Muse

5

xxxxx

“I find myself very puzzled as to why your publishing company keeps rejecting your manuscripts.” Her friend said, confused.

Hinata and Gaara were sitting in the balcony of a small café. One leg crossed as he leaned back in his chair, he had been given one of her books and one manuscript and was now looking over another. “You’re an outstanding writer and I’m not just saying that because I am personally horrible at it either.” He glanced up at her briefly with a small smile and went back to reading.

Three weeks and countless ‘dates’ later – many of their dates had consisted of simply meeting up for coffee to chat – the two were becoming quite comfortable around each other. Or rather, Gaara was becoming more comfortable around her, Hinata had moved past her initial shyness after the first week. This weekend was the trip to Sakura’s cabin was for dinner and mostly just to hang out with friends. For some more than others, a time to get drunk. The next morning the group would be politely informed that they didn’t have to go home but they couldn’t stay there, get the hell out. He had agreed to go, although he had looked a tad bit uncomfortable about being around a lot of people he didn’t know in an intimate setting. In the end, his desire to be around her was greater than his discomfort.

They were not officially a ‘couple’, he has yet to ask her to go steady with him. This put them currently in-between the ‘friend’ and ‘dating’ stage. He has not kissed her since that night although there had been a few close calls. Her friends teased her about it constantly but she was fine with things being the way they were. Whenever he wanted to take it further she would be ready.

“I’m…not really sure.” she frowned slightly “They told me that the genre isn’t popular. I’ve written three manuscripts and all of them were rejected. I have only another month until I reach my deadline. I’m living off of some of the royalties from one of my books but it’s not enough…”

“Hm.” He was halfway through when he closed it, uncrossing his legs as he sat up straight “Are these copies?”

“Those? Oh, yes, I keep the originals.”

“I have a few associates that either own a publishing company or are heavily involved. With your permission, I’d like to make a few copies of these three manuscripts and see if perhaps someone not blind and idiotic will decide to pick you up.” He sounded genuinely irritated although his expression was impassive “I strongly believe that you should receive more recognition for your work than what you’re getting. I also think you’re being underpaid but that of course is personal opinion.”

“Oh.” Blinking, she stared at him in surprise “Y-you’d do that? I-I mean I wouldn’t w-want to put you through any trouble…”

His smile was warm “It is no trouble, I offered did I not? Besides, it’s only fair, thanks to meeting you again I was able to find the inspiration to paint; I have made dozens of paintings since you were last in the studio.”

Face heating, she looked down at her chai tea. Learning that meeting her had allowed him to get over his artist’s block had made her feel honored and highly flattered. Next month would be his exhibition and afterwards he was going to give her one of his paintings. She has seen it finished and if possible she had fallen more in love with it than before. In so many ways he was such an amazing person. Even though he had such extraordinary talents he didn’t like to flaunt it, he was actually quite humble.

“I’d…I’d be so grateful.” She smiles down at her cup “Thank you.” Briefly, when she saw him place her manuscript down she thought she saw something underneath his sleeve. Frowning, she leaned forward to get a better look but then he moved his arm entirely. When she looked up he was looking at her, his gaze curious and a little confused.

“Hinata-san?” he looked at his arm and then back at her “Is there…something wrong?”

Embarrassed, she sits back “N-no I just…underneath your sleeve I thought I saw…”

Realizing what she meant he smiled slightly “You’re talking about my tattoos.” He rolled up his sleeves to reveal both of his forearms completely covered in all sorts of markings, all of them seeming to blend together with a light background. “About a year or so ago I became fascinated with tattoo artists. While I’d never do it myself, after my first one I found myself wanting to go back and get another. Then another and it eventually ended up like this.” With his hand he brushed back a bit of hair to reveal the red kanji tattoo “This was actually my first tattoo, don’t ask why it’s there of all places; let’s just say it involved my siblings and alcohol.” She giggled and he moved his arms so that his palms were facing up “The two black tattoos that look like some sort of strange maze are actually the names of my niece and nephew, my sister’s children.”

“Oh…oh really?” she sounded amazed and leaned forward, trying to see if she could determine the names. She couldn’t and when she leaned back he seemed to have been waiting for her to give up the search for he was smiling.

“Mejika and Shikato.” He told her “They’re twins, a boy and a girl. Her husband…well, they’re actually in some sort of commonwealth marriage, I don’t fully understand it and it’s usually better to not question my sister’s choices. They named my brother and I godfathers and I got these shortly after they were born. I am not entirely sure why, it simply felt like the right thing to do at the time.”

“That’s…really sweet.” Tilting her head slightly she gave him an inquisitive look “Are you going to tattoo the rest of your arms?”

