Adult-FanFiction.org : Naruto

The Thin Line Between Love and Hate - COMPLETE	By : kizukatana Category: Naruto AU/AR > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 2093 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, Kishimoto does. I make no money from anything I write on this site.

Chapter List
- 3
- 4
- 5
-xXx-
Sunday
Itachi looked at the photos in more detail when Sasuke was at the gym. While he could see Sasuke's point that it seemed pretty clear what was happening, there were some things that bothered him. They both showed Naruto in bed naked at least from the waist up, his legs covered by the crimson sheets, looking flushed. The first showed Hinata standing next to him, wearing just a towel. She was leaning over him, with her hand under his head at the base of his neck. Sakura was wearing a bra and panties, and was kneeling on the bed beside Naruto, also leaning over him with her arms around him. The second was even worse. Sakura was now kneeling between Naruto's legs, and her face just above his crotch. The camera was directly behind her, so it wasn't possible to see exactly what her mouth was doing but... it didn't look good. Hinata was watching her, with a look of expectancy on her face.
The towel bothered Itachi. If you have gotten a woman out of her clothes and into your bedroom, why would she be back in a towel before the event was over? It didn't usually play out that way, even with the shy ones. And her expression was off. It didn't look lustful or even embarrassed. In the first photo, she looked more worried. In the second, she looked like she was just... waiting for something. Sakura's face was turned away from the camera both times, so he got no read there. Naruto was flushed, and his eyes were closed in both. In the second he appeared to be grimacing, potentially in appreciation from the ministrations of the pink-haired woman between his thighs. But potentially not.
The second thing that bothered Itachi was that Naruto was not touching either woman in either of the photos. Naruto was one of the most demonstrably affectionate people that Itachi had ever met, something that had caused no small amount of embarrassment and discomfort to Sasuke and later himself as the blond had become embedded in their lives. He couldn't imagine Naruto having sex with someone and not touching them. Not that he spent a lot of time thinking about his brother-in-law having sex. But he had walked in on enough scenes with Naruto and Sasuke (waaay more than he ever had wanted to know about his little brother) that he was pretty confident in that.
Of course, blinded by shock and hurt, he wouldn't have expected Sasuke to think about details like that. He had at least had the presence of mind to verify the authenticity of the photos, but then had just gone into full-blown Uchiha emotional defense mode. Which basically meant shut down all emotions and destroy the source of the pain with all possible speed and force.
Itachi had called the Hyuuga residence and asked to speak with Hinata, only to be informed that the entire family was off at the Hyuuga country estate for the wedding of one of the clan, and would not be back until the following week. He had left a message on Sakura's answering machine, but had not heard back. He was meeting with Naruto tomorrow to discuss the joint business. But it was not his place to confront Naruto about the photos. If this was going to be resolved, that conversation belonged to Sasuke. But he wasn't concerned. There were other ways of testing the waters with Naruto.
-xXx-
Sasuke stood in the shower, letting the hot water pour over him and loosen his tense muscles. He needed to get his head around what he was really doing with Naruto. What did he want to happen at this point? When he had heard that Naruto was back, he had reacted without thinking. He wanted to see him, so he had gone to the club. But everything that he had felt after that point made no sense. For two years, he had been telling himself that he had wanted to see Naruto so that he could hurt him, to see him suffer. But when he actually had seen him, none of that had been on his mind. He had simply drunk in the sight of his former lover, then left. Why?
He rested his head on the wall of the shower. He still desired Naruto. That was a simple fact he had to accept. He had felt it stir in his stomach as soon as he had seen him, a tension that he had never felt for anyone else. In a way, that was the easiest of all his emotions right now to acknowledge. It meant the least of all of them, powerful though it was. But what he really felt ran much deeper than desire. When he had felt jealousy seeing Naruto with Yahiko, it was not just for the physical intimacy that they clearly had. It was for the way that they were talking, the way Naruto had laughed at something the man had said, the way Naruto had been focused only on Yahiko, not the others that had approached him. The way it had been with Sasuke and Naruto. And Sasuke missed that. Missed simply being with Naruto, hearing the interesting and sometimes stupid things he would say, seeing the room fill with life and energy just because Naruto had entered it. Having someone who wasn't impressed with money or power, but just liked him for who he was. He had always known that Naruto liked him despite his wealth and family name, not because of it. Just as he was sure that Naruto liked Yahiko not because he was influential in the art community, but because of the man himself.
Sasuke seethed at the thought, and was annoyed at himself for it. After all, wasn't he the one who had ended it? Dog in the manger didn't suit him. He was better than that.
But it wasn't ended. Sasuke knew it... probably had always known it on some level. And if he were ruthlessly honest with himself, after two years of being without Naruto and feeling that void acutely, he would want Naruto even if the photos were exactly what they appeared to be. He smiled humorlessly at his own weakness. And if the photos were somehow wrong... Sasuke felt his stomach clench at the thought. He desperately had wanted to believe that Naruto had never betrayed him. But if it were true, and this had all been somehow a trick, then what would he do? He knew just how cruel and ruthless he had been. Is it even possible to make something like that right? Sasuke thought back to the last night they had been together. If Naruto had really been innocent, and Sasuke had ended it that way, there might be no going back. No matter how much you love a person, there are some things that are just unforgivable. And Sasuke knew that what he did probably fit into that category. So then what would he do?
