Adult-FanFiction.org : Naruto

Sukea	By : MisatosPenPen Category: Naruto > Yaoi - Male/Male > Kakashi/Sasuke Views: 3315 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 10
- 11
- 12
This entire story has been exclusively from Kakashi’s perspective. But I felt the inspiration to write one from Sasuke’s covering his point of view throughout the story thus far.
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It was too early. Sasuke sat up. His gaze was fixed on the foot of the bed. He hated waking up. His mind worked, though it tended to wander despite his will. He figured that his emotion center might be still asleep too. Not that it was highly developed to begin with.
Sasuke turned his head, dragging his unmoving eyes to the man sleeping beside him. Kakashi was lying on his back with his head turned toward the wall. Even though he couldn’t emote or do anything but stare when he first woke up, inside, Sasuke’s heart swelled. He truly loved the older man. He was beautiful.
The light was growing brighter. He glared at the threadbare curtains for a moment. They were white and thin, letting in too much light. He bought them to add some decoration to the room. They were ineffectual. In fact, they seemed to intensify the light because they were sheer and white. Those were going in the trash.
They were like most of his furniture: reclamations.
When he was released from prison, he didn’t have anywhere to stay. He wasn’t allowed to leave the village, but they let him camp out in the training grounds. He didn’t have a bedroll or make a fire, he just sat against a tree. Luckily, it was a warm autumn. He just felt fortunate he was left alone.
He could have asked Naruto or Kakashi, but he didn’t think they had permanent homes yet either; half the village wasn’t built yet. There was a simply built building with free rooms open to all while the village was rebuilt. It was really just a large hostel with the plainest rooms. His pride stung, but there wasn’t any choice other than sleeping in the forest every night. In fact, it took him over a week to break down and get a room. At least there was a shower. It was communal, but there was a shower. He was the only one to use it at three in the morning. It mattered little when he slept since they didn’t reactivate him as a Konoha shinobi immediately.
He had little more than the clothes on his back and the sword on his belt. But whatever he did have he took with him whenever he left during the day. Even when he locked the door at night, he didn’t feel secure. Some nights, he still slept in the woods.
When that tall building near the western edge of the village was built, Sasuke started sleeping up there when his little room felt too cramped. He felt more secure up there anyway. Especially after his confinement, he’d rather feel free and unrestrained.
When this apartment building was built, it was the cheapest. He still slept up on that rooftop many nights. When he did sleep in his new studio, he just lay on his back and stared at the ceiling. No bed, no mattress. He kept all his clothes and weapons in his pouches and left them lying next to the wall. The kitchen came with a stove and refrigerator; otherwise, it was a completely empty room.
He finally went out to buy furniture. People wanted their personal effects but not their damaged furniture so much. There were battered bed frames, dressers, nightstands, and anything else one might want all for sell with the money going to the rebuilding effort. He bought one piece at a time and carried them back alone. The mattress was new but was made before the destruction. It had been wrapped in plastic but had been blown halfway to Suna in Pain’s attack. Even his dishes were a mixture of new but damaged and unclaimed and damaged. Wabi-sabi was an excellent excuse for the imperfections and chips. His dinner guest never seemed to notice. Then again, everyone’s dishes probably looked like this.
When he wanted to brighten the place up and impress Sukea, Sasuke had gone back to buy the dusty curtains, the cracked lamp, and two plants with cracked pots. He was able to hide the cracks by angling them to the wall. If anyone were to really look at any of his possessions, they would see the wear, the dents, the repairs, the cracks, and missing chunks. Sasuke may have come from a prominent noble clan, but none of that mattered to him. Until he first invited Sukea to his place he didn’t mind the damaged and secondhand items.
Sukea.
Sasuke didn’t want to cook that night, so he went to a restaurant. It made him feel just how alone he was to cook only for himself. He’d grown used to helping cook for Taka. It was depressing to put so much effort into something just for himself. He was given a booth at the front of the room, and he chose to face the door. It was easier to ignore the stares from his fellow patrons with his back to them. The position allowed him to witness a lanky man with curly, light brown hair with a green coat enter. Sasuke called out to him without really thinking. Which was very unlike him. To his delight, Sukea took the offered seat.
Sasuke found himself relaxing with the older man. It helped that Sukea was completely at ease with him. He was easy to talk to and had a level of maturity to match his own. Sasuke couldn’t deny Naruto as his best friend, but he couldn’t talk to Naruto the way he could with Sukea. Naruto didn’t see anything wrong with the way the world was changing. The two times Sasuke had brought up the subject, Naruto had been enthusiastic about it all. Sasuke had quickly shut up and let the subject drop. Sukea was weary of change too.
