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Illusion and Dream
By : djserani
Category: Naruto > Yaoi - Male/Male
Views: 1300 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto! I make no money off of this!
Chapter List
- 28
- 29
- 30
A/N: Just a reminder that this is NOT the last chapter. The end of this feels rather end-ish, but there ARE two more chapters and an epilogue, so if you're reading this as it's being posted, hang in there! There's just a bit more! And thanks for reading!

The first thing he registered was that his ass was cold. The front of him wasn't, but he figured that was because he was curled up against a warm body. He snuggled in a little more, the arm around him tightening. Then his hand moved up along the chest under it and he turned his head to drop a light kiss on the warm skin. A thought nagged at him that something was wrong with the chest he was laying on, but he couldn't seem to figure out what it was and his sleep addled brain simply didn't care enough. He reached back, dug up a blanket and pulled it over them before trying to go back to sleep.
"They'll stay there until we wake them, you know." A deep voice that sounded an awful lot like Raidou's said, but that didn't make sense because it didn't come from under him.
"Yeah, but do you want to be the one to wake them up?" Izumo's brows dropped into a scowl. That was... Tetsu's voice? He shook it off, thinking he must be dreaming.
"Hell, no." That was Raidou's voice.
Wait. If that was Raidou's voice, and it didn't come from under him... then who was under him? Izumo opened his eyes slowly and stared at the... very smooth, defined chest in front of his face. There were no scars... well, not the ones he was expecting, anyway. And... that wasn't Tetsu's chest, either.
His brain engaged more and he stopped moving, almost stopped breathing. If it wasn't Raidou and it wasn't Tetsu... his eyes made a slow path up along the expanse of skin, up over a neck covered in bruises, past the mouth and tongue that darted out to wet very sexy, kissable lips, and on up to a pair of hazel eyes that were watching him. Genma. He was laying on Genma.
How the hell did he end up laying on Genma?
He closed his eyes a moment and his mind filled in the night before with perfect clarity. He'd fallen asleep with Genma curled around him. After... As the thoughts of last night finished filling in the sleepy holes, his asshole twitched, he registered his hard cock against Genma's thigh and the taller man's own hard length jumped against his stomach. Okay. They'd had sex the night before. Oh boy had they had sex!
Images of the night before flashed through him, making his dick even more uncomfortable as the memories of just how good the man under him had felt, of Tetsu's mouth on him, of the four of them together. He nearly groaned out loud at the memory of Raidou's face when he came, the sound of Genma calling his name.
Genma cleared his throat at that moment and he opened his eyes again. He looked up to see the hazel eyes still focused on him. Where were Tetsu and Raidou? Then again, he wasn't sure if he wanted to know where they were, much less see them yet. "Morning," Genma murmured to him.
He ignored the snicker he heard from somewhere behind him. "Morning," he almost whispered in reply. Genma lifted his hand, tilted Izumo's head up, then leaned down to drop a light kiss on the smaller man's lips.
"Sleep well?" Genma asked, also ignoring the sounds they heard from the other two people in the room.
Izumo nodded and decided for a bit of payback for the laughter at their expense. He smiled, caught the twinkle in Gen's eye that meant it was understood what he was about to do and said, "Better than I've had in a long time. Must be the person I slept next to."
The snickers died on a strangled sound. Genma dropped one eyelid in a quick wink and Izumo fought the urge to laugh. Instead, he scooted up a little along the taller man's body, then leaned in and captured those incredibly sexy lips in another kiss, this one very long, and very thorough. He felt Genma's hand slide down his back to rest on his ass and pull him in against the long, lean body, their arousals brushing. A low moan escaped as the kiss deepened and both of them ignored the deliberate light cough.
Instead, Izumo moved more firmly onto Genma, their bodies rocking together as the kiss deepened even further. There was a more pronounced cough, a cleared throat and then finally, Izumo heard a voice in his ear. "That's my partner you're about to fuck."
Genma and Izumo broke apart, smirks on their faces. Zumo looked over his shoulder at his best friend. "And? You left him for me to sleep next to. Your fault."