Sasuke stepped out of the shower and dried himself off. He looked at himself objectively in the full length bathroom mirror. His face as it always had been, classical Uchiha features. His arms and abdomen were well defined under the pale smooth skin, his legs strong and toned, without being bulky. His whole life people had told him how flawless his face and form were, had offered him anything just for a chance to fuck him even once. He laughed sneeringly at himself. Of all the people he had chosen to fall in love with, he had picked one of the only ones who would never love him back just for the way he looked and blindly forgive all his sins. He supposed that was one of the main reasons he had been so fixated on Naruto. Naruto had validated Sasuke's self worth separate from his looks or money. When Naruto had befriended him, it had meant that he was worthy of friendship outside of what everyone else used him for. And when Naruto had loved him, it had meant that there was something inside of Sasuke that was worth loving, that was separate from the exterior that everyone else fixated on to the exclusion of anything else he had to offer. That was why the betrayal had hurt so much. Because then it meant that... maybe what was inside Sasuke wasn't worth much after all. Maybe all he was was his looks and family money.
Sasuke didn't know what he hoped for at this point. That the affair had never happened, and he had destroyed the relationship irreparably on his own, or that the affair had happened, and he would have to deal with the fact that he still wanted Naruto anyway. Neither seemed like a particularly happy ending.
He needed to know how Naruto felt. Did he hate him? Miss him? Feel guilty? Had he moved on entirely? Even if things couldn't be the way they were, he was not going to simply let Naruto go again. He knew himself well enough to acknowledge that. He needed to test the waters somewhere neutral to get a better read on how Naruto felt about him at this point. Two years was a long time. But not compared to the amount of time they had been together. Not compared to what they had been to each other. He knew that it would be better to wait until he had talked to Hinata and Sakura, and knew for sure what had happened. But his thoughts were consumed now with visions of Naruto moving on and disappearing again from his life. If he waited too long, the last tie would be cut and there would be nothing left to hold on to. He had looked into the schedule of showings at the art gallery that Suigetsu had mentioned. Naruto's works would be displayed Tuesday. Sasuke would try to track down Sakura before then, but either way, he was going to go see Naruto.
-xXx-
Monday
Naruto walked up to the security desk at Uchiha Corporation, not surprised by the guard's look of shocked recognition. Before the divorce, Sasuke had taken over the running of the corporation while Itachi was in the coma, and Naruto had regularly come by to meet him for lunch or pick him up after work. But it had been two years since anyone had seen the blond in that building. And he knew that word of his arrival would reach the top floor long before he did. He only hoped that Sasuke was not in the building.
Jugo simply nodded when Naruto said he had an appointment with Uchiha Itachi, and called up to Itachi's assistant to let her know Naruto was on his way up. Naruto braced himself for a potential encounter with Sasuke. He had managed to avoid seeing him so far since he had been back, but he knew that eventually they would run into each other. Especially if Naruto spent any time inside a building bearing the man's last name. But he had to get this done. He had signed the divorce papers shortly after arriving back in Japan, and even if he hadn't received official confirmation from Gaara, he was sure that it had gone through smoothly. Someone would have told him if there had been any problems. With the marriage officially over, the jointly owned business was the last string.
He reached the top floor and walked as directly as he could to Itachi's office, politely acknowledging the shocked looks and greetings from people who had known him before, but not staying to talk with anyone. He wasn't back in this office to stay.
He took a deep breath as he was shown into Itachi's office, relieved to see the man was alone and his brother nowhere in sight.
Itachi stood as he entered, his face expressionless, but not hostile. "Naruto," he greeted, his voice smooth and controlled.
Naruto hesitated only a second before walking around the desk and embracing him, earning a not-so-surprised grunt from the typically stoic man.
"Itachi. I am so glad you are awake. God, I missed you. How are you? You look good," Naruto's voice was rough with emotion, his face sincere.
Itachi sighed slightly and gave a small hug back. They had known each other a very long time. "I'm well," was all he said.
Naruto pulled away, looking slightly uncomfortable. "I got back in the country two months ago. I wanted to come to see you right away when I heard you were out of the hospital, but..." he trailed off, and shrugged, sadness etching his features. "You know about Sasuke and me."
Itachi nodded, sitting down and gesturing Naruto to sit as well. "I was sorry to hear about the split," Itachi said sincerely. He carefully studied Naruto's expression. He saw sadness, but not fear or guilt. Naruto's face had always been an open book. And that, more than anything that the man would say to him over the course of the next hour, convinced him that Naruto had never cheated. Naruto had been rather terrified of Itachi when they were younger... as was basically everyone else. And while their relationship had evolved to be closer over the years, if Naruto had really done something to hurt Sasuke, he would be quaking in his shoes to face Itachi now. Naruto definitely had no idea why Sasuke had ended it. There had been no affair. A knot in Itachi's chest released at the knowledge.
"So..." Naruto was fidgeting a little with the sleeves of his shirt, which Itachi noticed were buttoned at the cuff. The collar of his shirt was also buttoned all the way to the top. It was... strange. In all the years that Itachi had known Naruto, the man had never worn his shirts so formally, typically having his sleeves rolled up and his collar unbuttoned at least two or three buttons, claiming he didn't like to be strangled by his own clothing. It had been a constant battle for Sasuke to force Naruto into formal business attire for press conferences or formal meetings, and he was usually out of it as soon as humanly possible. For him to be so buttoned up voluntarily was almost inconceivable. "I wanted to talk to you about buying me out of my share of the business," Naruto began. "With the divorce finalized now, it just doesn't make sense for me to keep it anymore."
