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Blindsided	By : nescione Category: Naruto > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 1138 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 2
- 3
- 4
This chapter is a little shorter than the others, even if it took me just as long. But hey, look! Sasuke! Standard warnings and disclaimers apply; random facts and self-indulgent babble located at the end. Enjoy.
Blindsided: Chapter 3

In which Kakashi is a brat but Jiraiya is worse, Naruto evinces a few pyromaniac tendencies, and Sasuke realizes that his decision making abilities are suspect.
Tsunade and Jiraiya took the back way into the village, through the mountain. She collapsed the tunnel behind them without a word; they could take no chances during wartime, and she didn't have the manpower to waste guarding every single tunnel and rabbit hole.
They entered her office through the window; she dismissed the clone slumped over her desk and sat down. "I'm tired of this. I knew what I was getting into when you brought me back, but I'm tired of war." She stared at the paperwork on her desk, frustrated. "I'm too old for this."
"We all are; hell, the kids are too old for this." Jiraiya stood behind her and carefully placed his hands on her shoulders. When she didn't pull away, he began massaging out the knots of tension.
If nothing else, that was an indication of how bad things had gotten: Tsunade never allowed Jiraiya to touch her, otherwise. She knew he was using the opportunity to stare down her shirt again, but she just didn't care.
"Sometimes I want to tell Orochimaru that I'm done. We'll settle everything with a coin toss- heads, he gets the village; tails, he comes home and waits tables in drag at that seedy Anbu bar, the way you two did when we were kids."
Jiraiya snorted. "I remember that bet. My feet were killing me by the end of the night, and he got hit on way too much for comfort. That was the first and only time you beat us at cards- I don't think he ever forgave you for that." He didn't mention that Nawaki had died only a week after that night; instead, he grinned and slid his hands a little further down her shoulders than necessary. "We should go back there for drinks sometime, for old time's sake."
"We should." She rolled her eyes and firmly removed his hands from her blouse by the simple expedient of knocking him into the wall with a backhand. "For old time's sake, not a date. Pervert."
"Can't blame me for trying," he laughed, rubbing his jaw.
"Of course I can. I've been doing it for years, why should I stop now?" She took out Naruto's hitai-ate and traced the leaf insignia on the metal plate. She shook her head and folded it carefully, to hide the way her hands were shaking. It disappeared into the back of a drawer.
There was a knock on the door; Kakashi strode in a moment later, followed by a slightly frantic Shizune. The jounin's eyebrow lifted when he saw Jiraiya standing behind Tsunade's desk, and he allowed Shizune to shoulder him out of the way.
"Tsunade-hime, I told him you weren't to be disturbed-"
"It's alright, Shizune. You can go, I'll deal with him." Her assistant ducked out; Tsunade leaned back in her chair. She wondered how long Kakashi had been sitting in the hallway, waiting for her chakra signature to shift on the other side of the door. "Your request is denied, Kakashi. For the fourth time today. Go home," she said firmly, before he could speak.
"You know I would do more good out there than I have been. You can't afford to play favorites right now." Kakashi placed his hands on her desk, voice even.
He always tried to sound so reasonable; they'd been playing this game for weeks. Rolling her eyes heavenward for patience, Tsunade cracked her knuckles. "As flattering to your ego as it might be to think so, I'm not actually playing favorites. The Anbu need new members too much for me to play favorites when it comes to new recruits. But if you keep badgering me, I'll have to issue a formal statement, which requires paperwork- and I hate paperwork."
Kakashi met her glare with a pleading, one-eyed gaze. "Please?"
First he tried being reasonable, then he tried being cute. Kakashi was getting predictable, and that alone would have been a perfectly sound reason for her to deny him reinstatement. "No. You're of more use to me in your current position. I'm not going to indulge you just because you feel the childish need to prove yourself on the battlefield- and it's useless now. Orochimaru has called a cease-fire."