The slanted eyes blinked at him in shock for a moment, and it took all Izumo had to keep a straight face. It was Genma who spoke next. "Go away, we're enjoying ourselves here. Entertain yourselves," he chuckled quietly and turned back to Izumo, pulling the smaller man back down and capturing those incredible lips again.
"You know, he joked last night that Zumo might not want to go back to me, but I thought he was joking..." Raidou said, staring at the other two. "Think we'd get their attention if we started doing something?"
Kotetsu turned his attention back to Raidou - the man he'd awakened next to, and had practically been laying on. They'd looked at each other and sat up, somewhat awkwardly - initially. Mostly because Kotetsu had noticed how hard he'd been, having been dreaming about the night before when he woke up.
But Raidou's appeal hadn't disappeared with the last of the stars. If anything, Rai was even more attractive to the younger man now that he knew just what that big body felt like, what those hands and lips could do. And the initial awkwardness had faded as the memories of the night before surfaced. Instead of nervousness, heat flared and they found themselves kissing before they'd even given it any real thought.
Then Izumo had shifted, bringing them back to themselves. Yes, they'd had sex the night before, yes, Izumo had agreed to him fucking his best friend's partner. But there was nothing saying that spilled over into the next day. That didn't necessarily mean it was okay anytime, even with who it was.
Besides that, he still had Gen to think about. Genma had been fine with last night, but there was nothing saying that it'd be okay to just fuck other people whenever they felt like it. They'd agreed to be exclusive with each other and one night with their best friends didn't suddenly cancel that.
So they'd pulled back from each other and turned their attention to the other two. And now their lovers were involved with each other. Tetsu moved closer to Raidou again, giving in to the need he felt for his friend, the want of the big man. He sent one more glance at Genma and Izumo - the two men he was still in love with, shook his head and started kissing the bigger man who responded with his own heat.
"They're trying to get our attention by kissing," Genma whispered into Izumo's ear before nipping on the lobe.
Izumo couldn't fight the moan completely, but it covered the snicker he also couldn't quite hold back. "Do we let it work?" He whispered back.
"Mmmm," Genma moaned to make it a little worse then kissed Izumo hurriedly to stifle the laugh that wanted to come out when Raidou looked up at it. Both sets of eyes slid closed, however, as the kiss moved from pretend to real and Izumo unconsciously rocked into the taller man again. "Mmm, God, I don't know..." Genma managed when they broke apart. "I have to admit to wanting you again."
Izumo let a quiet groan out at that, then succeeded in actually concentrating on the conversation. "How far do you think they'll go?" He forced himself to whisper.
Hazel eyes darted over to the other two men, then back. "Well," he started, then paused to nibble at one of the few small patches of un-bruised skin on Izumo's neck, earning another quiet moan. "Tetsu's already straddling Rai's lap. I give it a few more minutes before they're actually fucking."
Izumo snorted, burying his face in Gen's neck to hide it. "And they gave us shit?"
Genma chuckled quietly, too. "I say we see if they go the whole way with it."
Izumo glanced over and sure enough, Kotetsu was, in fact, straddling the bigger man. One of Raidou's arms was wrapped around the smaller man, fingers already working their way toward Kotetsu's entrance. Izumo turned back to Genma. "I say we do, too. In the mean time..." he let the thought trail off and Genma grinned in response. Their lips met again, their tongues slid along the other's and they lost themselves once more.
They did, in fact, go pretty damned far. But much like the night before, they moved closer together and hands and mouths, touches and kisses became confused until it was hard to figure out what belonged to who.
Until, that is, Kotetsu found himself straddling his best friend. He stared down into the brown eyes that were only a few centimeters from his own, their lips barely more than a breath apart. Their breathing was ragged, both bodies hard, nearly desperately aroused, and both wanting the other so very, very much. Zumo's cock was right there, Tetsu was poised over it, his ass flexing at the idea of his best friend filling him.
But the agreement to fuck each other's partners was not this. Even the idea of playing around like last night and the subsequent joking and fun this morning wasn't the same as making love to his best friend.
