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Barfly	By : Letta Category: Naruto > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 1538 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-Barfly
- 2-Part II
- 1
- 2
A/N: Finally done! Watch
me rebel against weepy-uke Naruto! I mean seriously,
he was trained by Jiraiya and Kakashi. Seriously.
Jeesh.
Come on. Really. Or something.
Warnings: You ever write
something and then a few months later, continue it and it has a different feel?
So yeah, that�s your warning.
--

-

--

�You can�t make up numbers!� Neji said, slamming his empty
glass down on the bar.� Next to him, his
partner from the mission they had just completed looked decidedly
uncomfortable.� In fact, Uzumaki Naruto
had been uneasy around bars for months, and at first for a few weeks, had
adamantly refused to even go into one.

That was finally ended when one particularly determined team
that had been assigned to him physically forced him through the door of a
bar.� Rumor has it the team consisted of
Kiba, Ino, and Lee.� There was some
question later on of the mental health of the person who had grouped together
those four and the seemingly unrelated decreased workload (increased boredom)
of the Hokage.

�I wasn�t arguing with you,� Naruto pointed out, having yet
to even touch the drink that someone (presumably Neji) had set out before him.

�That psychology -you can�t prove, people make it up, but
you can�t fake numbers,� Neji continued, as if Naruto had never spoken.

�I�ve never even studied psychology,� Naruto said, ignoring
the fact that the academy and various other steps along the career path of a
shinobi included lessons on the subject.�
Something to do with the importance of knowing, understanding, and
predicting the enemy �at least he thought that�s what Sakura said, but he was
in the process of droning out her impending speech at the time.� The blonde had racked up quite a few sick
days that suspiciously corresponded with scheduled seminar dates �which had
prompted the aforementioned speech.

�Psychology is someone�s opinion,� Neji said, hands fisted
passionately, and nearly knocking over his own glass, which was empty, but the
blonde suspected would be refilled at any moment.

�I�ve seen you use it pretty often in battle,� Naruto
commented, �How many have you had?��
There were several empty glasses and cups on their table, none of them
Naruto�s, not all Neji�s �as they had made friends in the bar who now seemed to
have abandoned them- but there were still quite a few.

�That�s not the point, Naruto.�

�I don�t think there was a point.�

�You need to loosen up,� Neji said, and whether or not that
was the point was a mystery.

Naruto blinked, and almost laughed at the irony of Neji saying
something like that to him �or anyone.� He would�ve laughed, too, but he was
currently terrified.

Well, maybe that was an overstatement, but he certainly
wasn�t comfortable with his current location.�
A bar, outside of Konoha.�

The only reason he was here (and the reason why he was able
to keep himself from grabbing his weapons defensively) was because Neji was
with him.� Glancing at his inebriated
partner, he wondered if that was really doing him much good.

�Why are you so edgy?� Neji asked, eyes looking surprisingly
clear, and voice unslurred (although Naruto suspected
that was a trick or an illusion the Hyuga had picked
up somewhere to fool people into thinking he might not be drunk, despite the
fact the he otherwise seemed incapable of acting sober).

�I�m not,� the blonde denied.

�Yes you are.�

�Am not.�

�Are too.�

�Let me go get you some more,� Naruto said, grabbing the
empty pitcher and heading up towards the bar �effectively ending the argument.� Of course, Naruto giving up on an argument
would only increase Neji�s concern, if not for the
fact that the Hyuga prodigy was very drunk and would
forget about it long before Naruto returned.

If not that, then Uzumaki Naruto volunteering to get up and
have a pitcher refilled when there was nothing at the bar to catch his interest
(say a pretty young lady, free ramen, a jutsu scroll, a slimy toad�) would alarm most of his
friends.

Naruto looked at his free hand as he set the pitcher on the
counter and waited for the bartender.� Balled to the point of white knuckles.� So maybe he couldn�t fully relax it from a
fist, that didn�t mean anything.

�Another one?� the bartender asked, taking the empty jug.

�Yeah� and a shot of whiskey,� Naruto added, figuring that
one shot probably wasn�t going to do much harm.�
His tolerance would be a little low since he hadn�t been exercising it, so
it would just be enough to relax him a little and then maybe Neji would shut
up.

When it came down to it, that�s all he really wanted: Neji
to shut up.

He never thought he would feel that way about Neji.

A full pitcher and a full shot glass were set before him a
moment later, so after downing the shot, he made his way back to Neji, whom he
would find, had still not shut up.�

*

Somehow -Naruto wasn�t sure how- but somehow Neji had
managed to talk him into a drinking game.�
It involved dice.

Fortunately, Naruto had always found himself to be
inordinately lucky when it came to various forms of gambling, so he had only
taken in a little bit of alcohol, while Neji looked thoroughly trashed, but at
the same time, managed to pull it off while looking dignified.� That was a complete mystery to Naruto.

Aside from failures in trying to argue with people �Naruto-
about subjects they didn�t care about �anything remotely intellectual- Neji was
a rather quiet drunk (but since he spent most of his time trying to argue until
it was noon-day sun shining right in your eyes blindingly clear that no one was
going to argue with him, that almost meant nothing).� However, he was an imaginative drunk.

