Break to Breathe | By : Okami-Rayne Category: Naruto > Yaoi - Male/Male > Shikamaru/Neji Views: 1958 -:- Recommendations : 2 -:- Currently Reading : 2 |
Disclaimer: NARUTO and its respective characters were created and are owned by Masashi Kishimoto. No copyright infringement intended. I make no money from this story. |
BREAK TO BREATHE
by Okami Rayne
Chapter Eighteen
Shit. Shit. Shit.
Shikamaru slowed his pace, aiming to diverge from Kiba's path without appearing obvious. He pretended to stretch out a crick in his neck as he waited for Kiba to near the tent he was sharing with Lee. "Catch ya later," Kiba grinned, tugging the tent flap back. Trying to appear relaxed, Shikamaru offered a half-assed wave to the other Chūnin, waiting until Akamaru followed the Inuzuka. The moment the white tail vanished and the canvas flap rustled shut, Shikamaru turned sharply and ducked into the tent he was sharing with Neji. He didn't need time to adjust to the dimmer light. Neji's wheezing breaths drew his gaze straight to the Hyūga. In the darkness he could just about make out the other ninja's form. Neji had pulled himself up to sit, doubled over slightly. Shikamaru frowned, raising his voice enough to carry over the increasingly agitated breaths. "Neji," he said softly. No reply. Shikamaru searched the obscured form in the darkness. As his eyes adjusted, they softened from their squint the moment he took in the faint tremble along the Hyūga's rigid frame. Neji's fingers were gnarled into any anchor available; one hand gripped the sheets, twisting them like a white chain around his wrist while the other hand fisted the pale fold of his robe. Shikamaru couldn't make out his face, curtained behind the fall of his hair, but the Nara could guess his expression...wrought with pain. Dammit, Neji… While Neji hadn't catapulted into panic, a wet, bloody rattle hacked up his breathing. This is only going to get worse… Shikamaru stood stiffly, shuttered eyes settled on the Hyūga, his own fingers curled into loose fists in his pockets as he shook his head once, fighting back the urge to move. This was always volatile territory. But each strained second tore a little more of his reluctance away, leaving a pit in his stomach that grew colder with concern after every hoarse rasp and shudder from the Jōnin. Shikamaru drew a breath. Then he moved. He closed the distance in three quiet steps and crouched down beside the other ninja, his motions slow and as unobtrusive as he could manage given the situation. Neji didn't appear to register his presence, or if he had, the Hyūga chose to ignore him. Shikamaru assumed it to be the latter. He pursed his lips, considering the wisdom in playing it safe. Hn…Why start now? So he acted, damn the consequences. Draping one arm across his thigh, the shadow-nin reached out with his free hand, letting it hover in the briefest hesitation before he gently set it down upon a shaking shoulder. Neji's fingers tightened in the sheets. The rustle of fabric drew Shikamaru's gaze down before it swept back up along Neji's arm to where his hand rested on the Hyūga's shoulder. He squeezed lightly, brushing his thumb against a sharp collarbone. The bold touch caused Neji to straighten up; Shikamaru felt the tension tightening the muscle beneath his hand. Better take this slow. He gently tapped his thumb against Neji's collarbone, mimicking a steady heartbeat. Neji remained tense, trying to still his breathing. But he didn't lash out. Shikamaru watched him closely, wondering if this tolerance communicated a tentative trust. Though less extreme than their last confrontation, it was just as precarious. The stability between them was as fragile as Neji's breath, likely to snap or cave under the slightest pressure. Despite this, Shikamaru took a chance. He slowly slipped his touch higher, sliding his fingers beneath the fall of the dark hair to gently knead Neji's nape. The Hyūga remained rigid, his body trembling with a combination of pain and tension, a dangerous mix likely to prove reactive. Come on, Hyūga… Shikamaru kept his focus honed on the Jōnin, searching for the slightest shift or response, despite the lazy half-mast of his gaze. He continued the easy press of his fingers, working them slowly and calmly along Neji's nape. He said nothing and offered only this light, soothing touch, which translated one word without a sound. Relax… Over and over he let the message play along his fingers, rubbing the Hyūga's nape, working against the tension that pressed back against his touch. He kept a small part of himself braced, ready for the jerk and snap of Neji's elbow, or the angry hiss and twist of the strained body. Normally, that's how things would have played out. So when Neji's