"I take it you don't want to sell to Sasuke?" Itachi raised a brow, wanting to see how the blond responded.
"I honestly don't care if you transfer the ownership of my shares to him, or split them, or whatever. Given everything that's happened between me and Sasuke, I'd rather just deal with you for the transaction. After we talk through the basics today, Shikamaru and Gaara can take over and finalize things."
Itachi looked at him thoughtfully. So he isn't out to put Sasuke under my thumb by giving me a controlling majority share of their company. He just wants to avoid Sasuke. There is no vindictiveness in this. He thought again about the sadness in the Naruto's expression, and he seeming lack of desire for revenge. He remembered what Shikamaru had told him about the sleeping pills, and felt a sudden sense of fear twist through him when he looked at Naruto's buttoned cuffs. "Unbutton your cuffs." Itachi said flatly.
"What?" Naruto looked... embarrassed?
"Unbutton your cuffs and roll up your sleeves," Itachi fixed him with a stare that Naruto recognized from back when he and Sasuke would get caught by the older man for something stupid they had done. It was a little disconcerting that it worked as effectively on the 25-year-old Naruto as it had on the 12-year-old Naruto. Blushing even more, Naruto unbuttoned his cuffs and rolled up his sleeves.
Itachi grabbed his arm, and turned them over to look at the underside of his wrists, then breathed out a sigh of relief. No scars or cuts. He relaxed. But he did realize now the reason for Naruto's discomfort. There were bruises encircling his wrists, with the clear imprint of some kind of shackle or handcuff. He gave Naruto an amused smirk.
Still blushing, Naruto undid two of the buttons on his collar, revealing two clearly marked hickies on his collar bone. "Happy? What the fuck, Itachi."
"Why bother to cover that up? We were all living together while you two were in high school. Surely you realize that even with the thick walls of the estate, I knew you were not a virgin anymore," Itachi watched Naruto turning all shades of red, clearly remembering several unfortunate moments when Sasuke and Naruto had thought they were alone in the house (or been too fucking horny to care), and Itachi had walked in on them in various locations and positions.
Naruto made a slightly strangled sound. "I mean... I just thought... since you're Sasuke's brother and all... it would be... awkward."
And it was. At least for Naruto. But then he started to think through his embarrassment and realized that Itachi had not been looking for signs of sex on his wrist. He had been looking for something else. Naruto's embarrassment fled and his stomach dropped. "You know about what happened to me, don't you. How did you find out? Did Sasuke know?" The last question escaped before he could bite it back. If Sasuke had known what had happened to him and where he was, and still hadn't cared enough to even call him, Naruto didn't know what to think.
Itachi caught the undertone of Naruto's last question, and looked Naruto directly in the eye. "Sasuke had no idea you were in the hospital. He still doesn't know what happened. But... he has heard some rumors, and is asking around," Itachi hesitated. It was the first time Naruto could remember seeing the man look uncertain about something. "Naruto. Did you really try to kill yourself?"
Naruto looked down. That was a time in his life he'd rather erase. God, what a mess he'd been. "No. If I really had wanted to do it, I would have found a much more fool-proof way." That didn't comfort Itachi much, but it was something. "Not slitting my wrists, either. I just... was so tired. And I wasn't sleeping. And someone offered me some pills, and I just took some. It was... stupid. I'd never been much for medications, so I had no idea how many to take and I couldn't be bothered to find out. Nothing seemed to matter much at that point to me." He was staring at his hand as he flexed and clenched it, not wanting to look into the onyx eyes and see the disgust he knew must be there for such weakness. "I know it's pretty pathetic right? Boo-hoo, my fucking asshole boyfriend dumped me, so then I just fall apart."
He looked up to see Itachi's gaze waiting for him to look him in the eye. The older man allowed a rare flash of his emotions to show. He looked... sad. But luckily there was no pity. "It's not pathetic. You loved my brother, and you had built your life around him. You were allowed to grieve. Don't be ashamed of that. And you pulled yourself back together, on your own. Even my brother wasn't able to do it without my help. He was slowly drinking himself to death after you left."
Itachi didn't miss the flash of pain and worry that crossed Naruto's face at those words. "Have I told you how fucking glad I am that you are out of that hospital, Itachi?"
Itachi smiled slightly, "I wish I had not been in there when all this happened. Maybe I could have prevented it."
Naruto's face closed up suddenly. "No. There was no preventing this. I was never going to be enough for Sasuke. We'd never been equals. But, it would have been good if it had at least ended differently."
Itachi was watching him carefully again. "So that's why you think Sasuke ended it? Because after all this time he decided that you weren't good enough for him?"
"Sasuke told me that was the reason. He was tired of me. And I wasn't enough."
"And you believed him?"
"Itachi. Don't. You weren't there. You don't know what your brother did. Sasuke can be a total bastard, but up until that week, I had always thought that underneath it all he was a decent person. Someone I admired and respected. But I found out I was wrong. Either he changed, or I never really knew the real him. I could accept that he got tired of me. Honestly, I always kind of wondered what he saw in me. He could have had anyone. And I was no one. But I can't ever get over the way he just evicted me from his life without even a conversation. That all of our years of friendship weren't even worth a fucking discussion about what had gone wrong." Naruto could hear the bitterness in his own voice, and was annoyed by it. It was time to fucking move on, so why was he even talking about this to his ex's brother?
