If Only You Knew | By : narugal101 Category: Naruto > Yaoi - Male/Male > Kakashi/Naruto Views: 5787 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1 |
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story. |
Chapter
5 One Day
As
I walked to the location that Kakashi had told us to
meet him, the next morning I contemplated the reasoning behind why I had not
only been hit on once, but twice and by two men! Knowing that Kyuubi would no longer be any help on this subject I was
left to my own intellectual ability to decipher this particular conundrum.
Besides,
at this point Kyuubi would only laugh at me, and ask
me if I was so smart wouldn’t I be able to figure it out myself? That goddamn
fox could only be counted on when I didn’t really need it.
Inwardly
I shrugged.
The
fox was right, one day it wouldn’t be here, I needed to quit relying on it for
everything. Some things I needed to figure out for myself.
I
do know one thing at least. I am apparently gay. It doesn't bother my ‘moral
sensibilities’ at all. That would require one to have moral sensibilities. The
only thing that saved these mortals from me taking their lives was the fact
that I have retained some youkai abilities…and the
fact that killing them would take a bit of time and energy. All I care about is
trying to bring youkai out of hiding—or at least out
of hiding from me—so I can better protect them.
I
had been so buried in my thoughts that I had overlooked the fact that I had
arrived at the ‘meeting spot.’
Looking
around I realized that Sakura, the Pink-haired blob—as I not so affectionately
referred to her, secretly—and oh-so-perfect Sasuke
had not yet arrived. Great, now I would have to hide to ensure that I
maintained my ‘mask.’
After
all it would be shocking for Uzumaki Naruto to arrive on time.
Hiding
in nearby brush I waited for the two to arrive, not surprised to see them
arriving together. By together, I meant of course, Sasuke
walking and Sakura clinging on him like there was no tomorrow.
As
I observed them I checked my watch…yeah about five more minutes should do it…
Five minutes later…
As
I walked up to Sasuke and Sakura—seemingly from where
they had come from—there were looks of impatience on both of their faces.
Both
looks directed at me, of course.
I
smirked inwardly.
“Sorry
I’m late guys…” I apologized, scratching my head as if the fact I was late had
just now occurred to me. “Uh…where’s Sensei?”
I
knew that Kakashi had arrived shortly after I had
hidden. He hadn’t known that though. I was very good at hiding my chakra
signature. He hadn’t noticed my immersion from the shrub either. Hmmmphh! So much for elite.
However
the fact that Kakashi was late had just occurred to
the other two, their irritation at me was forgotten. For the
moment anyway.
“So much for an elite jounin shinobi!” Sakura was currently mumbling.
“He can’t even be on time. So much for setting an example to
young impressionable genin.” I just rolled my
eyes, typical Sakura answer.
Sasuke just gave his usual enthusiastic grunt…leaving the rest for us
lesser mortals to have the wondrous privilege of translating.
These
two idiots didn’t know that the entire time Kakashi
was gauging their reactions.
Damn…
I keep forgetting that I’m dealing with two chibis
who are still novices. Novices, who have yet to see or make their first kill. Novices to whom the notion kill has
not even occurred to. They would have to find out. And it wouldn’t be
too far from now.
Apparently
at one point Kakashi must have gotten tired of
Sakura’s complaining, Sasuke’s sulking, and my
standing around looking like an idiot, because he chose to appear about a few
minutes after we arrived.
Sensing
that Sakura was about to go into one of her self-righteous speeches I joined
her just to make it appear to Kakashi that I was not
traumatized by his earlier stunt. Indeed not, my mask was at its usual
enormously idiotic proportions.
“Kakashi-sensei!” we both yelled simultaneously. “You are
late!”
Having
a mask of his own on—the happy-go-lucky one—he got a sheepish look in his eyes
and rubbed his head absently.
“Sorry
guys.” He apologized seemingly without guile. “I overslept my alarm an--.”
“Save
it!” Sakura and I interrupted. Luckily Sakura’s thoughts were easily read so it
was easy to follow along with her.
It
was actually kind of surprising that her thoughts were so easily read. Because
Sakura was so weak-willed she had an entity in her mind that she called ‘inner
Sakura.’ This in itself should have prevented her thoughts from being
broadcasted like they were. I know she knew it existed. My theory was that she
hadn’t allowed the entity any reign over her mind. When it came to genjutsu she would be at a definite advantage… if she ever
got control of it…however, at the current situation she was at a major
disadvantage.
Deciding
to cut the bullshit Kakashi apparently had enough of
his fake excuse and got on with the 'mission' of our training.
Pulling
out two bells he made them ring.
I
rolled my eyes inwardly. Not this old trick. The Third and Fourth Hokage had used this teamwork technique while training
their teams. Kakashi went on to explain the details
of this training to the other two who weren’t as well-informed as me.
