Obsession | By : Infek Category: Naruto > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 1875 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0 |
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. Note: ANBU Core is not an existing branch of ANBU but only used to benefit this story. |
every finger in the room is pointing at me
I wanna spit in their faces
then I get afraid of what that could bring
I got a bowling ball in my stomach
I got a desert in my mouth
figures that my COURAGE would choose to sell out now
I’ve been raising up my hands
drive another nail in
just what GOD needs one more victim
every day I crucify myself
nothing I do is good enough for you
and my HEART is sick of being in chains
you’re just an empty cage kid if you kill the bird
please be save me I CRY
Crucify – Tori Amos [Adapted]
Chapter VII There Is No Life Without Resentment
“Hinata-sama,” Neji yelled. She finished her move and felt warmth spreading over her cheeks as Naruto cheered for her victory. Even though she was in a relationship with Kiba, she still blushed every time her first crush gave her any type of attention. The past few months had been very hard on Naruto, she knew, since Akatsuki had come forth more aggressively, intent on extracting the Kyuubi. They had even been into Konoha and almost succeeded in catching him. Luckily, Kakashi had stepped in to save his former pupil although everyone could still vividly remember Naruto’s loud protests afterwards that he could have handled it himself – the fact that he had been unconscious conveniently forgotten. She smiled lightly at him as a form of support before running to her cousin.
“Neji-niisan, is everything alright?” she asked as she saw the anger in his eyes.
“Urgent clan-meeting with the elders. They asked me to come and bring you back to the compound immediately.”
“Did they say why?” They both took off at a high speed.
Neji shook his head but he knew what it was about. There could be no doubt about it. He was turning eighteen in just two months. His heart thumped in his chest almost to the point of hurting. He didn’t want to leave Itachi, the man he loved. But they had both known this day would come. Arriving in their clan’s compound, they made their way to the meeting-hall where the elders were already waiting. They both bowed deeply and after receiving a nod in permission, sat down on their knees.
Hiashi stood up and gave his daughter a proud smile. “As you all know, Hinata is in a relationship with Inuzuka Kiba, something we all strongly support since it is the perfect way to strengthen our bonds between our two clans and I’m therefore happy to announce that when Hinata becomes eighteen, she will not only celebrate her birthday but also her marriage to Inuzuka-kun.” Neji stared at Hinata from his eye-corners and saw the initial shock on her face before a relieved smile formed on her lips. A surge of hate flooded through him, so similar to how he felt towards her during their first Chūnin-exams. All because she was the daughter of the first son, she was allowed to be in a relationship with whoever she wanted, as long as it was someone from an influential clan in Konoha. Neji hung his head, briefly closing his eyes. He should stop deceiving himself. Even if he had been of the Sōke, they still would never support a relationship with Uchiha Itachi, another man.
“Neji-kun’s eighteenth birthday is just two months away.” Hiashi’s voice broke through his musings. “We have agreed that his future wife will be Yazawa Kaoru, a distant relative of ours. She will be arriving shortly in Konoha and you will meet her next week, Neji-kun.”
Neji’s heart felt as if someone had smashed a hammer in it. “May I have permission to leave?” he managed to utter, his voice sounding strangely distant to his own ears.
Some of the clan-elders frowned at his disrespectful reaction. “Aren’t you glad that we have chosen such a suitable partner for you?” one of them asked.
Neji’s hands clenched around his knees, his knuckles showing. Straightening his head, he faced them.
“No, I’m not.” He didn’t give any further reason, knowing that they would see his answer as just another one of his rebellious fits but he could never tell them that he was already involved with someone else because they would demand to know a name. If he had to be dragged down, he wouldn’t drag Itachi with him. He deserved much better than that. Neji did remember how Itachi had said that he had no intention of letting him go and it was this that made him express his discontent towards the clan-elders. He believed every word Itachi had said.
“How dare you,” Hiashi nearly yelled. He had known Neji would do this. But would he never learn that struggling was useless, that he was powerless against them, him? Neji gave him a challenging glare and Hiashi had enough. His left-hand flexed and he straightened its index-finger. Neji grabbed his scalp, trying his hardest not to scream out in pain but it was breath-taking and all thoughts stopped as his brain cells were stretched under the all-consuming pressure. The pain continued and he fell down on the floor, curling up in a ball.