"What if you were wrong."
"What do you mean?"
"What if he had an actual reason for thinking you betrayed him?"
"Then he is an idiot and he should have had the fucking balls to talk to me about it. I would never have betrayed him in anything. And if he doesn't know that, then he never knew me. It doesn't really matter what the reason was, at this point." Naruto ran his hand through his hair. "Look, Itachi, I'm trying to be a good guy here. I am giving you and your brother a chance to buy me out of the business for old time's sake. But if you won't, I'll sell to someone else. I'm done with that company. There is no way in hell I am going back to work there, and I don't like feeling like I am just riding off Sasuke's coattails with the profits. I have a new job that I enjoy, and I want to just start fresh. Have Shikamaru contact Gaara within the next two weeks if you are interested in buying me out. If not, I'll let you know when I find someone who is."
Naruto stood to leave, sad knowing that - realistically - he was not likely to see Itachi again. As much as he had viewed the man as his own brother, it would be unworkable given what had happened with his marriage.
"Itachi, I... I just wanted to say thanks. You were like a real brother to me. And you supported Sasuke and me through so much of our time together. I really wish things had turned out differently. But... I guess it isn't very likely we'll cross paths much anymore." He wouldn't put Itachi in that position, as hard as it was to lose his friendship.
He reached his hand out to the older man, who clasped it in a firm grasp.
"You never know," Itachi said, his expression unreadable. As always.
-xXx-
"Karin!" Suigetsu called out as he saw the redhead heading into her office to start the day.
Karin turned, needing to tell Suigetsu what she had learned from one of her co-workers over the weekend. And she needed to hurry before Suigetsu's mouth got them both fired. She had noticed their boss had just exited his office, most likely to discuss his appointment calendar for the week with his assistant who had just arrived at her desk.
"Did you hear? It finally happened! They were evidently at it all weekend. Yahiko limped into Onyx Sunday night. Limped! Looking smug as hell of course. He said Naruto was in even worse sh-" at that point Karin, who had literally been sprinting across the office, had finally reached him and clamped her hand over his mouth, bodily dragging him into her office and ignoring the rabidly curious stares following them.
Her door slammed, and there were a few moments of murmured voices before a shout was heard through her thick door, "How could Naruto have been married to such a tight-ass as him? Are you fucking serious? What the hell do they even have in common besides both being hot?" There was the sound of someone being pummeled, and a few minutes later a slightly bruised but still shocked looking Suigetsu was walking out of her office, and cheerfully called good morning to his pale, dark-haired boss who had been standing across the hall discussing his morning agenda with his assistant, pretending not to have heard anything. Only his assistant had noticed the white-knuckled death grip that Sasuke had on his folio, and she wisely chose to not address it.
Everyone in the office was torn between relief that the incredibly awkward outbursts of the new head of creative marketing would be over, but disappointed that they would evidently no longer get to hear the latest exploits of their former boss, and secretly gloat at the impact they had on their remaining boss.
Tuesday
Sasuke had been debating whether or not to go into the exhibit at Akatsuki galleries. The earliest Gaara had been willing to give him an appointment on his calendar was Thursday. Sakura had not returned any of his calls, and when he had swung by the hospital where she worked he had been told she had called in sick that day and wasn't available. Hinata was still out of town. But he was sick of waiting around. He had been waiting for two fucking years.
Itachi had told Sasuke about meeting with Naruto to sell his share of the company. And despite the fact that Sasuke had been pushing for almost a year for that exact thing (which Gaara had evidently neglected to even fucking tell Naruto about), Sasuke was now uncertain that he really wanted to buy Naruto out. But he definitely didn't want him selling to some random idiot, either.
So in the end, he found himself standing outside an art gallery at 10 o'clock at night, with people in formal dress going in and out, trying to decide if he should go in and talk to Naruto, and - if so - what the hell he should say to a man he didn't know if he should crucify or abjectly apologize to. It would be a bit of a tricky situation.
. . . .
Naruto stood in the long room full of strangers looking at his paintings. To him, it felt like the emotional equivalent of being stripped naked under flood lights and searched. In fact, he thought he'd probably be more comfortable in that scenario than the one he presently found himself in. At least he had not contacted any of his old friends yet. He had purposely waited until after this exhibit was over before reaching out, not wanting any to feel 'slighted' that he didn't invite them but also really not wanting any of them here. This was personal. He could allow strangers to view this, since they had no context to connect it to and would look at his works more objectively. And he had invited Gaara, who already knew far worse than even what these paintings reflected. But that would be all. None of his friends had been particularly into art, except for maybe Neji and Sasuke who had the wealth to collect some of the classics, but they would never attend something like this. Naruto breathed a small laugh. This was not nearly high society enough to attract either of them, so he should be safe.
His eyes darted periodically to Yahiko, glaring at the man who had talked him into this. Yahiko smiled serenely back. Fuck him. Naruto glanced at the clock. In less than an hour, he could leave. Thank fucking god.
He felt a tension between his shoulder blades, as though someone was staring at him. He slowly turned, praying it would not be someone he knew. Only to be confronted by the specter of the absolute last person he wanted to see here.