Naruto discovered this after returning from the bathroom to
find that the Hyuuga had managed to get a small stack
of paper and a pencil and was busy drawing out battle plans, musical scores,
and futuristic technology (which Neji explained was a refrigeration unit for
when he went into outer space).�

Why the Hyuga ever thought he
might decide to try a swing in outer space was not something Naruto really
cared to dwell on, and considering the results of the genius�s current
cognitive thought processes, he sure as hell wasn�t going to ask.

Later, Neji managed to find a guy who could play piano and
had him play his composition.� Halfway
through, when Naruto was about to go over and put an end to the rendition, Neji
leaned over conspiratorially and said, �It sounded better in my head.�

That was shortly followed by, �He�s playing it wrong.�� Naruto was fairly certain the pianist wasn�t
playing it wrong �that was just how bad it was.

At least the battle plans had some merit.

�Naruto.�

The shinobi in question turned back to his companion, to see
that Neji was pushing an empty pitcher towards him while pointing with his
other hand towards the bar.� Naruto felt
he should protest, but he never quite got to that point before he found himself
on his feet and giving in to Neji�s not-quite-demands.

When he stepped forward, he noticed that the timing of the
rest of the world seemed slightly off from his movements.

A shot of panic ran through him.

/It�s
okay, I�m just a little tipsy.� Nothing to worry about.� No psychotic evil genius ninjas in sight.� Save Neji./

For some reason, the mental pep talk actually worked, which
was strange, because they rarely actually did.�

The second (or maybe third) time that night Naruto found himself at the bar, setting down an empty pitcher and asking
for another.

�He�ll take two cups of sake, also.�

Naruto�s blood ran cold as he recognized the voice.

�Itachi?� he asked, not turning around.� He had just looked around the damn bar to see
if the bastard was here!� Quickly, he
whipped his head around, saw Itachi standing right behind him,
and quickly turned back to face the bar.�
He raised a hand to hide the side of his face that Itachi could see, as
if that would hide him.� Despite his
efforts, Naruto did not fool the genius.

�Hello, Naruto-kun.�

�You�d better be paying for those.�� Looking back, Naruto decided he probably
should�ve said something different, but he had a thing for saying the first
thing to enter his head.

Of course, by answering, he was giving up the charade, so he
angled his body so he could at least keep an eye on Itachi.� My his hair looked
soft� softer than Naruto remembered.� If
he had to guess, he would say that the Uchiha was probably using salon quality
shampoo and conditioner.�

If the S-class criminal noticed how the Konoha shinobi was
staring at him (or rather, his hair) he didn�t say anything.� Nor did he say anything when the blonde
snapped back to himself and drummed his fingers on the bar, trying to ignore
the fact that he had been staring.

Two cups of sake were set before Naruto, who was glad for
the not-quite-interruption as Itachi stepped up next to him.� The elder Uchiha dropped a couple coins on
the counter and gestured to Naruto to drink up.

Despite rationality, Naruto was thoroughly ingrained with
the teachings of Jiraiya and Tsunade, which included never turning down a free
drink.

Rationality wasn�t really what Naruto was known best for
anyway (neither were Jiraiya or Tsunade, or for that matter, the last member of
the Legendary Three).� Later he would
decide to find new mentors, but when trying to think of replacements all he would
be able to come up with were Kakashi, Anko, and Gai, he would then find himself very nearly starting to sob
into his pillow.� Instead he�d make a
late night call to Sakura�s apartment who would listen emphatically (she was
familiar with Tsunade�s methods, after all) while patting him gently on the
back and making him a cup of instant ramen.�
After twenty minutes, she�d get annoyed because she didn�t do well with
a lack of rest and tell him to either sleep on her couch or get the hell out
because she was going back to bed.

Setting the second cup back down next to the now empty
first, Naruto turned to face Itachi �who had apparently taken to leaving his
Akatsuki cloak behind when going out, and found the Uchiha close enough that
they could smell the alcohol on each other�s breath.� His teeth were still brilliantly white.

�What are you doing here?� Naruto asked, losing any sort of
a real demanding tone with the drinks he had consumed, and continually finding
his eyes glued to various attractive features.

�The same thing you are.�

�You�re hanging out with Neji, too?�

�No, I�m drinking.�

�Well, I�m hanging out with Neji, he�s awesome.�

�Hm,� Itachi said, waving over
another cup of sake that was soon placed in front of Naruto.

�How many have you had?�

�I didn�t count.�

�Well, you didn�t have enough,� Naruto said, trying to tear his eyes away from a well defined jaw
before picking up the sake and drinking it, �so you should have this pitcher
here, and I�ll just be going.�

�Have one for the road,� Itachi said, and magically (through
the attentions of a good bartender) another cup appeared in front of Naruto,
replacing his empty one.

�Sure, you as well, for the road.�

Itachi resisted the urge to try and understand that.� He did see that another cup of sake was next
to Naruto�s, though.