“The
task is this, the first two to take these bells from me get those lunches,”
pointing to a post and two rocks were two boxed lunches,” the loser will be
tied up and forced to watch the other two eat.”
“So
that’s why he didn’t have us eat lunch!” said the ever-brilliant Sakura who had
been the last one to reach the conclusion.” She pointed accusingly at Kakashi “You had this planned all along!”
Kakashi scratched his head at her accusation.
“Well,
yeah that was the idea.” He stated calmly. “Anyway let’s begin…now!”
He
took out a book after he’d said to begin. Sakura went slack-jawed and stared at
Kakashi like he belonged in a zoo.
“What
are you doing?!” she screamed in outrage.
Kakashi didn’t even look up.
“I
won’t even have to take my eyes from my book to defend myself from you.” He
still hadn’t looked up. “Go ahead and begin.”
Sasuke had already hidden, waiting until me and Sakura had bungled it up
to make his move.
Sakura
clumsily hid behind a tree…just observing for now.
Me,
I just stood there, already knowing these two didn’t get the intent of the
exercise. I had already decided I would intentionally lose,
I don't need food to survive anyway.
I
attacked Kakashi clumsily from the back, and went
sailing into the nearby river.
My
mask yelled.
“I’m
gonna be the future Hokage!”
I can’t lose!”
Making
the signs for the Kage buushin
no jutsu, one of the so-called forbidden jutsus for Konoha, I attacked
again.
Kakashi seemed mildly impressed that I managed
this, but said nothing as he popped all of my doppelgangers. He still saw right
through the real me coming for his back and decided to counterattack using a
perverted countermeasure. A ‘technique’ he’d learned from the Fourth.
“A
Thousand Years of Death!” he yelled. Turning around to face my rear end he
shoved his index finger up my ass.
For
the sake of my cover I screamed in pain as I went flying back into the river.
Inside I was irritated. That fucking pervert did not know when to take the word
no for an answer. He’d done that on purpose just to show me that he didn’t care
I’d told him to leave me alone. He was going to keep pursuing me.
Even
if he hadn't put it to words his actions had said it all.
Well
he would find out soon enough what would happen if he continued with his little
game.
Sakura,
in the mean time, had fallen prey to a genjutsu of Sasuke being stabbed by kunai, and promptly fainted.
Sasuke was still biding his time.
I
was tied up, literally. The reason being because I was tired
of trying to make those other two morons see the point of the exercise.
So I decided to end any chances of my success by going for the two boxed
lunches directly. Kakashi then tied me up, a
disgusting look in his eyes as he did so. Gods, that man really was nothing but
a lecherous pervert, I could see the nasty images he had in his mind. My youkai half may have enjoyed them, but my human half was
repulsed.
When
Kakashi had finished his little game of tying me up
he went back in the middle of the grassy field he’d started in and picked up
his book where he'd left it.
It
was then that Sasuke decided to attack.
I
watched the fight with disinterest. It would be over soon enough. Kakashi had the obvious advantage over him. Sasuke wasn’t half-bad though, Kakashi
had to put his book down in order to fight him.
In
fact Kakashi was shocked at the bastard’s fireball jutsu, he
thought that a shinobi of genin
level should not be able to use a technique that required that much chakra
development.
Sasuke’s little tirade was brought to an end,
though, when Kakashi attacked from under the ground
and yanked him down to his head into the dirt.
Sakura
by this time, had recovered from the first genjutsu,
but saw Sasuke’s head in the dirt and fainted again.
As
Kakashi walked away from him I heard him impart words
that were meant for Sasuke’s ears alone.
“I
will admit, you were right about one thing…you are not like the other two.”
When
everyone was gathered around the tied-up me, recovered from their earlier bouts
of humiliating defeat Kakashi decided to reveal his
true purpose of the exercise.
“The
true purpose of this exercise was to test your teamwork…” Sakura and Sasuke looked up at him expectantly. “Naruto,
you attacked blindly without thinking.”
“Yeah,
Naruto!” she screamed at me. “What were you
thinking?!”
Then
he turned to Sakura.
"Sakura,
you were so wrapped up with thoughts of Sasuke that
you didn’t even think about helping Naruto. And you
weren’t even able to help Sasuke in the end” She had
the decency to at least act chastised, and looked down in apparent shame.
Lastly,
he turned to Sasuke.
“You,
Sasuke….you are the worst. You thought that you were
so much better than the other two that you gave no thought to helping either. In fact waiting for them both to fail so that you would have the
perfect chance to attack me, when I was apparently occupied.” Sasuke just glared back at him and refused to answer.
