Adult-FanFiction.org : Naruto

Not Just Another Fake Boyfriend Story	By : SoapMaster Category: Naruto > Yaoi - Male/Male > Naruto/Sasuke Views: 1761 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of the characters mentioned in the story. I do not make any money off of this story.

Chapter List
- 1
- 2
- 3
Chapter Two: Nothing More
The next morning didn't really start off all that pleasant, although it might just be the fact that Sasuke wasn't not a morning person. Very few mornings actually start off pleasantly. He nearly broke his alarm clock in anger when it woke him from his slumber, and he nearly rolled back over to go to sleep. The only thing that stopped him was the fact that he had to go into school today. Today was the day that he came out of the closet and got rid of the fan girls once and for all. Hopefully.
He had IM'd with Naruto last night, and he'd practically agreed that he'd follow along with this. Sasuke told him where they were going to meet before school, and he'd already started mentally preparing to come out of the closet to Neji, Hinata and Tenten, not to mention Kakashi and the rest of school.
Itachi, of course, dampened his mood a bit. At breakfast this morning, he asked when Sasuke's boy toy would be dropping by the mansion again, and then he started trying to singsong 'Sasuke and Naruto, sitting in a tree, F-U-C-K-I-N-G', but Sasuke just ignored him. Eventually, he'd give up on it. It was then that Sasuke decided to leave for school, and due to a lack of the usual traffic, it took him half the time to get to the school that it usually took.
He slung his bag over his shoulder and made his way towards the building to pick up Naruto. He passed a few girls who tried to talk to him and flirt with him, but he just shut them down. After all, he had to pick up Naruto. He would never get used to this. He walked to the left side of the building while everyone was filing into the school, his bad mood starting to give way to a good mood. If everything went right, then he'd be free of the fan girls forever after this! That thought in and of itself was almost enough to make him smile.
He stood where he was supposed to meet Naruto and saw that no one was there. Was he even showing up? They did agree on 7:30 and it was already 7:34. Did Naruto decide last minute to stand Sasuke up and call off their deal? That would be completely unacceptable. There was no way in hell that Sasuke would let such an utter moron off the hook like that. In fact, just to prove a point that no one screws with an Uchiha, he might just have to get him back for this. As Sasuke mentally continued the rant of things he'd do to get even, he didn't notice someone approach from behind me.
"Hello?" came the voice, shaking Sasuke from the thoughts he had. "Sasuke?" Said boy turned around, expecting to see the blond hair that belonged to his now fake boyfriend, surprised when his eyes fell upon the wrong blond. He recognized her from a few of his classes. She wasn't one of the fangirls, but she used to have a huge crush on Sasuke in middle school. In fact, back then, she and Sakura were the two most prominent fan girls, always arguing over who got to sit next to Sasuke and whatnot.
"What do you want?" Sasuke asked shortly, not wanting to get involved in anything else. He already had to plot Naruto's death; he didn't need a former fangirl distracting me.
"I'm here to be your girlfriend," she grumbled, surprising the Uchiha. He looked up with a questioning glance at her. What the hell was she talking about? His look must have conveyed his question, as she answered it quickly. "Naruto told me you needed someone to pretend to be your girlfriend for a little bit to get your fangirls off your back, and he said he'd pay me $50 to do it."
That fucking idiot. Didn't he understand that Sasuke needed the fake girlfriend to be A BOY? That was the only reason he asked him in the first place. But that concept must have gone over his head. If Sasuke wanted to have a fake girlfriend, he could have asked Sakura.
"No," Sasuke said. "I don't need a fake girlfriend. All that would do is rile the fangirls up, and it would probably put you into an early grave." She snorted at this, which kind of pissed Sasuke off. Who the hell did she think she was anyway?
"You think I'm scared of them?" the blonde girl – Sasuke didn't remember her name – asked, her face sporting an entertained look. "Please, I could chew them up and spit them out. There's no need for Naruto to pretend to be your boyfriend when I can just do it for him and spare him his reputation. You see – everyone's happy. I get my money, he gets his rep, and you get rid of those harpies."
"Why do you care about Naruto's reputation?" Sasuke asked, impatience getting the best of him. It's not like what she said didn't make sense, but the fact that she was a fangirl of Sasuke's at one point didn't really make him excited about this prospect.
"He is my brother," the girl said with a shrug. That's odd – Sasuke didn't know Naruto had a sister in their grade. They didn't look that much like each other at all. Even the blonde hair was much more yellow on Naruto's head, while on hers, it seemed more like a pale silver. He was also much tanner than she was, and his face looked entirely different. Sasuke never would have guessed. "Besides, I owe him for something."