That actually stopped him short; of all the excuses Tsunade could have given him, Kakashi hadn't been expecting that one. "You don't really believe he'll hold to that, do you? Hokage-sama," he added, belatedly.
"She doesn't have a choice." Jiraiya crossed his arms and leaned against the wall.
"Oh, so now you're on my side?" She shot Jiraiya a narrow eyed glare. "I'm not putting you back in the Anbu- and if you ask me one more time, I'll put you on suspension from all duties for the next three weeks. Do not try my patience, Kakashi."
"You're being unreasonable, Hokage-sama," he said blandly, still leaning over the desk. "We both know there are precedents for reinstatement, particularly during wartime-"
"Only if my life is being threatened, which it isn't, and only if I felt like perpetuating the stupid, elitist stereotypes that are associated with the Anbu, which I don't." She reached up and hooked two fingers under Kakashi's chin, forcing his head up at a painful angle. "But it doesn't matter in the end, because, to be perfectly blunt, I would have to be as insane as you are to allow someone with your psych profile back into the Anbu. This conversation is over." She used her two-fingered grip on his jaw to fling him away from her desk.
"Jiraiya, do something with him." She shuffled some of the papers on her desk, refusing to meet his eye.
"Here, kid." Jiraiya pulled a lurid looking orange book out of his coat and walked to the door. "It's the new edition. Fetch!" He opened the door and threw it down the hall, where a slightly startled Anbu guard caught it.
The glare Kakashi gave Jiraiya would have caused a lesser man to spontaneously combust, "We'll talk about this later, Hokage-sama."
"No, we won't. Get out." Tsunade didn't even look up from her desk.
The Copy-nin gave her one last hard look and turned to the Anbu outside. "Ah, excuse me, Anbu-san? I believe that's mine." He plucked the paperback out of the tiger-masked man's hands. "Thank you. Nice catch, by the way."
"One grows accustomed to having objects thrown at one's head when one works for the Godaime." The Anbu, though polite, couldn't keep the wry humor out of his voice.
"Mm-hm." In keeping with his image, Kakashi had already opened the book and begun reading as he slouched down the hallway. "Oh, Anbu-san?"
"Yes, Kakashi-san?" The guard paused in the doorway of Tsunade's office.
"When do you get off duty?"
"In three hours, Kakashi-san."
"Ah." Kakashi's slouch became more pronounced as he paused at the end of the hall. "I'll see you later, then."
"Yes, Kakashi-san." He stepped into the office and shut the door firmly behind him. "Hokage-sama, Jiraiya-sama. You really shouldn't tease Kakashi like that."
"He brings it on himself." Jiraiya leaned against the windowsill and looked out at the village. "He's always been too serious for his own good."
The Anbu scratched the back of his head thoughtfully. "I'm not sure that's the adjective I would have used, but if you say so..."
"Stupid is the one I usually use." Tsunade said, looking irritable. "Or arrogant. You made good time coming back, Tiger. The tunnel leading to that lookout station has been closed off; issue a notice to the rest of the Anbu, and take the outer perimeter guards off rotation. You can take off early today, but tomorrow I'll need you to take Falcon, Hawk, and Deer on a perimeter before Naruto's paperwork goes through."
"With all due respect, Godaime-sama, tomorrow is my day off, and nothing short of Orochimaru standing outside the gates with an army is going to make me give it up." He pushed his mask up, revealing a scarred face and a wide grin. "But I'll take that early dismissal."
She grimaced, caught between irritation and amusement. "I can see why Sarutobi held you in such high esteem." Aside from his ability to deal with upper level academy students and the flawless state of his paperwork, Iruka was also remarkably good at getting his own way- he had a con man's smile.
From the window, Jiraiya snorted. "He raised a village of brats, you mean."
Iruka shrugged and smiled disarmingly. "Everyone's been run ragged lately. I promised my landlady I'd help her with the repairs from the last aerial raids- and anyway, Falcon doesn't like me."