Because he knew that's what would happen. Maybe there was a bit of that in all of their experiences together - Genma, Raidou and, of course, Izumo. Maybe they all had feelings for each other. But whether they did or not - and that was an even bigger mess than just the desire to fuck each other -- whether they did or not wasn't the issue. They hadn't agreed to it.
He sat up a bit, glancing over to see that Raidou was laying on Genma, Gen's legs were wrapped around the bigger man's waist, their own lips had only the slightest distance separating them. They, too, had stopped just shy of doing anything. Raidou was right there, ready to fill Genma, their eyes glued to each other, bodies also straining, breathing harsh. The two of them looked over and Izumo and Kotetsu met their gazes - that of their partners.
And the truth slammed into all of them at the same time.
Genma still loved Raidou. Kotetsu hadn't stopped loving Izumo. And both Izumo and Raidou had recognized that their feelings hadn't changed, either. They still loved their best friends. They'd all known this, recognized it in themselves, but looking, now, at the facial expressions, at the way they touched, it was impossible to ignore anymore.
Kotetsu looked at Genma, then back at Izumo, who'd torn his eyes away from his partner and shifted them back to the slanted ones. If he could believe what Zumo said last night, his best friend loved him. Rai loved Genma, he'd seen it on the bigger man's face just now and if he thought about it, he knew he'd seen it before... maybe... they could still have the ones they really wanted.
He glanced again at Genma and felt a sharp stab at being without the other man. He loved Genma, really loved being with the other man. Loved the way that they were together, what they had with each other. But if he looked back at Izumo, he felt the same jab at not having his best friend, either.
They all held there in a sort of suspended moment, no one moving or speaking.
Genma swallowed around his suddenly dry throat as his eyes met the slanted ones. He could see the storm of emotion moving through the other man. Knew that his lover, his partner was just as conflicted as he was.
He looked back up at Raidou. His best friend, the man he'd been in love with for years. It was still there, all of it. His feelings for the bigger man had never gone away, hadn't changed even with his time with Tetsu.
The thought of his current partner brought an ache. He swallowed again, his eyes darting to Kotetsu who was still looking at Izumo. Tetsu was in love with Zumo and he could finally have what he wanted. Hazel eyes went back to those of his best friend.
They were intense, focused on him and he couldn't place the look. He couldn't quite figure out what was going on behind those dark eyes. He knew what he felt physically, what Raidou's body was telling him - that the bigger man wanted him, but...
Raidou took in the expressions crossing Genma's face - the apprehension, the confusion and the fear then glanced again at Kotetsu and Izumo who had gone back to staring at each other. He'd suspected that something was wrong with his partner and he'd thought maybe that something had spiky black hair and slanted eyes.
He wanted to be angry at it, but he couldn't seem to find that anger. There was a mess of other emotions surrounding it, but anger seemed conspicuously absent. And he knew why. Knew it was because, he, too, had his own doubts, had pushed his own feelings away, replacing those he had for someone with long brown hair and hazel eyes with the chuunin. It didn't lessen what he felt for Izumo at all, no. When he looked over and the brown eyes met his, he knew that it was all still there. And the spike that went through him at the thought of giving up Izumo only strengthened that realization.
But if he looked back down at his best friend - he knew that what he'd suspected earlier was true. Gen loved him, he could see it in the hazel eyes that were currently horribly confused and focused on him.
Someone had to do something. Something had to give. Yes, they'd fucked and maybe Aoba was right, to a point. They'd wanted each other, but it wasn't the fucking that was the root of it.
It was the emotions. Emotions that they'd all spent so much time fighting and hiding and now had no idea how to deal with. Because they did want each other - but not just to fuck.
But now what? He threw one more glance at Izumo, hoped to hell he was doing the right thing, put apology into the look that he thought Izumo understood and accepted and then turned back to Genma. Shoving his fears aside, Raidou captured Genma's lips and filled the man in a single move.
Kotetsu and Izumo only barely registered the movement. They caught enough, knew what it meant. Tetsu focused on his best friend. "Did you mean it?" The spiky-haired nin asked.