He looked thoughtful “I’m not sure. Besides the tattoo on my forehead paid for lovingly by my drunken siblings, all of my other tattoos hold specific meanings or are personal designs.” He rolled down his sleeves “I might, I do actually enjoy getting tattoos…which is why my forearms are covered in them.” A small smirk and she giggled.

“Now then,” leaning back, he crossed his arms and gave her a look “there’s a specific reason I brought you here today.” At her slightly surprised expression he continued “You, Hinata-san, have been avoiding and dodging my attempts to hear you sing. So now we are on the second story of this café, outside on the balcony where there are no patrons due to the hour, doors closed and I would greatly appreciate if you’d indulge me with a song.” At this he smiled, amusement shining in those green eyes.

Hinata’s mouth dropped and her face turned as red as his hair. She had been dodging, one time she had even used playing the piano as an excuse. After the fifth time she had thought she had escaped since he never brought it up again. Quickly she tried to come up with an excuse, any excuse and he seemed to realize it because he only looked more amused at her obvious mental struggle.

“B-but…” his brows rose in mock curiosity and she had a feeling she really wasn’t going to get out of this one. “But I’m…I’m shy.” Lame attempt but it was better than nothing.

He didn’t even blink “Indeed. Well, now is your chance to overcome your shyness, after all, we would not be sitting here had I not gotten over my awkwardness around you.”

Damn he was good. “Um, I lied?” she offered and this time he chuckled lightly.

“You are your own worst critic they say. You might think you are not talented but I may think differently. There is only one way to find out.” He wasn’t even trying to hide his amusement at this point. “Anything else? I assure you I’ve gone over possibly any and every excuse you could think of and provided a counter; you are not dodging me this time.”

She resisted the urge to stick her tongue out at him “Cheater. You tricked me. I call foul.”

Uncrossing his arms he leans forward and raises his hand to brush his fingers lightly along her jaw line “Hinata-san,” another one of those warm, award winning smiles “it does not have to be anything long but I truly would love to hear your voice.”

He’s…he’s so good at this. It wasn’t fair; he was handsome and kind and then he gave her that smile with his low, soft voice and…

Oh, fine then. Closing her eyes she sat back in her chair, posture perfect. Putting her hands in her lap she opened her mouth and sang. It was a song she remembered in high school when she had been in the Girl’s Choir. It was in a foreign language but she had remembered it because it had sounded so beautiful and soothing. She only went through the first verse, too shy to continue on. When she finished she opened her eyes shyly and then blinked at what she saw.

Her friend was…staring at her. There was mild surprise but otherwise his expression was blank. After a moment he actually tilted his head, as if he were listening to something. His stoic expression shifted to one of shock and awe, his gaze was unfocused, as if he were looking more into himself than the outside world. Putting a hand through his hair he finally looked at her again and there were too many emotions there for her to pin down a specific one.

“First of all,” he cleared his throat when his voice came out a little scratchy “you are an amazing singer, I-I almost think that your voice and my music…” he shook his head “Anyway, secondly, as I was sitting here listening to your voice I attempted to sort out the various genres that it could belong to. In doing that I began to…hear music.” He sounded pleased, shocked, and awed. “There has been silence in my head for almost seven months.” The redhead looked thoughtful, as if he was slowly sorting out the pieces to a puzzle. His gaze snapped to her “You are the reason for my inspirations.” His gaze began to drift and it was difficult to tell if he was talking to her or himself “Ever since you’ve come into my life all I’ve been able to do is create. Painting and now music…Hinata-san, I don’t think I can express the pain and frustration I was feeling before you. Painting, composing, those were things that came to me as easy as breathing. When my mind ‘clicked off’ I was devastated, I felt as if I had lost a limb or had gone blind.” He once again put a hand through his hair “You…are amazing.” He said the last part low, almost a whisper, but she caught it.

There were no words. So many emotions moved through her at his statement, most of it happiness. While she never would have thought herself as being inspiring to anyone she had, apparently, become a genius’ muse. Knowing that she was the reason he had been able to kick his artist’s block made her feel so many different things.

“The song is about you.”

Would he write more songs with her in mind? Putting a hand over her chest she found herself feeling…warm. Happy. Very warm and happy. She was beginning to like him a lot and obviously he returned her feelings. It was hard to believe that this person, an artistic genius that was famous within his community had found his inspiration through her. His recent paintings, the songs he would write…all because of her. What could one say to that?

Slowly, she opened her mouth to speak but suddenly he was up and on his feet. Quickly, he reached down and took her hand, pulling her up. His eyes were bright but shifted, as if listening to something. Shaking his head briefly, he looked at her.