"He doesn't like anyone," Tsunade grumbled. She shuffled some papers on her desk ineffectually. "And with good reason, but that's beside the point. Alright, you can go- stay out of trouble and keep your mouth shut about Naruto. People will start asking questions when they see Jiraiya at the bath house again."
"Of course, Hokage-sama." If he was at all insulted by her apparent low regard for his powers of discretion, he didn't show it.
Tsunade snorted. "Would it kill you to react honestly to anything, Iruka?"
"It might, at that." He sounded thoughtful. "Have a nice day, Hokage-sama." He bowed and disappeared in a puff.
"You're recruiting Anbu from the schoolteachers, but you won't let Kakashi back in the ranks?" Jiraiya frowned. "Are you sure his psych profile fits?"
"Iruka isn't a teacher anymore- which is why he isn't suitable for anything but Anbu. Kakashi doesn't actually want to be reinstated- on some level, he knows it's a stupid idea. He's just miffed that Iruka was recruited, and that I won't tell him why. It isn't any of his business, and he hates that."
Jiraiya shook his head. "Brats, all of them."
"Brats they may be, but they're Konoha's best hope." She turned to the window again. No matter how often she looked, the view never got old. It was her village, and she would do what she had to to keep it safe. "And I have a feeling we're going to need every last one of them by the time this is over and done with."
xxxxxxx
Naruto knew Tsunade didn't want him going after Orochimaru, which was why he wasn't heading directly to Sound. He was just taking a little detour on his way to Suna, one that would take him a little closer to Rice Country than necessary. Besides, Naruto reasoned, what Tsunade doesn't know can't hurt her, and I'm a missing nin no matter what I do now. He didn't really want to go to Sand; he wanted to go home. But as long as that wasn't an option, he wanted to be doing something. He hadn't spent three years training to sit on his ass in the desert; he was looking for a fight.
I didn't even get to see Iruka-sensei, or Sakura-chan. I didn't get to ask if everyone was alright. He remembered Neji and Chouji's still bodies after that first, abortive attempt to retrieve Sasuke; the thought of that happening to them again, or to any of his friends, his precious people, made his vision go red at the edges.
A faint whistle distracted him from his thoughts; it was the only warning he had before a rain of needles flew through the air. Six of them connected with his shoulder, covered in an oily sheen. A louder, shrill whistle pierced the air, and three ninja wearing Sound hitai-ate appeared in the trees, surrounding him.
"Don't try to resist, Uzumaki. That nerve toxin will have you completely incapacitated in a matter of moments."
The speaker was a girl with short red hair, goggles, and a mocking grin. The hand she lifted to readjust her goggles with had another set of needles clenched between its knuckles. Her teammates were similarly armed with senbon and kunai, their weapons all coated in the same unhealthy sheen.
Shit! His arm was completely numb, and the numbness was spreading. Naruto gritted his teeth and slid off the branch, falling in a controlled tumble against the tree trunk. The ground was a long way away, but the underbrush swallowed him up when he hit. He just needed to buy a few moments, and then he'd be fine.
Without his hands, he couldn't summon enough power to fight the poison; he had to go directly to the source. He just needed a little time...
"Hiding won't do you any good, Uzumaki!" The girl's voice rang through the trees. "In a few minutes, your whole body will shut down. Orochimaru-sama will be pleased to see you; he didn't think Konoha was going to give you up so easily. He didn't expect your Hokage to send you right into our hands!"
Oh, sure, rub it in, why don't you. His Hokage was going to be pissed when she found out he'd disobeyed direct orders. Maybe next time I'll actually listen to her...maybe. He flattened himself against the ground, trusting the undergrowth to hide him as he heard the Sound nin approaching. Wake up, you stupid mutt, I need help!
It was hard to concentrate with the pins and needles paralysis racing through his limbs, but the smell of blood on the air made it that much easier to drop into that quasi-meditative state that let him talk to the Kyuubi.
