Adult-FanFiction.org : Naruto

Stranger than the Wild	By : kiddattwell Category: Naruto > Threesomes/Moresomes Views: 30155 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 1
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto and I don't make any money off of it.

Chapter List
- 12
- 13
- 14
Chapter 13

----Sakura

Sakura paced Ino’s apartment as she thought out all of the options available to her and systematically rejected them.

When she got off work and Naruto wasn’t home yet, she was a little curious. When she arrived at the academy to find that he had already left, she rolled her eyes. When she went back to Ino’s and he still hadn’t arrived, she was concerned. When she peeked around the training grounds before circling back to Ino’s, she was more concerned. When she asked Iruka-sensei if he’d seen Naruto leave and he said yes, but didn’t know where he was going, her stomach dropped. Because if Naruto wasn’t with Sakura and he wasn’t with Iruka-sensei and he wasn’t training, there was really only one place he could be.

Now it was nine o’clock and for all she knew, Naruto and Sasuke had knocked each other out and were lying in a puddle of blood in the middle of Sasuke’s living room. Despite that gruesome mental image, she could only bring herself to peek at Sasuke’s place from a distance, and that had been hours ago. The house had been completely dark though, and totally devoid of the sounds of crying or screaming or explosions.

As she paced, she thought that perhaps Kakashi-sensei had caught up to Naruto before he had spoken to her and had advised him to make up with their dark haired teammate.

Sakura had been hyping herself for a serious talk with Naruto since her lunch with Kakashi, but now she felt like the wind had been taken from her sails. If Naruto was already talking to Sasuke… had she missed her chance to make things right in her own way?

You would know if you just went over there and took a closer look in the windows, she chided herself, I mean, you are a ninja.

Though that was true, she didn’t really want the risk of being caught by Sasuke if he happened to wander home at the wrong time. She had only gone over there the first time because she had just forced herself into a pep talk where she promised to be strong, but she found the most she could do was circle the place as she ambled away from the house and into the back field that had started the whole mess they were in now.

If only I had told Sasuke what I wanted right then… If only I had been ready.

But it was unrealistic to think she could have rejected him that night. His face, his eyes… they were so beautiful. He had been so open and mature… like the guy she had dreamed of him becoming.

She hadn’t let herself think those thoughts consciously, not at the time. But now they were rushing back to her. Sasuke had seemed like a real person that night, a man. And the power of it was devastating.

But that was over now and what troubled her wasn’t the loss of that dream boy, but the loss of his smiling face. She and Naruto had both longed to see him happy for so long and she only got to witness it for a brief moment…

Sakura took a deep breath and brought her focus back to the matter at hand. If Naruto wasn’t at Sasuke’s and in fact, no one seemed to be at Sasuke’s, then maybe they went somewhere else… together. Hell, maybe the boys had teamed up to pummel Kakashi-sensei after he tried to play counselor to them.

But she could only walk around town searching for so long. Soon, she was back at Ino’s, it was midnight, and the only place she thought there was left to look was perhaps Kakashi-sensei’s apartment.

Sakura did not want to admit that she had lost track of Naruto on the heels of their last conversation. But she really wished Ino was home or even Shikamaru or Chouji… someone who gave good advice. Because she was officially out of ideas.

---Naruto

Naruto woke up in the pitch black, fully awake. He knew exactly where he was and why that was a bad thing: Sakura. He had fallen asleep and kept her waiting.

But at the same time, he was presented with a dilemma. Sasuke was asleep, and the guy was the lightest sleeper in the world. Not only that, but Naruto had entangled their legs together somehow, so even the slightest move would jostle him awake. That normally wouldn’t be a problem, but he had seemed so weak before he’d gotten into bed that Naruto didn’t want to wake him.

So he sat for a while in the dark as shapes appeared before his eyes. It was absolutely silent outside and he wondered how late it was. Sasuke, too, was hardly making any sound; he had to strain to even hear him breathing. After sharing Sakura’s bed for the first time the night before, he couldn’t help but compare the two experiences.

Only to find there was a surprising lack of difference. Sasuke didn’t smell like her, of course, but his scent was familiar, as Sakura’s had been. Sasuke was getting a little broader now, and he was easily a different shape than Sakura under the blankets.

They had all grown, but when he closed his eyes, he still imagined them as the same age they were when they first became a team. Although that was dumb, he thought, since there was no way a couple of kids could have survived the things they had all been through. Not to mention, he had held Sakura’s body just the night before and it was in no way the body of a child. And Sasuke’s shoulders, so much broader than the ones in his imagination, were right in front of him.