The blonde tipped his own cup back (and damn Tsunade and
Jiraiya), setting it empty on the counter.

�You�ve finished your sake,� Itachi commented, gesturing to
the bartender again, who immediately set a cup down in front of Naruto and one
in front of Itachi.

�I�m wise to your game,� Naruto said, looking like he had
just caught the cat in the fishbowl.

�What game would that be?��
There was something amusing about a genius playing stupid.

�The one where you keep ordering more
sake.�

�You looked thirsty.�

�So does your face!� Naruto retorted (probably because he
had been staring at the man�s face), and looking for all the
world like he hadn�t just said something stupid.� One would suppose that was a gift of his,
although not a very useful gift.

�My face looks thirsty?� Itachi asked, confusion surfacing
just barely in his voice, although without any real expression taking over his
visage �that was probably also a gift.

�Drink your sake,� Naruto said, taking his own advice when
his eyes focused over Itachi�s shoulder.

�I think Kisame�s looking for
you,� he said.

Itachi glanced over his shoulder, but failed to see his
shark-like companion.� He turned back to
Naruto to discover the other shinobi had fled.�

Later, when he sobered up, Itachi would be pissed to
remember that he had fallen for one of Naruto�s drunken diversion tactics.� Especially since Kisame was back at the motel
room.

*

Neji was confused as to why Naruto returned without more
alcohol and then grabbed his arm and ran into the bathroom.

It was a little strange when one of your friends locked
themselves in a bathroom stall with you and then obsessively peered out the
cracks.� Not to say that anything Naruto
ever did was really that normal.

�Hey, what�s going on?� Neji whispered, but it came out as a
stage whisper, which were characteristically loud despite being whispers.

�Shh!� If he finds me, he�s going to keep buying me
drinks!�

There was silence for a moment while Neji tried to figure
out what was going on.

�Can I meet him?�

�No!� Naruto snapped as quietly as he could while still
putting in a proper amount of emphasis.

After ten minutes, Neji lost his patience and managed to
fight his way out of the stall and managing to get a very strange look from the
other guy who was in there washing his hands.

Not wanting his friend to face peril alone, Naruto
reluctantly followed Neji back out.

Before they stepped out the door, Naruto paused in front of
one of the mirrors.

�I thought people were supposed to get better looking the
more I drink.�

Neji glanced at him.

�I think I look worse,� Naruto said in explanation, running
a hand up his face and through his hair.�
Neji grabbed him by the sleeve and pulled him out of the room.

A quick scan of the crowded room when they reentered failed
to reveal any Akatsuki members, to Naruto�s relief.

Of course, by then, the sake he had drunk caught up to him
and he couldn�t be bothered to think that maybe he should leave anyway (since
Itachi seemed to have no qualms about killing large amounts of people at once,
so a crowded bar wouldn�t hardly slow him down). �Thus, Naruto sat back down at his table with
Neji and told him it was his turn to go get a pitcher.

It wasn�t, because Naruto had never actually returned with
one, but Neji didn�t argue �breaking his drunken pattern.

About twenty minutes later, Neji announced that he had to go
to the bathroom for real and Naruto was left happily pouring himself another
glass.

As it was, he was caught by surprise when Itachi sat down
next to him with his own empty glass and poured himself some as well.

�Hey, that�s not yours,� Naruto said, �you
didn�t buy it.� Neji bought it.�

�He said I could have some,� Itachi answered.

�No he didn�t.�

�I�m taking some anyway.�

�Well alright,� the Konoha shinobi said, as if that settled
everything.

Naruto took a drink from his glass, before saying, �How�d
you know I was still here?�

�I watched you drag your friend into the bathroom.�

�Oh, right� stealth.��
The Uchiha could only guess that Naruto was referring to a lack thereof.

Itachi chose not to comment, instead enjoying his stolen
alcohol, which he was apparently allowed to have.

Somehow, they started talking about Kabuto.

�I guess I don�t see the motivation.�

�He is the right-hand man.�

�And his boss is Orochimaru,�
Naruto pressed.

�Pay and power.�

�Yeah, but have you ever really talked to Orochimaru?� He�s got this creepy snake-obsession and
inappropriate interests in your brother,� Naruto argued.

�Wanting his body as his next vessel?� It won�t do him much good.�

�Yeah, Sasuke is kind of weak.�

�Very.�

�Have you seen him lately?�

�Orochimaru?�

�No, Sasuke.�

�No,� Itachi answered.

�They�re dressing alike.�

There was silence for a moment.

�Sasuke is officially kicked out of the Uchiha clan.�� Never mind the clan only consisted of two
people.� It was like kids with a
clubhouse.

�You should maybe send him a letter.�

Itachi seemed to think it was a good idea and tried writing
on a napkin before noticing Neji�s stack of
papers.� As for the Hyuuga
himself, he had stopped at the bar before returning to the table, and was
currently explaining to a redhead how to make a nuclear reactor out of common
household items.