ragged breaths pulled into a steadier rhythm, Shikamaru was fully prepared for a violent reaction. What he didn't expect was for Neji to bow his head slightly, releasing a slow, shaky breath as he relaxed a little. With the Hyūga's face still veiled behind the fall of his hair, it was impossible to gauge his expression, which might have helped indicate his mood. After a painfully tense moment, he watched Neji raise a hand to his mouth, following the movements quietly. The Hyūga stayed this way for a few seconds. When he lowered his hand again, the back of his wrist was wet with blood. Shikamaru's eyes pinched. "Neji…" "How is…your head…?" Neji croaked out. Shikamaru released a slow breath through his nose, trying not to push his luck. "Functioning normally," Shikamaru said, shrugging. "That's what matters." Neji turned his head a little, shifting the sharp shard of his bangs to expose a high ridge of cheekbone and the smooth slant of his jaw. Shikamaru caught a glimpse of pale iris observing him. He returned the gaze, stilling his fingers briefly before continuing the easy massage. Relax. Neji's eyes fluttered shut, betraying his reaction to the touch before he seemed to catch himself, reaching his hand back under the fall of his hair to gently grasp Shikamaru's wrist, stopping the press of the shadow-nin's fingers. "We need to…" Neji paused to ease his breathing. "We need to work on that strategy…" "I know." Shikamaru relaxed his trapped hand, watching calmly. Neji didn't release him. For a moment they stayed this way; the Hyūga's fingers curled loosely around Shikamaru's wrist while the Nara's fingers rested lightly at the Jōnin's nape. Of all the things that should have settled or sparked off between them in that moment, an easy silence wasn't one of them. So when they remained ensconced in this unexpected calm, Shikamaru briefly wondered whether his head was functioning normally – or Neji's, for that matter. This is either good, or going to get seriously bad… Shikamaru kept quiet, not wanting to disrupt this safe ground they'd somehow strayed onto, devoid of the usual landmines they both rigged unconsciously when around each other. It was steadier, calmer. He wasn't sure how long they stayed that way, but it must have been a while, because he registered that his legs were tightening from holding his crouch. Despite this, he made no move to shift, not wanting to break the rare spell of calm. Then it happened. Neji's thumb brushed along the skin of his wrist, tracing a soft touch along the veins. It drew an instant tickle of warmth along Shikamaru's forearm, sparking off tiny bursts of static in his blood. His fingers curled instinctively, brushing Neji's nape. He heard the Hyūga's breath fray slightly; so soft he almost missed it. Almost. Embers of heat stirred between them. Shit…and we're barely touching this time… As if sensing the fire they were playing with, Shikamaru straightened his fingers out just as Neji's grip squeezed lightly around his wrist, tugging his hand away. Their fingers grazed, then both of them leaned away from each other, Neji slanting one way as Shikamaru scooted back to sit in the crumpled nest of his own bedroll. Silence stood thickly between them, cooling the air again. Neither spoke as Shikamaru leaned back onto his palms and Neji combed his fingers back through the mocha strands framing his face. Thankfully, the easy quiet settled once more, like a thin veil of denial being pulled across the sparks that had almost flared. Dammit… Shikamaru closed his eyes, trying to chill the warmth still tingling along his arm. It was crazy, but undeniable. He could have convinced himself that he was a lot of things, but being ignorant to his own behaviour wasn't one of them. His attraction to Neji was bypassing dangerous now. Every time this heat gripped them the claws sank in a little deeper…ripped away a little more control. From just a brush against his wrist, he'd felt it flare up again, stronger this time. He knew, right then, that the last time they'd caved in to the unexplainable hunger, it had only been a taste of something potentially consuming. Shikamaru's eyes slipped open, settling on Neji again. He knew – viscerally knew – that the heated night at his home was just a lick of desire compared to whatever the hell would sink its teeth into them if they ever touched like that again. Shit…that can't happen again… He snapped his eyes shut, rubbing at the closed lids as if to impress the vision of dancing spots rather than strobe-like flashes of that night… He shook his head against the memories, trying to pull back his priority and objective from the murky depths it was slipping into. I made a deal, that's all that matters…this 'can't' get