Kakashi sighed.
“I
will give you all one more chance…with the condition that you don’t give Naruto any food. He cheated.” He said this in an overly
dramatic voice. “If you disobey and give him food then you will all go back to
the academy and never advance.”
He
seemingly disappeared. Even I had to admit he was above average in the stealth
department. It easy to see why he’d made it in the ANBU.
Sakura
and Sasuke ignored me and ate their food. I knew that
unless I helped these two idiots they would never get it.
Making
my stomach growl, even though I wasn’t hungry, made the two of them look up.
Sakura
looked expectantly at Sasuke.
Sasuke just gave me an irritated look.
“I’m
not hungry anyway.” Was all he said. And left the
plate on the rock where he’d been sitting.
Sakura,
finally realizing I was tied up and couldn’t reach for the bastard’s plate,
followed his example, but in a different way.
She
walked up to me with a disgusted look on her face.
“Naruto I am going to feed you, this will only happen once
and it’s only because you are tied up.”
Like I want you to come near me at all, you disgusting creature, I
thought. But if it meant the end of this stupid exercise I was willing to suck
it up once. Beside my cover didn’t have that much pride to lose.
“Thanks
Sakura!” I managed to choke out in a semi-grateful tone. This satisfied her
because after I thanked her she began cramming food down my throat. Luckily
this torture was ended a few seconds later.
Kakashi decided to arrive in his usual overly
dramatic way…in this case it was a funnel of grey smoke.
“How
dare you!” He screamed. “You….You…!” The look of horror on Sakura’s face was
amusing to say the least.
“You…Pass!!”
Kakashi’s eyes beamed at us as he yelled this.
Even
Sasuke looked confused at his announcement.
“What
do you mean we pass.” He demanded.
Kakashi ignored Sasuke’s
demands and explained.
“You
passed because even though the rule was to not help your teammate, you did it
anyway. Yes, you broke the rules, but a shinobi who
abandons his friends is even more despicable.” He spoke in such a grave,
serious tone, that I knew this was the real Kakashi
talking, the one who had known pain and loss…and to me that made him a little
less despicable. Then the, usual monotonous, lazy tone I was beginning to know
well took over again. “Tomorrow we will begin your real training. Meet me at
the overlook tomorrow and we’ll begin.”
And
without further ado he left.
Sasuke left soon after.
Sakura
looked dazed as she left slowly, I wanted to kill her, she
took so long to fucking leave.
Finally
seeing the coast was clear I utilized my claws that were convenient and
retractable and sliced through the rope. I could have escaped at any time. But
those two would have never have gotten the point if I had just gotten lose and
continued.
And it only took all day for them to realize it, I
thought sarcastically. Unusually tired, I too, turned to leave…only to come
face to face with Kakashi.
Seeing
no need to act like an idiot in front of him privately any longer I immediately
demanded.
“What
do you want?”
He
didn’t say anything for the longest time…just stared at me as if trying to
figure something out.
Okay…I officially don’t have time for this. I left,
brushing by him as I walked past him.
At
least that was my plan until he grabbed my arm and yanked me around to face
him.
I
allowed him to bring his face nose to nose with mine.
“Why
did you help them?” he whispered curiously “You had no reason to help them…yet
you did.”
“It
doesn’t concern you,” I answered him coldly, “I don’t
owe you anything. The only thing I have to say to you is…Let. Me. Go.”
Of
course he didn’t.
Really
the man would have to start listening to a perfectly good
warnings.
Or
he would get hurt.
Instead
of letting go he brought both of his hands up to my shoulders.
He
didn’t try to kiss me…just observed my features as if trying to memorize them.
“You
look so much like him…” he whispered softly “Yet there is nothing of him in
you.”
It
did impress me a little that he had grasped this concept in so little time.
This was the only reason I had not attacked him…yet.
But
I could only stand to be touched for so long.
“I
will warn you one more time.” I told him. “Take your hands off of me right now.”
This
time he did, but before he did he whispered something in my ear.
“This
time I will listen to you.” He said silkily “But next time I won’t. My intent
is to learn everything about you…Uzumaki Naruto. In time you will be mine.” Before he drew away he
licked my ear and said. “In every way.”
Giving
me one last predatory glance he disappeared, at least to the human eye.
A
shiver made its way down my spine even after he was gone. I didn’t want
him…but…the youkai part of me welcomed his
advances…as if it enjoyed his forceful embraces and threats. I would have to be
on my guard from now on.
I
was so engrossed in my thoughts I had forgotten to scan for other chakra
signatures, and hadn’t done so since Kakashi had
approached me.
Sasuke had been close the entire time.
Or
at least was near now.
Close
enough to see how near Kakashi's face had been to my
own.