"I don't have the patience for this," Sasuke said as he sighed. "I don't remember your name, but I do remember that you stalked me for, like, four years. I don't exactly trust you to keep your hands off." Was he being an asshole? Yes. Did he care? No.
"Well, first off, the name's Ino," the girl, Ino, said. "Second off, I really don't care if you trust me. It's not like I want to do this, but $50 will get me the new Rihanna album, so I'm all for it." 'Really?' thought Sasuke. 'Did she just imply that a Rihanna CD is more important than me? I didn't know whether to be angry or relieved.' He just settled for indifferent.
"Well then, I guess I won't be needing your services anymore," Sasuke said with a shrug as he started to walk around towards the front of the school. "I didn't ask for a fake girlfriend for a reason." He didn't stay back long enough to hear or see her reaction, instead choosing to return to his previous thoughts of how to kill Naruto. It had to be slow and painful, definitely.
As he walked into his English class a few minutes later, he sent a glare towards the sunshine blond who was sitting in the first row, smiling and laughing with his friends. There were a bunch of people in that group – a kid named Kiba who was a meathead with a brain that rivaled the size of a dog's, a kid named Choji who could eclipse the sun if he was in orbit, a kid named Sai who had the social skills of a dead turkey, and a kid named Lee who had more energy in his pinky than Sasuke could ever muster up, even if he drank Red Bull for a week straight. There was also Kiba, who was the only person who could make Naruto seem intelligent. The blond was too busy with his friends, however, to notice the glare Sasuke sent him as he went to sit with Sakura, Hinata, Gaara, Neji and Tenten. As Sasuke sat down, the bell rang, and the teacher, Kurenai Yuhi, came into the room.
"Okay class," she said. "Sit down and take out last night's homework." Business as usual. She went around the room, collecting the homework one person at a time. Like always, Naruto grinned, scratching his cheek, when Kurenai-sensei came by and he didn't have homework done. Hn, what a moron.
After homework was collected, she had the students get into groups of two to discuss the book they were currently reading, Tales of a Gutsy Ninja. The book was actually written by Jiraya, from the time in his life when he was less of a pervert and before he'd decided to teach. It actually wasn't a bad book, except for the fact that it had a main character named…you guessed it…Naruto.
Normally, Sasuke would pair up with Gaara, Neji with Tenten, and Sakura with Hinata. Everyone else in the class would pair up in their own circle of friends as well, the groups never changing at all. But today, Sasuke decided he had to confront Naruto. When everyone got up to get partners, he headed straight towards the blond, who was standing next to Kiba.
"Naruto, you're my partner," Sasuke said with an air of finality in his voice. He wasn't in the mood for arguing, especially with Naruto.
"Get lost, Uchiha," Kiba said with a scowl. "Naruto and I are already partners." Sasuke glared at the brunet before grabbing Naruto's arm and pulling him with back to Sasuke's seat. At first the blond struggled, but Sasuke wouldn't let him escape. Naruto turned back apologetically at Kiba, who strode off. In the end, he paired up with Gaara, who Sasuke had left without a partner of his own.
"So, what did you think about Naruto defeating Zabuza?" Naruto asked, trying to talk about the book and get down to business. Sasuke scowled; did he really think he did that just to talk about the fucking book?
"Personally, I think Naruto is a stupid little punk who lies to people," Sasuke said, sending him a pointed look that either he ignored or didn't understand the importance of.
"What?" he exclaimed "Naruto never lies! He's a strong, brave ninja who doesn't let anything get in his way of becoming Hokage!" Was he serious here? How long was he going to go on with this? Choosing not to play his game, Sasuke intensified his glare before responding.
"I'm talking about the other Naruto," he said, sending Naruto a pointed look. Suddenly, the blonde's face changed to an expression of acceptance. It's like he knew they were going to have to talk about his little stunt with Ino eventually, but he was hoping to delay it. But it seemed he finally resigned himself to this conversation.
"Oh," he said. "This is about Ino, isn't it?" he guessed.
"No shit, Sherlock," Sasuke said sarcastically. "If you didn't want to do this, you could have just told me no instead of lying."
"I didn't lie," Naruto said, emphasizing the last word. "I was resigned to having to do it, but then I talked with Ino, and we came up with a better plan that made everyone happy. I did you a favor. So when are you two going public?" he asked with a smirk.
