Complicated things

With his arms crossed, lead in his shoes and a sinking feeling in his stomach, Kakashi sits on one of the chair in the Hokage’s office. Thoughts stumble over each other in his head. It’s not fair. That he is pressured into coming here, that he needs to be looked after. He is a grown man. A grown Shinobi. A genius. He can look after himself. He can fight, clear missions and rescue people. He is the Copy nin. 

And yet here he sits, with a cup of water in front of him, waiting for the Hokage to return. He feels like a kid in school, called to the principals office. He was never called to the principals office, he was a good student. Bratty, yes, but good. 

“Right this way.” 

The Hokage has returned. She walks towards her desk and sits down. Ibiki and Iruka both walk inside. They sit down on the chairs next to Kakashi, making him seated in the middle. 

Which gives fuel to his brain about other situations where he wants to be in the middle. He closes his eyes shut and leans back in the chair, trying to cover himself and his perverted thoughts. Thinking about himself as a pervert doesn’t help either, because that makes him think about how the two men would punish him. 

Is there a way to stop thinking altogether? To just, stop? No more naughty toughs, no more wishes, no more images of situations that are nowhere real and no more distraction. 

“Hatake-san, you are hereby paired off to these two men, Morino Ibiki and Umino Iruka. They will care for you when you come back from a mission and when you need medical attention. You do not have to worry about going to the hospital, except when you are in critical condition.” 

Kakashi opens his eyes in shock. He glances from Ibiki, to the Hokage, to Iruka, back to the Hokage and back to Ibiki. “What?” he manages to bring out. He shakes his head. “There is no need for something like that,” he says. He keeps shaking his head. 

The Hokage raises a hand and gives him a stern nod. “Let me finish. This is the start of a new program. I want to pair Shinobi’s with other Shinobi’s. You Shinobi often think that being injured means a failure, you often deny yourself medical aid. I can’t have that. What if every Shinobi would do that?” She raises and eyebrow and puts her hands together. “You’ve shown me that you can be trusted to find a solution. You went to see another person who has deep knowledge about medical attention and you trusted him enough to have him actually work on you.” She smiles, softly. “I pair you off with them. That way, I know you get the medical attention you need, and it is with the people you trust.” She cocks her head to the side, smiling bigger now. 

“But, why both of them?” Kakashi gestures at the men at his sides. 

The Hokage chuckles. “You did went to see Iruka first, didn’t you? ANBU told me.  And only after you found him asleep, you carried on.” She puts a hand underneath her chin and leans on it. “Something tells me that if he was awake, you would have stopped at his place.” She shrugs. “Also, you are quite stubborn. The two of them will keep you in check. And if one of them is asleep, and you don’t want to wake him, the other probably is up for some action.” 

That last sentence makes Kakashi’s insides turn. Being up for action is something he connects with sex. He lowers his head and groans. “Really, I am fine,” he mutters. He shakes his head and tries to think of ways to get out of this situation. Not of sex. His mind likes sex. And the thoughts about it. And his body likes it as well. But he should not think about it. Not now. You’d think he was a sex addicted person. He never had sex. He only reads his book and well, fantasizes. 

“It’s your choice, really. Or you can go this route, or the other. You know, me forcing you into the hospital after every mission you return from.” 

Kakashi looks up. There is an evil glint in her eye. One he doesn’t like. He narrows his own eyes at her, even though she can only see one. 

“That would mean that every time you come back, I would have to sedate you. I would have to call some other Shinobi here and have them carry you to the hospital. Every time.” 

Kakashi leans back and swallows. He glances at Ibiki. He glances at Iruka. They both look at him with amusement in their eyes. He clears his throat. “Do you want to do this?” he asks. He lowers his gaze to his knees. 

“I do,” Ibiki says. He leans towards Kakashi and catches his gaze. “I do,” he repeats. 

Kakashi’s face grows hot and he turns his gaze towards the teacher. Said teacher is smiling softly, with his eyes closed. “I do,” he answers. He opens his eyes and nods. “I’ll keep an eye on you.” 

Kakashi sinks back in his chair and sighs loudly. “Fine, I guess.” He shrugs. 

The Hokage waves a finger around. “You have to state it, in a full sentence. You can do that, right?” She raises her eyebrow. 

Kakashi takes a deep breath and averts his eyes to his knees, again. “I, Hatake Kakashi, will be paired with Morino Ibiki and Umino Iruka, who will look after me when I am injured. When I return from a mission.” He bows his head, muttering the last words. 

“Good! Well, that is settled.” The Hokage claps her hands together and rises to her feet. “You can leave now. I’ll leave the details up to you.” She smiles and gestures at the door. 

Kakashi is the first to stand. He nods towards the other men and moves out of the office, a lot quicker then when he entered it.