But those faces were the ones burned behind his eyelids. He wasn’t sure if he could ever look at them without seeing who they used to be as well.

Naruto glanced over in the dark again. Sasuke was so close... and just that nearness made something loosen in his chest that he didn’t know was tight.

He had spent so long chasing him, so many nights wondering how he was, if the Sasuke he knew was still there... Naruto felt his face grow hot and Sasuke’s profile grew blurry. Slowly, he rolled over and wiped his eyes, staring out the window instead.

He needed to go, he knew. Sakura was probably worried sick. But as happy as he was in Sakura’s bed, he knew where he was needed. If only he didn’t have to choose, he thought, and lamented the fact that they wouldn’t all be living together after all. Before they had all stayed with Sasuke, he hadn’t even known he’d wanted that, but to live a dream and then have it taken away before you could appreciate it...

But now, because Sasuke was angsting and Sakura-chan was... Sakura-ing, it wasn’t gonna happen. Sheesh. They were more upset about that kiss than he was. But the way he figured it, Sasuke belonged to Sakura as much as he belonged to Naruto. And vice versa. He would have gladly exchanged an occasional kiss between them if it meant having his two most important people with him under one roof.

Some time later, lost in his thoughts, he fell back asleep.

----Sakura

Standing on Kakashi-sensei’s step just didn’t feel right. It wasn’t because Sakura and Naruto usually just used the window, trying to surprise their sensei in the same way he so often did to them. And it wasn’t because it was one in the morning and he was more than likely asleep. But it did have everything to do with their last encounter, only hours ago.

By rights, she should have just burst in and demanded if he had heard from Naruto and, if he had, what had they talked about that had made him go missing for the better part of eight hours. But she was finding more and more that she wasn’t mad at Kakashi for the things that he said. And that she had, perhaps, overreacted when his heart was in the right place. And maybe, and this was a big maybe, she had twisted his words, which had been about Naruto and Sasuke, to be about her own hang-ups. And that was just embarrassing.

Standing on her former sensei’s step, feeling like a complete fool, she cursed Naruto. If he hadn’t run off to God knows where, she wouldn’t have had to turn to Kakashi-sensei for clues to find him, and in turn, think about her last conversation with him so much… and find out that she was in the wrong.

With jittery hands and a curse under her breath, she pushed his buzzer, trying hard not to squirm with the embarrassment of it all. She counted forty-five seconds before she heard the latch turn.

“Sakura…” he said, his voice rough with sleep and clearly not trying to hide his surprise.

Kakashi was in what probably passed as pajamas; a blue, long sleeved shirt and loose pants. His mask was on, but his feet were bare and his headband was missing, letting his brush-broom of hair wilt to the side slightly more than usual. There were lots of times when Kakashi-sensei had been dressed casually- heck, on a few occasions in the hospital, she had seen him practically naked. But during none of those times had he ever been anything but the legendary Kakashi-sensei. Wise, strong, and full of answers.

What the hell was I thinking, going off on him like that? She berated herself as she tried to meet his eye.

“Do you want to come in?” he asked, calm, but with unspoken confusion in his voice.

He’s shocked that I’m daring to show my face to him! She thought anxiously, but nodded.

He held open the door and she walked inside, her head drooped. She had practiced this; she had thought about this moment for almost an hour before she committed to coming over to his house for help. But standing in the dim light of his entryway, knowing she would have to look in his eyes after all the things she said to him still made her stomach quiver unpleasantly. She turned to him quickly while he was still closing the door.

“Sensei, I... I’m sorry. Your words before, on the roof... I know I twisted them. You were trying to tell me you were worried about the boys and I made it all about me,” she said, clutching her hands together.

“That’s part of the problem though, isn’t it? It’s never about you.”

Sakura felt the breath catch in her chest. To hear him state something so true and simple struck her to the core.

It took her a moment to recover, but she tried to play it off, “I know I said something like that before, but that’s my own problem. It’s not your fa-“

Kakashi cut off her speech with a wave of his hand.

“It might be because I was raised by a man and then alone, but I’m not great at handling emotions. Or rather, it’s hard for me, so it’s something I’d rather not do... My only friends over the years have been my colleagues who have grown close to me because of proximity and time... Although, I’m still pretty good at reading faces,” he said pointedly and Sakura realized her expression was somewhere between mouth-hanging-open shock and tragedy. She tried to smooth it out as he continued.