personal… Shikamaru dropped his hand sharply when he realised his name was being called. He shifted his gaze across to the moonstone eyes watching him and just about discerned Neji's expression in the gloom. The Hyūga arched a brow, his lip quirking weakly. "When you're back from orbiting your planet, Shikamaru, we have a strategy to plan." Shikamaru sensed the easy humour in Neji's normally serene but stoic tones and recognised what Neji was doing instantly; offering him a way out. He took it, immediately, using the opportunity to launch into a humorous but tactical repartee. Safer ground… He cocked his head and offered a lazy smirk. "It better involve a trade of players, Hyūga." Neji's lips curved slowly. "Not likely, Nara." "I'm serious. Naruto and Lee are gonna do some serious damage to the delicate state my head is in after your little…" Shikamaru jerked his head sharply to mimic a head-butt. Neji passed a hand across his mouth to smooth out his smile, humming. "I suppose I could trade you Chōji for Lee." "Sakura." Neji shook his head. "I don't think so." "She's better on backup offensive than recon, Neji." "So is Lee." "Yeah," Shikamaru snorted. "But Sakura's less likely to walk on her hands and drive me insane." "That's weak, Nara." Neji was fighting a chuckle now. Shikamaru shrugged, knowing that Neji wasn't about to compromise, though that didn't mean he wouldn't look for a way to sow the seed. Ultimately, he needed the pink-haired kunoichi. She was a necessity in his plan. Or at least she had been, before it had been turned on its head. "Better to have a taijutsu fighter like Lee upfront and a medic-nin like Sakura stationed in backup." Neji hummed. "A fair point under normal circumstances, but Sakura is more than an adequate fighter, with the benefit of ninjutsu. Not to mention Kiba and Chōji. I'm quite satisfied with the balance of teams." Shikamaru rolled his eyes, leaning back on his elbows. "Balance? Did I mention the handstand walking?" "Just wait until he attempts to carry you, against your will, for 'training' purposes." Shikamaru shook his head, smirking. "You're a troublesome bastard, Hyūga." Neji arched a brow, amusement playing across his eyes. "So you keep saying." Shikamaru pursed his lips, tipping his head back to stare at the roof of the tent as it began to lighten, corresponding to the lighter mood between them, despite the lack of compromise on Neji's part. He knew there was no way in hell Neji would allow for a team switch now – the Hyūga had his pieces exactly where he wanted them and despite the disruption to Shikamaru's original plan, the shadow-nin had already begun to work with the new hand he'd been dealt. It's a drag…but it's the only damn option… Which meant that getting angry over the situation was a waste of precious energy, not to mention too troublesome when he was this tired. Besides, the banter playing out between him and Neji right now held a different purpose. A rare opportunity that Shikamaru wasn't willing to let slide, for a reason he didn't want to give his attention to. He couldn't. It's not personal… Staring up at the tent, Shikamaru hummed. "You know, you could always use Naruto's shadow-clones for—" "—You did not just suggest Naruto for recon, Shikamaru." "Gag him and you'll have no problem." "Getting one to be quiet is difficult enough, if not impossible…let alone clones." Shikamaru dropped his gaze without lowering his head, glancing through his lashes at Neji with a wry smirk. "Is the formidable Hyūga scared of Konoha's knucklehead?" "When said 'knucklehead' becomes plural, I have cause to be uneasy, not scared." Neji shook his head. "Besides, he never follows orders." "Yeah, but he doesn't go down easy. I don't think anyone's more resilient." Neji inclined his head. "I cannot deny his strength, which is all the more reason to keep him as backup." "Sakura packs a punch. Backup could use her." "No." "You're a pain, Hyūga…" Shikamaru drawled, but his eyes flickered with laughter. "You know that Sakura snores?" Neji smirked. "Even if I believed you, it would be all the more reason for me to keep her. We wouldn't want her to disturb your narcoleptic naps." "And she hits like Ino…probably harder if Naruto's bruises are anything to go by." Neji shook his head with an amused press of his lips. Shikamaru arched a brow. "She's troublesome?" "Sorry, Shikamaru, but I will give Sakura a chance to outshine Lee this time." "Outshine? Not gonna happen. They're unevenly matched." "Oh?" Neji blinked. "And why's that?" Shikamaru's deadpan expression matched his voice. "…She doesn't 'burn with the flame of eternal youth'." It was worth uttering the ridiculous quote, just to hear Neji laugh.Two hours later, the teams were set to part ways.