What now? I was napping.
Lazy bastard! I can't move, give me some help here! Orochimaru's stupid flunkies poisoned us, and they want to bring us back to Sound. He shoved an image of Orochimaru doing that creepy tongue thing at the fox, trying to convey the urgency of the situation.
You can't do anything without my help, can you? The answering snarl was tinged with fire and anger and frustration. Naruto whimpered as the fury in it burned his skull. Fine.
Fox fire ran through his veins, burning away the poison. He flexed his fingers, pulling in air in huge, hoarse gasps. "Finally. Kage bunshin!" Three clones popped into existence, all of them crackling with demonic chakra. The four of him left gouges in the tree trunks as they ran back up to the canopy. Fire gathered around their claws as they passed by three very startled looking Sound nin.
He managed to hit one of them with a kunai on the way up; he heard the scream and smelled blood and fear. The fox was running hot and heavy through his veins, and he saw everything through six different shades of red and the smell of blood was making him crazy. One of his clones went up in smoke, courtesy of another rain of needles.
He met up with his remaining clones above the canopy. He grabbed one by the ankle and launched it back into the fray with the help of the other, then followed it down with a handful of shuriken. The clone missile flew straight and true, a kunai clutched in each fist. The ninja he'd tagged on his way up managed to avoid a direct hit, but he was still caught on the edge of the blast when the clone exploded. The Sound nin fell off the tree, shaken loose by the explosion; Naruto listened to the drawn out doppler effect of his scream, and grinned. The Kyuubi purred.
More. His voice was thick with hunger and bloodlust.
Hey, be patient. One down, two to go. The chakra that he gathered in the palm of his hand was laced with threads of red and yellow; the grin his final clone gave him was bestial. The second Sound nin tried to stop him with more kunai, but Kyuubi's chakra blew them all away.
"Dodama Rasengan!" The Sound nin didn't even have time to scream. That was one of the things Naruto liked about his over-the-top, chakra-wasting techniques: you didn't have to clean up as much when your enemies were vaporized. His clone disappeared along with his opponent, and the surge of satisfaction that came from the fox was nearly obscene.
"You son of a bitch!" The girl stared at the crater in the side of the tree where her teammate had been, and clung to the side of a tree with trembling hands. "I'll make you pay for that!"
"You and what army?" Naruto shouted back. This was just a scouting party- a bunch of amateurs. They didn't belong this close to Konoha, and they were no match for him.
Another set of needles whistled past Naruto's ear, coming from behind him. He let the chakra on his feet slide a little to face this new attack- and found himself stuck, tangled in wires he could not see. The watery twilight confused his fox eyes more so than darkness would have; the shadows were confusing.
"A proper ninja needs only his skills, not an army, Naruto-kun." A polite voice spoke from behind Naruto.
Naruto knew that voice- and so did the Kyuubi, who responded with a roar of anger that made his head ring. He couldn't see the wires, but he didn't need to be able to see them to set them on fire. Droplets of molten metal left scorch marks on Naruto's skin as he wrenched himself free just in time to dodge even more wire-threaded senbon.
"Very good, Naruto-kun. Your control of the Kyuubi has improved since the last time we fought."
He landed on a lower branch and turned to face his new attacker, snarling. "Kabuto." A ribbon of red-gold chakra wound around his fist.
The medic-nin's glasses glinted in the fading sunlight. "Matsuba-kun, recover your teammates' bodies, if there is anything to be recovered. We've wasted enough time in this area."
"He killed Aizawa and Kei! And Orochimaru-sama ordered his capture!" Matsuba shouted at Kabuto. "You're just going to let him go?"
"Huh? You're letting me go?" Startled, Naruto let go of the chakra he was winding. If he was being honest with himself, he knew Kabuto might still be out of his league- but that didn't keep him from wanting to rip the traitor's face off.
