straight shota is sexy as fuck… It’s because it’s a boy becoming a man with a sexy, naughty bitch, that’s why. Besides, the shota in straight shota is always bigger than twelve inches, so what’s it matter? Thanks, Narutards!
            Sasuke pants heavily. Almost defeated, he shrinks under Iruka’s shadow; Iruka is sweating and slightly out of breath, but he must keep his composure, must keep strong! “There was a time,” he wheezes, “when I would’ve chosen you over Naruto, you snake-then-hawk fucking faggot.”
            Looking up with his dumbass eyes, Sasuke endures another blow. “You… are too lax… Iruk-chan.”
            “Sasy-chan/Naru-chan 4-eva!”
            It isn’t much, but it’s enough to break the barrage and turn the tables. Iruka only has time to widen his eyes as he hears the slaughter behind him. His fanbase was killed, and one stood amongst the carnage. Slowly, Iruka turns to see Choza, in a pool of blood, crumbled at Choji’s feet.
            “Son? Gck! Why?”
            Choji snickers. “Of course I would be a SasuGay! With all the men transformed into girls, mine will be the biggest dick in the village at a whopping two inches, second only to Sasy-chan’s forty-eight inches! With such a small cock and huge tits…” He juggles them in his hand. “I don’t even need to be transformed! This was the only way, Father, for me to make the Amikichi clan proud and strong.”
            “But… but…!”
            “Good point,” Choji says to his dad. “BUTT!!” He squats over his dad and drops his pants. Choza gasps, manages a “NO!”, and then gets his whole head lodged up Choji’s asshole. Choji grunts as he flexes his rectum to smother his flailing father until he stills. Choji has won!
            Iruka feels the overwhelming urge to defeat the fat fuck, but to turn his back on Sasy-chan meant death. Wisdom conquering rage, he stays his ground. “I guess… Gulp! That we do this with our fists.”
            “Your next mistake.” Sasuke takes out his schlong, twirling it like a lasso. “You think I need my fists.”
~~~
Uh-oh! Sasuke has the upper hand, and things are looking bad for Iruka! How will he get out of this one, or will the SasuGays triumph of the Uchiha? Choji has made his play. Will he also get a chance to plow Kushina like Kizashi will in ‘Of Jinchuriki and Uzumaki’? He’s gonna plow her good; it’s happenin’…
- 6
- 7
- 8
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Naruto Shit-On-You-Then: The Curse Evolves