The fractured light of dawn slotted through the trees, illuminating the campsite in a misty beige. All traces of shinobi presence had been removed. As the teams finished mobilising, Shikamaru watched Naruto heft the ridiculously heavy backpack that Chōji had originally carried, muttering under his breath about pack-horses having it easier. "Suck it up," Kiba teased, grinning. "Why do we have'ta carry your crap too?" Naruto scowled, shrugging against the weight of the added sleeping rolls and tent canvases with a growl. "See it as an opportunity to train…" Shikamaru muttered, his sleepy eyes shifting over to Lee. "Right Lee?" "Any challenge is an opportunity, Naruto!" Lee chimed, way too energetic given the hour. "It is invigorating!" Shikamaru shook his head, watching as the bushy-browed ninja eagerly strapped twice the weight of equipment onto his back, adjusting the hip belt and offering a thumb's up. Naruto scowled, muttering incessantly as he shifted his weight between each foot, trying to compensate for the added cargo. Hinata looked on with quiet concern, offering to carry what she could while trying to get Kiba to stop teasing the Uzumaki. Shikamaru yawned and shouldered his own pack, retaining his idle lean against a tree. He tracked his gaze across to Neji, watching him through shuttered eyes. The Hyūga was crouched a short distance away, speaking with Chōji and Sakura, his head bowed and attention focused on the map spread out on the ground. Shikamaru watched the Jōnin trace a finger along the Byakugan-charted territory, circling at the point where he and Shikamaru had agreed the teams would touch base. They'd rendezvous after the recon team had assessed threat levels at a distance and scoured the periphery of the village for Tsubasa rebels. Judging from Neji's mission with TenTen and Lee two months back, there was obvious division within the Tsubasa clan. Finding allies behind enemy lines was an advantage in this situation, where the relations between Hanegakure and Konoha had become so damned murky. And now, potentially hostile… Gauging the threat and gathering intelligence on allies; this was the entry phase. Next would come the objective and, if necessary, the need to either send in an envoy on behalf of the Hidden Leaf…or mount an offensive and eliminate the threat. Hopefully it won't come to that… "Man, hurry it up already! I'm gonna get cramp!" Naruto called over, earning himself a glare from Sakura. Shikamaru shook his head. "Settle down." It wasn't necessary; Neji was already rolling up the map, Chōji and Sakura both moving to retrieve their packs. Shikamaru made to shift away from the tree, but paused with a faint frown as he watched Neji straighten up with a wince. The Hyūga touched a hand to his chest, before slipping his fingers to the strap of his black-and-tan bag, making it appear as if he were adjusting the strap. It was a subtle movement, but Shikamaru didn't miss it. Time's running out… Instantly, his mind played over his ulterior objective, Tsunade's words running a warning commentary above the churn of his own thoughts. "We have a deal. Make it happen, Nara…because time is going to force my hand. If you don't fix this, I have no choice but to bring in a Hyūga who can." Shikamaru released a breath he didn't realise he'd been holding. He quickly resurrected his drowsy expression when Neji stepped towards him, handing over a radio transmitter. "Tried and tested, so to speak," Neji said quietly. "We have a priority channel, should you need to contact me without interrupting the other feeds. I will give you a situation report as soon as we've completed the entry phase. Then we'll confirm our meeting point, just in case plans change." "Got it," Shikamaru nodded, slipping the radio into a pocket of his flak jacket. "We'll be advancing at the rate we agreed. The added cargo should help keep Naruto from rushing ahead." "As agreed," Neji said, lip curving faintly as he glanced across at the still grumbling Uzumaki. Shikamaru didn't follow his gaze and instead dropped his eyes to Neji's chest. When he looked back up, Neji was watching him. They exchanged a quiet glance, a subtle tilt of the Nara's head prompting a slow blink from the other ninja. A question posed and an answer given without a word. No, Neji, you're not fine… Shikamaru wanted to verbalise this reply, but he didn't. The Hyūga must have sensed his unease because Neji shook his head, looking away before glancing back. Time to go. Shikamaru held the pale gaze for beat longer then shifted away from the tree. Their silent communication went unnoticed. Even when the teams finally parted, no one but Hinata noticed the way that Neji glanced strangely at Shikamaru's forehead… …Or the way that Shikamaru's brow furrowed a little as he watched Neji walk away.
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