Naruto grabbed the letter when Itachi was finished and read
it aloud.� �Sasuke, you�re out of the
clan for bad fashion choices.� Deal with
it.� Itachi.�

�You have nice handwriting.�

�Thank you.�

Suddenly, a thought struck Naruto.

�Say, why are you here, anyway?�

At this, Naruto was given a very pointed look that he chose
to interpret incorrectly, either willingly or not.

�Another pitcher?�

Itachi didn�t bother to answer that.

Naruto chose to stare at the Uchiha in the way where he squinted his eyes.

�You have really nice skin, you know that? �It�s looks baby soft.� Ever rub your skin against a baby�s to
compare it?�

�No.�

�Maybe you should.�

�No.�

Then a callused hand was on his face, and Naruto was looking
at him with intensity.

�Baby soft,� the Konoha nin said, stressing the word �baby�.

Itachi�s lips tightened slightly as his eyes hooded in
something reminiscent of annoyance and frustration.�

Naruto squinted at him again, catching sight of the hand
that was holding the glass to Itachi�s mouth.

�Your hands look really� delicate.� I bet you could do a lot of things with them
though.� Like�

�Like?�

At the question, blue eyes lidded heavily as a mouth turned
up mischievously.

�Let�s go have man-sex.�

*

Neji had returned from the bathroom (and the bar where he
had finished explaining to a young brunette woman why sparrows were the most
useless bird) to find Naruto gone, but with two half empty glasses left on the
table.� He sat down for a moment,
drinking what was left of the contents of the glass he had.

�Byakugan!� he yelled, loudly
enough to draw attention from several of the patrons, who looked at him oddly.

Apparently they were unaware that he was a ninja.

They were also unaware that he had special ninja abilities,
which was probably why they gaped at him for so long.

*

After a brief stop at the post office to drop a letter into
the overnight chute, Naruto found himself shoved up
roughly against an alley wall, a lean body pressed hungrily against his.

When he found a mouth covering his own, he forgot just why
exactly he was trying to avoid this reunion.�
Of course, when he focused on the question, he suddenly was supplied
with plenty of reasons, but he was good at ignoring reasoning and common sense,
and really, survival instinct.

He figured as long as they kept this between the two of
them, it probably wouldn�t be an issue.

Probably.

Of course, he was a little terrified of this man (between
kidnapping, murder, and all sorts of things shinobi did but Itachi was much
better at), though it seemed most people were.�
For some reason, however, he wasn�t really scared at the moment.� Maybe it was the fact that Itachi wasn�t
attacking him in a harmful manner, maybe it was copious amounts of alcohol he
had taken in despite his better judgment.�
Maybe it was just stupidity.

All three reasons had valid points.

Since thinking things through had never been Naruto�s strong
point, he responded to the Uchiha�s advances and gave as good as he got,
deciding (without consulting the part of his brain that controlled logic) that
improvisation in the sexual arts was probably the best course of action.� As a general rule -again made without the use
of logic- he never questioned himself, which would explain what his hands were
doing inside Itachi�s shirt.

One hand clutched at a strong back, the other smoothing down
a stomach, lingering near the waistline of the darker man�s pants.

Suddenly, a thought struck Naruto.

�Hey, hey, Itachi��

The man paused briefly at the tan neck, indicating that he
was listening before resuming his task.

�You�re not just trying to seduce me� you know, so you can,
um, capture me and stuff?�

That was really his one hold-up.� Never mind the fact that Itachi was an enemy
of his home village or Tsunade would beat him into tiny bits of pulp or that he
was indirectly responsible for pretty much all of Naruto�s Sasuke-issues.� Naruto had a lot of issues, too, of which a
majority were Sasuke related.

�No.�

�I would.�

He received a strange look.

Then Naruto relaxed again, until he realized that the answer
could have been a convenient lie to lure him into a false sense of security
while the plan would continue on.

�You have to tell me if you are, because� that�s not fair�
otherwise,� Naruto said, struggling with words as his mind fumbled around drunkenly
�it was especially hard when someone had taken a liking to the taste of your
collarbone and was currently gripping your hips rather possessively.

This time, the missing-nin pulled
back, eyes half lidded (either from intoxication, seriousness, or lust, Naruto
wasn�t sure), and paused before answering.

�If I captured you right now, and the Akatsuki found out
how, I would never live it down.�

There was a moment of silence while that sunk in.� Normally it would amuse him that Itachi
actually admitted that and feared (would be annoyed by) the jests and social mocking
by his peers, however he was not in a state to appreciate the novelty.

�Well good.�

Itachi started to lean in again.

�Say, Itachi?�

This time, Naruto was positive he heard an irritated sigh.� Probably because he did.� Itachi was no doubt reaching for something to
stab him with.

�What?�

�Is an alley the best place for this?� I don�t know about you� but, uh, I have
people that, uh, want to kill me, which might actually include you� and there�s
only one way out.�

Whether he realized it or not, Naruto had actually made a
very good point, even if he forgot the fact that he was a shinobi and should be
able to scale the walls.