"Sasuke," he said, not moving from his spot in the middle of the gallery, watching as the man who had ripped his life to pieces two years ago walked casually towards him, a smirk on his beautiful face. Naruto felt completely frozen. He was not prepared for this. Not here. Why the fuck did Sasuke have to find him here? What could he possibly want?
Naruto fought the urge to look to Yahiko. He didn't need help dealing with his past. He was strong enough to put on a polite social mask in public, and not make a scene. But his shock was slowly melting away into a bubbling anger that swirled just beneath the surface. Sasuke had some fucking balls to just walk in here and give me that look, as though he had any right to be involved in my life anymore. Naruto wasn't practiced at hiding his emotions. But that didn't mean he couldn't do it if he really tried. So he focused on schooling all his feelings of confusion, anger, and hurt from his face. He thought of the meditation techniques that Sifu Shima had taught him for calming the mind. If Sasuke wanted to play mind games, Naruto could too. By the time Sasuke had reached him, Naruto was fully in control of himself again.
"Slumming it, Sasuke?" Naruto said lazily, allowing a cynical smile to twist his lips. "I wouldn't have thought something so far beneath you would warrant your interest."
Surprise and wariness flashed across Sasuke's otherwise stoic features. Cynicism wasn't something he was used to seeing from Naruto. He had expected a major explosion of some kind, or Naruto ignoring him completely.
"Actually, I heard from Suigetsu that you were having a showing here tonight." Sasuke smiled as Naruto was startled out of his mask of indifference. If it was a game of emotional control and mind fucking that they were playing, Sasuke had a clear advantage in this arena. "Oh, you didn't know? He works for us now. The new head of creative marketing. Started last week."
Naruto processed what the loud-mouthed Suigetsu knew about his new life, and the probability that he had told the entire office once he found out Naruto used to work there. Naruto was able to keep the stream of cursing internal rather than giving it voice, but the amused look on Sasuke's face showed that the man clearly knew what Naruto was thinking anyway.
"I hear you are into taking interesting wagers at bars now," Sasuke continued, watching as Naruto's posture shifted slightly into a subtly aggressive stance, his eyes were narrowed. Sasuke could feel a coiled tension pumping off Naruto's body, and his own body's immediate response as he mirrored Naruto's aggressive posture. God, Sasuke had missed this. Just this. Everyone else in his life always deferred to him, paid lip service and agreed to whatever he wanted. But never Naruto. Naruto would just go headlong into a conflict with him, never batting an eye to things like 'station' or 'deference'. It had always been this way between the two of them. This instant combat readiness and battle for dominance between two equals. When they were young, it had been physical. Then they matured, and it became verbal. Then they became lovers, and it became physical again, but in a different way. No matter who won, the arguments they had ended in the same way. Sex between them was always amazing, but the sex when they fought was... unbelievable. Sasuke had to remind himself forcibly that this was not going to end that way, but he couldn't help the jump of pure lust that shot through him as his body remembered this feeling exactly. God, it had been too long since anyone had made him feel so alive.
"Yeah, well. I've found a lot of new things to entertain me over the past two years. The freedom has been amazing and... liberating." Naruto said and smiled, seeing he had scored a direct hit with this comment. Sasuke visibly tensed and his onyx eyes narrowed dangerously. Naruto was barely able to contain a wolfish grin, but he knew that this type of battle with Sasuke was dangerous... neither of them were fully rational when it came to the other. They never had been. Which meant he needed to bring this to a close quickly and get the hell out of here.
"But I'm sure you didn't come here to discuss my sex life, or my other new hobbies. And clearly the art here would be below your standards. So let's cut to the chase, Sasuke. What do you want?"
Sasuke blinked at the direct but controlled verbal assault. Naruto had evidently been working on self-control if nothing else since they had been apart.
Sasuke smirked as he thought about ways he could answer Naruto's question completely truthfully. But he held back on actually voicing it, knowing that it would just put Naruto's defenses up even more. He settled on another truth that Naruto might find more compelling.
"Itachi told me you are planning on selling your share of the business. We have had a difficult time finding suitable replacements for the roles that you had played in the business, given that you left so abruptly and there was no time to transition someone in properly. Before you sell, I was hoping that you could come back and spend a few months training your replacements so we can have the business performing optimally again. That way, you can get top dollar for your share. And of course, the employees who also have shares in the company will benefit."
Naruto didn't know what to say. Of everything that he had expected to come out of Sasuke's mouth, this hadn't even made the list. Fucking bastard. He always knows how to get what he wants. But the problem was that Naruto really didn't know what Sasuke wanted anymore. He had seen the flash of lust when they had been verbally sparring earlier. But he also remembered the way that Sasuke had looked at him that last night they were together, when he had completely broken him. Even if Sasuke still wanted Naruto in that way, it by no means meant that they didn't simultaneously want to destroy him. Naruto searched Sasuke's face, trying to read his motivation for this. But he couldn't be sure. After everything that had happened the last time they met, he no longer had any faith that he had ever really known how to read this man in the first place.
Sasuke saw the hesitation on his face, and simply waited, knowing that once he had put it in terms of him being needed to help the employees that Naruto had befriended and supported, Sasuke had won. It was now just a matter of waiting for Naruto to acknowledge it.
"We'll see. I'll call Kiba and discuss it with him," Naruto said noncommittally, hating the smug look that appeared at his words. Sasuke clearly knew that this was already a done deal.