"We're not," Sasuke said, a smirk forming on is face. "I'm going to get my fake boyfriend and show you not to screw with me in one shot." The plan had already begun to form in his mind. If there was no way that Naruto would willingly agree to pretend to be Sasuke's boyfriend because of his reputation, then the solution would be to ruin Naruto's reputation to the point where going out with Sasuke would improve it. But how could he achieve that? He'd need to make the school's student body want the two of them to date in order to do that, and he was pretty sure that wouldn't happen.
"What do you mean?" Naruto asked, his voice low as he narrowed his eyes. At least Sasuke's vague threat seemed to catch his attention. Maybe he wasn't as stupid as Sasuke thought he was. The big question was how Sasuke would get the school to want them together.
Well, people love a good romance. If Sasuke could paint a picture that he and Naruto were some epic romance, he could probably get people on his side. After all, the fan girls were still girls, and girls loved sappy romances. And then the idea came to the Uchiha.
"You'll see soon enough," he said with a smirk. Naruto looked like he was going to question Sasuke further, but before he had the opportunity, Kurenai had them regroup as a class to discuss the novel, leaving the blond wondering about Sasuke's form of revenge.
After class ended, Sasuke was hounded in the halls by Sakura, who wanted to know why he chose to partner with Naruto during class. He had a small mental battle with himself before continuing. If he was to go through with this plan, he'd have to lie to Sakura and Gaara, which he didn't want to do. But if he was to not go through with the plan, he'd have to find another solution to the fangirls and find another way to punish Naruto. So, in the end, Sasuke's needs outweighed the guilt of lying.
"He kissed me last night," Sasuke lied, noting the shocked look on Sakura's face. Even Gaara, who had been walking next to her, couldn't contain his shock. "When we went to my house to work on the project, we just sort of…connected." She beamed in happiness for me, which made Sasuke feel a little guilty for lying, while Gaara was silent. The squeal Sakura let out was virtually inhuman, and Sasuke was pretty certain that only certain species of dolphins were able to fully hear it.
"When are you going to tell everyone that you two are going out?" Sakura asked, excitement playing on her features. "This is so exciting. I thought he liked you…he was always looking at our table during lunch." Sasuke didn't need to tell her that those longing looks were directed at her, not him. "There are just some things a girl can sense."
Sasuke knew that he would end up having to tell Neji about this next period, Phsyics, since they were lab partners. He'd probably wondered why Sasuke partnered with Naruto as well, and he'd learn about this all at lunch anyway. It was best to do this now and get it over with.
Sasuke shuffled into his seat next to Neji and took out his physics notebook. As Genma entered, Neji turned to Sasuke with a look of confusion on his face. Tenten sat down with Hinata at the lab table in front of the pair, and they both turned with questioning looks to hear Sasuke's answer to the question they all knew Neji was about to ask. Well, this was it. It was the moment of truth. After this, there was no turning back.
"So what's up with you and Naruto?" he asked. Sasuke breathed in deeply. 'C'mon, you can do it, Sasuke. If he reacts badly, you can just say you were pretending to be gay to get the fangirls off your backs.'
"Naruto and I are together," he said finally. "I'm gay."
Now, there are a few reactions you expect when you come out of the closet to someone. Anger, disgust, confusion, a mixture. Heck, it might just be pure happiness. But there were only so many responses and reactions that Sasuke was expecting, and what actually happened was not any of them.
"It's about time," Tenten muttered from the seat in front of me. She sounded annoyed.
"Yeah, well…wait, wait?" Sasuke asked. What did she mean, 'it's about time'? Did she…did she know? Sensing Sasuke's confusion, Neji decided to answer to spare Tenten.
"Tenten and I had a bet on when you'd finally come out," Neji explained, sounding slightly abashed. "She said it would be before the end of last school year, but I said it would be at least after the beginning of senior year." As if Sasuke's confession didn't matter at all, he turned to his girlfriend and opened his hand so his palm faced the ceiling. "Pay up."
Muttering, Tenten pulled out two twenties and put them in Neji's hand, the Hyuga's hand closing around the money. Why he needed more money was beyond Sasuke, since his family was even richer than the Uchihas!
Wait a second…
"You knew?" Sasuke asked Neji, shocked. Was it that obvious? Did he stare at guys or something? Sasuke doubted it. So what was it? Was he just so flamboyant that it was impossible to ignore?
"Duh," Tenten said. "Why else would you remain single so long? You have so many fangirls, that any straight guy would have at least fooled around with most of them, even if he didn't actually get a girlfriend out of it."
"If I had half as many fangirls as you, I would have a different bed warmer every night," Neji said simply, earning a smack from his girlfriend. "If I didn't have Tenten, of course," he added, just a little bit too late.
