Adult-FanFiction.org : Naruto

Bloody Tears	By : bloodyreign Category: Naruto > Het - Male/Female Views: 1170 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in Naruto. I make no profits off this. I do not own the Fandom of Naruto, nor do I own any characters of Naruto.

Chapter List
- 10
- 11
- 12
“Star,” I heard someone say softly. A hand touched my shoulder, shook me lightly. I opened my eyes to find light, pale teal eyes looking down at me. I jumped, eyes widening, then realized who it was. Gaara. He was kneeling beside me.
I sat up, rubbing my eyes. “Wh-what are you doing here?”
“You lost the Heaven Scroll I gave you.”
“Ye-yea, but how did you get back here? Didn’t you finish?”
He nodded. “Of course.” He held something out to me.
I looked down. A Heaven Scroll. I reached out, took it from his hands gently. “Thanks,” I said softly.
He touched my cheek. “There’s a cut again. . . .”
I reached up to touch the scabbed-over cut. I must’ve gotten it when I’d been running through the woods because I didn’t remember it.
He reached up slightly and pulled a cord over his head. Attached to the cord was a small, blue vial filled with some liquid. He put the cord over my head, settling it around my neck. “It’s blood. One sip should heal you.”
I touched it, lifting it so I could sniff it. “It’s mostly your sister’s, isn’t it?”
He nodded. “Yes.”
“Thank you.” I touched his arm when he stood, grabbing his hand and pulling myself to my feet with his help. “Why are you doing this?” I asked, studying his eyes.
He glanced away for a moment, then back to me, a small blush. “Why were you nice to me?”
“Because . . . I’ve never met someone who deserved it so much.”
A small, small smile. “There’s the answer to your question, then.” A sound, something moved behind him. His eyes slid slightly to the right, toward the sound, narrowing.
I looked behind him to see Sasuke standing with his eyes narrowed, fists clenched. “You came. . . .”
I held the Heaven Scroll up. “He gave us this.”
“Who did you kill to get it?” he growled.
“It doesn’t matter,” I said. “What matters is he went out of his way to do it.” I smiled up at Gaara. “Don’t mind him.”
His eyes slid back to me, but the smile was gone. The look on his face was blank. I hated seeing that look.
I threw my arms around his throat, hugging him tightly. “He’s just jealous because he couldn’t find one himself,” I murmured in his ear.
For a moment, he was stiff, hard, against me, then he relaxed, drawing me closer with his arms around my waist.
I hugged him tighter. “I know it’s a little late to ask, but can we be friends?”
He drew back, eyes peering into my own. “I thought we already were.”
I kissed his cheek. “I just wanted to make sure.” I pulled away, smiling. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome.” There, in his eyes, I could see something. A softening, a smile. Something I’d missed until now. “Thanks for wanting to be my friend.”
I smiled. “Anyone who wouldn’t want to be your friend is missing out. You’re a great guy and I feel . . . I feel I’m going to treasure having you as a friend for as long as I live.”
That made another kind of look come into his eyes. A confusion, almost a sadness, with happiness mixed in. It was a strange look. “I’ve . . . never met someone like you before.”
“Star,” Sasuke said warningly behind us.
I ignored him and smiled. “And you never will again. I’m kind of one of a kind!”
That made him smile. “I. . . .” He breathed in deeply, his shoulders stiffened. A second passed and he let the breath out and his shoulders relaxed. “I can see that.” He put his hand to my cheek, moving my face slightly to the side so that I was meeting his eyes perfectly. His eyes flashed between mine quickly, as though he was searching for something.
Sasuke was suddenly at my side. “We should get going,” he growled, grabbing my arm and pulling me away from him. “We have to get to the tower, after all.”
“Gaara could guide us there,” I suggested.
After an intense staring contest with Sasuke, Gaara said, “I don’t think that would be wise.”
“I agree completely. Why don’t you get going, Gaara? We’ll meet you there.”
“Then we’ll settle this.” And he was gone.
I almost yelled for him to come back, almost ran after him, but Sasuke’s hand tightened and he turned me to him. His eyes glared into mine. “He almost kissed you again.”
“He did not!” My eyes widened. “That was a one-time thing!”
“What makes you think that?” he asked, voice low, dangerous.
I looked away, shaking my head. “He doesn’t like me like that.”