“I was always worried about taking on a team because that usually means taking a young girl into your care, and you hear about how girls at that age can be. I wasn’t sure if I was ready. But actually, you were easier to handle than I thought,” he said, his cheek rising to indicate a smile under the mask, “Definitely emotional, but you deferred to me in everything, followed direction better, had the most good sense and were generally more balanced than either of the boys.

“I never stopped to consider it, but I guess I relate to dysfunction better. I got wrapped up in Sasuke because he was angry and reminded me of myself. And by the time I got around to teaching you and Naruto anything, you had found a much better sensei than me,” He said, a smile behind his mask, although now it seemed far from genuine.

“But that doesn’t excuse what happened between us. I left you alone when there was a lot of stuff going on and you needed me. While your teammates got my full attention at the drop of a hat, you didn’t and never did. And I treated you like... well, like the reliable one. I knew you’d be ok, so I didn’t go out of my way to make sure.

“Maybe I really wasn’t ready for a girl. Maybe I was scared of it... or something like that. Or I wasn’t mature enough. Because you put on a good show of not needing me and I fell for it. Anyway, I don’t want to bore you with all that when you came here for something else, but... I wanted to say I’m sorry. It’s way too late for me to be your sensei. But if you’d let me, I’d like to try to be your friend.”

Sakura dove into his chest, her shaking arms weaving around his torso, clutching the blue material covering his back. He stumbled with a small “uff” and caught himself against the door frame.

“I thought you were gonna punch me. My life flashed before my eyes,” he said with faux surprise before letting his arms settle over her shoulders.

“Sensei...” Sakura sniffed. So much had happened in such a short amount of time. Things she couldn’t tell her parents or her Shishou. And while Ino was great, sometimes she felt too close to everything, too invested. Too much like herself.

“Maybe you could call me Kakashi, Sakura,” he said, and squirmed a bit in her embrace.

“It wouldn’t be weird?” She asked, releasing her hold of him.

He shook his head, “It’s weirder for you to call me sensei, honestly. So, now that we’ve got that out of the way, what brings you over so late? I doubt it was just to apologize.”

Sakura nodded and Kakashi lead her to his sofa. It was new, of course, and looking at his apartment, empty and sterile, when it was once filled comfortably with junk, was a melancholy sight to behold. She sat down, thinking of his mushy old blue couch, and he sat beside her.

“I... thought you might have seen Naruto? Maybe talked to him sometime today?”

Kakashi shook his head negative, “Why?”

“I was supposed to meet him tonight and he never showed up. And, well, at the moment, he doesn’t exactly have anywhere to stay except for with me at Ino’s or with Iruka-sensei and I already checked over there, so...”

“Did you check at Sasuke’s?” He asked, rubbing his scarred eye absently.

“I did, but it was all dark in there. I’m not even sure if Sasuke’s home.”

Kakashi furrowed his brow, “He should be by now. I’ve been keeping track of him. Could they have gone off somewhere together?”

Sakura bit her lip. Kakashi leaned toward her, “I know they were fighting, but could they be making up?”

“That’s what you wanted to know when you came by earlier… But…” Sakura paused, embarrassed, “How much do you actually know about all this?”

“Because of what you told me, I’ve got a much clearer image. I’ve been expecting a bit of a breakdown from Sasuke for a while, so I’ve been watching for signs. And of course, now that I know that he kissed you, I’ve figured out a bit of the time line of events. I assume it was after the kiss that you and Naruto left his house and you all stopped speaking to each other for a few days. Then, of course, that the two of you… er, made up,” Kakashi said, and Sakura had to turn away from his gaze.

“You’ve really figured it out,” Sakura said with a forced laugh.

“There are still a few confusing details… I hate to cash in on my offer of friendship so quickly, but... maybe you could fill me in on what’s really going on between you three?”

Sakura took a deep breath. How much should she tell him, she wondered. He had offered the olive branch and even asked for a second chance at getting to know her... but the idea of telling him important stuff like that was a little scary now that she was in the moment. She never realized how much power he had to hurt her or even how hurt she felt by his neglect over the years. She had never stopped to think about it before, but... now that she realized that fact, how much more would it hurt if he messed up this time?

“On second thought, it might be too soon,” he said, his eye turned up in the corner, like he was smiling, “But I think I can help you find Naruto.”