"Hinata was the first to pick up on it," Tenten said. Sasuke looked over to the blushing Hyuga, who didn't meet his eye. Dammit! Sasuke always prided himself on his cool mask of steely indifference. And now, he finds out people can see right through it? If he didn't have such a powerful cool mask of steely indifference, he'd have pouted right then.
After the enlightening conversation, physics class went by rather quickly, and before he knew it, it was time for lunch, which meant it was time for Sasuke to put his master plan into full effect. By the end of the day, Naruto would be humiliated (and possibly beaten up by a few of Sasuke's more powerful fangirls), and Ssauke would be free. Free at last, free at last! Thank God Almighty, he'll be free at last!
After he got his turkey and cheese sandwich from the cafeteria lady, Sasuke got his napkins and smirked before walking to the area where all the tables were. He sent one glance towards his usual table and then made the decision to stride over to Naruto's table instead. After all, he needed to keep appearances up, didn't he?
"What are you doing here?" Naruto asked as Sasuke dropped his tray right next to him and sat down. He smirked inwardly, not wanting to actually show the wrong emotion and mess this plan up. For this plan to work, Sasuke would have to channel his inner-actor to get this to work. He'd have to deliver an Oscar-worthy performance.
"What?" Sasuke asked innocently, raising an eyebrow. "I'm not allowed to sit next to my boyfriend?" Sasuke couldn't tell whether the red flush on Naruto's face was from embarrassment, or anger, or both, but Sasuke knew that he liked it.
"What are you talking about?" Kiba asked, his mouth half full with his food. Sasuke knew the scene that was about the unfold would be entertaining, so he decided to commit every word to memory. He wanted to be able to look back on this when he's sixty and recall how he destroyed Naruto.
"He didn't tell you?" Sasuke asked, earning a confused look from Sai and Lee. "Naruto and I are together." Before Naruto knew what was happening, Sasuke reached his hand out and covered the blonde's, conveying as much affection as possible. Naruto's eyes widened in shock, and Kiba looked confused. Glancing from Naruto to me, his eyes started to widen, beginning to believe me.
"He's lying," Naruto said, his voice finally starting to work for him again. He pulled his hand back like he was touching hot coals. He must have been too shell shocked to respond at first. Suddenly, Sasuke furrowed his brow, trying to convey confusion to the witnesses of this exchange, which now included Ino and Choji as well.
"W-What?" Sasuke asked, hoping that he wasn't being too out of character by stuttering. He had to sound sad and disappointed, or else it would be too obvious that he was fucking with him, but he couldn't overact, either. Sasuke saw out of the corner of his eye that Ino was starting to narrow her eyes. Since she knew about Sasuke's proposal to Naruto last night, Sasuke obviously wasn't fooling her. Oh well, he really only had to convince the student body. "So that kiss last night meant nothing?" Sasuke quickly replaced his look of sadness with a look of stony anger. That's what he'd do if this was real, right? He couldn't actually stay looking like a pathetically love-stricken girl.
"YOU KISSED SASUKE!" Kiba yelled all too loudly. Damn, it was really hard to not smirk at his plan going so well. Kiba's voice had now attracted the attention of the entire cafeteria, as everyone looked at the table Sasuke was now sitting at with interest. Naruto's face grew redder, this time definitely from embarrassment. This couldn't be going more perfectly if Sasuke was able to write their responses himself.
"No, I didn't," Naruto whispered harshly. He looked around and must have noticed that they were the center of attention for all the students, waiting for the drama to unfold. And Sasuke couldn't just disappoint them, could he? He was able to feel the intensity of glares directed at the blond from the fangirl table behind him. "Ino, will you help me out?"
Ino seemed to understand the situation much more quickly than Naruto had, because her eyes narrowed at Sasuke. If he wasn't an Uchiha, he might have flinched at it. Maybe.
"You're a real asshole, you know that?" she asked. 'Alright, Sasuke this is it. It's time to deliver the final blow to Naruto's sorry reputation and the hopes of those insane fangirls.' He pushed his seat away and picked his tray up.
"I may be an asshole," Sasuke said, projecting his voice so that the silent student body could hear every word he said perfectly. "But at least I don't kiss people and pretend it didn't happen." Sasuke felt the stares of hundreds of kids on him, and decided it was time to continue. He wanted to give the rest of the students enough time to absorb this, but not enough time to question it. "I can't believe I actually liked you. Well, even I can tell when I'm not wanted." Sasuke debated letting a single tear fall to accentuate his point, but he decided he'd already done enough to ruin Naruto.