However, despite the genius of the one, neither of them were well versed in the drunken usage of chakra on the fly,
and considering Itachi was a member of an elite organization and a shinobi
genius, he really should have thought of that himself.

Even Naruto had
figured it out.

Itachi made a note to himself about brushing up on strategy
that he probably wouldn�t remember in the morning.

For now he would just content himself with thinking that
Naruto had more experience with alcohol.�
Which was actually true.

-

They climbed in through the window crashing onto the bed of
the hotel room, because breaking in was easier than trying to find the key since
Naruto wasn�t sure which pocket he put it in and get it into the lock.

That was how Naruto found himself with a mouth full of
Itachi�s ponytail as the missing-nin tried to push
himself off his back (and consequently, off of Naruto).

It never would have happened if Naruto�s pants-leg hadn�t
gotten caught on the windowsill forcing him to grab onto Itachi as he lost his
balance.

Unfortunately, Itachi�s balance wasn�t up to par as he had
been in the awkward position of being mostly through the window and drunk.� To a genius shinobi it would have to be
embarrassing �even the stoic unemotional ones.

Naruto felt something hard hit him �that felt suspiciously
like the handle of a kunai- just under the ribs, and couldn�t help but think it
was intentional.� It was.

However, the Konoha nin had a
unique ability of bringing people over to his side, save Sasuke �who didn�t
count anyway, because he was a bastard, and as he hooked one leg over Itachi�s
hip, he grabbed his collar (since he had just managed to turn himself around)
and pulled him downwards for contact, making peace.

Itachi could be quite agreeable when it suited him.� Such as now.

The truce was finalized when Itachi shoved one hand into
blonde hair, and the other up the jounin vest that
Naruto so proudly wore.� Apparently
Naruto�s mission hadn�t required shinobi anonymity.� Still, it seemed dangerous to wear it out
drinking, if you ignored the fact that he and his companion were both very
strong shinobis.�
Even if one (Neji) turned out to be an uncommonly strange drunk and the
other (Naruto) a paranoid nymphomaniac.

In Itachi�s opinion.

At least they hadn�t been wearing their hitae-ate.

With a little speed and skill, Naruto was no longer wearing
his vest, either. In fact, it seemed like the blonde didn�t even notice, not
even when he was divested of his shirt as well.�
He was supposed to be a jounin?

So Itachi decided to see if Naruto would notice if his pants
went missing, too.� Until, that is, he
sensed an attack more than saw it.�

Unfortunately for Itachi, his reaction time was slower than
usual due to his planned inebriation, and his right arm shouldn�t have shot out
so far and missed.� The sound of tearing
cloth made him look down at his chest, to see that, for the second time since
he had known Naruto, the blonde had shredded one of his shirts.

Really now, was it so hard to just take it off the normal
way?

The blonde had also gotten a little close in a spot or two,
as thin red lines appeared on Itachi�s navel and the middle of his chest,
though refusing to bleed.

Naruto was staring at them.

�Heh heh� sorry?�

Itachi wondered, not for the first time, what had kept him
from just killing Naruto every time the option became available.� Aside from the direct orders from the
Akatsuki wanting him alive and the self-control, that is.

His chest stung slightly, until he felt something warm and
damp slide up it, and realized that he was looking down at a head of blonde
hair.

It was like lightening shooting through his veins, only less
painful.� It mostly seemed to end in the
same place, though.� Somewhere
below his beltline.

It was encouragement enough to shrug off the ruined
shirt.� He suspected, though, if he kept
up with these encounters, he was going to have to be buying a lot of shirts in
the future.� Thankfully, pay was good in
the world of super-elite criminal organizations.

Naruto continued up Itachi�s throat, grabbing the back of
his neck with a greedy hand, before breaking away and reattaching his lips to
Itachi�s mouth.� The Uchiha responded
almost lethargically, unhurried as he reached down to remove the standard issue
pants of Naruto�s uniform, hands deftly working at the waistline, despite the
alcohol flowing through their veins.

Somehow, Naruto already had the Uchiha�s halfway off.� Itachi had been aware that it had been
happening, but it just� didn�t� register.�

The missing nin
suddenly wondered just how many drinks he had that night.� He had started before he ever spotted Naruto.
�Of course, he had been aware that the
blonde was in the area.

So maybe he had a drink or two before he had heard that two
shinobi from Konoha had been seen, and one happened to bear a striking
resemblance to the bearer of the kyuubi.

That had been excellent reporting from the scout he had
thought to acquire through the use of forbidden jutsus.� Said scout was left to play cards with
Kisame, and if he was half decent at cards, he was probably dead by now.� Kisame was a sore loser and a crappy card
player.

It had been months since the last� encounter� he had with Naruto, and with the bit of alcohol he had
in his system already, it was enough to allow him to convince himself that he
should not tell Kisame about whose location he had heard about, and instead
announce that the shark-like man could play cards with the scout while he went
for a walk.

A walk down to the section of town he had noted earlier that
had at least three bars at first glance.�
Best to confirm an enemy�s presence before taking
actions. �

Actions
such as sucking the salt off of every inch of their skin.