He finally made another friend.
It was when they had dinner at Ichiraku that Sasuke started falling in love with the older man. He’d already acknowledged that Sukea was attractive, but when Sukea said that it was important that Sasuke chose someone he loved and should be happy, Sasuke fell. No one else seemed to care for what he wanted. Sukea seemed to understand him and sympathize with him. Naruto wanted to save him, but he never truly understood him.
And he made him laugh. At their next meeting, they traded humorous stories. Sasuke never laughed when the events happened, but he laughed now while telling Sukea about them. He couldn’t remember the last time he laughed from something funny. He’d laughed manically when he faced off with Kakashi after Danzo’s death, but he hadn’t found anything funny since . . . When was the last time he laughed?
He invited Sukea to his apartment that night. He asked Sukea why he wasn’t married to ease into the subject of romance. When Sukea said he was handsome, Sasuke mentioned having male admirers. Sukea didn’t bat an eyelash at the idea. So, he pounced—almost literally. Sukea looked nervous when Sasuke admitted he was bisexual. Sasuke hesitated to kiss him to give the man an opportunity to stop him. He didn’t stop him. In fact, he kissed back.
Sukea’s lips were soft. They took Sasuke’s breath away. He had to put a hand on Sukea’s shoulder to steady himself. Then he took Sukea’s hand and guided it to his erection. He loved Sukea, but he also lusted after him. Part of it was desperation: he needed more than words or a kiss to assure him that Sukea would love him and stay with him. That anyone would love him and stay with him. He had a friend, but he needed a lover. He craved intimacy. He was overwhelmed with the idea of being with this man.
Sukea initiated the second kiss. Sasuke grew lightheaded. Maybe he could have one thing he desired. Every other thing he wanted was impossible. Maybe he could have this.
Then, Sukea rejected him. It was a gentle rejection, but Sasuke couldn’t sleep that night. He was anxious that he’d jeopardized the second most important relationship he had right now. He should have waited. He should have learned more about him. Should have suggested the idea of a relationship before trying to kiss him. Stupid!
All night, all day, and all night, he would fall asleep for a few minutes before his anxiety would just wake him up again. Sukea didn’t come over or invite him to dinner. He felt sick.
Despite being normally emotionless, Naruto and Kakashi picked up on his distress. Oh, how they would laugh. The cold, emotionless, stoic Uchiha anxious over love. Sleepless over it. The fact he was in love at all. So ridiculous.
The fact they needed to bring prisoners back meant Sasuke was a long way from his pillow for a while more. The mission did wear him out, so he did get a few hours sleep. Kakashi saw to it by giving him last watch. He had to get up first, but at least he didn’t have to wake up and try to go back to sleep. With prisoners to watch, even with the ninken, every watch member needed to be alert. Luckily, Sasuke looked more like an irritated tiger than a man trying desperately to keep his eyes open.
The day after they came back, there was a knock on his door. Sukea never approached him in the morning or daytime, but he didn’t care; he wanted to see Sukea. He needed reassurance that Sukea didn’t hate him now. He gave no thought to the fact it wasn’t likely to be Sukea.
It was Kakashi at his door. The disappointment nearly took him to his knees. Last night had been restless again. He hadn’t slept well in days. Kakashi said he’d have a few days off. He appreciated Kakashi’s concern, but there was nothing his captain could do.
He shut his door on his worried captain. It was cloudy that day. The dim light filled his room, but it was gloomy and depressing. He didn’t normally find days like this depressing; he preferred cloudy days to sunny. It was this dingy, little room. He felt lonely. A cold, dimly lit room.
It seemed like he leaned back against his door all day. Had it been a minute or a day?
He focused his eyes on the Uchiha banner. It darkened the room. His clan was suffocating him. But he couldn’t take it down. It seemed to be telling him that Sukea was the wrong choice; he needed to take a female lover to continue the clan. He was being chided by a piece of cloth.
He was so tired; he lost all sense of time. He sat on his bed at some point. He was vaguely aware that night had passed. The room felt more like a tomb. What was he going to do if Sukea never came back? He didn’t have the strength to open himself up to someone else. Not again when was rejected. For a moment, he thought about letting himself rot here. What was the purpose of doing anything? For what?