As soon as he got into the hallway, though, he almost really did start to cry…from laughter. It went so much better than he'd anticipated. It turned his foul mood from this morning into a cheerful one. He felt like he could conquer the world! It was exhilarating to ruin someone. Now, Naruto could choose to either be hated as the insensitive asshole who broke Sasuke's heart, or he'd have to accept Sasuke's offer. And either way, the rest of the student body would think he was gay – it was so perfect!
It didn't take Naruto thirty seconds to storm out of the cafeteria after the Uchiha. Not that they didn't have an audience, Sasuke decided it was time to let is smirk show itself. Naruto glared at him and clenched his fists in anger.
"What the fuck was that, you bastard?" he exclaimed. "What are you trying to pull?"
"Well, as of now, you are the most hated kid in Konoha High," Sasuke said with a smirk. "You 'broke the heart' of the Golden Boy. Now, you'll be lucky to get through the rest of the day without getting beaten up by my fangirls. And now, since everyone thinks I'm not-so-secretly pining for you, they'll leave me alone. I just killed two birds with one stone. I bet you wished you'd met me this morning, don't you?" He was actually shaking with anger, but it didn't scare Sasuke. If anything, it made his smirk grow.
"You asshole," Naruto growled. "Just because I didn't want to go along with some scheme that had a slight chance of helping you at my expense doesn't give you the right to ruin my life!" Sasuke could feel a slight pang of guilt at that, knowing that if the shoe was on the other foot, he would hate himself. And then there was the whole thought that Sasuke humiliated Naruto just like Itachi liked to humiliate Sasuke, which sent shivers down Sasuke's spine.
"I think if you want to salvage your reputation, you should rethink my offer," Sasuke said, deciding to be generous. "Right now, everyone thinks you're an asshole who's confused about his sexuality. If you decide to go through with the plan that I'd already come up with, you can go from a bi-curious asshole to a gay sweetheart." His glare intensified at Sasuke's suggestion.
"I'm not gay," Naruto insisted. "And I certainly won't do you any favors," he spat.
"Well, it wouldn't really be a favor," Sasuke replied with a shrug. "I've done what I wanted to do. This is my offer to help you salvage what's left of your reputation." His glared didn't let up and Sasuke scoffed. "I'll give you to the end of the day to rethink my offer. Good luck salvaging your reputation and preventing those rabid fangirls from tearing your balls off." Sasuke turned to walk away, but Naruto got in front of him, blocking the way.
"You really are the biggest asshole on earth!" he shouted at Sasuke.
"And you're the biggest dumbass on earth," the raven retorted. Naruto glared at Sasuke for a little longer, probably hoping that the Uchiha would eventually crack and return to the cafeteria to undo the damage he caused. But after the little staring contest Naruto had initiated, he huffed and walked off in the other direction while Sasuke walked to history class.
Too bad for him that they had history next, because they were still partners for the history project. And as if his luck wasn't bad enough this morning, they had to work together all afternoon. Sasuke knew there were whispers about Naruto from some of the other groups, and Naruto barely spoke a word to him. That was fine, because he normally never shut up…it was nice to have a small break from it. Twice during the period, Karin punched him while she walked by to sharpen her pencil. It was like Sasuke's fangirls had become his own personal army!
After history, they had psychology class, where Kakashi was late…as usual. Sasuke retold the sad story about how he'd always had a crush on Naruto and how Naruto had kissed him last night and admitted he returned the feelings, only to reject Sasuke today at lunch. Since the class was small and intimate, Kakashi decided it was okay to have story time instead of a lesson. Naruto wasn't there, of course, because he got punched in the nose by Sasame in the hallway and was at the nurse. But still, through Sasuke's retelling, one person remained totally unconvinced.
"What's going on?" Neji asked Sasuke when the two were alone. "I know you're gay and all, but I also know that Naruto hasn't even been a blimp on your radar until yesterday. Besides, you're not the type to get all upset over a rejection. Gaara and I spoke about it, and we agreed that something's fishy." Well, Sasuke wasn't exactly surprised that he hadn't fooled Neji and Gaara. Gaara was always too observant for his own good, and Neji was just as smart.
"You got me," Sasuke said, holding his hands up in mock surrender as he smirked. "Let's just say that it's a part of my plan to get rid of the fan girls…for good."
"So far it seems to be working," the Hyuga commented, noticing that most of the fangirls were focusing more on Naruto than on Sasuke. "I'm glad to finally have a conversation with you without hearing squeals of 'Sasuke-kun' constantly."