He was bad at lying to himself, but he wasn�t going to admit
why he was really there, either.� At
least, not until he had more to drink.��
By then, however, he happened to notice a lean, muscular body in shinobi
uniform and unruly blonde hair.�

Which had led to him currently being without pants (still
not entirely sure how) and having his neck nearly devoured.� Nerves were tingling throughout his body, but
again, they all seemed to end in the same below-the-beltline place.

The place that had apparently decided to
press urgently against the body below him.� His hips, he found, were moving in a rhythmic
manner that was trying to tell his brain he needed to get on with it.

Naruto was pushing on his chest, urging him to lean
backwards, but he wasn�t in the mood to be so compliant, so he pushed back,
pinning the blonde to the sheets below as he dove in with questing lips.� Desperate hands clutched at him, demanding
more.�

A leg hooked around his hip gripped tighter, and Itachi was
reminded of the fact that the body below him was still wearing pants.� Until Naruto started squirming and taking
them off himself.� Itachi raised himself
slightly to allow the other shinobi the room to unclothe himself
further.

He knew when not to impede progress.

Naruto, for his part, managed to fumble around minimally
before realizing his sandals were still on.�
He would�ve felt stupid if he wasn�t drunk.� The blonde assured himself that was an
excuse.� He managed to kick one off and the
other came off when it got caught in his pants leg (he was really starting to
think he should start wearing shorts) �which he also kicked off.

Somehow, Naruto also managed to remove Itachi�s boxers in
the same move.�

He seemed pretty pleased with himself about that one, too,
the smug bastard.� So Itachi ripped his
off with his bare hands.� Naruto wondered
if he could possibly repair the seams, because that was one of his lucky pairs
(he had three, one of which was a gift) and it would be unfortunate later on if
he ended up in an unlucky situation without the right boxers.� The major point, however (or at least the one
that would come up first), was that whether he liked it or not, they both knew
that Naruto was going commando in the morning.

For some reason, that thought made Itachi feel a sudden
urgency as he pressed his hips into Naruto�s thigh.� The blonde started squirming again, and
managed to sit up, forcing Itachi on his haunches, as Naruto reached towards
the foot of the bed, grabbing his pants that were still hooked on one of the
posts and rifling through the pockets, before retrieving a small bottle of oil.

The label very cheerily claimed to be suitable for both
genders, and was specially made for a chain of stores that Naruto prayed Sakura
would never find out he went through the doors of.� She would beat the crap out of him, even if Ino had once told him that she was with Sakura once when
the girl was buying an outfit �although for who, Ino
never found out.

Naruto knew that was a lie.�
Ino definitely knew for who.

The Konoha nin
was about to open the bottle, when Itachi grabbed his wrist.� The blonde looked at him questioningly while
a pale hand uncurled his fingers and took the bottle from him.� Then Naruto found himself on his back again,
surprised (but mostly dizzy) at the speed in which it happened.

There was a weight on his thighs, and he could see a dark
head bend down.� His stomach coiled,
electric heat twisting through his veins and he felt an impatience seeping from
the core of his being.

Next there came an intrusion that made him jerk in surprise,
while a distracting mouth was on his neck.�
After that his mind was busying itself with the comprehension of just
where that finger was and just what it was doing.

Itachi slid in another, working his way around.� After a moment they were removed, having
waited long enough, red eyes landed on the face of the shinobi beneath him and
got the sense of impatience from the blonde.�
Naruto gazed at him through half-open eyes, challenge swirling through
them. �Uchiha pride was susceptible to
Uzumaki taunting.� Placing a hand on a
bare thigh, Itachi adjusted the angle of his hips, maintaining eye contact as
he found his target and slid in, oiled and smooth.� It was mostly painless.

For a moment, they were both still.

The Akatsuki nin
found himself gritting his teeth, lips defying him as they trembled slightly,
breathing labored.� It was and wasn�t
like he had expected.� Damn, he was shaking
all over.� He suspected he was cutting
off the circulation in the blonde�s hip and thigh, with how tightly his hands
must be gripping.

A sudden shift from below him, whether it
was an urge to move or not, was enough to break the spell of stillness, compelling
him to begin guiding his hips.� A
few experimental tries with one successful drive which ended in the most
interesting action from Konoha�s own, led the Uchiha to repeat the action.
Naruto wondered if Itachi had been practicing, because he
was doing rather well.� The idea caused
him to have to struggle to hold in snickers as he thought about who the Uchiha
could have practiced with.

Not to say that Itachi was gentle, because with the
possessive marks Naruto found quickly forming on his skin after the Uchiha had
his attentions there, he was pretty sure gentle was not the word.

He had sharp teeth.

And fingernails.

The dark haired man seemed content to tenderly abuse �which
seemed to Naruto the only real way to describe it- every reachable inch of the
tan body below him.� It wasn�t as if the
blonde was complaining (especially since he seemed to be doing the same exact
thing).

