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Love Me When I'm Gone	By : KittenCobra Category: Naruto > Het - Male/Female Views: 1971 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto (the manga or anime) or any of the characters included within it. I only own the original characters in this story including the main character Utako Mizuke. I do not make any form of profit off of this story.

Chapter List
- 47
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48. Honeymoon
Gaara carried us through the streets of Suna, above the people, on his platform of sand. He carried us slowly enough that those who wished to catch a glimpse of us could. This presented a bit of a challenge I did not expect as I captured the minds of those coming into range, and released the minds of those who could no longer see us to maintain my illusion. I managed well enough, however. Eventually, we arrived at the roof of his mansion and went inside. Temari, Kankuro, and Michiko will be staying at alternate locations for the next week so that we can have the place to ourselves. This is both a blessing and a curse, as it means I will be unlikely to get any sleep until after that time.
As I walk inside, I am surprised to see that Gaara’s room is not as I expect it to be. It has been completely remodeled to absorb where the guest bedroom used to be upstairs. It is huge now, with a large oversized bed in the middle, and beautiful new furnishings around the inside. The large bed has huge posts in each corner with beautiful gauze which can be draped to enclose the entire thing. It is obvious that Gaara made an attempt to brighten the room up, but there are still undertones of red and black throughout. I think this is appropriate, or it would not feel like his presence was still here.
“I love what you’ve done with your room,” I compliment his effort as I wander over to the beautiful full length mirror to one side.
“Our room,” he corrects me, “It was no longer sufficient for both of us. I’m glad you approve.”
I pull off the white hood that completes my outfit and set it gently atop the nearest dresser. I then turn to face him and snatch the awful Kazekage hat off of his own head and throw it carelessly onto the floor. He cocks one hairless eyebrow at me in question with a half-smirk.
“I have always detested that thing… and these robes,” I admit. “They hide too much of your handsome figure from me.”
“Speaking of hiding a beautiful figure,” he mumbles, grabbing the white fabric wrapped around my middle. “I want to unwrap my gift now.”
“Actually…” I hedge, “I did get you a real gift. Can I give it to you now?”
He steps back to look into my eyes and I am captured by the heat buried in the jade.
“Of course.”
I pull a tiny black box from the pocket of my gown and hand it to him. I feel butterflies in my stomach as I wait for him to open it. I am not at all sure of what his reaction will be and I remember his own nervousness when he presented me with my glass vase. He reaches into the black box and lifts my gift from it – a small silver chain with a pendant. The pendant is a simple silver heart, but I have had the image of my face etched into the fragile metal. I also had the jeweler coat the pendant in a special solution to harden the silver so that the image won’t fade away in our lifetime.
“It’s not as beautiful as you are,” he smiles into my eyes, “but it’s as close as it could possibly be. Thank you My Love.” I realize this is the second time he has called me this since the wedding. I like it.
“There’s something else to accompany it,” I hurry to explain, “but I need to touch your mind to give it to you. I wanted to ask your permission first.”
“You have it,” he says without hesitation.
I can feel my heart in my throat at the obvious trust he has for me. I begin to sing, bringing my hands up to caress the sides of his face. The tune still has no words, because the ones in my heart are ones I cannot speak. I sing his melody, the first thing I ever sung to him that day in the training yard. As I do, I touch the memory and recall focus points in his mind. I carefully build a tiny trigger and let my song drift to its conclusion. I take the delicate chain from him and place it around his neck.
“Now,” I say softly, only inches from his face. “Grasp the pendant in your hand, and rub your thumb softly against the back of it. You should feel a tiny groove there.”
He follows my instructions and, much to my glee, it trips the tiny trigger I built into his mind. He begins to hear my voice, my song, drift through his thoughts. His eyes grow wide, and a genuine smile spreads across his face as he stares back at me. I smile lovingly in return and kiss his mouth softly.
“No matter what happens,” I pull back to explain, trying to be careful with my words. I stroke his face again gently. “No matter where I am, or how far I may be from you… you will always have a piece of me with you. Like you infused your own chakra into my beautiful gift, I have melded my voice and my love into mine.” I can only hope he understands after I am gone, how much this gift means to me.