“Otou-san,” Hinata screamed, grabbing Neji’s shoulder. Seeing him helpless on the floor, on the brink of tears made her want to cry herself. All she could be glad for was that when she claimed her position as Hyūga clan leader, she could abolish the curse-seal and reunite the Sōke and Bunke.
“I think he’s been punished enough, Hiashi-san,” one of the elders commented. She didn’t want to admit that it made her sick to her stomach to see a relative being tortured to later on bend him to their will. Hiashi released and sat back down.
“Have you learned your lesson, Neji-kun?”
Neji lay down for a few more seconds, trying to find the strength to sit up. Supporting himself on shaking arms, he stared at the elders. “Torture me all you want, but I will never be grateful for not getting a choice.”
Hinata closed her eyes as she heard this but quickly grabbed his hands, knowing what was to come and Neji turned his head in surprise but then gave her a small smile before his mouth opened and a scream of anguish filled the room. Hinata laid him down and held his head in her lap not knowing how else to comfort him. She pleaded with her eyes, hoping to convince her father to stop this.
The screaming continued and then a deathlike silence ruled. Neji kept lying still and Hinata feared that the curse-seal had done harm but after a searching look with her Byakugan, she couldn’t see any clear damage and his heart was beating, much too fast but he was still alive. In those two times, the seal had been activated for more than a minute in total and Hinata knew enough about it; had it been any longer, Neji could have suffered severe brain-damage or worse. He could have actually died.
Neji lay there, trying to warp his mind around the dull pain, hoping it would go away. Soft hands were stroking his head and he just wished so badly that it were Itachi’s. In the two years they had been together, he never needed him more than he did now. He got up, trembling on his legs and just stumbled out of the room, not even bothering with any formality. Ignoring the worried glances on the way to his room, he reached it and fell down on the ground the moment the door slid shut behind him. He was sweating profusely but couldn’t make himself go to the bathroom just yet. Wrapping his arms around his knees, he tried not to cry. He didn’t even want to think about the moment he would have to face Itachi and tell them their time together was over. This is just a temporary call of bad luck. Itachi will get me out. He refused to let his pride get in the way and just relied on him, hoping and believing that he would have a solution. Two more days until he saw him again. Two more days of worrying and hoping.
[-]
Sitting quietly in a corner, Neji sipped his sake, watching with tired eyes how the others were laughing loudly, almost rolling over in their seat as Naruto and Sasuke had another one of their arguments. He didn’t even pay attention to what they were saying, not caring in the slightest. Hinata had been glancing over at him constantly and he knew how worried she was about him but he refused to acknowledge her. Not because he hated her, no. He had quickly realized that it was just a brief flash from the past reappearing but he didn’t want her to comfort him, only telling him that things would be okay when they clearly weren’t. The past day, he had been tossed from one extreme to the other, one moment believing that Itachi would have an escape, the next trying to prepare himself for his pending marriage. He swallowed the sake and cringed at the bitter taste. What was it they said? If the sake tastes sweet, it means all is well. If bitter, something is deeply troubling you. Regardless, he swallowed another mouthful.
Kiba suddenly yelled at Naruto and Sasuke to come sit down. The two glared at each other before reluctantly dropping in their seats. Kiba stood up with a grin, giving Hinata a wide smile before looking at the others.
“Just wanted to tell you all that in a year me and Hinata will be getting married!” There was a deadly silence before nearly everyone started screaming and yelling their congratulations. Hinata blushed, smiling shyly but giving Kiba’s hand a firm squeeze. Neji caught her gaze and for her, lifted his cup and bowed his head. Kiba noticed and then he opened his mouth again, telling everyone to shut up.
“Oi, listen up! I totally forgot, man,” he said to Neji, “but everyone, Neji is getting married as well. Congrats, dude!”
Neji’s head jerked up before he slumped in his seat. Everyone was confused for a moment, since they had never seen him with a girl. As they saw Neji looking painfully defeated, realization set in. It was an arranged marriage. Some hesitantly congratulated him but Neji held up his hand.
“Don’t. Just… don’t.” Kiba questioningly looked at his future wife who just motioned him to sit down again.