"Tell me about it," Sasuke said as the blond entered the room, a tissue held to his nose to keep it from bleeding. He sat down at his usual seat and was swarmed by Tsure and Karin, who were yelling at him about something (three guesses as to what). Naruto raised his arms to shield himself from getting hit when Neji continued.
"So, why Naruto Uzumaki of all people?" he asked Sasuke as he followed his gaze. "Does my little Sasuke-kun have a crush?" he asked with a smirk. Sasuke scoffed, the remark not even deserving a glare.
"Please," he said. "I do have standards."
Finally, with five minutes left of the period, Kakashi finally decided to hand out a sheet detailing a project. And of course it was a project that they'd work on in partners. And of course, it was Kakashi who chose the partners. He claimed he chose the partners last night before any of this happened, but Naruto didn't exactly believe him when he and Sasuke were paired together for their second project together. Sasuke wasn't particularly happy at that either, but at least spending more time with Naruto would give more credence to the rumors.
Usually, Kakashi pissed Sasuke off when he interfered. Technically, he was Sasuke's guardian, and he's the closest thing Sasuke had to a father since he was six, but he still pissed the Ucihha off. He always meddled in things that weren't his business, and it usually ended up badly for him. But this time, Sasuke wasn't mad at all. In fact, one could say it was fate that he paired him with Naruto again. After all, he loved being able to rub Naruto's face in his plan for another few minutes.
Too soon, however, the class was over, and it was time for the last period of the day: health with the perverted Jiraya Senin. And knowing that the rumors about Naruto and himself had spread throughout the school already, Sasuke smirked, knowing that Jiraya would probably make some perverted remark about Naruto during the class. It was really all too perfect.
As they shuffled in, Jiraya was putting away a few copies of Hustler magazine into his desk, and asked his usual question. "Welcome back, class. Did anyone have sex last night?" Instead of the usual groans from the other students in the class, there were awkward looks sent towards Naruto and Sasuke, and the latter smirked inwardly at the outburst Naruto made upon realizing this.
"I did not have sex with that bastard last night!" he exclaimed rather loudly. It took all Sasuke's effort not to just burst out laughing. Instead, he scowled, pretending to be irritated by Naruto's attitude. Sasuke looked at Jiraya, and saw he had an amused expression on his face.
"Aw, and you even have an adorable pet name for him," Jiraya said, ruffling Naruto's hair. "Now I know why you didn't want to see pictures of naked girls in class yesterday, huh?" Naruto flushed in embarrassment and anger, beginning to sputter. "It's okay," Jiraya continued. "Today we will be reading a book instead."
"A book?" Sakura asked from her seat behind me. This was unusual. It seemed everyone in the classroom was confused as to the new direction this class would take.
"Yes, a book," Jiraya said to the pinkette behind me. "It's a written work or composition that has been published. You can generally find them in libraries and book stores, although now you can get them on e-readers as well."
"I know what a book is," Sakura huffed before muttering "pervert" under her breath.
"This book is called Icha Icha Paradise, and it was written by yours truly," the teacher said with a stupid grin. Hm, he usually only grinned like that when he watched porn. What kind of book was it? As he handed out the books, Sasuke got his answer, staring at the cover of the book. So this is why he chose to stop looking at pictures of naked girls and start reading. It was an erotic novel! Sasuke didn't know why he was surprised. If anyone wouldn't surprise him by writing a smutty book, it would be Jiraya.
"What do you suggest for people like Naruto and I who don't…appreciate…the content," Sasuke asked, inwardly applauding at the way he was able to throw more attention at the blonde's sexuality. A few people sniggered, but Jiraya's eyes widened.
"Are you saying that you two did have sex?" he asked, slightly surprised. "I'm going to assume that you topped, Sasuke." Sasuke smirked at this, mentally counting down the seconds until Nrauto's outburst. 3…2…1…
"WE DID NOT FUCKING HAVE SEX!" Naruto yelled from across the room. He threw his book towards the front, hitting Jiraya in the head with it.
"No, we didn't," Sasuke agreed calmly. "You see, Mr. Senin, Naruto's so confused about his sexual orientation that he decided to use me to experiment, giving no regards towards my feelings on the matter." People seemed a little shocked that Ssauke spoke. That might be the most he'd spoken in that class all semester. Was he being too out of character?
"Experimentation," Jiraya said to himself while rubbing his chin, thinking about what Sasuke had just said. "Class, I think I have another idea for a lesson plan today. Naruto, will you stand up and come to the front of the class?"
"W-What?" Naruto asked, his eyes wide. 'What did I just get him into?' Sasuke smirked slightly and leaned back, deciding to enjoy whatever show was about to play out in front of him.