But Naruto was going to make it clear exactly what he was coming back for. A small, cold smile ghosted across Naruto's lips, the expression again seeming so foreign on his face. Naruto walked the three steps that brought him just alongside his former lover, resting his hand on the man's shoulder.
"But just to be clear Sasuke, if I come back for a bit it's not going to be to play secretary and the boss with you, nah? If you don't like the replacements that Kiba hired, just go and have him update the profile and find someone more to your taste," he spoke low, directly into Sasuke's ear.
Sasuke felt the heat from Naruto's breath against his neck go straight to his groin. And then Naruto was gone, walking across the room to speak with a man with red hair and multiple piercings. Yahiko. God, how Sasuke hated that name.
Sasuke slowly smiled. He looked at Naruto, who just happened to glance up at that exact moment and smile at him.
He raised a single black eyebrow in response. Two could play at this game. Naruto might remember all his buttons. But he remembered Naruto's. He would bide his time. He knew he'd be seeing Naruto again soon.
Sasuke didn't want to seem as though he had been 'dismissed' by Naruto. And he had some real curiosity to see what his friend had painted while he had been gone. Naruto's paintings, like his expressive face, had always been amazing works of art that reflected the depth of his emotions and experiences. In the past, most of his pieces had involved Sasuke. He was curious, and a bit hesitant, to see what Naruto had focused on without him.
The first painting he saw appeared to be some sort of cityscape. It was bright and colorful, but somehow managed to be disturbing and surreal at the same time. As though the cheerful colors were somehow mocking the observer. Sasuke frowned a bit and moved on to another one. He froze, staring into a pair of eyes in the center of the canvass that he recognized instantly, their onyx hue being the same he saw in the mirror every morning. But these were filled with hate and disgust, set not in a face but in a dark eddy of black and brown and red that made Sasuke feel almost dizzy with its subtle swirling effect. Sasuke looked at the title of the piece. The Ending. He stood there, unable to move. Had his eyes really looked like that? He supposed they had. He felt a little queasy about this vision of himself being so embedded in Naruto's memory that he had been able to paint it like this, even if he had felt Naruto deserved it. The pain of that night was captured so completely in this painting that Sasuke almost couldn't look away. He didn't notice the two pairs of eyes that watched his every reaction. He took a step back from the painting, and drew a breath, trying to gather himself.
He walked to the next one. It was simply titled 'Tired'. It seemed at first to be a fairly innocent scene of a bedroom, but in the same way that the cityscape had been disturbing, this one also had undertones that bothered the observer. The very bright but somehow out of focus and disorienting view from the window, the heavy darkness that seemed to hang in the room. But what had the hair rising on Sasuke's arms was they way that the painting drew the eye to a small bottle of pills on the nightstand in the corner of the painting. They seemed somehow sinister. Sasuke looked closer, and saw that the label had been painted to clearly show that they were sleeping pills. Several scattered across the table.
Sasuke jerked as he felt someone standing along side of him. He turned, expecting to see Naruto, wanting to demand he explain what the sickening feeling was that he had sensed in this painting. He was met with jade green eyes, looking at him measuringly. Gaara. Sasuke glanced around the room, looking for Naruto, but not finding him. He noticed Yahiko watching him from a few feet away, his expression similar to Gaara's. Sasuke forced himself to take a deep breath. He needed to know what had happened. Itachi had told him to ask Gaara.
"You know what happened, don't you?" Sasuke asked Gaara. "Something bad. Something I caused. I need to... I need to know."
Gaara continued to observe Sasuke without speaking. When Sasuke thought maybe the man was just going to ignore him, he finally spoke. "Yes. You need to know. When you threw Naruto out two years ago, he went to stay with his godfather. He basically stopped eating for about two months, and ended up taking an overdose of sleeping pills. He almost died. You almost killed him."
Sasuke felt like he had just been punched in the stomach. He saw a chair over at the end of the aisle, and stumbled to it and sat down, lowering his head into his hands. "I didn't know. I never wanted..." He stopped, not even sure what to say. For so long, all he had wanted was to see Naruto suffer. But now that he knew how much he had, he couldn't bear it. Even if Naruto had cheated, he hadn't wanted this. If Naruto had died... Sasuke's brain simply stopped functioning at the thought. He looked up and saw both Yahiko and Gaara standing before him.
"Where is Naruto?" Sasuke asked, his eyes slightly glazed. "I need to talk to him."
Yahiko looked at him, his expression neutral. "He left shortly after you came in. He doesn't want to talk to you right now. He wasn't expecting you to be here."
Sasuke nodded. He had no idea that this was what the paintings would be. He understood how exposed Naruto must have felt. He had masked it well... better than he ever used to be able to. "I won't go to him tonight, then." As hard as that was for Sasuke to say, he knew it was the least he could do to give his friend time. "But, I want to see him. We need to talk."
"When Naruto is ready to talk to you, I'm sure he knows where to find you. At this point, you have no right to force your way back into his life, even if you regret what you did before," Yahiko's eyes didn't leave his.
Gaara stepped closer, leaning down and speaking in a low voice. "You might look sad now, finding out that you broke Naruto to the extent that you did. But don't think for a moment that I don't know that you fully intended to hurt him at the time," Sasuke turned to see cold green eyes piercing him. "And I am going to tell you something, Sasuke. If you do any more damage to him, anything that sends him back into that spiral, I will take power of attorney from Naruto and do what he should have done from the beginning. I will come after you for everything you've got and I will fucking bury you." With that, the redhead turned and walked out of the room.