“It can’t be that bad, Neji. I’m sure that with your looks you can get any woman to do whatever you want,” Naruto tried. The comment made some people smile slightly. Shikamaru stared closely at Neji, shaking his head minutely. Itachi’d better have a plan.
“When will this youthful union take place?” Lee exclaimed much too enthusiastically for the situation. Subtlety never was his forte.
Neji sighed. “In two months.” He stood up and laid some money on the table, taking his sake-bottle with him. He had always looked down on people that tried to drown their sorrows in alcohol but tonight, it seemed highly tempting. Everyone he passed looked unsure, all wondering what to say to him. He had almost made it to the door but a hand on his shoulder stopped him. He turned his head slightly and saw Naruto smiling brightly.
“You’re going to be okay, Neji. There are worse things than being married to a beautiful woman.”
Neji looked at him, almost not believing what he had just heard. “I’m going to be okay? I’m not going to be okay when they had to activate my curse-seal to convince me to get married, when I will be forced to spend the rest of my life with someone I don’t even know!” He screamed and everyone’s eyes were on him but he didn’t care. How was he supposed to be okay when leaving the only person he had trusted his soul to behind?
Naruto held up his hands in a shushing motion. “Just try and see this from the bright side. There’s not much you can do.” Since you have the curse-seal. The words were unspoken but they might as well could have been shouted.
Neji’s hands were flexing in rage and he could barely contain himself. He wanted to wipe that pitying look on Naruto’s face off, he wanted to kill him. Shikamaru quickly stepped up to him as he felt his murder-intent radiating off of him, ready to intervene if necessary.
“You’re a bastard, Naruto. Even if you’re not Hokage in title, everyone knows you might as well could have been. You swore to me that you would help me. Don’t make promises anymore if you don’t intend on keeping them. It will only make people hate you.” The tone was so soft but so much more vicious than when he was yelling. He gave Naruto one last glance nearly spilling over with hate and rage before storming off.
Shikamaru thought it safer to follow him, lest he should do something stupid.
“Shikamaru,” Naruto stopped him. “I seriously can’t prevent him from getting married. Why is he so mad?”
“Remember what you said to him, Naruto. You promised you’d change the Hyūga for him…” Naruto watched Shikamaru walk out of the door and then turned to the others only to be met with many disappointed glances. Only Sasuke gave him a confident smirk, conveying that their opinion didn’t matter. It didn’t matter though and he sat down sulking. Perhaps what Neji and Shikamaru said held some truth.
“Neji, you shouldn’t be doing this,” Shikamaru sighed as he held the sake-bottle out of reach. Neji glared at him which didn’t seem all that threatening when he was drunk. Falling down on the grass, he heaved a deep sigh.
“Give me that bottle, Shikamaru. You should know I have plenty of reasons to get drunk.” He bitterly laughed. “Too many reasons, probably.”
Shikamaru handed over the bottle which was eagerly grabbed. He lay down next to Neji and lit a cigarette. His eyes searched the sky and noticed the many stars. He still preferred clouds, though.
“Has Itachi talked with you about having a plan?”
Silence stretched on until he heard Neji swallowing some sake. “No.” It hurt to see Neji like this and Shikamaru realized once more how lucky he was to have been given the choice on who he wanted to spend his life with.
“What if there is no plan? What if I’m marrying some girl in two months?” Neji stared at Shikamaru, eyes wide with despair. “I can’t leave him. I don’t want to leave him.” He had his hands clenched tightly around the little bottle and Shikamaru softly released it from his grasp before it broke in his hands.
“You know Itachi better than I do but he does seem to be the type to always have a plan ready.”
Neji shook his head, his loose hair falling around. “But then why hasn’t he told me anything about it!? We spend nearly all of our time together and he constantly showed and told me that he wouldn’t let me go but…” He breathed in through his nose, trying to calm himself before he started crying. “But I’m getting married in two months, Shikamaru. What can he change in two months?”
Shikamaru didn’t want to tell him, but he himself doubted Itachi could still execute a plan that actually had a chance of succeeding. If Neji hadn’t had the curse-seal, they could have eloped and become missing-nin but no one in all of the Countries seemed to know how to remove the Hyūga’s curse-seal. All Neji could do was have faith in Itachi while waiting for his return.
“When is he coming back?”
“Tomorrow.”