Then Sukea arrived. Sasuke was relieved. Revitalized. Even talking about death as they had dinner didn’t dampen that sense of relief. He was so happy not to be fully rejected that he forgot his fears and teased and flirted with him. Watching Sukea’s reactions was delightful. The way his eyes went wide when Sasuke subtly suggested he was attracted to older men elated him. Sukea was thinking about it. He was considering taking Sasuke up on his offer.
As a sign of his trust, Sasuke took Sukea to his sanctuary: his rooftop perch. Of course, the fact he often slept up here and the relief he was feeling made him pass out. He trusted Sukea enough to allow himself to fall asleep. Sukea didn’t leave him.
Knowing Sukea didn’t hate him allowed him to sleep soundly for the first time in a week when he got home. He woke up with new life. He wanted to do more to make this place more than a room to sleep and shower. He went back to that warehouse where he bought his furniture and bought the curtains, lamp, rug, bedding, and the pots for the new plants. It was depressing to him that there was so much left. The village was, for the most part, rebuilt. People had gone back to their old trades. New furniture was being made. He was one of the last digging through the detritus.
After redecorating, Sasuke went back out for ingredients. Feeling renewed, Sasuke wanted to make Zōni soup for them both. It felt like a new year. Even if Sukea rejected his love, he did want to continue their friendship. But he felt Sukea cracking.
As he was paying, he looked down at the bills. The leaf symbol arrested his attention. He only hesitated a moment before handing the bills over. He shook away his feelings about that symbol and the money and how no matter how virtuous anyone tried to make them, all shinobi, from a village or not, were all just mercenaries. Fighting and spying and killing for money. It wasn’t the morality that bothered him, it was the hypocrisy. Being a Konoha shinobi was little different than being an Akatsuki mercenary or an ordinary nuke-nin. He wondered what his brother thought of that. He mentally scoffed. He already knew. People make their own realities. It wasn’t hypocrisy; it was denial.
He tossed those thoughts aside. He had something here now.
He smiled when he greeted Sukea. The man had brought his camera and album. That made him even happier.
They spoke of Kakashi that night. All their conversations about Kakashi had gone back through Sasuke’s head after Kakashi’s confession. He thought he should feel bad about the disrespect in some of things he said to Sukea, but he didn’t. Most of the small lashing out he retracted. He now recognized that Kakashi had resisted defending himself a few times but did on occasion. He also did a few things to push Sasuke toward Kakashi. He was hesitant the entire time. He knew it was wrong to cultivate a relationship like this, but he couldn’t let Sasuke go any more than Sasuke could let him go.
Thinking about it now with Kakashi asleep in his bed, Sasuke turned to see the two photographs they took that night. After Kakashi confessed, Sasuke had cried at the sight of the one of the two of them. He’d turned it down. It was up now. He was so happy that night. Sukea didn’t fully accept him, but he hadn’t outright rejected him. He was nervous. It was so fun to tease him.
When he went on that mission alone with Kakashi, he gave some thought to Sukea’s markings. He suddenly remembered the photo of Kakashi when he was genin. Purple markings on someone’s face. He went looking for a record of clan markings when they got home. He found nothing. Nor could he remember what Kakashi’s teammate name was. He had to ask around and someone told him it was Nohara Rin. He tracked down a photo of her. They were the right color.
He sensed something between Kakashi and Sukea and thought maybe Sukea was related to Rin. Sukea denied it but Sasuke started to wonder. He knew Sukea was wearing a wig, makeup, and decals; it was a disguise. He’d briefly looked for something about the man. He looked harder now. There were a few missions where “Sukea” was mentioned. It was a code name. Kakashi had mentioned that it was a code name. If he took on more missions, then they were ANBU or classified missions.
Who had Sukea’s height and could easily hide his identity with a little makeup? Kakashi. At the time, Sasuke huffed. There was no way Sukea was Kakashi. Kakashi wouldn’t do that.
As insular as Sasuke was, he felt comfortable being open with Sukea—even if Sukea wasn’t. The question was finally asked: who had Sasuke slept with? He knew it was his confidence that had given him away. Sasuke wanted to tell him.
Arata was terrified of him. Terrified of a fourteen-year-old. A fourteen-year-old with black eyes and an arrogant, frosty demeanor. He didn’t revel in the power he had over others as Orochimaru’s favorite and his own power, but he certainly did nothing to dispel it.