Oh gods, I sighed, wearily. His aura was filled with the colors of
jealousy and anger.
Neither
of which he had any right to feel.
When
I felt him approach I prepared myself to be grabbed again…resigned to the fact
that tonight was evidently the night for people invading my personal space.
Sure
enough, Sasuke proved true to theory. He grabbed me
in a threatening manner though, completely different from Kakashi’s
embrace, which had been one trying to seduce rather than to force.
Sasuke spoke, his voice full of suppressed rage and jealousy.
“Why
were you letting him hold you like that?!” he growled. “How dare you let him
hold you like that!” His fist connected with my face.”
I
didn’t make a sound, or try to fight back as he continued to punch me. I knew
that if I made a sound this would just encourage him…as it did during of my
routine beatings.
Strangely
enough it was silent out, except for the sound of fists and feet pounding into
flesh.
When
he was finally finished I had three broken ribs, and I knew my face was bruised
beyond recognition. I had been beaten enough times to know the extent of my
injuries. This was not anywhere near the worst I have ever had.
I
stood up after I’d surveyed the damage.
“Are
you sure you’re done?”
At
my unemotional tone, Sasuke’s angry face took on a
look of confusion.
I
decided to goad him on a little more.
It
would make this confusing night a little easier to figure out. After all,
beatings and pain were things I was more than familiar with.
“Is
that really all you can do?” I openly scoffed. “You really are weak.”
He
just stood there, frozen like a popsicle.
This
really wouldn’t do at all…I would have to make him really angry. I was going to
have to push him over the edge. Only one thing could do that.
“No
wonder your brother left you alive. You were too pathetic to kill.”
A
maniacal look filled his eyes and in a scream of outrage he attacked me with
all the pent-up fury…re-living that event in his life.
He
kicked me, punched me, slammed me against a nearby
tree repeatedly.
I
was still once more, not uttering a sound, not moving.
By
the time he was finished he was panting as though he'd just run a marathon.
Suddenly he froze, and surveyed his handy work. Shock filling
his good-looking face as he'd just woken up from a dream.
He
backed away from me slowly, seemingly horrified at what he had done. His
conscience –the one whose existence he’d always tried to ignore--hitting him
full force.
“Why
did you stop?” I looked up at him, still fully aware, despite my very swollen
face. Then I laughed at him, which isn't easy when your mouth feels like the
size of a watermelon. “You really are weak.”
My
ploy at pushing him over the edge again failed. He still looked up at me,
horror being the only emotion evident on his face. Finally he managed to choke
out.
“Why?
Why didn’t you stop me?”
I
sneered at him. (Or at least attempted to).
“Why?
Well why not?”
He
backed away from me, and then ran away all together.
I
just shook my head at his retreating form and stood up and started liming back
the way I'd came this morning. Of course this morning I wasn't limping, I
thought, irony is such a bitch.
The
night had started out with such promise too. I looked up at the moon as limped
along.
One day, I promised myself, One day this empty existence will end and I
will finally be a whole being. One day.
End of Chapter 5.
To anyone reading this fic: Just thought
I'd let ya'll know that even though I do have the fic
under Sasuke/Naruto that
may be changing sometime in the future. Hope you all are enjoying
contradiction-free “If Only You Knew.” I had to take
out the part about him liking pain, I guess it was too
much for some readers. Oh well, I'll stir up enough controversy once I begin
updates again, which of course will be sooner than I thought considering I only
have four more chapter to reconstruct. Which reminds me.
The lemon needs work as well. Sigh my work is never done. Thanks for
reading and stay tuned I will be updating once I finish reconstruction.
Until then,
narugal101
While AFF and its agents attempt to remove all illegal works from the site as quickly and thoroughly as possible, there is always the possibility that some submissions may be overlooked or dismissed in error. The AFF system includes a rigorous and complex abuse control system in order to prevent improper use of the AFF service, and we hope that its deployment indicates a good-faith effort to eliminate any illegal material on the site in a fair and unbiased manner. This abuse control system is run in accordance with the strict guidelines specified above.
All works displayed here, whether pictorial or literary, are the property of their owners and not Adult-FanFiction.org. Opinions stated in profiles of users may not reflect the opinions or views of Adult-FanFiction.org or any of its owners, agents, or related entities.
Website Domain ©2002-2017 by Apollo. PHP scripting, CSS style sheets, Database layout & Original artwork ©2005-2017 C. Kennington. Restructured Database & Forum skins ©2007-2017 J. Salva. Images, coding, and any other potentially liftable content may not be used without express written permission from their respective creator(s). Thank you for visiting!
Powered by Fiction Portal 2.0
Modifications © Manta2g, DemonGoddess
Site Owner - Apollo