-xXx-
Naruto closed the door to his apartment and leaned his back against it, slowly blowing out his breath as he slid down the door and sat on the floor. Holy fuck. He had not been prepared for this. It had been his absolute worst case scenario to have Sasuke show up at the gallery. Naruto hadn't stuck around to see if Sasuke had looked at the paintings, or what his reaction had been. And he had no desire to ever find out. Whether it was gloating or pity, he didn't want either.
Naruto played the conversation back through his mind. He still couldn't figure out what Sasuke was after. Sasuke didn't vacillate. Once he decided something, it was final. There is no way in hell that Sasuke had somehow changed his mind about Naruto not being good enough for him and now wanted him back. Sasuke wouldn't have ended it they way he did if there had been any doubt in his mind at all. But the lust he had seen in Sasuke's eyes had been real. That was something that even Sasuke had never been able to conceal from him. It was one of the few true levers of power that Naruto had always held over the man. The other had been trust, but that was clearly gone now, on both sides.
So what was this? Was Sasuke truly still not satisfied with the pound of flesh he had already extracted from Naruto's soul? Was it just morbid curiosity to see what Naruto had done without him? Did he think somehow that they could try to become friends again after everything that had happened?
Naruto was exhausted. And he was angry, but mostly at himself. After everything that bastard had done for him, how could he still feel what he had at the mere sight of him? When he had seen Sasuke standing there, looking at him, with that smirk... everything that Naruto had tried to bury had come flooding back. After all that had happened, how could he still want the man who had crushed him? How could he still care about the rumors he had heard about Sasuke's drinking problem? Why couldn't he just let it go?
And the worst thing was that he knew he couldn't. He was going to go back to their company. He would still force himself to sell it. This wouldn't be permanent. But he couldn't resist the opportunity to spend just a small bit more of time with Sasuke. And even now, in the calm and privacy of his own home, he knew exactly where this was likely to lead and he knew it was a stupid and self-destructive path.
But when had anything about their relationship been logical? It had always been obsessive and explosive and irresistible. Jiraya had been wrong. He was not ready to be back in Japan. He should have stayed in Spain.
-xXx-
Wednesday
When Sasuke came home from work that evening, he found a letter taped to his door. He took it inside, opening it as he stepped out of his shoes and set his briefcase down. He began to read. By the time he got to the end, he was white and shaking.
He pulled out his phone and dialed. "Itachi - I need Naruto's address. I know you have it."
. . . .
Sasuke-kun
I know you are finally looking into the photo and the hotel ledgers. So eventually you will figure out what happened. I want you to know that by the time you read this, I have left Japan. I am going somewhere where no one has ever heard of the mighty Uchiha Sasuke, and I am going to start over and finally be happy. It's funny. When I had the opportunity to take that video and print a few pictures from it, at most I thought I would be able to cause a small fight between you and Naruto. I wasn't even sure that would work, because everyone knows how honest Naruto is, and how much he loved you. I figured probably you wouldn't even believe it, but was hoping it would give you at least a small taste of hurt. Like you had hurt me countless times before.
Imagine my utter shock when you just up and divorced him, without even a discussion. I have to admit that I felt terrible for Naruto. I hadn't meant to hurt him with this. Even though he rejected me, too, I know that I had rejected him first. I know I had been terrible to him when he was growing up, in my single-minded obsession with you. And by the time I was old enough to realize that he was by far the better man, you had already claimed him. Like everything else. Whatever Uchiha Sasuke wants, he gets. And the rest of the world be damned.
I even considered going to him and telling him what I'd done when I heard that you had actually DIVORCED him on the spot. But he was gone and no one knew where. It wouldn't have mattered anyway though. Because you would never have let him explain.
Because finally, FINALLY, you had made a mistake. An enormous one. And even if you show this to Naruto now, the damage will be undoable. You didn't trust him enough. Anyone who knew Naruto at all would have known immediately this was a lie. Because if there is one decent human being left on this earth, it is Naruto. You were his husband, and you somehow missed that simple fact. And then your enormous pride wouldn't let him defend himself. And you made sure he knew about all the lovers you took, showing him you didn't miss him. So now it will be too late.
And I am filled with glee. You arrogant, selfish bastard. I hope you suffer. I hope you regret. I hope you beg for his forgiveness and he squashes you. Because I want you to feel what you have made me and countless others that you deemed unworthy feel.
I hate you, and I hope you rot in hell.
Sakura
-xXx-
Naruto heard a knocking on his door. It was late for unexpected company, after 9pm. Frowning, he went and opened the door. And froze.
Sasuke just stood there, looking at him. "Can we talk?"
Naruto just stood there, still frozen. He had felt so emotionally exposed from yesterday's exhibit that he had literally spent the entire day just locked in his apartment, trying to regain his sense of privacy and restore his emotional equilibrium. The very last person he was prepared to talk to in this universe had shown up on his doorstep. How did Sasuke even know where he lived? But of course. This was Sasuke.
Naruto forced his brain to come up with something to say that would end this conversation as quickly and painlessly as possible. There was only one possible reason that Sasuke was here. "Look, I told Itachi that any decision to buy me out should go through Shikamaru and Gaara. I don't want to do the negotiations any other way. And if I decide to come back and train my replacements, I will work that through Kiba, not you. If you don't like who Kiba hired to replace me, then take it up with him."