He made a sound that was dangerously close to the growling sounds Akamaru made. “Really?”
“Really. We’re friends.”
“Then why would he have kissed you in the first place?”
I blushed, shrugged. “I . . . I don’t know.”
“Star, look at me,” he said, voice strangely calm.
I glanced up at him, then away.
“Look at me.”
I shook my head. “What’s your-”
With a hand on each side of my face, he moved my face up to him, forcing my eyes to glance up. “Look at me.” His voice was soft, gentle.
It was that tone that made me look up at him. My eyes were wide.
“Why do you think I kissed you?”
My eyes fell away from his and I could feel myself blushing.
“Star? Answer me.”
“I-I do-don’t know.”
A small, wry chuckle. “You really are shy. I see why you and Hinata are friends.”
“I’m not shy.”
“Look at me, tell me why I kissed you.”
I tried to look away, tried to shake my head, but he held me firm.
“Why did I do it?”
I studied him, eyes wide. “I don’t know.”
“Do you want to know why?” Before I could answer, he went on to say, “I kissed you because you’re someone I can see myself spending my life with. You’re strong, you’re not annoying.” A small, twisted smile. “You’re a little hyper and bouncy, but I find it amusing and cute, not annoying.” The smile disappeared. “You’re the only girl I can stand to be near without thinking about killing.”
“Th-well, aren’t we . . . friends?”
He cocked his head to the left slightly. “I’d like to think that friends don’t kiss.”
“That was a one-time thing, too, right?” I could feel some emotion in my eyes, could feel some emotion building in me, one I couldn’t name.
A small, small smile. “Your eyes . . . it’s like you’re afraid of something. Why are you so afraid to have someone care about you?”
“I don’t . . . I’m not afraid.”
He raised one brow, clearly doubting what I said.
“It’s just . . . I don’t see why you would care. . . . I’m just me. There’s nothing special about me.”
“You’re wrong there. There’s a lot special about you. Who else but you would go up to the most dangerous person within a hundred miles and give him cupcakes and a hug? Who else but you would I allow to touch me? To Gaara, you’re special because you’re the first one to show him he’s not a monster. To me, you’re special because you’re the only one I care about anymore. In much the same way, Gaara and I have similar bonds with you. You’re the only one we truly care for.”
“Gaara cares about his sister,” I said quickly.
A small, wry smile. “Let’s say that’s true, but even if it is, you’re still the only one he cares about that isn’t family.”
“We’re friends. . . .”
“You’re the first friend he’s ever had.”
“I’m sure he’s had other friends.”
A raised brow again. “And you’re the only one I can stand. Who else do I talk to the way I talk to you? I haven’t kissed anyone but you, Star. What does that tell you?“
I couldn’t help but say, “What about Naruto?”
He rolled his eyes. “That was an accident and you know it.”
“It was still funny.”
Same reaction. “Star, I’m being serious here. Just let it sink in.” He touched the necklace he’d given me. “Look around. What other girls have I given this to?” Now he touched the vial. “And what other girls has he given this to?”
My eyes slid away.
“Ask him, Star. I dare you. Ask him about the necklace. Ask him about how he feels. He’ll tell you.” He moved his hand, putting one under my chin and raising my face as he leant in, touching his lips to mine.
I tried to fight it, tried to ignore it, but I leant into him, putting my hands to his shoulders as I did so.
“S-Star? Sasuke?” Naruto said softly. “W-what’s going on?”
I pushed away from him instantly, looking over to meet Naruto’s wide eyes. I could feel that I was blushing.
“Oh! You came to the same conclusion, did you?!” A grin split his face and he leapt over to me. He hugged me. “It’s about time he gave into his feelings, isn’t it?” He turned to Sasuke, ignoring the annoyed look on his face. “I told you! I’m glad you finally owned up to it!”
“Naruto. . . .” he said warningly.
“I know, I know. I’ll be going back to sleep now.”
“Wait,” I said softly. “Wake up Sakura. Let’s get going. We have a Heaven Scroll.”
He looked back at me, eyes wide again. “We do?”
“Yea.”
“All right!” He fist-pumped the air. “Let’s get going!” He ran over to shake Sakura awake, chattering happily when her eyes opened.
I smiled. “Let’s go.”