“No, wait... I trust you, sen- Kakashi. I always have,” she added, and placed her hand over his gently before curling herself more securely into the cushions, “I’ll tell you all of it.”

She did, in his quiet living room as he listened without expression. She didn’t know how far back to start- the mission to the sand? Her early decision not to fall for Sasuke again? She had never tried to explain it all at once before. As she spoke, she realized that Kakashi might be the only other person outside of Sasuke and Naruto who really understood the complexity of their triangular relationship. And that maybe... he’d even get the part that no one else seemed to get; why she and Naruto couldn’t just leave Sasuke alone, why their bond was so important.

But by the end of her tale, she couldn’t help but struggle for excuses, trying to assign emotional reasoning to her illogical feelings, “I know it... it doesn’t make sense,” she finally concluded. “I don’t know why we can’t all move on. When I say it all out loud like this it sounds like I just refuse to let go...”

“If you could let go, you would have before,” Kakashi said, staring down the dark corridor in front of him, “We don’t know what the future holds. You’re all still very young and maybe one day you’ll be able to release each other. But I don’t think your connection to Naruto and Sasuke is a bad thing. In fact, I’m glad you’ve realized how important it is. You all just have to be honest with each other so it’s a positive force in your lives instead of a negative.” He ran his hand over his mask before he turned his scarred profile toward her.

“Do you think you or Naruto would want to be in a relationship where you both have to pretend that one of the most important things in your lives doesn’t matter?”

Sakura shook her head, “I know that would be bad, but… I feel like there’s no good way to deal with it. I mean, it took a lot of convincing to make Naruto believe that I wasn’t just settling for him in the first place...” Sakura paused, running her hands through her hair, vaguely ashamed of what she was thinking. But Kakashi stared patiently down at her, and she quickly blurted, “When I’m being completely honest, I can admit I love them both. I chose for Naruto to be my partner because... because I do love him and he’s always been there and he’s just... generally better at being human, I guess, and he just plain deserves it at this point. But that doesn’t seem right... I mean... you should love one person the most and have that be the reason why you’re with them. And I don’t think that kind of honesty is something a boyfriend would want to hear either.”

Kakashi made a low hum, but then said, “I think it’s ok... Because your boyfriend is Naruto and he loves the same person as you. I think he’d understand why you still love Sasuke and how it doesn’t diminish your love for him. For better or for worse, neither of you can leave the guy alone. Me neither, I guess,” Kakashi said, his hidden smile broadening again, “I think you should all sit down and speak openly about it.” Kakashi stretched suddenly and stood up, “On that note, let’s go search for those two. Because I guarantee that they’re together. Which further proves my point: After things were settled with you, Naruto couldn’t even hold out a day without checking on Sasuke. You’re not the only one whose fretting over that annoying guy all the time.”

Sakura nodded. What Kakashi was telling her was true, but not easy. He offered her his hand, casually pulling her to her feet as he scratched the back of his head with his other hand.

“So... let’s start at the new Uchiha manor.”

“I checked there not too long ago... right after dark,” Sakura sighed.

“But I bet you kept your distance. Let’s take a really good look together, ne?” He said in an upbeat, teacherly tone.

“Alright,” she assented.

---- ---- ----

Sasuke’s house was as dark as it had appeared the last time Sakura checked it. However, where Sakura kept her distance, Kakashi continued, disappearing into the shadows along the sides of his house where Sasuke was planning a garden wall to enclose the yard.

Sakura was glad he hadn’t begun building it yet. It would have felt even more wrong to have to scale a wall in order to sneak around.

Kakashi was quick to check windows and move on. He was silently scaling to the second floor before Sakura even tried to pull her weight, delicately peeking into the living room window to no results. She quietly leapt to the roof, near the spot she had been playfully chasing Sasuke on the fateful night.

Kakashi was rounding the other side of the ledge, shaking his head to tell her there had been no sightings as she approached the last window, the one that looked into Sasuke’s bedroom.

They approached it from opposite sides, Kakashi taking a knee and Sakura mirroring him as they peeked through the glass.

It was almost in complete darkness. Though her eyes had completely adjusted, the shadow inside the house was thick. Sakura could barely make out the shape of the mattress on the floor...

She glanced at Kakashi, whose sharingan was open. Did that make his night vision better? She had no idea. His brow was furrowed. Dipping back out of sight, Sakura gave a light pull to the fabric at his elbow. His eye closed with a snap and gave her the signal to quietly retreat.

Sakura leapt to the opposite side of the house as Kakashi, meeting him on the street where he was already waiting.