Shikamaru decided he’d best be truthful to Neji although he knew it could crush the last bit of hope he still had. “Wait until you’ve talked to him. If he doesn’t have a plan, you’ll have to learn to accept that you and Itachi will have to end the relationship and that you’ll be married to a girl you don’t love.” Neji lifted his head and closed his eyes as Shikamaru stated his options.
“I’ll die if I have to get married to her, you know?” Normally, Shikamaru would have scoffed at hearing such a melodramatic answer but Neji spoke with such conviction that it was hard to let it slide, to not believe him.
He sank back down on the grass and took a drag from his cigarette. “I know.”
[-]
Hiashi heard someone loudly walking or rather stumbling in the hallways. He briefly activated his Byakugan. Neji… He softly stepped out of his quarters to find his nephew leaning against the walls, his cheeks blazing. The smell of alcohol penetrated his nose and a frown formed on his features.
“Neji.” White eyes stared back at him.
“Yes, Hiashi-sama,” Neji whispered.
“Have you been drinking?”
Neji smirked and he snorted a laugh. “Yes, Hiashi-sama.” A hand landed on his cheek, the brute force behind it making him stumble against the wall.
“You’d better stop your pitiful protest or you’ll suffer more than this.”
Neji gave him a daring glare. “You can hit me but I’ll still detest marrying that girl, I’ll still detest the Sōke and I’ll hate you.”
Hiashi sank down on his knees until they were at eye-level. “Hate me all you want since I don’t care. But you’ll still obey to my wishes because you don’t have a choice. The stupidest thing you could have done, you did. A Bunke should never fight his fate.”
Neji started laughing under his breath, the sound gradually getting louder. Hiashi refused to show his confusion and smacked him again, although it did nothing to make him stop.
“Was it your wish then that I slept with another man? That I had a cock shoved in my ass and loved it? That I cried and screamed for more, begging him to take me harder and deeper and faster? You may have the rest of my miserable life but the past few years were mine!” Neji had to admit that the alcohol in his system had loosened up his tongue but he would never take back his words since they were the truth. “Let’s see how much my bride will love me when I tell her I’d rather die than have sex with her.”
Hiashi’s mouth had fallen open as he heard Neji’s confession before he stormed after him, holding him by the neck. “Your days of being a whore are over. I’ll drug you if need be to get you to say ‘I do’ and to make you bed Kaoru. Don’t think I haven’t prepared myself for your resistance.”
Neji had trouble breathing since his neck was grabbed so tightly and he clawed at the hands holding it. He fell down as he was released, deeply inhaling fresh air and rubbing the abused skin softly. Hiashi walked away, satisfied that Neji had learned his lesson.
Neji was left behind in the hallway, lying on the floor and clenching his hands to prevent crying.
[-]
“Ano, baa-chan. You know Hyūga Neji is getting married, right?” Tsunade nodded, wondering where Naruto was going with this.
“Isn’t there anything we can do to prevent it? Neji’s really not happy about it.” Naruto scratched the back of his head, indicating that he really didn’t know if there would be a way out of this marriage for Neji. Tsunade shook her head, all the while signing one mission-report after another. Shizune would be yelling at her later that she was slacking off but it wouldn’t be the first time.
“An arranged marriage is something that is decided between the two respective clans. Unless someone is killed, I can’t interfere.”
Naruto’s face lit up. “Getting killed, huh?” Tsunade’s eyebrow twitched as she imagined all the stupid scenarios he would have come up with.
“If you even dare to lay a hand on Hyūga Neji of his future bride, you can forget about becoming a Hokage.”
Naruto’s face fell. “So there’s really not anything we can do? Can’t we change the rules for the curse-seal, that they aren’t allowed to activate it anymore?”
Tsunade groaned. “Where are you going with this?”
Naruto quickly explained the promise he had made to Neji when he was thirteen but he talked slower and slower as he saw the expression on Tsunade’s face. The next moment, the back of his head was firmly hit and he cowered a bit.
“Baka! Did you even know about the specific clan-regulations or anything like that? You can’t just go around and make promises that involve one of the largest and most important clans in Konoha.”
“But what’s the problem? You’re the Hokage, the most powerful person in the village.”