Itachi was moving slowly and steadily, and with a restrained
power that made Naruto want to scream.�
He settled for biting his shoulder.�
That was followed by clawing down a pale back, twisting a hand in dark
strands and pulling, and a general digging his heels in wherever he could.� It didn�t do much to persuade the other man
to move faster, though he did seem to become more avid in making marks.

He could forgive him though, because the rocking motion that
managed to end with a burst of white hot sensation
was enough to allow him to ignore those things, then again, when he returned
the favor, there was a certain amount of satisfaction in that, too.

Of course, the skin of the Akatsuki member�s stomach against
his own excited flesh moving tightly and heatedly maybe sped the forgiveness
process.

As for Itachi, he hadn�t realized that sinking into another
person in open vulnerability could be so satisfying, and at the same time, have
satisfaction so elusive, but closer with each repetition. �Any sort of intimacy with another person
usually required him to be highly on guard and alert, but between alcohol and
the knowledge that a powerful demon could be a welcome distraction while he
escaped any possible intruders�� It was
an enjoyable experience.

Despite a quick rise in pleasure and heated need, not to
mention high levels of intoxication, he was still not one to lose control �at
least not anymore than getting it on with an Akatsuki target warranted.� That was why he (aside from fine tremors
running all throughout his body) was able to keep a nice steady pace that was
just slow enough to be agonizing.

Although, he suspected he was starting to lose control, but
he hid it well.
Not as if Naruto would ever tell anyone about any of this anyway,
least of all, any of Itachi�s coworkers.�
They were limited in the number of people they both happened to know.

He surely couldn�t imagine the blonde telling Sasuke�

The Konoha nin
would not fare well on that venture.

Speaking of Naruto, his spine certainly made the most
interesting undulations, especially when he pushed himself forwards just so�� Pause there slightly, watch the expressions
on the face, and smirk.

Itachi could almost pardon the claw marks running down his
arms �although he swore one of those nails broke the skin and if there were
scabs, he�d pull each and every nail out of-

Itachi�s train of thought was abruptly derailed when the leg
hooked over his hips suddenly pulled him down roughly and deeply while a seeking
demanding greedy mouth attached
itself to the underside of his jaw.

Itachi could pardon the claw marks running down his arms.

Especially since Naruto seemed so eager about the whole
set-up �if the hair-pulling was any indication.

Naruto wasn�t really completely conscious of his actions, nothing
new for him, and couldn�t completely be blamed on alcohol.� Pulling on Itachi�s hair and tightly wrapping
his leg around the criminal�s waist while pulling him closer than seemed
physically possible was probably a result of that.

Of course, the biting he decided was necessary would be
included in that list.

Besides, the masochistic bastard seemed to enjoy it, because
Itachi�s pace quickened drastically, as if he couldn�t get enough.

Not that Naruto would complain.� That would just be ungrateful.

So really, that large hickey he left on Itachi�s neck was
just his way of thanking the Uchiha �or more likely, a way to inflict social awkwardness
upon the missing nin at his
return to the Akatsuki.

Either or.

Itachi graciously accepted thanks (since it was
inconceivable �didn�t occur to him-
that it could be anything sinister) by licking up a tan neck and behind the
ear, hips sliding like water along the Konoha shinobi�s
pelvis.�

The water was quickly turning to rapids.

Before either knew it, grasping hands were insistently grasping
anything substantial while hips began to jerk hurriedly, urgency cascading down
like a waterfall.

Naruto stiffened first �unexpectedly soundless- spine
tightened, muscles clenched, arching up and as if pausing there, before falling
back down, a quiet euphoria washing away his senses.

Itachi grit his teeth for another half a minute, jaw
tightened and hair loosening from its tie as he dipped his head to a
collarbone, lips caressing the dazed blonde.�
�

In a moment of surreal clouded-clarity, blinding in its
intensity, he felt as if every nerve in his body was trying to send a signal to
his brain, stumbling with the message.�
He tingled from his toes to the roots of his hair, exhausted and on fire
all at once.

He collapsed, waiting for his arms to regain their ability
to function, noting absently that the alcohol was still heavy in his blood, but
he didn�t really mind, because he felt good, which was becoming rarer for him
these days.

He couldn�t recall the last time he had broken out in a
sweat, but suspected it was a few months ago involving a similar situation with
the same person.� He was right, of
course, but it wouldn�t occur to him later that it might have the potential to
be a rigorous exercise regimen for him that not only would he enjoy, but should
actually have positive results (though maybe not so much in the cardiovascular
area as mood).� However, the next thought
after that would be an immediate dismissal, because he wasn�t so na�ve as to
think the commute to Konoha would go unnoticed by the Akatsuki.�

Let alone trying to get Naruto to agree to such arrangements
�particularly if it meant Itachi becoming better trained only to turn around
and use it to capture the blonde for nefarious S-class criminal organizations.

Naruto seemed like he�d be put off by that.