“Come to my studio with me,” he implored “I…I want you to hear…” moving closer to her, he raised a hand, cupping her cheek “I want to share with you what I’m hearing right now in my mind. I think I honestly might be in –“ as if catching himself he turned his head although she caught the tell tale blush “Forgive my excitement it’s just…silence for seven months and now…”

Squeezing his hand she smiled at him when he focused on her. “I’d love to hear them.” Blinking, she realized she was fighting back tears.

I think…I know it’s so soon but I think I might really be falling in love with him. His passion, his drive, even his eccentricities were all fascinating to her. He was kind and extremely loyal, he was open and honest with his feelings. Most important of all, he seemed to be as completely into her as she was with him.

Instead of letting go of her hand as he normally would have, he pulled her closer to him, interlacing their fingers. As they walked she could see how he truly was in his own world, going over notes and whatever else a genius like him would think of. Despite his distraction he never once let go of her hand or allowed her to leave his side, so she rested her head and hand along his arm and they walked quietly to his studio.

xxxxx

At nine in the morning Uchiha Sasuke unlocked and opened the door to the bookstore he owned with his brother. When he opened it, Hyuuga Neji was standing right outside.

He closed the door.

“Itachi,” lightly jogging, the younger brother rounded the corner “Hyuuga.” Was all he said.

With a sigh, the older brother was tying the back of his apron when the topic of the ‘conversation’ walked inside. He actually looked slightly amused for just a moment before shifting to his normal Hyuuga ‘mask’. Beyond the small smirk, that was perhaps the only thing Itachi could address as being positive in terms of appearance.

His clothing and hair looked as great as always, his posture was straight, almost regal due to his background. When those white eyes moved over to look at him, however, it was obvious that the buck stopped there. Neji’s skin was paler than usual, it was quite obvious he had not been sleeping well if the dark circles under his eyes said anything and Itachi was absolutely positive the man had held more weight on him the last time he had seen him.

There was the difference between the two males. Sasuke absolutely forced himself not to allow anything to change his daily routine, thusly, his brother looked fine and healthy. The Hyuuga looked very tired and very stressed. Regardless, he still conducted himself in the normal fashion.

“Should I take that as me not being welcome here?” the younger man asked and Itachi raised an eyebrow.

“Hyuuga,” he began “while I have no intentions of removing you from our store if you truly wish to browse and purchase an item, we all know that is not why you are here. In saying that, unless you are here to tell my brother that your final decision is to be with him regardless, he does not wish to hear it.”

The older Uchiha watches as the mask hardens, making the younger male look completely unemotional. Once again he resisted the urge to sigh. This entire situation was trying on many different levels.

“I am here,” he began, not speaking loudly but definitely speaking to where Sasuke could probably hear “because Uzumaki Naruto is an idiot and told him something I said that, without any explanation, could be taken out of context. As everyone is well aware, I am currently attending the local university to acquire my bachelor’s in business and then to pursue my MBA. My minor is in mathematics. In any case, despite the fact that I am more than halfway finished, my father wants me to begin working full time at the company as an executive.”

“He is joking, isn’t he?” Itachi couldn’t keep the surprise out of his voice. There was no way anyone could handle that sort of workload. “You would have to drop out of school.”

A small sigh “Yes. I am currently a full time student, I cannot continue to be full time and try to help my father run his company, it is simply not possible.” A small smirk that looked almost bitter “I even tried to break it down for him mathematically concerning the hours I have in school versus the hours I would need to be in the office. Well, at the moment, he is not exactly being sympathetic to my plight. The company is barely five years old and it is just now starting to come to a point where it is making a solid profit. The downside is that my father needs manpower and simply cannot afford it, not at the moment. In short, he is desperate and quite uncaring of the fact that he’s making me abandon the degree he told me to get in the first place. For the past month and a half he and I have been going back and forth, it has not been a pleasant experience.” Slouching slightly he put a frustrated hand through his hair “I did not say it to be dismissive or uncaring although yes, I was frustrated at the time.”

Well, that explained why he had been rather distant towards his brother just before Sasuke broke it off with him. More than likely it also had much to do with the sharp weight loss and too pale complexion. Itachi really did feel for the man; Neji is extremely loyal and dedicated to his family and because he is considered a genius, they never give him a break. On a personal level he could understand, he had been in Neji’s shoes with his own father and that had turned out rather ugly. By the end of it both sons had been written out of their father’s will and neither of them has spoken to him in years. Their distant relative Uchiha Madara was now to take over the company, when it was supposed to have been him. It had not exactly been easy for him to walk away from his family either.