He didn’t think about Arata very much. He had sex with him a handful of times, going both ways. He was experimenting. Right now, thinking about Arata only made him want to be with Sukea. He knew it would be better with him. He was certain the sex hadn’t been as great as he expected because there was absolutely no love there.
Then Sukea brought up the clan banner. The banner that made the room feel so much smaller. Smaller and darker. The banner that was suffocating him and silently scolding him.
Sukea said he didn’t need to display it. He said his clan wouldn’t be disrespected if he took it down. He fell even more in love. The man actually cared about him. Not about his clan, or his reputation. Sasuke cried after Sukea left. He loved the man so much. He didn’t care if Sukea wasn’t his real name, didn’t care he was ANBU, or that he might have a bad relationship with Kakashi. He didn’t care about anything. He loved him.
He took the banner down that very night, folding it up and throwing it under his bed.
He thought about that awkward meeting with Kakashi the next day. Kakashi had tried to reach out to him and all Sasuke could do was sass at him. He was ashamed of his behavior and Kakashi had definitely made him feel it. Not for the first time, Sasuke regretted they weren’t closer. He and Kakashi were so alike, they could be friends. But there was too much baggage. Abandonment, betrayal. They’d tried to murder each other. That hadn’t mattered to Naruto, but Sasuke was sure it had mattered to Kakashi. He was haunted by Kakashi’s words: ‘No matter how far Orochimaru fell, he still loved him . . . Now I know how the Third Hokage felt.’ It stung to be compared to Orochimaru, but what really hurt was that Kakashi did love him. Kakashi loved him and Sasuke had . . .
He tried to focus on his next meeting with Sukea after they finished training. He went home to clean up and change, then went back out to buy ingredients for dinner and some frames for Sukea’s photographs—he wanted to prove to Sukea how much he valued his gifts.
They talked a lot about Kakashi that night. Looking back, so much made sense. Kakashi/Sukea was torn. Knowing that, Sasuke could never hate him for the deception. Okay, he could, but not for long. That night, he got him to confess that Sukea wasn’t his real name. It was Kakashi’s last ditch effort to repel Sasuke. It failed miserably.
Sasuke finally got his answer. Sukea’s admission of love had surprised Sukea more than Sasuke. Sasuke finally heard the words he needed to hear. Not from Sakura or Karin who both had no more than schoolgirl crushes. He needed to hear them from a man he loved. He reveled in those words. They even helped push him to orgasm.
He was feeling unusually emotional as he came down from his orgasm. When Sukea admitted he was scared, it was like a sword to his heart—something he had unfortunate experience with. And Sukea saw through him. He saw how desperate he was. He felt more naked in front of him than ever. He finally admitted how he felt.
All his fears, anxiety, loneliness, all just fell out his mouth. The changes that made him feel alien, the way his world felt off, as if the sun was rising in the west. He admitted just how frightened he was.
Sukea didn’t say anything, but he held him. This is what he needed. More than a dinner friend, more than a lover, he needed support. He needed someone who would hold him. Someone who would never hate him or look down at him. Someone he could trust implicitly.
And that was one of the reasons he had trouble forgiving Kakashi at first.
Their next mission tested him. He knew Tsunade hadn’t done it on purpose; it wasn’t test by her. Oh, how he was tempted. If it wasn’t for Sukea and Naruto and disappointing Kakashi, Sasuke might have defected. He wanted to run away and live that kind of life again. It was better than hiding in a cheap room wondering if he might need to flee one day surrounded by a world he no longer understood.
Regardless, it had been a good mission. It was challenging and took advantage of his talents.
And it allowed him to have a moment with Kakashi. He’d apologized at Sukea’s urging, but he was able to thank Kakashi for not automatically thinking he would betray them.
However, the fact Sukea didn’t come to see him the night before he left on that mission left him unsettled. Nor did he come over the night Sasuke returned. Out of nervous desperation, he went to Kakashi’s apartment. They had a pleasant little bento meal on a retaining wall. It wasn’t as nice or intimate as his dinners with Sukea, but he enjoyed it. Even if Kakashi had warned him away from Sukea, he valued Kakashi’s insight.
The next evening, Sukea did come over. Sasuke was relieved. Sasuke felt they were more open with each other. They’d been very open since the beginning, but Sasuke felt more comfortable telling him about how that last mission made him feel and the conversation he had with Kakashi.