“Let’s walk,” he said lowly.

“What is it? Did you see them?”

“Yeah, they’re there. Looks like they fell asleep,” he said, his quick paced stride not faltering, “That’s a relief.”

“Sensei- er, Kakashi, slow down a second. Why does it feel like we’re in full scale retreat mode?”

“Does it? Sorry. I was just thinking about what to do now,” he said, slowing his stride until she was able to comfortably keep up.

“Yeah... I’m not sure myself. I guess they talked themselves into a coma. Or fought themselves into one... They’ve probably managed to clear up any awkwardness between them anyhow.”

“But that doesn’t resolve anything for you,” Kakashi hemmed, propping his elbow on her shoulder like an arm rest, making Sakura wobble to keep her balance, “There’s definitely an opportunity there, having them both in one place with their guard down. I know what I would do... But it would take a bit of boldness.”

“I can be bold,” Sakura said, her voice warm as she grinned at him.

He smiled in return, “I know. Let’s go back to my place. We can get something to eat while we talk.”

----Sasuke

Sasuke slowly blinked into the daylight after Naruto jostled the bed violently upon waking up. He watched, almost in an out of body experience, as the blonde stomped through his bedroom.

“Ahhhh…!” Naruto cried, throwing his plain brown clothing-drive jacket over his shoulders, “I was supposed to meet Sakura-chan… I wonder if she’s gonna be mad…” Naruto threw a pained look over his shoulder at him, but Sasuke didn’t have an answer. Knowing Sakura, he would assume the answer would be yes, but maybe things were different when you were dating.

I suppose I’ll never know, Sasuke thought, studying Naruto’s movement lazily.

He felt like he’d been put through the wringer so many times over the past couple weeks that he didn’t even want to think any more. The only thing he would be listening to would be his most primal wants and needs.

Luckily, what he wanted more than anything else was to lay in bed for another twenty-four hours.

Naruto was fully dressed now, and glancing around the room for anything he may have forgotten. When he couldn’t find anything, he turned to Sasuke, some of his frantic energy dimming a bit when he met his eyes.

“Can I come over later?” Naruto asked, “I’ll bring you dinner.”

“I’ll be here,” Sasuke said. He would eventually need to eat and delivery meant he could really commit to the stay in bed all day plan.

However, Naruto smiled so brilliantly, it caught him off guard. Some kind of emotion was trying to creep back in. He felt his face heat up and pressure build in his chest.

No, damn it. Just let me rest! Sasuke willed to his brain, Wasn’t yesterday enough? What more do you want from me?

“Speaking of food… do you smell something?” Naruto asked, breaking the moment to sniff the air.

Sasuke did not, but now that Naruto was still, he was fairly sure he heard something… an occasional clattering sound that he had attributed to Naruto’s morning scramble.

Unwillingly he rolled out of bed and followed Naruto down the hall until he turned the corner and suddenly bumped into his back. Whatever he saw in the kitchen had frozen him in his tracks. Sasuke peered around his shoulder to see what had caught him so off guard. His stomach tensed when he saw pink hair…

Sakura was at the stove. It looked like she was… cooking? The morning light cradled her gently, as though she was some sort of pastel-haired apparition. She was fully dressed in a cherry red shirt and skirt covered by a flouncy white apron. Her hair was tied up with a white ribbon and her skin and hair had a healthy glow… As though she was exactly where she belonged and had been there the whole time.

Sasuke was as confused and bewildered by the domestic scene as Naruto seemed to be. The feminine immaculacy that Sakura’s sudden appearance presented was confounding. Where the hell did she even get an apron when there was still a clothing scarcity, let alone one so frilly?

After a moment, Sakura took notice of the two bewildered boys and smiled at them, “I thought you guys must have worn yourselves out yesterday, so a healthy breakfast is in order.”

Naruto took a few cautious steps toward her, “Sakura-chan, I... I’m really sorry I didn’t tell you where I was. I didn’t mean to fall asleep...”

“It’s ok,” Sakura said, “I’m glad you guys could talk and that hopefully… things are ok now. I really am,” she said and she gave Naruto a look of pure warmth before turning back to her pans.

“I’m almost done in here. Let’s eat picnic style in the living room. Will you grab some plates, Sasuke-kun?” she asked, gesturing at a stack of plates that were sitting on the counter.