He is overwhelmed with emotion at what I have given him and like usual has no idea what to do with it. He is elated and excited to have a piece of me to carry with him, but his mind wars against the idea of being separated from me at all. I want to giggle at the perplexed expression on his handsome face. His need for me becomes all-consuming and he pulls me against him to capture my mouth in a passionate kiss.
“Please,” he asks roughly, “open your mind to me again. I want all of you.”
I anticipated this request. This is what, I hope, will be my final challenge. If it doesn’t work… at least I have already given him my gift. With my mind carefully portioned off to maintain my illusion, I open the rest of it to him. I can only hope he does not recognize the separation as anything other than the limits of my mind – like he can now feel the walls of his own when he wishes for me to speak to him. I let the larger part of my attention focus on him: the sight, smell and feel of him – the rhythm of his breathing as he kisses me. Ever since we left Konoha, I have burned for him – dimmed only by my tiredness along the way. I can feel him unwrapping the fabric of my kimono – trying to be gentle despite his intense desire to be rid of it.
He casts the material aside and pulls back from our kiss to gaze at me. I now wear a secondary gift – a set of skimpy white lingerie with tiny black and red ribbons woven through the fabric. His eyes narrow as the greedy smile of his that I love so much spreads across his expression. I look pointedly at his ruffled robes, and he rips them off and tosses them away. He strips everything else off equally quickly, and paces towards me with heat blazing in his eyes.
His muscles ripple and flex with his movements. In this light, the black around his eyes and the bright jade within them give his face a severe cast, and I love the flutter it stirs within me. His body is more than ready for me. Desire is coursing through him like a storm as he tries to memorize the way I look in this moment.
I lean back against one of the large posts on the bed to taunt him. I wait until he has nearly reached me – his hands outstretched to grab me and pull me in – before skipping back and away. He is startled by my withdrawal but comforted by the teasing tone in my thoughts. I have no intention to make this easy for him. I want to challenge him and have him meet my challenge.
Problem? I tease him.
He turns and paces towards me again, playing along with my game. His greedy smile matches his thoughts exactly. Just as he reaches for me, I again skip away to the side and can’t help the slightly devilish laugh that trickles from my lips.
You are testing my already strained patience… he warns.
“Oh, poor baby,” I croon with a false pout. “Can’t seem to catch what you want?”
I hop up onto the edge of one of the dressers facing him, leaning back and smiling seductively with my lower lip between my teeth. He considers calling on his sand, but decides against it quickly – remembering me flinch away from it so long ago and worried it would hurt me. This frustrates me. As completely as he trusts me to touch his mind, I trust him with his sand.
“It is part of you, Gaara,” I echo his sentiments to me from so many nights. “I do not fear you.”
But he is unwilling to test that theory, even though he can feel my aggravation at that revelation. He jumps for me, catching my upper arms and bringing his mouth down hard.   I decide to give in for a little while. He drinks from my lips, stroking his hands across my body as the fire within him grows. I can feel both of us burning, and I desperately fight to keep my train of thought. He begins to trail kisses down my throat and I seize the opportunity. I chirp out a couple of brief notes, calling on my chakra just enough to knock him back a step, as I flip up and across the large room from him – again just out of his reach. He turns and narrows his eyes, truly aggravated but reveling in the need he can feel radiating from me. He knows that I want to be caught.
He finally gives in – desperate to keep me in place – and calls forth his sand. It wraps around me completely and lifts me into the air slightly and then pulls my back tight against the far wall facing him. It feels like rough silk sliding across my skin as gentle as his own caress. He stalks towards me with his greedy smile, now much more confident as the sand recedes gently from the front of my body but keeps me trapped in place. I smile seductively back at him, feeling my body quiver with excitement. The sand lifts my hands and pins them above my head as he reaches me and presses his body against me. I move to wrap my legs around his strong waist and the sand allows the movement.