We could take him. Devour his flesh and drink his chakra, pour libations of blood at the foot of the trees. There was something of the moon in Kyuubi's voice; Naruto slammed his fist into a tree trunk to distract himself. Kabuto gave him a condescending smile.
Shut up, mutt. We took down those two lackeys, you should be satisfied. He gave Kabuto a dirty look.
Inferior quality. I demand something better.
Quit complaining, asshole. I settle for cup ramen all the time. You can live off a couple of flunkies.

"Orochimaru-sama sent us after Sasuke, not Naruto. His capture is not our responsibility." The glint in Kabuto's glasses became more sinister. "We don't need to waste our time here."
The girl was still trembling with rage and terror; the glare she gave Kabuto was nearly as venomous as the one she gave Naruto. "He killed my teammates-"
"You should have known better than to engage someone who was not your target, particularly not when you didn't know what he was capable of," Kabuto interrupted mildly. "We're leaving. Naruto-kun, if you don't want to be captured, you really ought to leave this part of the country. Come along, Matsuba-kun." He disappeared into the trees, heading east.
The girl spat at Naruto. "We're not finished, Uzumaki." She followed after Kabuto, leaving Naruto alone.
Kill her!
Hey, hey, calm down. You wanna mess with Kabuto? Naruto did, actually, and he knew Kyuubi did too, but he wasn't stupid. Just shut up and go back to sleep.
The fox growled at him, but receded from the forefront of his consciousness. Naruto snorted to himself. Sometimes the fox acted his part as a raging elemental spirit of fire; sometimes he acted like a petulant, narcoleptic child. Most of the time he was something in between the two, childish and bloodthirsty.
Naruto stared into the trees where Kabuto and his subordinate had disappeared. I hate that guy. A lot. He took a few deep breaths to calm himself further, then turned west, towards Wind Country. There was still a little daylight left, and he had a long way to go.
xxxxxxx
Elsewhere in the forests of Fire Country, Uchiha Sasuke was slowly bleeding to death against a tree. Even with the sharingan, he could barely make out his own hand in front of his face in the darkness; the moon wasn't up yet, and the trees cut off most of the light from the stars.
His shirt was wet, he was shivering hot and cold by turns, and his ears were ringing; he needed to stop to rest and tend to his wounds, but every moment he spent waiting was a moment Kabuto and the others spent closing in. He compromised by stuffing the tattered remains of one of his arm guards into the wound on his shoulder and tying it in place with the last of his leg wrappings. It wasn't going to stop the bleeding in the long run, but it would keep him from trailing blood for a little while.
Can't afford to take another soldier pill, not with my reserves so depleted...Got to keep moving. His hands were already covered in blood; he placed his palm down on the ground and whispered, "Kuchiyose no jutsu." His vision grayed out from the effort, and the seal on his neck burned, draining away even more chakra.
"Uchiha." A dry hiss sounded in his ear. Daija- one of the friendlier snakes. Most of the others wouldn't do him the courtesy of referring to him by name. "What would you have me do?"
"Locate the search teams and delay them as best you can, then find me and report." Despite his efforts, the snakes still refused to accept him as their master, even if they did respond to his summons.
"You are dying," the snake observed. "A hatchling could smell the blood on you. What shall I do if you are dead by the time I return?"
"Dispose of my body and all my possessions." It wouldn't come to that. It couldn't. The curse seal flared again, painfully, as he lost more of his reserves. "Go now."
The large snake slithered away without a sound, leaving Sasuke alone in the dark. He took in shallow breaths through his mouth, partly to take the strain off ribs that had to be cracked, if not worse, and partly to utilize the only reliable sense he had left.
He could taste the remains of Daija's presence on the air, and the sharp tang of his own blood was nearly overwhelming. The breeze brought the acrid taste of unfamiliar chakra; his trackers weren't far away, now. I was too careless when I escaped. Shouldn't have let myself get injured. He had to keep moving.