Izumo couldn't pretend he didn't know what his friend was asking. He nodded, swallowing around his suddenly dry throat, scared to death. He'd just lost his lover. He knew it, knew that Genma and Raidou had finally admitted what they'd been hiding for a long time, what Izumo had seen and hoped he'd been wrong about. He closed his eyes, fighting the fear, the sadness and the need to just curl in on himself.
"Say it. Tell me again, Zumo, please." Kotetsu's voice floated through the riot of emotions going through him. And he heard a tangle of feelings in his best friend's voice that cause him to open his eyes.
He forced his fears back, concentrating again on the slanted eyes above him. "I love you, Tetsu," he finally whispered, but the fears didn't stay away and his eyes slid closed again, unable to see the answering look, the one he was sure that said that love was one-sided. Why? Why had Tetsu made him say it again? What did that prove?
Panic closed his throat and he wanted away, needed to get out of there, and go somewhere, anywhere. He needed to try to just breathe, needed to fight the tears that wanted to leak through, had to find a way to deal with the near physical pain that was slowly blooming. He pushed on Kotetsu and in surprise, his friend moved.
Izumo stood, refusing to look at anyone and nearly ran into the bathroom, closing the door harder than he meant to. He put his back to it and slid down slowly until he was sitting on the floor. He stared into nothing, fighting desperately for control of himself and his emotions.
The thing he kept circling around to was Kotetsu. How could he have let himself fall in love with his best friend again? Or, better yet, how could he have let those feelings back out. He'd put them away, buried them. Because he'd known if he let them out, if he told his best friend how he felt, they'd just be thrown back in his face. Tetsu simply couldn't love him.
Why not? He loved Genma. Why couldn't he love you? Did you give him a chance to tell you he didn't? Did you give him a chance reply at all?
Izumo couldn't answer those. Because he didn't like what the answers would be.
His head fell back against the wooden door, his eyes closed and, despite his best efforts, the tears leaked out anyway.

Kotetsu stared at his friend's retreating back, trying desperately to figure out what he'd said wrong. He'd just needed to hear it, one more time before he returned it. And before he'd been able to utter a single sound, Izumo had taken off.
He couldn't look over at the others, couldn't see them together, but he couldn't stay there, either. Izumo may have said he loved him, but he didn't want to. Kotetsu wasn't a complete fool, he was sure that's what he saw on his best friend's face. So he needed to go, but he didn't know where he could go. He didn't want to go back to... Gen's apartment.
And the thought of his... former lover brought an ache that nearly stopped his breath. He closed his eyes, fought it hard. What was he supposed to do?
"Go after him, Tetsu," Genma's voice sounded in his ear. He looked up in surprise to see the taller man kneeling next to him.
Tetsu shook his head. "He doesn't want me, Gen," he whispered. His eyes darted to Raidou, who was sitting next to Gen, one hand on the assassin's back. There was pain in both sets of eyes, confusion and a number of other things he couldn't begin to name.
Genma swallowed and fought hard against the urge to touch the other man. He wanted to brush at the black hair, find some way to soothe the storm of emotions in the shorter man's eyes, but it wasn't his right to, anymore, despite the feelings he still had for the other man. Instead he forced a smile onto his face and opened his mouth to speak, but it was Raidou that beat him to it.
"Yes, he does." He paused a moment to clear his throat and Kotetsu saw him fight with something in himself before he continued. "He thinks you can't love him. I... know because I... understand the feeling. Talk to him."
Kotetsu stared at the scarred man for a moment before turning back to Genma. His throat thickened as his eyes met the hazel ones, but his former lover gave him a nod of encouragement. He reached out to touch, but dropped his hand before it could finish the trip. He swallowed around the ache again and sat back. After a deep breath, he got to his feet, heading down the short hall.
He stood in front of the bathroom door for a full minute, screwing up his courage. He knocked lightly, but there was no answer. He closed his eyes, resting his face against the smooth wood and dug deep, looking for the part of him that he used when he went after something he wanted. His mind supplied the images of Izumo's face when they made love, of the smile when his friend had agreed to "marry" him, at the closed eyes and stunned expression after that first kiss in the cart.