Sasuke did as she requested and took the plates into his empty living room. He almost expected there to be a table there, because he certainly hadn’t owned this many plates or cups before this morning either. Did Sakura raid a restaurant to pull this off? he wondered. More and more, the people in his life seemed to be capable of the completely unexpected.

As he and Naruto arranged things on the floor of the living room, Sasuke searched himself. A good night of sleep seemed to have washed away the worst of his feelings. He thought he might have felt something, seeing Naruto and Sakura exchanging loaded looks, but he was fine. More than fine. It was almost like he was back to normal again, in control of his emotions, but... lighter, somehow.

Although, he was a little confused by Sakura’s sudden appearance in his house. Not that he didn’t want her there… or did he? He honestly had no idea, but he found that as she brought the last remaining plate of food over, he couldn’t stop watching her. Her gentle expressions, her patience and apparent calm… and that damn apron!

There’s not enough wrong with me already? Now I lose my edge whenever my teammate shows up acting unexpectedly girly?

“While we eat, I thought we could talk about a few things as a team? Stuff that we’ve been avoiding,” Sakura said, setting a serving plate on the ground as Naruto scampered behind her awkwardly, splattering a cup of orange juice in his eagerness to claim his spot.

“And I want to apologize. To both of you”, Sakura said, looking up from the food to catch Sasuke’s eyes, “I shouldn’t have freaked out after we kissed. And Naruto, I shouldn’t have tried to hide what happened. I was cowardly, and I didn’t want any fights or jealousy or hurt feelings to come out of it...”

“I wasn’t jealous, though,” Naruto said quickly, settling down in front of his plate, “When I figured it out, the first thing I felt was lonely. It was like I was being cut out, you know? Losing my place on the team. I guess I was scared that... I wouldn’t matter as much if you two were together. That’s a pretty pathetic way of thinking...” Naruto said, his head lowered, “I’m sorry. I wondered, yesterday, if my reaction pressured you into choosing me or… or something like that, Sakura-chan.”

“I wasn’t pressured,” Sakura said, grabbing his hand and holding it from across the tableware, “I love you. I’m glad we’re together.”

Sasuke saw that Naruto was biting his lip, his jaw clenched. Before he realized it, he was speaking.

“I felt the same way,” Sasuke said. Immediately, blue and green eyes were staring at him over the spread. His voice caught for a moment, but he steeled himself to finish what he started, “I saw you two together. I knew you guys were… with each other… before that. Sakura told me that night when we… But I saw you guys running off somewhere together. I saw you kiss,” he said, trying to get ahold of his rambling, “And I wasn’t jealous either. I just didn’t know what my place would be if everything changed.”

Sakura nodded emphatically, releasing Naruto’s hand, “God, me too. I’ve been so nervous about this… I love both of you so much. I was so scared to make a choice because I didn’t want to lose either of you or change this,” she said, sweeping her hand at each other them, “I felt like everything was riding on me; if I didn’t do this just right I could lose the two most important people in my life. And it felt like, no matter what I did, I would be lying to one of you or to myself because I would still love whoever I didn’t pick.”

“Sakura, you could never lose me. I think I managed to say that much even before I had to go that night...” Naruto said, his voice husky.

“But... I’m afraid that you’ll think...” Sakura let out a breath and swept her hand through her bangs, “The truth is… I do love you both. I want to continue to be in... in your life, Sasuke. That talk we had that night... It made me so happy because I felt like you were really comfortable with me, almost like you are with Naruto... But at the same time, it felt disloyal to Naruto be so happy about that,” Sakura said, turning to face the blonde, “And I felt like if I told you any of that, you would think I didn’t love you for real.”

“I don’t feel that way at all! It’s hard to explain… I get why you would think that, because maybe that’s how a boyfriend should feel, but I’m happiest when we’re all happy. Sasuke too,” Naruto said, and Sasuke reluctantly met both of their eyes.

“I’m sorry, Sasuke,” Sakura said, casting her eyes down, “This has been so confusing for me. I’ve probably caused a lot of problems for you just because I was afraid of having this conversation...”

“You don’t have to keep apologizing,” Sasuke said, sounding sharper than he meant to. He softened his voice before he continued, “I don’t think I pick up on the subtleties of relationships. I never had any expectations of myself to feel one way or another about love. But I think I’m on the same page as you. I don’t care who’s with who. I don’t want us to lose our bond as a team.”