He kisses me roughly for a long time while his hands caress my breasts and he rubs against my core. The thin white fabric I still wear frustrates him. As quickly as the thought crosses his mind, the sand tears away every piece and I am left completely naked and half-cocooned in sand. I want to touch him, to run my hands all over his smooth skin, but my hands are still pinned above my head. He can feel my frustration and a low chuckle rumbles from his chest. He grins wickedly before seizing my breast with his mouth.
He tortures me endlessly with his mouth and hands, and slides himself against my wet heat. Each time he pushes me to the edge he pulls back abruptly changing his focus, and before he’s finished I am begging him for release. I am wound so tight I feel like my body will snap. He is everywhere, and we both burn with a need that is blinding.
“Please,” I beg, pushed beyond caring. “Don’t torture me.”
“I thought that’s what you wanted,” he teases, chuckling darkly again. “Wasn’t that the point of this game? To push me… to make me take what I crave from you?” He bites down softly into the flesh between my neck and shoulder and my need is so great it threatens to bring tears to my eyes.
“Yes,” I moan, nipping at his ear in frustration. “But I thought you wanted all of me…”
He has been holding back his mind from my pleasure in an attempt to maintain control, so I slam it into him breaking his resolve. With a deep groan, he drives into me and I cry out in pleasure and relief. The sensation of him filling me is exquisite and I try to channel some of the excess pleasure into the structure around me. I can hear the building groan in protest. As he begins to move inside me I can feel the sand around me begin to ripple and shudder, heightening my sensation.
Please baby, I call to him desperately, give me my hands. Please! I want to touch you.
In an instant his sand releases my arms, and I bring them down to grip into his blood red hair as I pour my passion into our kiss. He drives into me again and again, his thrusts growing in strength and speed as his sand holds me securely in place against the wall for him. I let my hands roam down his strong shoulders and back, loving the feeling of his skin beneath my palms. We are both so close. I pull my mouth away from his to bring it to his ear.
“I love you, Gaara,” I whisper to him through my ragged breaths.
“Mizuke…” he moans. “My… Love.”
His climax slams through him like a tidal wave, and with our minds still connected pulls me right over the edge with him. I cry out, throwing my head back and feeling the structure around us groan again in protest. He has withdrawn from me – as careful as ever – but I can feel his body shudder against my own through the waves of bliss.
Slowly, gently, his sand falls away from me letting my limp form fall against him. He lifts me into his arms and carries me on shaky legs to the big bed. He sets me down gently, and then topples in himself with a heavy sigh. I wrap my weak arms around him and pull myself in to snuggle tightly against his chest, breathing in the earthy scent of him. I trail kisses along his collar bone.
I slowly, carefully pull my mind back from his and put a wall up.   It is not a complete barrier – as this would worry him. He can still sense me, still feel my pleasure, but my worries are my own.
Good grief… I have to stay awake. I can only pray I have the strength and endurance to maintain this illusion until I am safely again out of his sight…
“Hmmm…” he mumbles into the pillows, “It’s a good thing I have you all to myself for a while.”
I can feel him start to drift off into a deep sleep. I cautiously pull myself up onto the pillows and he nuzzles himself down, settling between my breasts before his limbs begin going completely limp. I run my hands through his hair over and over again in an endless march. I love the feeling, and the constant movement helps keep me awake and him asleep.
After an hour or so, I feel a tiny flutter in my stomach for the first time in a long while. I realize I have only felt this when he is near me, and when I am still enough to feel the faint sensation. I wonder idly if the baby will recognize him after it is born. I have heard that some children grow to recognize their father’s voice while still in the womb. This could only be possible if I am successful in maintaining my illusion but the thought makes me smile. I desperately want them to have some kind of connection once I am gone.
When I think he is deeply asleep enough, I creep once again into the depths of his mind. I locate the small corner I have reserved for these memories – locked away behind a mental seal. I add my memories of this day and my happiness. I add the faintest bit of my sadness at knowing I cannot stay with him forever, and my hope that somehow he and this child can come to love one another despite losing me.
This is our baby Gaara, I bury deep in the memories. This is a part of me. My true gift to you. I beg of you to love him… and tell him… his mother loved him too.
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Love Me When I'm Gone

48. Honeymoon