Finally, that night, Sasuke was able to seduce him. He knew Sukea was holding back, he knew Sukea wanted to have sex with him. Sukea caressed his cheek as he considered. Then he kissed him. Sasuke felt like a weight was lifted from him. All his fears melted away. He had what he wanted. All he wanted was Sukea to love him. He could feel the love and desperation in Sukea’s kiss and Sasuke answered them with equal measure.
The older man was still hesitant, but he wasn’t backing down this time. He let himself be guided by Sasuke and he finally had Sukea in his bed, under him. He decided to ride him for their first encounter because it would allow him to control everything. He could ease himself down and dictate the pace. After so long, Sukea’s cock felt amazingly thick. It did hurt. But Sasuke didn’t care. Sukea saying those words that made him unravel helped him relax and bare the pain.
Despite the burn in his thighs, Sasuke used every method he knew to please his lover. Not only moving up and down, but back and forth to vary the sensation.
Once he felt fully open and relaxed, he switched places with Sukea so he could fuck him properly. It seemed like his emotions were being amped up with every thrust. He loved him even more than he had an hour ago. They came at nearly the same time, both too pent up and desperate to make their first time together last.
They kissed as they came down from their orgasm. Sasuke never felt so . . . safe. He wasn’t alone. He wasn’t pinning in an unrequited love or resisting another’s affections. He finally knew what peace felt like.
Their pillow talk wasn’t the brightest. Sasuke confessed how he was prepared to flee Konoha if he felt the distrust of his clan grew too strong. When Sukea said he would protect him or go with him, Sasuke knew it was true. He wasn’t foolish to give his heart to this man.
Despite all that, when he felt Sukea leave the bed late that night, Sasuke couldn’t help the anxious feeling twisting his gut. He knew better than to trust. He trusted Sakura and the members of Taka to watch his back, he trusted Naruto and Kakashi in pretty much every way. For some reason, he trusted Sukea even more. What if that was a mistake? Kakashi had warned him against trusting Sukea.
But Sukea wasn’t leaving him. The way he cleaned his makeup—and drool—from Sasuke’s back would have made him smile if he was capable of any expression when woken up.
That would be he last night of peace for some time.
The next afternoon, he almost literally ran into Kakashi outside of Ichiraku. The man looked troubled and a bit sick. He later learned why.
Sasuke was smiling when he greeted his lover that night. When Sukea told him that he was finally to going to confess who he really was, Sasuke was calm. He didn’t care who he really was. He knew who he was, just not his real name. Whatever Sukea was stressing about wasn’t worth it. If Sukea had been honest with him in everything else, then his real name didn’t matter.
Sukea guided Sasuke’s hand to his decal. There was nothing under the first one. He went to take of the second, but Sukea stopped him. It was only at this moment Sasuke began to understand just how anxious Sukea was. He couldn’t understand what could be so bad, but he began to appreciate that Sukea believed it was important. Sasuke pulled the decal away.
A scar. The world was silent. Sasuke couldn’t even hear the rushing of his own blood. Sukea, or rather Kakashi, wiped the makeup from his eyelids. As if he needed to. All Sasuke needed was to see that scar.
Kakashi took Sasuke’s limp hands and covered his face with them. Sasuke felt the blood leave his head and the proof of what he already knew made his eyes widen. When Kakashi pulled the wig off, there was no denying who it was who was standing before him.
Sasuke heard what he had to say, but at the moment it was meaningless. His world had just crashed down around him. He felt betrayed. By Kakashi and Sukea. By his captain and his lover. He felt hollow.
He was too shocked to respond. Kakashi wouldn’t . . . Kakashi wouldn’t . . . lie to him. Deceive him. Kakashi wouldn’t do that to him. Not one of the few people he trusted. Not one of his anchors. Kakashi wouldn’t betray him.
He had heard Kakashi’s words and now their meaning came into focus. Sasuke told him the truth: he didn’t think he could forgive him.
Kakashi acknowledged that and turned to leave, but Sasuke stopped him. He needed to know who this man before him was, but he really didn’t know anymore. He put his hand on Kakashi’s bare cheek and slowly kissed him. Kakashi kissed him passionately. He felt all the desperation and despair rushing out of Kakashi. Kakashi knew he might lose Sasuke forever.
But the kiss told Sasuke all he needed to know. This man loved him. Not just desired him or liked his company. This man loved him. Kakashi’s words came back to him: he thought about faking Kakashi’s death so he could only be Sukea. For him. The betrayal hurt, but him leaving would be debilitating.