�@
Naruto stood at the head of the line, Sakura behind him and Sasuke between me and Sakura. I, as usual, was at the back.
Sasuke had his hand to the mark, grimacing just slightly. His energy was slightly lower than it was supposed to be since his powers and the mark were fighting. It zapped his strength. He was looking toward the front of the big room.
I touched his shoulder and he turned to look at me. “Are you okay?”
He nodded. “Yes.”
“I can heal you,” I said softly.
He shook his head. “You need your energy, Star. Don’t waste it on me. I’ll be fine.”
“I can heal with blood, too.”
Silence. For a moment. He seemed to be thinking it over. “Okay, then.”
I pulled one kunai out, placed it to my wrist. With Sakura and Naruto watching with widened eyes, I started to slide the kunai across my wrist-
It was blocked by sand. I looked up to meet Gaara’s eyes. I blinked.
He shook his head.
I nodded, mouthed, “I’ll heal it in a moment. I need my blood.” I touched the vial of blood around my throat.
After a moment, he let the sand fade away, returning to him. He gave one curt nod, but didn’t take his eyes off me.
I slit my wrist just enough to let it bleed freely.
“What do I do?”
“I can either smear the kunai with blood or you can drink from my wrist. It’s up to you.”
He took my offered wrist, swallowing twice before he pulled back to lick his lips clean. “Thanks.” I felt his energy soar, his wounds healed as it did.
Looking over at Gaara, I lifted the vial, uncorked it and took a sip. I held my wrist up for him to see it heal.
He nodded.
“What was that?!” Sakura nearly shrieked it loud enough for nearby teams to hear.
“I can heal with energy, as you saw with Lee, or I can heal with blood. Sasuke didn’t want me using my energy, so I used my blood,” I said it loud enough for Gaara to hear, meeting his eyes.
Again, a nod and his eyes softened, shoulders relaxing just slightly as he understood.
“Star?” Sasuke asked quietly. “You have sharp teeth, right?”
I nodded, looking back at him. “Why?”
“I think I gained that from you. . . .”
I smiled, then laughed. “Oh, wow. Watch out. Try not to bite your lip.”
“I already have.”
I laughed again. “Good luck with them. It’s hard to remember not to bite your tongue off.”
The Fourth Hokage came into the room and Gaara looked toward him for a moment, then he started to walk to him quickly, stride long and purposeful. When he spoke, his voice was low enough that I couldn’t hear.
The Fourth Hokage’s eyes widened slightly and the both of them turned and walked back toward where the Fourth Hokage had come from.
“Wonder what that’s about,” Naruto said softly.
I shrugged. “His siblings look like they’re just going with it. Temari looks a little shocked and Kankuro looks a bit annoyed and worried.”
“You know them by name?” Sakura asked, staring at me.
“They’re my friends.”
Her eyes widened more and she stared at them. “T-them? That creepy-”
“Say it, Sakura, I swear I will hurt you,” I growled. “Gaara is my friend and there is nothing that will change that, so don’t disrespect him or call him names because I won’t stand by and let you do that. He’s a great guy. He’s just been through a lot of pain.”
She nodded. “Okay, I won’t say anything about him. I’m sorry if I offended you.”
“You didn’t.”
Temari was smiling at me when I looked over. There was a happiness in her eyes that she let me see.
I smiled back, giving her a small nod.
She nodded back. “Thank you,” she mouthed.
“Always,” I mouthed back.
Kankuro was smiling, but his eyes were troubled, confused, as he studied me.
I smiled brightly at him. “I’m weird, I know!” I mouthed.
The troubled look vanished and he grinned, nodding.
“I don’t think Gaara’s that bad, really!” Naruto said, putting his arms behind his head, crossed, and leaning his head into them. “I think he’s just afraid to be rejected!”
“Like you,” I said, smiling slightly. I looked toward where Gaara and the Fourth Hokage had disappeared, feeling worry build in me. What was he doing?
Sasuke looked back at me, a frown on his face. “He’s doing what it takes to keep you as a friend.”
I looked up at him. “W-what?”
“Drinking your blood gave me the ability to go through his head. I did. What’s on his mind right now is you and your friendship. He’s doing what it takes to keep you.”
“What does that have to do with the Fourth Hokage?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. That’s all he was thinking when he went up to him.”