"Fujimi no jutsu." The curse flared again, weakly, lending him the strength to complete the jutsu. The pain in his shoulder and ribs faded away, though the curse still burned. The technique was a double-edged sword; he was no longer in pain, but he wouldn't be able to tell if his wounds worsened. It was a medical jutsu he'd stolen from Kabuto, but it wasn't a healing jutsu.
It was better than nothing; he took a deeper breath, testing the air for a safe path through the trees, and started moving again. He stepped carefully, knowing there wasn't much he could do to keep from leaving a trail in his current state. He could only hope that Daija managed to throw off his scent long enough for him to find a place to lie low until dawn.
He stopped when the Fujimi began to wear off; his breathing had grown distressingly wet, and there was only so much the pain-killing technique could do when he had a punctured lung. He was lucky the trees in this part of the forest were huge; he could take shelter in the roots, underground.
The forest soil was soft and cool beneath the overhang of two enormous roots; Sasuke buried himself in the loam as best he could and placed a weak genjutsu over his hiding place. Instead of a dull burn in the curse seal, there was a sharp pain- if he tried using any more of his chakra, he would die. He surrendered to unconsciousness gratefully, too tired to care if he was caught.
The forest had grown somewhat lighter when he finally woke up. Daija was coiled across his hidey-hole; the snake flicked its tongue in greeting when Sasuke opened his eyes.
"Well?" He managed a hoarse whisper; his skin felt slightly fevered, and parts of him were numb in ways that probably indicated something very bad. It was difficult to concentrate, difficult to breathe.
"The secondary teams are chasing each other. The medic and his team have been sufficiently distracted. Two of their members are dead." Daija's head wove back and forth, but its gaze was steady.
"How?" Unwillingly, Sasuke's eyes followed the snake's movements, his own gaze caught in the serpent's. He knew, somewhere at the edge of his mind, that he was being manipulated by his own servant. Unfortunately, he was having too much trouble determining whether or not his arm had fallen off to care.
"Uzumaki."
His eyes widened, causing his chakra to flare painfully in shock. "Naruto? That makes no sense, why-"
The snake flicked its tongue at him, still weaving back and forth, and cut him off. "It is irrelevant. You are still dying. My contract lasts only until dawn; you must sleep or you will die."
"But what was Na-"
"Sleep." Daija's weaving had taken on a hypnotic quality. In his weakened state, Sasuke couldn't resist the snake's command.
His eyes rolled up in his head, Naruto's name a sigh on his lips. Daija flicked its tongue over his eyelids and lips affectionately and nudged a few chakra pathways to facilitate healing. Satisfied that its charge would survive, it settled down to wait until dawn.
---------------------------------------------------------
fujimi- invincibility/insensibility to pain
I despise the more common fanon interpretations of Iruka, which is why my version of him is a little...out there. I have reasons, I promise. And, in case anyone was wondering, there will not be any Kakairu in this story. Sorry, it just ain't happenin'. I love the pairing, but it won't be here.
Matsuba is a girl and Kabuto uses the -kun suffix when speaking to her, which is acceptable, I think; Kakashi uses -kun when talking to Sakura, and the relationship is similar. Sort of.
Fun facts about snakes: that tongue-flicker thing they do is to taste pheromones and other scents in the air; they've got crappy eyesight (which is appropriate, really), so they rely on their senses of smell and taste to get a good idea of their surroundings. They also don't have ears or eyelids, so they don't blink and they "hear" by picking up vibrations in the ground through their skulls. Daija is referred to as "it" because Sasuke doesn't know its gender and it's generally considered a little impolite to ask.
Comments and reviews are like delicious candy to me; if anything wasn't clear or if my characterizations are giving off wtf vibes, or if I missed any typos, I do want to hear about it so I can improve things. Or if there's anything you liked- any line or moment that stood out as particularly amusing or appropriate- I like to hear about those, too. So, feed me, dear readers. I hunger!
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Blindsided