Naruto nodded vigorously at him, “Yeah! It’s like that! Like… I don’t care about labels and stuff either. We just have to trust each other and know we’re important to each other no matter what. I think,” Naruto said, staring at the food before him in deep concentration, “What I’m really trying to say is that… maybe normal dating stuff doesn’t matter because we’re really a team. It’s only natural that we all feel equally close to each other. To try and change that just to fit in with regular girlfriend boyfriend standards would be like… going down a rank,” Naruto said, his hand cupping his chin, before his expression turned pensive, “If it comes right down to it, I... I don’t want to be in a relationship that makes anyone else on the team feel bad,” Naruto said, looking pained. His eyes were all for Sakura now.

Sasuke knew he needed to speak up in that moment, but he wasn’t sure what to say. He didn’t want them to break up because of him; honestly, all that girlfriend boyfriend stuff seemed beyond him, considering the past week of mind-wrecking stress.

“I agree. I don’t want anyone to be unhappy,” Sakura finally said, barely above a whisper, “But... I don’t want this new part of our relationship to end either.”

The voice Sasuke had been trying to find finally made itself known, “Being a team doesn’t mean we don’t have our different dynamics,” he said slowly, “Are you jealous when Naruto and I insult each other? Or start grappling when we argue?”

Sakura smiled a little, “No... although it does annoy me, on occasion.”

“And I don’t get jealous when the two of you gang up on me and act all superior when I do something stupid!” Naruto offered helpfully, “I even like it! It’s nice seeing you guys on the same page. It’s even kinda cute, in a weird way. You guys looking at me all menacing and judge-y-“

“Dummy!” Sakura shouted, tossing his hand back at him.

“I was just agreeing with Sasuke’s point!”

“I think we’re all on the same page, for now,” Sasuke said, trying to break up the fight before they lost their thread. He took a deep breath as he tried to calm himself down as well. His heart was beating fast, but it was pleasant. Like the feeling of running at a full sprint down a hill before fatigue sets in. “I don’t think there’s anything wrong with the two of you continuing to see each other.”

“Yeah… We’re all ok. You won’t get jealous when I kiss him, and you won’t get jealous when I worry about him,” Sakura said, letting out another long sigh, “Ugh, it’s such a relief…”

“Yup,” Naruto chirped, grinning at her, “And you won’t get upset when I stay over at Sasuke’s? Or train with him while you’re at work?”

“Yup,” Sakura mimicked in a wry tone, then added, “But I do want us all to promise something,” Sakura said, meeting their eyes, “We have to be honest with each other about our feelings. I feel like that’s the only way we’re all going to stay sane. E-Especially you, Sasuke-kun. It’s hard to know when you’re upset or when you’re just being you and I don’t want things to fester. I don’t want things to ever be like this between all of us again.”

“I don’t want that either,” Sasuke agreed quietly.

“Me neither. Man, this week...” Naruto groaned with a sigh, then perked up again, “You know, you weren’t here for it, but Sasuke said he was gonna try harder with his stuff. And, uh...” Naruto looked to him, evidently at a loss for the exact words Sasuke had used. Sasuke took another deep breath.

“I acknowledge that I’m going through some things and I know that makes me... difficult. There have been some intense feelings that I don’t understand and that’s... troubling for me, since I like to be in control of myself.”

“Troubling… Scary, you mean,” Naruto said, not unkindly. Sasuke shrugged. Naruto turned to Sakura, “So I told him I was gonna work on reading him more and letting him have space if he needed it, since I guess I can be kinda clingy.”

Sakura smiled, “Ya think? You only spent the last half of a decade trailing him. You’re basically a stalker.”

“Mou! You too,” Naruto said, but then paused. It was clear he was deliberating whether or not to say something and Sasuke had an ominous feeling about what was about to come out of his mouth. Sure enough, the blonde was suddenly sporting a maximum wattage grin before he said, “Speaking of staying close! I was thinking about it last night and I really want us all to live together!”

Sasuke sat with those words for a moment, trying to digest them as he watched Sakura’s mouth drop open.

“Are... are you an idiot?! We were just talking about being too clingy and giving Sasuke space to sort out his emotions! Now you’re saying you want to do the opposite!”

“No, no, listen! It makes perfect sense! Think about how we worry over him, Sakura-chan. We won’t be able to tell if he needs us or not if we always have to say bye and go our separate ways at the end of the day. Plus, on a day like yesterday, when Sasuke needed me, you wouldn’t have to feel left out and I wouldn’t have had to choose between you two. Cause we’d be in the same house! And it would keep everyone equal, like we just said. It’s perfect!”