“I don’t understand. . . .” I reached out with my mind, searching for him. When I found him, I felt unsure about whether or not I should go into his mind like that. I felt it as mind-rape. I pulled back, not willing to invade his privacy. A moment later, I reached out again, but not to invade. I just wanted to know if he was okay. The energy and the vibe of him said he was fine, but that he was doing a great deal of thinking, worrying. I pulled back moments later. “I don’t know what he’s doing, but I do know he’s thinking about something.”
“You.”
“What makes you say that?”
He shrugged. “As I said, I went into his mind. He’s worrying whether his decision will keep you as a friend or lose you.” He glanced at Temari. “She’s wondering the same thing. She’s afraid that if you decide to walk away from him, that he’ll lose it. She seems to think the same thing I do.”
“And what is that?”
“That he’s falling for you.”
I looked over at Temari and she met my eyes. I reached out with my mind, not to read, but to talk. Temari, I said.
She stiffened, looking around.
It’s me, Star. I’m talking directly to you.
She looked toward me, eyes wide, one brow raised.
I nodded. It’s me, yea. Don’t talk out loud, just think and I’ll hear you.
Can you do this with everyone?
Yes. It’s my ability. What’s Gaara doing?
I don’t know, really.
Are you afraid that what he’s doing will jeopardize his friendship with me?
He is.
Why?
He is afraid that if he doesn’t do this, it’ll make you hate him and he’s afraid that if he does do it and you find out, you’ll hate him anyway.
So he chose to do it anyway? Why?
She shrugged. I don’t know. I don’t know what he’s doing.
When he comes out, please tell him that there’s nothing he could do that would make me hate him. I don’t care what it is he thinks he did wrong, he’s still my friend and nothing will change that. Please tell him that. That’s what I wanted to say. Will you tell him?
Yes, but how can you be sure of that?
Because . . . he’s my friend. I don’t turn my back on my friends, no matter what they do. He’s my friend. I wouldn’t turn my back on him. Please let him know.
Why don’t you tell him yourself?
I want to, but . . . I don’t feel comfortable speaking into his mind like this. You’re a girl, I feel more comfortable speaking into your mind.
She smiled. I see. I’ll tell my brother what you said.
Please do. I want him to know I’m not going anywhere.
Star . . . can I ask you something?
I’m in your mind, so yea.
Why did you choose my brother to befriend? Aren’t you afraid of him?
Not at all, no. I chose him because he feels alone, like I feel sometimes. I chose him because he deserves to know he’s not alone.
I’ll tell him what you said.
Thank you. I just want him to know that I’m not planning to go anywhere. Your brother is my friend now. I don’t leave my friends and I don’t turn away from them. He has my loyalty.
And you have his.
I hope that’s something that will never change.
My brother may not be very stable, but when it comes to changing his mind, he doesn’t change his mind. I don’t think his loyalty to you will change, either. He really cares about you.
And I care about him. Please let him know this. Bye. I signed out, cutting out of her mind, still meeting her eyes.
She nodded at me, eyes and face serious, but lips turned up in a small smile.
I turned away to see Sakura and Naruto staring at me, Sasuke looking toward where Gaara had disappeared. “Hi.”
They stared at me for a moment longer and Naruto said, “What was that about?! We called your name like five times and you didn’t even flinch!”
“Naruto even poked you and you didn’t respond.”
“That was before Sasuke said to leave you alone. . . .” Naruto added, glancing at the distracted boy.
I glanced at him, too. “I see. I’m sorry. I was thinking.”
“You and that girl were having a serious staring contest,” Naruto said.
I looked over at Kiba, who I felt staring at me, along with Hinata. I nodded, smiling, raising a hand to wave at them.
Hinata smiled shyly and waved and Kiba beamed, waving exuberantly. “Hi,” he mouthed.
I smiled, nodded. “Hi.”
A wave of power coursed through the room. I wouldn’t have noticed it had I not been looking out for it. The power filled this room to bursting full and I swayed, looking toward the door when Gaara came through it. The amount of power that filled the room, bursting from him was incredibly thick, pulsing with a life of its own. I glanced toward Sasuke and had a moment to wonder, Who’s stronger? Sasuke or Gaara? and my knees buckled under the pressure of that power. I fell.