The Uchiha stayed that way a moment longer, wishful thinking
(although he would not term it as such) taking over his mind, which he blamed
entirely on the drinking and the after effects of good sex.�

Although, he was a
genius, and if he tried hard enough, he could think of a way for the situation
to work and remain a secret.

Beneath him, a pounding heart and laboring lungs echoed into
his ears.

Itachi rolled over, and spent a minute or two on his back,
waiting for his own breathing to calm down and his heart rate to relax.� He was starting to drift off when hands that
weren�t his found themselves below his waist.

His eyes snapped open.

�Hey, you didn�t think we were finished, did you?� It�s my
turn.�

As the kyuubi holder made use of
his bottle of oil and sunk into a not-so-spent as first believed Itachi, the
Akatsuki member learned one more use Naruto made of having virtually unlimited
energy.

-

The sound of an opening door woke them, and as they both
sprung up, Naruto�s eyes widened in horror.

�Naruto?�

�Neji?�

�What are doing in my room?� The pale-eyed man asked,
holding a large rectangular object under his left arm.

�I uh� this is your room?�
I could�ve sworn��

�Your room is next door.�

�Oh.�

Remembering room numbers was useless when climbing in
through a window.

By that point, Neji, being the observant ninja that he was
and Naruto was supposed to be, noticed that not only was his friend stark
naked, but that there was a stark naked person with him� who bore a striking
resemblance to Uchiha Sasuke, especially with the sharingan eyes and all.

If Neji�s memory served him
correctly �which it did- he could name the man as Uchiha Itachi, according to
his bingo book and a meeting or two on the subject of the Akatsuki.�

All in all, what he knew about the man really didn�t explain
the situation that his mind was telling him it was.

The Hyuuga shifted the object he
was carrying under his arm, looking from one gaping shinobi to the other
impassive one.�

�We�re not going to have to fight him, are we?� I�m still a little drunk.�

Naruto attempted to answer, but couldn�t quite form any
words.�

�I�ll be taking my leave, then,� Itachi said, managing to
look dignified while picking up his clothes from the floor after a night of
semi-anonymous sex.� Not to mention that
it was with an enemy and he was currently naked in front of said enemy�s
friend.

Even Neji was impressed by the calm in which the
psychopathic mass murderer did this, and would have to attribute it to good
breeding �though the Hyuuga would say that the
younger Uchiha somehow missed out on this breeding.

In a swirl of smoke Itachi was gone and Naruto was
scrambling to throw on his clothes.�

There was a few minutes of silence (save for the rustling of
cloth) where Neji wasn�t quite sure where to look, so he studied the wall
across from him and wondered if he should really say anything or pretend it had
never happened �although it could turn out to be rather useful information
against his dear friend should the need arise.

�This is why I stopped going to bars!� Naruto said, fumbling
with the last of his clothing as he zipped up his vest.

The Hyuuga allowed that
information to sink in while Naruto�s behavior for the past few months fell
into place.� He was tempted to laugh, but
felt that would result in him having a bloody lip.� Or a broken nose.

�I imagine this is something you�d rather not let the Hokage
in on,� Neji said, breaking the silence.

The look Naruto shot back was enough to strip the paint off
the walls.� Or maybe that was just the
condition of the hotel room.

Suddenly, Naruto�s eyes focused on the object under Neji�s arm.

�Is that a painting?�

�Yes.�

�Where did you get that?� Naruto asked, his earlier issues
momentarily forgotten.

�I painted it, last night,� Neji said,
shifting it around so Naruto could get a better look.

�Oh.� Then, �It�s good.�

-

When Itachi came stumbling back to the current Akatsuki
headquarters once again in a limping state of disrepair, he made sure to use tsukiyomi on the first person who even dared look in his
general direction.

Kisame had made it a point of being out of sight when his
partner returned, because he had his suspicions that whatever Itachi was up to,
it would involve someone being in pain when the Uchiha showed.� He could read his partner well, it turned
out.

Weeks later, with whispers still going on behind his back �which he could hear, thankyouverymuch-
he knew that if this ever happened again, he�d have to give up his genius
title if he didn�t hide the evidence
of his rendezvous before returning.

-

Naruto mostly just had to suffer Neji�s
obvious enjoyment at his expense.�
Between the Hyuuga�s well-timed hints to
fluster Naruto in front of others and outright blackmail, Uzumaki Naruto knew
that sooner or later (sooner) he was going to have to kick Neji�s
ass.

He did have to admit though, Hyuuga Neji took the knowledge of the situation very well.� Of course, each time Naruto drank and Neji
was around, the dark haired man would hint that Naruto was waiting for someone,
or just smirk stupidly at him all night, doing his best not to laugh.

Somehow, Neji usually ended up with a black eye whenever
Naruto went drinking.

-

-

A/N: I wanted to have this
out by the end of July.
I'm not so
sure I like this as much as the first part, but I am sick of working on it, so
whatever. It's done now. The end.
Also, Kiba, Ino, Lee, and Naruto is my Dream
Team. Someday I want to write a fic about it.
Hopefully, this corrupted
even more people now. It's all about the corruption. And
reviews. It's also about reviews.
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