“Well... I mean, it’s perfect for us,” Sakura agreed, “But that’s because we spend so much time speculating about him and his emotional state. It just feeds into the whole clingy thing: living in the same house enables us to cling, but what about when Sasuke needs space?”

Sasuke was trying to listen because he knew the conversation was about him and possibly, his entire future. But he felt like he’d come down with a sudden fever. Had he needed Naruto yesterday, like he said? And did they really spend that much time wondering about him? Did he seem that fragile?

He wanted to interject, deny it, kick them out of the house for being so... so...

Stifling, an angry voice in his mind supplied.

But... he had needed Naruto. And he had just admitted to as much, to Sakura as well. And... as much as the hostile part of his mind riled at the realization, Naruto showing up last night was the first time in over a week that he had felt ok. And now, with both of them there this morning, his mind felt like it was his own again. Even with them arguing like a bunch of bratty genin right in front of him, he was able to think about things without his thoughts spiraling into an existential nightmare.

Do I need them? Really need them?

His fever was replaced with a cold sweat. The pleasant sensation of his heart beat became tighter, restrictive...

Naruto and Sakura were still arguing. If he could just focus on that instead of this feeling…

Naruto was gesturing at him, “We CAN give him plenty of space, even in one house! He’ll have his own room! And, the most important part of all of this, we’ll KNOW when he needs space because we’ll be here!”

“But see? That’s just coming back around to our feelings. Obsessing about his welfare is our issue.”

“But we could handle it BETTER if we knew we were close if he really needed us! We wouldn’t have to worry that he was just sitting around all messed up because his pride won’t let him come see us. He could just CASUALLY stroll into the living room and we’d be there for him!” The debate was beginning to escalate in volume. A flush had broken out of their faces as Sasuke tried to concentrate on what his teammates were saying.

“I... that’s true about us being more accessible…” Sakura faltered, before rallying herself again, “But I still think it’s giving us a pass on our issue, which you and I really need to learn to deal with. We have to trust Sasuke to come to us when he needs us. And we have to get control of our fear that something bad will happen if we leave him to his own devices.”

“But if he’s right there-“ Naruto shouted, flinging his arm at Sasuke, “We don’t have to...”

Sakura looked pained as Naruto’s face fell, “I know,” she said quietly, “I know.”

Naruto balled his fist and tossed his head angrily to the side, “Damn it, and we just said we had to be more honest,” he growled through clenched jaw. Then he looked straight at Sasuke.

“When I’m not around you, I’m scared. I’m scared that somethings gonna come up, like... in your head, and that I’m gonna lose you again.

“And it’s like Sakura said,” Naruto continued, “That’s my problem, not yours, but... I want to live with you. Both of you. For all the reasons I said and more. So it’s easier, so we’re close at hand and because I... I just really really want to! I want to see you guys every day! As much as I can!” Naruto shouted.

They sat quietly after that. Again, Sasuke felt drained, like he’d been wrung out and stretched on a line.

His mind was untrustworthy. He was beginning to see that. Joy and fear seemed entwined in an unnatural dance, even when seemingly good things were happening in his life. He had spent over a decade mastering his body to become the most powerful ninja he could imagine. Maybe it would take the same amount of time or longer to straighten out his warped mind.

He stood, turning away from their silent, tense eyes, to stand by the window facing the vacant field behind his house. After a long look around at the yard, he spoke.

“Sliding doors,” Sasuke said, pointing through the glass, “Instead of this window. Leading out to a traditional, wrap around breezeway, here. This space can be enclosed to form a courtyard and then, a few more tatami rooms with the bath over there.”

He heard the slapping of feet against the floor, but it was too late. Before he could turn around, he was tackled to the ground, barely able to break his fall with his one free arm. Luckily, Sakura and Naruto’s arms were there too, wrapped around him, digging into his spine as their weight pressed against him. He sighed.

If his mind wasn’t trustworthy, then he’d let instinct and fate do what they will.

--- --- ---

A/N: Ok, so I actually went back and read ALLLLL of this story before putting the finishing touches on this chapter. And man. There has been a lot of talking in these last few bits, with this one as the most dialogue heavy of all. We have been in a deep dive of emotions for a while here, but it seems like I’m finally going to be able to write some light hearted stuff now… And scenes with like, actual action besides sitting on a couch and yappin’ ‘bout feelins’, lol. Thank gerd! Onward towards the light, my friends, towards the light!
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Stranger than the Wild