Tsunade rubbed her brow to keep a migraine at bay. “Every clan has another set of specific regulations for its members. If I wanted to change this, it would need to happen in agreement with the acting clan-head, in this case Hiashi-san. If he refuses to change a rule, there’s nothing I can do unless it directly endangers a person.”
Naruto still didn’t understand the problem. “But that curse-seal can kill people!”
“In the entire history of Konoha, no more than five Hyūga-clansmen have been killed through the activation of their curse-seal and in all the cases that was because they had defected the village. If the Hyūga-clan hadn’t killed them, a Konoha-nin would have. The original purpose of the seal is to protect their Kekkei Genkai and keep the Bunke in line and so my hands are tied. Hiashi-san has always made it clear that he wouldn’t abolish the curse-seal so we just have to wait until Hinata becomes the head of the clan.”
“How come you know all this?”
Tsunade turned in her seat to look out over Konoha. “Because I wanted to change this myself when I just became Hokage. Believe me, if I could have changed things, I would have already. But regardless, even without the curse-seal, I still wouldn’t be able to prevent that marriage.”
Naruto walked out of the office, his head hung low. They would have to wait until Hinata was clan-head. By then, Neji would already be married.
[-]
“Neji,” someone yelled. He recognized that voice. It was Naruto’s. Steeling himself, he stopped his training and turned to him.
Naruto gave him a hesitant glance, clearly looking fro some reassurance but Neji’s eyes were as cold as eyes and his lips tightly clenched together.
“I asked Tsunade-baachan about the curse-seal but she said there wasn’t anything we could do as long as your uncle doesn’t agree. But you two get along better now, right? Perhaps you can ask him to reconsider this marriage.” Neji was disgusted at the sheer optimism with which Naruto suggested this, thinking that he had fulfilled his promise. He turned his back to Naruto and wanted to continue his training.
“C’me on, Neji. I honestly tried,” Naruto whined.
“You tried. Do you have any idea of what a promise entails? It is not about trying, it’s about succeeding.” Neji walked up close to Naruto until their faces were just millimetres apart. “I told you just yesterday that they activated the curse-seal to force me into this marriage. How then will I convince them to let me make my own choices? A friendly chat with my uncle, the one who activated the seal will surely pay off.” His voice was dripping with sarcasm and venom and he could see Naruto understood now how much he hated him.
“I’m sorry but I honestly tried!” Neji shook his head.
“As I said, only make promises if you know you can actually make a difference. I must have been stupid to trust you.”
Naruto’s breathing had grown heavier, shocked to see someone he considered a friend be so vengeful towards him. “Give me a second chance! I’ll show you that you can trust me. I will be able to change it in the future.”
Neji walked away. “Your confidence is admirable and it will be good news for the future generations of my clan. But what about me? You promised me you would change the Hyūga for me. It doesn’t matter anymore now. I hope you can make a difference eventually but I’ve learned my lesson.”
“NEJI!” Naruto saw him disappearing in a cloud of smoke and he fell down to his knees, tears forming in his eyes. He had let him down by making a promise he then couldn’t keep. I will make a difference, Neji and I will show you that you can trust me.
[-]
“N-neji-niisan, I’m sorry I can’t help you.” Hinata stared at her feet, her hands fumbling with the hem of her shirt.
Neji stared at her from atop his futon, where he was getting ready to meet with Itachi. “I know, Hinata-sama. But you shouldn’t apologize. I trust that you’ll be an excellent clan-head in the future and that you will reunite the two branches.”
Her head shot up at the praise and she smiled at him, her confidence peeking. “You can be certain of that, Neji-niisan. I won’t let you down.”
Neji thought of how ambiguous that last sentence sounded. For him it was too late after all. The onslaught of negative reactions and situations these past two days had completely destroyed any hope he might have had that he wouldn’t have to get married in two months. He hated himself for his lack of trust in Itachi because the man hadn’t let him down in anything else those two years he knew him. Perhaps things will be better when I see him again.
“Be just and humane as you always have been and everyone will admire and respect you for it. Now if you’ll excuse me, I still have somewhere to go.” Hinata’s heart nearly burst at the unusual amount of positive comments and she nodded vehemently.