"Naruto," Sasuke took a step towards the door, but Naruto didn't back away to allow him entry. "That's not what I'm here to talk about."
Anger began bubbling within Naruto. "What else could there possibly be for us to discuss, Sasuke? I think that you pretty much said all there was to say that night two years ago."
Naruto saw the flash of pain and guilt in the onyx eyes, but steeled himself against it. "It's too late now if you've decided you've become 'un-bored' with me. We both signed the fucking divorce papers that you wanted so badly. The company is the last thread and I'm trying to move that along, too, but I won't do this with you directly. It's a legal matter. Let the lawyers do their jobs."
A door down the hallway opened, and one of Naruto's neighbors walked out, clearly dressed for the night club. She eyed Sasuke appreciatively, slowing her steps to see if he were going inside, or potentially leaving with her.
"I don't want to do this in the hallway. There is something I need to show you. I want to explain -"
"Fine," Naruto's eyes narrowed, and Sasuke wasn't sure if it was because he was annoyed at being somewhat forced to let him in, or annoyed at the girl who was clearly checking him out.
Naruto walked into the kitchen, leaning against the counter crossing his arms across his chest. Sasuke glanced around the apartment. It smelled of Naruto, a warm, earthy scent. Sasuke took a deep breath, trying to both fill himself with it and steel himself against its effects. As expected, the apartment was full of vibrant colors. He felt a small twist in his chest as he recognized the orange couch. There were paintings, all Naruto's, on the wall. Some were landscapes of what looked to be European cities, children playing soccer, and a tiny old man in a dojo. There were sketches - faces that Sasuke didn't recognize, but he knew must have some importance to Naruto. It hit him suddenly how much things had changed. For almost their entire lives, they had shared their friends, experiences, thoughts... there was no event that had happened in Naruto's life that Sasuke was not either a part of or at least knew about. But that had all changed, and Sasuke found it disorienting. He had stayed in the same place, with the same people, doing the same thing. Naruto had - changed.
"Nice place," Sasuke offered, trying to start the conversation in a neutral fashion while getting his bearings. So much was riding on what happened in the next ten minutes. He didn't want to fuck this up if there was any chance at all.
Naruto snorted. "Cut the shit, Sasuke. Compared to your place, I'm sure this is a dump. Just like anything of mine has always been relative to yours. Just tell me what you want and let's get this over with."
Sasuke's eyes widened and the uncharacteristically biting words from Naruto. He didn't miss the underlying sense of bitterness in the blond's voice. He was clearly hoping to push Sasuke into an argument that would give him the right to throw him out and end the conversation. In the past it might have worked. Naruto had always been the only one able to get under his skin instantly like that. But too much was riding on this now. And he remembered what Itachi had said about Naruto never really understanding what Sasuke had seen in him in the first place. He had to tread lightly here.
"That's not true. I never felt that way, Naruto." Sasuke let his guard down so Naruto could read the sincerity in his eyes.
Naruto searched his face for a second, then let his gaze drop. "Just get to the point, Sasuke. You didn't come all the way here to discuss my apartment."
Sasuke realized there was not going to be a smooth way to bring this up, so he just pulled out the folder he had brought with him and handed it to Naruto. "I received these the day after I left for Okinawa. And the letter I received this morning. I wanted you to know -" Sasuke blew out a short breath as Naruto opened the folder and saw the photos, shock evident on his face. Shock. But not guilt. "I wanted you to know why I filed for divorce. The real reason."
Naruto just stared at the photos, frozen. He flipped quickly through the hotel ledgers, then finally read the note from Sakura. The small hairs on Sasuke's arms stood up when Naruto began to laugh.
"You fucking... you fucking bastard!" The shift from laughing to blazing anger caused Sasuke to tense, and he forced himself not to take a step back. "God Sakura is completely right about you. If you had just fucking asked me about this. I told you I had gotten food poisoning that night and -"
He snapped his head up to look Sasuke directly in the eyes, shoving the papers back at him. "You ass. You fucking coward! You threw away our entire marriage because you couldn't bring yourself to fucking ask me-" Without warning, Naruto threw a punch that caught Sasuke directly in the jaw. Sasuke's head snapped back and he staggered a step back, but didn't even try to dodge or block it. He just stood there, arms at his sides, eyes searing into Naruto's.
"Get out," Naruto's voice was shaking with emotion.
"Naruto -"
"I said get out!" Naruto was walking towards him, his body shaking with the clear need to physically restrain himself from hitting Sasuke again. "I can't talk to you right now. I don't want to end up in jail for beating the fuck out of you if you aren't going to even defend yourself. Get out."
Sasuke hesitated, but walked to the door, opening it, knowing Naruto deserved time to sort out his own feelings. Nothing good would come of pushing him on it right now. "I'll leave for now. But we need to talk about this, Naruto. This conversation isn't over."
"It's over for tonight," Naruto said, placing a hand on Sasuke's chest and pushing him into the hall, then slamming the door, the lock snicking closed. Sasuke stood there, his jaw throbbing; he winced as he heard the sound of something loud and heavy crash against the wall and break.
This could definitely have gone better. But then again, it could have gone worse. Naruto had essentially agreed to talk to him about this again later. Sasuke was going to make sure that later was not very far away.
-xXx-
to be continued...
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The Thin Line Between Love and Hate - COMPLETE