Assured that Kakashi was the man who loved him, he stopped Kakashi from fleeing. It took time for him to relax around this new person. It wasn’t Sukea or Kakashi. Sasuke was still off kilter even once they went to bed together. They didn’t have sex, just slept next to each other.
In the morning, it was a little bit of a shock to see an unmasked Kakashi in his bed. And to be cuddling with him. He needed to get away from him. He hid in the bathroom. He didn’t really think, just went through his routine. Exiting gave him a start. There was Kakashi. He looked as nervous as Sasuke felt. Kakashi all but stammered. Sasuke let him flee.
He felt a bit numb sitting there after Kakashi left. Still in shock.
When he reflected on their time together, he was embarrassed by the things he confessed to Sukea. He was also embarrassed about things he said about Kakashi, both good and bad. At least Kakashi knew Sasuke’s true feelings.
But the deception angered him. It had been weeks and Kakashi couldn’t muster the courage to tell him the truth. He made a fool of him. He could have just told him.
But then he considered how hard that would be. Kakashi had dug himself deeper and deeper making it harder and harder to come clean. Sasuke couldn’t deny that.
It was in Sasuke’s nature to nurse hatred in his heart. Sasuke wanted to feed his anger, but where his rage normally nested, he only felt emptiness. And loneliness. He missed Kakashi. It was Kakashi’s name, not Sukea’s, that rang through his mind. He missed Kakashi.
Kakashi and Sukea had both warned him. Kakashi should have told him the truth! Kakashi had resisted, was hesitant to sleep with him. Sasuke did push, but Kakashi should have told him! As soon as Sasuke came onto him, he should have come clean! He never should have had sex with him!
But then Sasuke remembered what he’d said: no matter how bad Sukea’s secret was, having sex with him wouldn’t make it worse. Well, it did. That made Sasuke feel guilty.
It was fate that their next mission happened to involve Orochimaru’s escapees. Sasuke refused to look at his captain. Today, it was the sex they had that troubled him. That was a side he didn’t want to show to Kakashi, not to someone he respected. He couldn’t meet his eyes. He was humiliated being looked at by him. He was afraid he’d blush if their eyes met. How did Kakashi see him now?
When Sasuke saw the bandits, he recognized several of them. He went in alone to assess the situation. He asked about Arata asked to passive aggressively lash out at Kakashi. Kakashi’s insecurity later proved it had worked. And it made Sasuke feel horrible. He’d wanted to lash out, but he regretted hurting the older man.
He was faced with another offer to become a rogue. This offer repulsed him as much as it tempted him. He still hadn’t forgiven Kakashi. If he couldn’t forgive him . . . He might need to run away. Heartbreak was like poison to an Uchiha.
Despite that, Sasuke’s heart also ached for people like himself. There were a lot of misguided people hanging around Orochimaru. So many who felt like they couldn’t go home. He might have been the worst of them, but Konoha let him come back. He advised them to go home.
He may be calm by nature, but when Taiki spit at him, Sasuke marked him. He wasn’t normally petty, but he was going to kill him anyway.
Later, when he scouted the enemy camp, he warned some that they were about to attack. He let a few of them to flee. Perhaps he had become soft.
As for Taiki, Sasuke broke his jaw before killing him. He had little tolerance for disrespect, especially from a former subordinate. In retrospect, that was hilariously ironic considering his disrespect for his own captain.
Sasuke decided on their way home that he would talk to Kakashi. It was time to reconcile. He was still angry, but he didn’t want to be alone anymore, and he wanted to be with Kakashi. He knew that no matter what, he did love the asshole.
And he had to admit, Kakashi was a handsome asshole.
After that, he was able to relax again. He was able to smile again. Then when he met him up on the rooftop, he was able to lay it out now that he’d had the time to think about it.
Last night, he had no reservations. Neither of them did. They had admitted their feelings not only to each other but to their teammates. They were firmly together now.
Kakashi hadn’t stirred despite the fact he was being stared at because it was only a pair of empty eyes staring at him. As Sasuke woke up, life bled into his eyes and his expression lightened. He looked away to avoid provoking Kakashi’s shinobi senses.
He took a cold shower, reserving as much warm water as possible even though the other residents might use it before Kakashi would get to it. He had to clean semen off his body in various stages of drying.