Neji straightened, driving Itachi out of his thoughts. “That was all I had come here to say.” He said politely.

Hm, I wonder. “Are you going to the dinner this weekend?”

The look he gave Itachi was answer enough “No, Naruto specifically stated that one must have a date. At the moment, I do not qualify.”

“Oh? That did not stop my brother, he is going with Morino Idate.” While he realized he was dealing a rather low blow to a man who was miserable all around concerning his life, he also wanted Neji to realize just how serious his brother really was.

The reaction he had expected did not come. He had expected perhaps a feature on the younger man’s face to twitch or an actual frown. Instead, he stared at Itachi as if he had just punched him in the stomach. He was stunned and it showed; stunned, confused, and not a little bit hurt.

“Sasuke is…?” his voice was low and it was difficult to tell what emotion had been behind it.

“They are going as friends.” Itachi elaborated, cutting the guy a break. He had wanted to get a point across, not torture him.

His expression turned contemplative. “I see. Anyway, I should get going, I do not wish to overstay my welcome.”

Just before he walked out the door Itachi had one more thing to say “You know, you are going to have to make a decision sooner or later. You cannot put this off forever.”

The Hyuuga’s hand froze over the door for a moment. He did not turn to face Itachi “Yes, I know.”

Once Neji had left Itachi quickly put up a ‘Be Right Back’ sign on the door and walked around the corner to find his brother. Sasuke was sitting on the floor at the far end of the aisle, knees up, head down. Worried for his little brother, he closed the distance.

“You aren’t crying are you?” it was a rather ridiculous question, the last time Sasuke had cried was when he had damn near killed himself while riding his bike at the age of seven. He still had the scars from that day.

Instead of answering he raised his head, face completely clear “Do I look like the crying type?” letting out a frustrated noise he leaned his head back against the wall “I need to quit being an idiot about this.”

Translation: He had, for a brief moment, hoped that Neji had actually arrived to tell him that his final decision was to be with him. It had been shattered in about five seconds but had been there nonetheless and he felt like a fool for believing it in the first place.

“If it makes you feel any better, he is obviously not eating or sleeping, he’s lost at least ten to fifteen pounds and…well those were definitely dark circles under his eyes.”

“No, Itachi, that doesn’t make me feel better.” He shoved a hand into his thick hair “There was a reason I stuck around for as long as I had. You, Naruto, and Neji are probably the only ones who know and understand it. If it had been a situation where I could have just moved the fuck on I would have done so years ago. I might not have even gone after him in the first place. But that’s not how my mind, body, whatever the fuck works. ‘Moving on’, for me, is an impossible concept, there is no one else.”

Saying that his brother was ‘gay’ was somewhat incorrect. In reality, Sasuke held no attraction to either gender, he never had. It was not a matter of having ‘preferences’ for him. In his entire life his little brother has been attracted to one person and it is the only reason he sat around for six years waiting. It wasn’t for lack of trying; there had been times when during one of their breakup periods Sasuke did actually try to go out to try and maybe pick someone up. It wasn’t even a matter of lack of attraction; there was simply absolutely no sexual desire there. None.

It hadn’t really bothered his brother until he began his rocky relationship with Hyuuga, then it had became extremely frustrating. Without Hyuuga his brother was asexual and he couldn’t even try to pretend to be anything else. At this point, unless his brother found someone else that pulled a reaction from him he would remain alone for a very long time. Itachi was certain it was a frustrating and depressing situation for him. No one truly enjoyed being alone and it couldn’t be easy knowing that the only person you are actually sexually attracted to was someone you couldn’t be with.

There were a rather small percentage of truly asexual people in the world; his brother was one of them. “Sasuke –“

“I’ll be out on the floor in a minute.” He sounded tired “Just forget about it, it’s not your problem.”

Understanding that he wasn’t going to get anything else out of his brother today he decided to go and reopen the shop.

xxxxx

Whenever Gaara thought ‘cabin’ he envisioned something small, wooden, comfortable. ‘Huge mansion in the forest’ was not what he considered a ‘cabin’. The Haruno family’s cabin was pretty much a mansion overlooking a lake. If the place had hardwood floors he’d be surprised, it looked that fancy.

“At least there will be plenty of rooms.” He muttered to himself, adjusting his back pack on his shoulder.

Sakura was there, of course, wearing a rather fashionable sundress. While it was still rather cold, Gaara could only assume she was wearing it because she had no intentions of going outside. He actually did ‘know’ her, although it was mostly because she had been at the same parties and dinners as he, it had nothing really to do with actual association. Nevertheless, when she saw him she immediately rushed over, grabbing Hinata’s hand and looking up at the redhead with a genuine smile.

