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The Search for the Uchiha Matriach	By : diamondsy Category: Naruto > Het - Male/Female Views: 6928 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and its characters in any way (Masashi Kishimoto and Shonen Jump do). I do not, am not, and will not gain profit from this or any other fanfictions I make.

Chapter List
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Sasuke never did like weddings. His best friend's wedding was no exception.
People getting worked up over two people binding themselves to work for each other's benefit.
Single women bemoaning their singlehood and conspiring to catch the bouquet. Men like Genma prowling the aisle for easy lays (i.e. these single women). Married women sharing knowing and frightfully disturbing looks. Normally amiable women turning to asinine control-freaks better known as "Bridezilla."
So much drama and ado over nothing.
The fact that he was dragging a bawling Naruto back to the aisle did not help the wedding's case.
"Ayame's waiting, dobe. Let's go."
"No!!! You can't makes meeeessssh! I dun wanna gut merry! Ayame. Sheeeeesh craysheeee!" Naruto blathered on.
The heavy scent of alcohol did not escape Sasuke, "Then, why did you propose to her, dobe?"
"Becuss I loveeeeshhhhh sherrrrg andddd I wanna habbb shex."
Huh. Leave it to Naruto not to score before marriage. "Exactly, and you will never have any unless you marry her. Now, let's go, dobe," the Uchiha pressed on.
Naruto pulled at his left wrist to no avail. Slowly, he turned to Sasuke, "Ya knooo Sasuke. They shaaaay ya neburrr fargeeetsss your purst kesssssssss," He slurred, punctuating each word with a poke on Sasuke's chest.
What the fuck is he talking about?
The heir of the Legendary Toad Sage grabbed Sasuke's kimono and pressed his forehead against Sasuke's, "You werrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr mine." He inched his face closer to Sasuke's. Sasuke's eyes bulged as Naruto puckered up. Pushing Naruto away, he spat, "Get a fucking hold of yourself!"
Naruto wobbled closer to Sasuke, "Sashhke. I... I...." With that, he threw up on Sasuke's sandals.
It took all of Sasuke's willpower not to hit Naruto square in the jaw. Taking a deep breath, he grabbed Naruto by the shoulders.
"Naruto, listen to me," Sasuke said through gritted teeth, "You are getting married. Your wife is waiting at the altar. You love her. She loves you. This is the moment you've been waiting for. A chance to start a family and share a life with someone you care about. Don't screw it up."
Regaining his senses, Naruto answered, "You're right, Sasuke... It's just that... It's just that..."
"Yes, I know, you're having second thoughts. Hell, I had second thoughts giving you the lunch Kakashi prepared in the bell test. Under Kakashi's threat, I could have lost my chances of ever becoming a shinobi and fulfilling my own dreams," Sasuke found himself smiling despite himself, "But I took a plunge. And look where it got me? Well, yes, I did screw up countless of times. But right now, I'm right here. Happy. More or less. With you guys, my family."
Rather proud of his lengthy speech, he looked at Naruto for response.
"But... What if it's not big enough?!" Naruto wailed, "Oh my gosh. Sai used to tease me for my size! What if it's true?!?!?! Sasuke, you're my friend, right? Can you check if it's big enough?"
PAK. Sasuke hit Naruto on the head. "Nothing you can do about it. Let's go, dobe."
Naruto rubbed the back of his head and beamed at Sasuke, "Alright, alright. Thanks, Sasuke." Then he added, as an afterthought, "Teme."
"Anytime," Sasuke grinned, "Naruto."
As if on cue, Sakura burst out the chapel and turned to Sasuke, "Sasuke! Have you found Naruto, yet? The crowd's getting restless! Ayame- Ayame-You do not want to know."
"Yes, I did. He was painting graffiti on the Hokage Monuments, drinking a bucketload of rice wine. He's right... here." Sasuke turned back to see Naruto passed out on the vomit-filled floor, "Shit."
Sakura rushed to Naruto's side and began to check his pulse, "He's still alive. He's only passed out from alcohol intake"
No shit. I would have never guessed. "Whatever shall we do without your skill of intuition?" Sasuke asked dryly.
Ignoring him, the pink-haired medic proceeded to administer medic jutsu on Naruto. She stood up and turned to Sasuke, "It's no good. He's out cold. At this rate, he won't be able to wake up in time for the wedding-"
"Then, we'll have to postpone the ceremony," Sasuke finished.
"Unless..." Sakura's eyes lit up and she turned to Sasuke.
What? I don't like that look. Sasuke found himself intensely disturbed by the appraising look of Sakura, "No. No. Absolutely not. I am not henge-ing into that dobe and taking his place at the wedding."
"I was going to suggest that I henge into Naruto," Sakura retorted, "But, I like the way you think!"
"No."
"As the best man, it is your responsibility to make sure that this wedding goes on!" Sakura insisted.
"Exactly. As best man, I have to be by Naruto's side at the wedding. How, Sakura, do you expect me to fulfill said responsibility when I am out pretending to be the groom?" Sasuke demanded.
"For the last remaining Uchiha, Class-S shinobi that took on 5 Kages and their 10 aides, Orochimaru, Kabuto, Danzo, and even Madara, wound up in EVERY single Bingo Book conceivable, which by the way, also included your own country's for a while, and evaded capture for over three years, you're pretty dumb!" Sakura said exasperatedly, "Ever heard of bunshins?"
"Besides, what if Naruto does not want to get married to her, after all? Are we really going to pretend to be him and make this big decision for him?"
"Bullshit."
"You're right. He's madly in love with her. But no way, I am not kissing that bitch."
"Why?" Sakura pressed her face closer to Sasuke, looking at him suspiciously "You've never been kissed before, have you?"
He could smell her lavender cologne as his personal space was violated, yet again. "I have. Countless of times."
"Prove it. Take-" Sakura began.
"Do you really want me to?" Sasuke asked, inching closer to Sakura's face, with their lips almost touching, "To prove it?.
Her beckoning lips, her tantalizing aroma, her intoxicating breath assaulted his senses. A second longer and Sasuke would have leaned in and captured the loud kunoichi's lips. However, Sakura pressed her hands against his chest and pushed back.
Gods. What is wrong with me? Sasuke found himself surprised at his actions.
"Do it. Henge into Naruto. Take his place in the wedding," she said breathlessly, "Just a light peck will do."
"Why should I? Give me one good reason to."
"To quote, 'I know I don't show it- but I... I care about you and Naruto.' Prove it." Sakura demanded, looking at Sasuke with steely determination.

Sasuke never did like weddings. And yet, here he was, in the middle of the altar, standing beside a perfect replica of himself, pretending to look on eagerly as his best friend's bride began to walk to aisle.
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- 6
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The Search for the Uchiha Matriach