He got dressed while glancing at his sleeping lover. He sat on the bed, trying to avoid any semen on the sheets. He pulled the blanket down to wake Kakashi. He exposed most of Kakashi’s chest. It was a bright morning and gave Sasuke his first real opportunity to examine his body. Lots of small, faded scars. Not unusual with a shinobi of Kakashi’s experience. Then there were the most recent ones. The cross shaped scars that traversed his entire upper body and another that impaled him, sliding right between his lung and spine. That looked like the most nearly fatal wound. Obito had deeply wounded him emotionally and psychologically, then he’d managed to wound him physically.
Sasuke put his hand on that stab wound. Kakashi didn’t stir. He so implicitly trusted Sasuke’s presence that he didn’t react to being touched. Kakashi had touched his scar and Sasuke now felt the same way Kakashi had. How close were they both to losing the other? They almost never had this moment. Sasuke laid his head on Kakashi’s chest, his ear over his heart. He could hear it.
Kakashi woke up. He put his hand on Sasuke’s head and lightly mused his damp hair. The deep breath he took as he woke up rumbled in Sasuke’s ear.
It wasn’t a comfortable position, so Sasuke sat up. “I’m sorry I told you not to worry about this wound that killed me. I hadn’t really looked at your scars. Obito nearly killed you.”
Kakashi sat up too. “He wasn’t the only one. Pain was the only one to actually manage it.”
“You might have died while fighting him, but you actually died of chakra exhaustion. No one’s killed you yet. It took someone like Madara to kill me. It would be the same for you.”
“You have too much confidence in me.”
“As Hokage in this new age, you won’t face anyone that powerful again.”
“I’ll leave them all to you,” Kakashi said smiling.
“I’ll handle any threats. Now clean my wall.”
“I’m not licking it clean.”
“That was your suggestion. It’s not sexy when it’s dry. I’ll start breakfast.”
Sasuke heard the shower turn on as he began making breakfast. The thought that Kakashi was naked just on the other side of the wall made Sasuke smile. He was naked in his bed too, but the thought still made him happy.
Sasuke wasn’t even half done when Kakashi came into the kitchen, a towel still wrapped around his waist. He was holding up a white toothbrush.
“Um, is this for me?” Kakashi asked.
“Yes. You should leave spare clothes here as well.”
“Oh, yeah. No clean clothes here.”
Sasuke smirked at him. “Want to try on my clothes?”
He loved Kakashi’s blush.
“My chest is a little thicker, though you’re taller than me; I still haven’t finished growing. I think you can fit into some of my clothes.”
Kakashi giggled nervously. “I don’t think they’ll look good on me.”
“Well, you better wear something of mine while we eat breakfast; your bare chest is too distracting.”
Sasuke wished it was only distracting because he was sexy, but it was also because of the scars.
“At least put my robe on.”
“Hai, hai.” Kakashi retreated while Sasuke finished making their meal.
Kakashi sat at the table with the robe on. It showed a bit of his upper chest where there were no scars. Sasuke let his eyes linger for a moment as he served the food.
Sharing meals with Kakashi, sharing his cooking with him, always made Sasuke feel like he was with family. He made meals for them so often because the process calmed him and being with Kakashi relaxed him. All his tension and worries faded into the background.
“You cook all the time; I should cook for us sometime,” Kakashi said.
“I thought you couldn’t cook.”
“I’m no chef like you, but I take care of myself. I’m really good at cooking fish. The only thing I’m good at cooking. After my father died, I got the usual stipend for being an orphan, but I normally went out and fished for my meals. I bought a book on cooking fish and just got good at the one thing. I think I made every recipe five times. I guess that’s why I like fish. Though there are a few I got sick of.”
That made Sasuke pause. That was depressing. It reminded him of all the lonely cooking he’d done in his life. They did grow up similarly.
“Yeah, I’d love to try it.”
Kakashi smiled. Sasuke melted. That smile, even when he was completely happy, was always tinged with sadness. Sasuke could see it despite the rainbow shaped eyes and wide smile. It was a little too forced. Too exaggerated. Sasuke loved him even more. He knew he was the same. Behind every smirk and emotionless mask was lurking a deep grief. They were the same.
“How about I make us dinner? Mackerel Meuniere? I can shop for the ingredients today. We shouldn’t have a mission until tomorrow.”
“I’m not sure we should try your cooking before a mission,” Sasuke smirked. “Wouldn’t want to get sick in the middle of a fight.”
Kakashi chuckled. “Scared? I thought you were immune to poisons.”
“Not food poisoning.”
“We have to build up your tolerance.”