“Hinata-chan, so this is your boyfriend?”

He watched Hinata hesitate and he found himself answering for her “Yes.” He said, putting his arm around her shoulders. She actually did this weird shy/blushing number that looked incredibly cute on her.

The fact that Hinata hadn’t been sure was strictly his fault. For some reason he had begun to see her as his girlfriend, even though he had continued to keep a friendly distance from her. Because he had seen her as such, he had forgotten to actually ask her to be his girlfriend. After almost a month of dating he was fairly certain that moving along would not be unreasonable.

The two girls chatted idly for a minute or so before Sakura had to go inside and attend to the other guests. Many had arrived, many still had yet to come. When Sakura left he took Hinata’s hand, interlacing their fingers.

“I apologize if I made you uncomfortable.” She shook her head and flashed him a small smile. He returned it “To be honest, I have been seeing you as my girlfriend for the past two weeks…I apparently forgot that one needs to ask before assuming.”

She giggled “Are you asking me now to be your girlfriend?”

He stopped walking and tugged on her hand, pulling her close. With his free hand he brushed his knuckles along her cheek “Yes, I am. If you had asked me about a month ago if I would see myself in this position I would probably laugh at the absurdity.” His hand moved to cup her cheek “I’m sorry I never actually asked you. I care about you a lot, I would be very happy if you wished to be with me.”

When she pulled him down for a kiss he did not resist her, instead he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. It wasn’t a deep or passionate kiss, but he enjoyed it all the same. When they parted she buried her face in his chest.

“I’ve really wanted to be with you for a while now.” She admitted and the admission does surprise him “So, I’m really happy.”

Letting her go he takes her hand once more and they continue their path to the ‘cabin’. “That was probably the most unromantic way to go about it, I will make it up to you when we get back.”

Hinata was his muse, his inspiration and he was madly in love with her. He had fallen in love with her back when he had been thirteen and he was still in love with her eight years later. To have her in his life like this was nothing short of a miracle to him. He’d had many girlfriends before, this one he had no intentions of letting go for any reason.

Another giggle “Sometimes the best memories are the ones that aren’t strictly romantic, just emotional.”

When they walked inside two servants came and grabbed their jackets and overnight bags. On one thick white couch sat Naruto and his girlfriend Ino who was definitely resting against him. Beside her was Sasuke, his date was nowhere to be seen. She felt a little confused; she didn’t remember Neji saying anything about going but Sasuke was here so did that mean…?

“Hey there!” Sitting up a bit Naruto waved to the new comers. Ino sat up to take in Hinata’s new boyfriend and Sasuke raised a lazy hand in a half hearted wave. “So, Hinata-chan’s finally got a boyfriend.” Uzumaki said the word in a sing-song voice and turned to the others, wiping away an imaginary tear “They grow up so fast…” that got him an amused snort from Sasuke and Ino laughed along with him.

“N-Naruto-kun…” her face turned a bright red which only made everyone grin even wider. Then Ino leaned over her boyfriend to stare at Gaara who gave her a blank look. They stare at each other for a moment and then Ino turns to her friend “Your boyfriend is totally hot, Hinata. I’d totally –“

Suddenly she found herself being grabbed and tickled by her boyfriend “Hey you! You’ve been being a little traitor lately…”

Calmly, Sasuke stood, allowing the couple to begin wrestling on the couch. Shoving a hand in his pocket he walked over to the couple, a bored expression on his face. He stopped in front of Gaara and the two males sized each other up. His dark gaze slid over to Hinata lazily.

“Just keep him away from my brother.” He warned and she giggled.

“Where’s Neji-niisan?” she asked him and then immediately regretted it when she saw the look on his face. Did something happen?

Then the look was gone. Turning to her, he put a hand on top of her head “Why are you always the last one to know everything?” he moved his hand and she began to move around in response. He shot another look to Gaara “She’s painfully innocent, I guess you could say she’s the baby of the group.”

The redhead smiled slightly, his hand on her lower back “I got the impression that you all seem to protect her and I am glad. Friends, good friends, are difficult to come by.” There was something slightly guarded in his tone and Hinata knew exactly what it was. In an attempt to comfort she leaned against him and he gave her a small smile before looking up at the others. “I’d like to thank you for allowing me to tag along, it is a pleasure to meet all of you.”

“Yeah.” Sasuke tilted his head and Naruto was now on top of Ino on the couch. With a sigh he turned back “Just ignore the two idiots and you’ll be set.” He turned to walk away but then paused. “Hinata? In answer to your question, we’re no longer together.” With that he walked out to the back yard.