“I’ll leave you then.” He bowed his head politely as she disappeared from his bedroom and brushed his hair, not even bothering to tie it. Itachi would normally be back around ten o’clock and it was already half an hour later. If he guessed correctly, he would be cleaning himself up at his house. The thought of being away from him when he was already in Konoha was suddenly unbearable and he jumped on his windowsill and made his way over the roofs in a ferocious pace. He was already near the Uchiha-district and stormed over the roofs. He stopped and looked straight at Itachi’s bedroom-window. The light was burning and then he saw him, coming into the room, his hair still wet from a shower. Neji retrieved a kunai and threw it at the frame of the window, the weapon digging deep into the wood. Itachi spun around and scrutinized his surroundings before his eyes fell on Neji.
Neji felt that intense gaze on him and his eye-sight became hazy as tears fell down his cheeks. He saw Itachi running towards him, leaping to the roof he was standing on before arms held him close to his chest.
“Take me away from here.” Neji’s voice was muffled but he pressed himself even closer to Itachi, not wanting to let go in this lifetime or the next.
Itachi moved his hands, teleporting them to the little house on the Nara-grounds. Luckily, Shikamaru had permanently given them the key and he dragged them inside, seating himself on the sofa and pulling Neji in his lap.
“It’s over. I’m getting married in two months to some girl I’ve never even heard of,” Neji said hastily. “Everyone went on and on about how it is going to be okay but-” Itachi hauled his face close to his and pressed their lips together urgently.
“I’m not letting you go, Neji. I am not letting you go.” Itachi’s voice sounded soothing although it held that typical cold undertone.
Neji shook his head, Itachi’s hands on his cheeks. “Don’t lie to me. Don’t.”
“Look at me. The past two years my life has revolved around you. I’ve made you mine and I won’t let go. I’d kill both our clans if it meant that we were free to make our own choices.” Neji groaned, the two past days taking their toll. His mind was a mess and he didn’t know what to think or believe.
“Do you trust me?” Itachi asked. Neji shook his head in confusion, haphazardly breathing. “Do you trust me? Neji do you trust me!?”
“Yes! Yes, I trust you!” Neji shouted instinctively. His eyes flew open to find Itachi looking at him with determination.
“I promise we’ll stay together.” Neji slumped against his chest, that little spark of hope back but surrounded by mountains of doubt. He really meant it when he had yelled that he trusted Itachi but how were they going to get out of this mess in under two months?
“What happened to your neck?” Itachi asked, his voice cold.
“Hiashi-sama. I came home drunk yesterday and we got into an argument.”
“About the marriage?” Neji nodded. “Did they activate your curse-seal?” Again, a nod. Itachi drew circles on Neji’s temples, knowing it was quite effective against any headaches. He would make Hyūga Hiashi pay one day for hurting what was his because nobody gets to do that unpunished. Neji closed his eyes, realizing how much he had missed Itachi’s presence the past days.
“Do you have a plan, ‘Tachi?”
“Hai. Now rest a bit. I’ll tell you about it when you wake up.” Neji opened his eyes to look him straight in the eye, reaffirming that Itachi spoke nothing but the truth and he wasn’t disappointed. Itachi had no intention of letting him go and he laid his head on his shoulder, chastely kissing his neck before closing his eyes once more, giving in to his body’s want for sleep.
He opened his eyes a bit, something having woken him. He came face-to-face with Itachi, who was fast asleep although his arms never loosened their grasp around his waist. His face held a frown and Neji softly stroked his cheek but regretted it as he saw onyx eyes staring back at him.
“Gomen, didn’t mean to wake you.” Itachi noticed the night sky outside and gave him a peck on the lips before softly laying his head back down.
“Go back to sleep, Nej. It’s still the middle of the night.” Itachi’s calm demeanour slightly surprised him but he reprimanded himself. He trusted him and if he said he had a plan, he did have one. It must be completely prepared for him to be so unperturbed. It gave Neji a new sense of hope and he buried his head in Itachi’s neck, entangling their legs together under the blankets.
Preview Chapter VIII
“What are our options?” he finally asked straight-forwardly. He liked to believe Shikamaru cared enough to have already thought things over himself.
Shikamaru shrugged, putting out his cigarette in a nearby ashtray. “You’ve got four options.”
Thank you for reading and reviewing.
DarlingCurse: Thank you for reviewing! It really makes me smile to hear how much you enjoy this story.
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