"I asked you to come up here," Jiraya repeated, tapping his foot in impatience. "Are you gay and deaf?"
"I'm not gay," Naruto muttered before standing up and walking to the front of the room. Sasuke couldn't believe that his plan to humiliate Naruto had worked so well. This is above and beyond what he'd expected. He patted himself on the back, mentally of course.
"I want you to look at a few of these pictures and tell me what you think," Jiraya sensei said. He first put up a diagram of the female reproductive system, and Naruto shrugged. He then put up a picture of a naked girl who…damn! Those things were, like, size GG! It's amazing those things weren't falling off! Naruto's eyes bugged out and his jaw dropped immediately upon seeing the picture, to which Jiraya chuckled. "You don't have to overcompensate," he said, patting the blonde's head. "None of us care that you're gay. You don't have to pretend anymore." The entire class snickered, and Sasuke would have joined in had he not had too much decorum. But yeah, he was enjoying this.
"I'm not gay," Naruto muttered again, glaring at the teacher. Then, Jiraya shocked everyone in the room by doing something that no one would ever expect him to do. He put up a picture of a naked guy. They didn't even think he had diagrams of a guy, let alone pictures. Immediately, Naruto looked away in disgust, as did most of the guys in the class. Sasuke just sat there with a bored expression, not really caring. Sure, the guy was good looking, but thankfully, Sasuke didn't let hormones run his life.
Jiraya clicked off the projector and unplugged it before sending Naruto back to his seat. "Okay class, I'm now entirely sure of Naruto's sexual orientation." Naruto immediately hid his head in his hands on his desk as the teacher began to speak again. "He's definitely gay, but he's hidden so far in the closet that he's convinced himself he's straight." Sasuke nearly laughed right then and there at the red that had spread all the way to Naruto's ears, which were still visible while his head was hidden. Although a part of Sasuke was really entertained by all this, a part of him did feel bad, too. He heard a distinct pounding noise as Naruto beat his head against his desk.
"I offer extra credit to anyone who can get Naruto to admit he's gay, and even more extra credit to anyone who can successfully set him up with Sasuke," Jiraya said with a look of self-satisfaction on his face as Sasuke's jaw dropped and Naruto burst out.
"WHAT?" he exclaimed. For once, Sasuke had to really agree with him. What gave Jiraya the right to do that? All Naruto or Sasuke would have to do to get him fired would be go to the school board. What kind of school did he think this was?
"C'mon, Naruto," Sakura said from behind me. "Everyone knows Sasuke's hot! What's stopping you?"
"I'm not gay!" Naruto yelled for what must have been the twentieth time that day. Ignoring him, Sakura turned to me, rubbing the Uchiha's shoulder supportively.
"Don't worry, Sasuke," she said. "As soon as Naruto realizes who he is and comes out, he'll be ready to be with you. He only rejected you because he's still in denial and thinks he's straight." Sasuke wasn't sure whether to be amazed at Sakura's stupidity for falling for this, or to be happy that she was helping paint him as a victim. The more victimized Sasuke seemed, the more Naruto would be pushed into a corner.
"I guess you're right," Sasuke said to Sakura. He had one final thing to say, so he turned to Naruto. "But I won't wait for you forever, so hurry up."
SNSNSN
Sasuke realized after he got home that he must have inherited Itachi's sadistic streak. To be honest…he was pretty harsh back there. Sure, Naruto sort of deserved it for lying to him, but at the same time, Sasuke couldn't help the gnawing feeling of guilt that was beginning to creep up on him again. Not only did Sasuke ruin Naruto's chance at finding a girl in high school, but he also made Naruto look like a complete asshole. As impressive as it was, it was also a little jarring when Sasuke realized just how much that could hurt him. It really was something Itachi would do.
It was just like the previous day when Itachi insinuated that he and Naruto were together. Or like when Sasuke first invited Sakura over to the mansion and Itachi made her think that he invited over for a date. Or that time that he told Neji that Sasuke was too busy doing a voodoo ritual to hang out with him. Come to think of it, he was becoming just like Itachi.
That thought actually scared Sasuke a bit. He really hated Itachi because of how much he tried to torture him. Sasuke looked in the mirror on the back of his bedroom door, and saw that he physically resembled him too. It was like he was becoming his brother – evil and sadistic. Sure, neither of them were evil in the sense that they'd hurt or kill someone, but Sasuke just might have ruined Naruto's life. With the exception of his very close friends, no one who lived here would ever think of Naruto as more than a closeted homosexual.