“Alright. Challenge accepted.”
Kakashi insisted on helping to clean up. Afterward, Sasuke grabbed him by the collar of the robe he was wearing and pushed up against the wall and kissed him. Kakashi put his arms around him.
“I never thought I’d be so happy,” Kakashi said. “I never thought I’d be so in love. Especially not with a little brat like you.”
“I’d given up on the idea of happiness the night my clan died, when I lost my family. You’re my family now. Who would have thought I’d fall in love and be happy with a lazy, old jounin?”
Kakashi captured his lips in another kiss. Sasuke grabbed Kakashi’s neck with is left hand.
Sasuke smiled evilly when they parted. “So, how are you getting home? You trained in your uniform yesterday. Going to sneak out in my clothes or are you going to run home naked?”
Kakashi narrowed his eyes at him. “Brat.”
“You’re the one who fell in love with a brat. You did clean my wall, right?”
Kakashi growled. “Yeah, I did. I’ll wear some of your clothes and henge.”
Sasuke smiled with satisfaction.
“I didn’t get a good look at your kitchen; is it sufficient to cook a real meal?”
“Yeah. Of course, I don’t have a real table. I eat at my desk.”
“Want to come over here to cook?”
“I probably should; you have a table.”
“You’re welcome anytime. You should know how to break in when I’m not here. Just don’t leave any marks that will forfeit my deposit.”
“What kind of shinobi do you take me for?”
“An old one.”
Kakashi scoffed. “I think I’ll tell my friends about us today. I know they will object because you were my student and the age difference, but I’ll deal with that.”
“Well, I’m thinking of letting our relationship leak today. Get it out in the open. I think talking to Naruto about it in public and letting people hear will do it.”
Kakashi took a deep breath. “We’re outing ourselves today. I’m ready. Know that I will weather any storm alongside you.”
“Thank you.”
“If things get bad and you don’t feel safe coming here, you can break into my place too. Or I’ll meet you on the rooftop.”
“Agreed.”
-----
Sasuke dressed in a black, high collared shirt. Like most of his wardrobe, it had the Uchiha fan emblazoned on his back. He wanted to feel a little covered up, but he wasn’t going to hide, especially when he was purposely trying to out himself.
“So, what’d you want to talk about?” Naruto asked.
Naruto already knew the plan. They were walking down the main throughfare, not trying to keep their voices down at all.
“I wanted to know how you felt about my relationship with Kakashi. I know it was quite a shock for you.”
Sasuke felt all the attention that was suddenly on him from all directions. Many people were now eavesdropping on them. Exactly as Sasuke hoped.
“It seemed pretty sudden, but you have known each other for a long time. You guys are sort of similar, so I guess it’s not that surprising. I just didn’t think either of you were gay.”
“Well, bisexual actually. Neither of us really care about gender. I am annoyed that I fell for such an apathic asshole.” Sasuke let himself smirk. “But I do love him.”
“So, who started it?”
“Hn. I did. Once I apologized for everything I did, we started meeting up to talk. I fell hard and fast. I asked Sukea for advice since he knows both of us. He warned and encouraged me to confess my feelings. Kakashi was hesitant, but eventually he confessed that he felt the same. We have no intention of hiding our relationship, but I wanted to tell you first. You are like a brother to me.”
“Thanks. I’ve always seen you as a brother. Of course, I’ll support you! I’d never abandon you or Kakashi-sensei!”
“I appreciate that. I know there are a lot of people who will object because of our ages, the fact we were teacher and student, and that we’re both male, but I don’t care. I warned him that he might lose the position of Hokage because of it, but Kakashi said he’d choose us over the promotion. If people can’t accept our relationship, then I don’t think they deserve him as Hokage.”
“I agree! Kakashi is the best candidate for Hokage! Except for me, of course!”
“Hn.”
“I got your back.”
“Thanks.”
Sasuke could hear the whispers as they turned the corner. The rumor mill will do the rest.
“Thanks,” Sasuke said in a lower voice.
“No problem. I’ll answer any questions and set straight anyone who tries to use your relationship against you. I’ll defend you. I’ve got your back,” Naruto repeated.
“I’ve got your back too. Let me know if I can help you out with anything.”
“I will. You owe me.”
“A debt I can never fully repay.”
Sasuke felt no malevolence behind him, only curiosity. Maybe he could stay in the village. Maybe he and Kakashi could live quietly without the scorn of the village.
- 10
- 11
- 12
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