He knocked again, louder this time. "Just a minute, please," Izumo's quiet voice answered.
"Zumo, it's me. Let me in... or... come out." Kotetsu waited, hoping against hope that his friend would just stay still for a minute and listen.
He waited and waited, heard the water in the sink turn on and off and still it didn't open. He was about to call out again or simply break the door down when he heard the lock turn and saw the knob move. The wood pulled back slowly and there was his best friend.
God, he loved this man. His gaze moved over the face and body, taking in those huge brown eyes, the way his hair never would stay out of his face, that incredible body, the smile that, when it showed was enough to push away so much -- sadness, fear, pain. Then there was the humor, the intelligence, the care he had for everyone.
He didn't give his friend a chance to get away. Before the door opened all the way, he slipped in, closed it behind himself and pulled the other man into his arms, wrapping them tight when Izumo would pull away. "I love you, too."
The visible brown eye widened and he stared at Kotetsu. "T-Tetsu?"
"I love you. I've loved you for a...really long time. Maybe even since that first kiss on the training grounds all those years ago." He shook his head. "I had no idea what it was, no idea what to do with it. And then... I thought you didn't. That you couldn't... wouldn't... want me."
"Not want you? Tetsu... I... you... we..." he stammered, staring at his friend, his brain completely deserting him.
"You were in... love..." he cursed himself for bringing the others up.
He saw Izumo's face pale a little bit and the throat work as his friend swallowed. "Because I thought you couldn't love me. I tried to forget about you - like that." His eyes closed again and he swallowed hard. "It didn't work." It was almost a whisper, but in the quiet room, the words were clear.
"God, I'm so glad." He closed his own eyes and captured his friend's lips then. He felt Izumo's hands slide up his back, one of them tangling in the black hair. They got lost in each other, in the feel of hands and lips, of their bodies up against the other's.
When they pulled back for air a few minutes later, Izumo stared into the slanted eyes. "Now what?"
Kotetsu's smile spread. "Now you let me take you to bed and show you just how I love you."
Izumo smiled at that, but it faded quickly, thoughts of the other two people in the apartment intruding. "But..."
Kotetsu's smile faded, too. "They're together now. They love each other, too. Gen's been in love with Rai for a long time."
"Then why...?" Izumo asked, brows knitting in confusion.
Kotetsu shrugged a shoulder. "We were convinced you were in love and not changing that fact. We were just going to hang out, be fuck buddies."
"You didn't stay fuck buddies," Izumo said and Kotetsu shook his head.
"No. No, we didn't."
"But.. then...d-do..." he started, then trailed off, not wanting to really know. Not wanting to have to give his own answer if the question was returned.
Kotetsu considered him a long moment. "We'll talk about that later. Let's at least get out of the bathroom."
Izumo nodded and stepped back. But when they got out to the living room, the other two were gone, their clothes missing and the blanket and pillows picked up off of the floor. Izumo and Kotetsu stared at each other a moment, both a little hurt by the lack of a good-bye, but then Kotetsu spotted the piece of paper on the small kitchen table.

I&K,
We'll be back later this afternoon. There are things we all need to talk about, but we thought you might appreciate some time alone.
See you later,

G&R

They stared at the paper a moment, then back at each other. "Well, they're right. I would like some time alone with you," Kotetsu said, taking Izumo's hand.
Izumo looked his friend over, trying to fight the hurt from Raidou being gone. He took a deep breath, forced back the stab at the thought of his... former lover and instead turned his attention to his best friend. Tetsu loved him. He loved Tetsu. He wasn't alone, he had someone - the one he'd wanted for so long.
He tightened his hand around Kotetsu's and smiled. It was a little shaky, but it was there. Together, they headed into the bedroom. Time alone, indeed.
- 28
- 29
- 30
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Illusion and Dream	By : djserani Category: Naruto > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 1300 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto! I make no money off of this!

Illusion and Dream