Sasuke's train of thought was interrupted, ironically, when Itachi came into the room. "Your blond boy toy is downstairs," he said nonchalantly. "He wants to talk to you." Sasuke didn't really have the energy to scowl at his brother, as he was wondering why Naruto was here. But Sasuke actually felt like he wanted to see him. He had this insane urge to apologize. He rushed down the hallway, but slowed down before he reached the stairs…he didn't want to seem too eager to apologize.
"Naruto?" Sasuke asked when he saw the blond standing in the foyer. "What are you doing here?" Sasuke finished walking down the stairs when Naruto turned around to face him, glare in place.
"What the fuck was that all about!" he yelled, glaring at the raven. "I know I backed out of our fucked up deal, but what you did was uncalled for."
"You're right," Sasuke said after a couple of seconds, causing Naruto to gape at me. "I shouldn't have gone so far with making people think you're a confused, gay asshole who broke my heart."
"Yeah," Naruto agreed softly, somewhat confused at my apology. Hm, who knew there was more than one volume to his voice? "That was a little overkill. You could have just stopped at confused and gay and still gotten your point across." Wait, was that…a joke?
"I was just glad that coming out and pretending to have a huge ass crush on you was just what I needed to get the fangirls off my back," Sasuke said, wondering what Naruto would do now that Sasuke had admitted that he went to far.
"Yeah, and I'm sorry, by the way," Naruto said, the grin gone from his face. Sasuke furrowed his brow in confusion. Why would he be sorry?
"For what?" the Uchiha asked, confused. It's not like he really had anything to apologize for, right?
"Well, after you tell the truth tomorrow, you'll be glommed by fan girls again," Naruto said. Yeah, that's true…hold on…
"When did I ever say I was going to tell the truth?" Sasuke asked, causing him to gape.
"I-I thought you said you were sorry," he said. His eyes were growing wide, realizing that Sasuke had no intention to go back in time, or to undo this mess.
"I did," Sasuke confirmed. "But I never said I'd tell the truth. I still need to keep the fangirls off my back. I told you what you have to do if you really want to salvage this."
"No!" he immediately yelled, rejecting Sasuke's offer. Jeez, why'd he have to always be so loud? Where was the volume control that Sasuke had witnessed a few seconds ago?
"Listen, you can kill two birds with one stone," Sasuke suggested. "We pretend to date, which will keep the fangirls off my back, and then, I'll break up with you in a few weeks, and you can play the victim. The girls will glom onto you and you can have anyone you want. It's a win/win."
"No!" he repeated, his volume even louder.
"If you don't agree, I could always spend the night coming up with new and more creative ways to ruin your reputation," Sasuke offered with a shrug, prompting Naruto to narrow his eyes.
"You wouldn't dare," he said. In all honesty, Sasuke didn't relish going any further with this, but he would if he had to. His peace and sanity had to come before Naruto's high school reputation.
"Try me," Sasuke challenged, smirking at Naruto's glare. It's not like he really could challenge Sasuke after what he pulled today. He'd have to take a pretty big gamble for that.
"Fine," he said, which actually surprised the Uchiha. Sasuke didn't actually expect Naruto to agree so soon. "But there are a few conditions." Oh, great…what now? "I still owe Ino $50 because she offered to be your girlfriend instead of me."
"That's pocket change," Sasuke said, dismissively waving his hands. He looked surprised at how quickly he conceded to that demand before continuing.
"You offered to do my project," he reminded the raven. "I still want you to do that, and do the one for psychology, too."
"I'm only doing the history one," Sasuke said, putting his foot down. "You can help with the psychology one." Naruto glared at him before finally accepting.
"Fine," he muttered. "But I also want those dates with Sakura when this is all over." Well, that could be a problem now that she thought Sasuke and Naruto were actually going to be together, but that didn't stop Sasuke from agreeing. He could cross that bridge when he came to it. "Good, then I'll meet you tomorrow on the side of the school." Naruto turned and left, leaving Sasuke standing alone in the foyer.
With that, Sasuke went upstairs to begin doing homework. He had an entire project he had to do, too. He silently cursed his guilt as he made his way up the stairs. If it wasn't for him offering the original deal to satisfy his own guilt, he wouldn't have so much work to do in the space of just a few weeks. Oh well, at least he won't have to worry about the fangirls.

Author’s Note: If you would like to receive an update every time I update, please e-mail me at soapmaster-fanfics @ Hotmail . com with the subject “Not Just Another Fake Boyfriend Story.” I will add your e-mail to a mailing list to be sent out with each new chapter. Aside from that, remember to review the chapter as a common courtesy.
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Not Just Another Fake Boyfriend Story