Sasuke reached for me, but a wall of sand cradled my back, keeping me on my feet from behind. Sasuke gripped my shoulders, keeping me from falling forward.
Gaara’s eyes locked on mine and he walked toward me quickly, legs consuming ground easily and power washing over me as he came closer.
I worked on centering myself, pushing out with my power to keep his power at bay. I coated myself in my power, rolling it around my body. It was enough for me to be able to stand on my own.
Gaara was standing beside me by that time. “Are you okay?” he asked softly.
Everyone seemed to have shrunk away from him as he moved forward. Now I could see why. If everyone felt that power beating against them that way, then they had no choice but to move out of the way. The closer he got to me, the more that power beat against mine.
He studied me. “Star?”
I smiled shakily. “I-I’m fine.” I felt myself staring at him.
His eyes flashed between my eyes and he seemed to withdraw into himself, eyes slightly wide.
“Gaara, you’re . . . you’re powerful.”
He stiffened, eyes widening slightly.
“I didn’t expect you to be so powerful.”
He seemed very tense.
I smiled. “Don’t be so tense! I’m complimenting you!”
His eyes widened more and after a moment, he let a smile flash across his face. “Thank you.”
“It’s okay, Gaara. I was feeling out for you, to make sure you were okay, and my channels were open too wide, so when you came out, I felt your power fill the room and it took me by surprise. I’m fine, it’s okay.”
He gave one, quick nod. “I didn’t mean to surprise you.”
“It’s not your fault. It’s my fault. I didn’t expect you to be so powerful, so I left my channels too wide.” I smiled again. “I underestimated you. That’s my fault, not yours.”
He smiled. “Still, I did not mean to surprise you.”
The sand disintegrated and returned to him. I felt fine on my own, so I waved Sasuke off. “I’m fine. Thank you. I’m just a little open. All I need to do is shut my channels back down and I’ll be good as new.”
Hesitant, almost shy, Gaara stepped toward me and hugged me. It was a soft, hesitant hug.
I put my arms around his neck and hugged back, tightly. “Don’t worry, Gaara. I’m not going anywhere,” I murmured. “Ask your sister.” I pulled back and he let me go. “Go on, go back to your siblings.” I smiled. “Just don’t forget me, hm?”
He smiled. “Never.” He turned away, went back to his siblings. As before, everyone parted before him, letting him through. He stopped in front of Kiba and met his eyes.
Kiba stepped back, dropped his eyes.
Gaara nodded once at him and gave a very small smile to Hinata, who smiled shyly back, before he continued on to his siblings.
I smiled, meeting Gaara’s eyes as he stood before his sister. He gave a small nod before turning to talk quietly with his sister. I turned back to Sasuke, that nagging feeling building in me. Just how strong was the Uchiha? Was he stronger than Gaara, or wasn’t he? I grounded myself, locking my legs so I didn’t fall, and opened my channels, directing them at Sasuke. The channels filled immediately and, even with my legs locked, I stumbled back, nearly falling, but I kept my balance, even as Sasuke reached a hand toward me to keep me steady.
The closer that hand got to me, the more his power flooded through to me. There was something like a click and his power was gone, as if locked inside him, right before his hand touched my elbow and his fingers curled around my arm. “Star, I’d suggest you don’t do that too often,” he warned, voice low.
I stared at him. That amount of power was incredible, even with my own blood strengthening him, but it wasn’t the extremity of the power that really struck me. It was how thick, tangible it was and how my own power inside me had roiled in recognition, reaching upward to freedom.
“Star?” Sakura asked, staring at Sasuke’s hand on my elbow.
I shook my head, shaking the remnants of his power from me and straightened. “I’m fine,” I mumbled. “Fine.”
He let me go, slowly, hesitantly. “Don’t do that again. You’re not ready for it yet.”
“R-ready for what?”
He gave me blank eyes, which let me know he was up to something.
“Sasuke?”
“Nothing. It doesn’t matter.” He turned away.
�@
I’d watched Sasuke’s battle, watched him triumph quickly, easily, watched Kakashi-Sensei lead him off. It took a short while, but my turn came quickly. My opponent was taller than me-big surprise!-with brown hair and green eyes. He was thin, almost sickly so, pale and hunched in a fighting crouch.
I stood, straight and tall, arms crossed, as the start of the battle was commenced. He ran at me, waving his arms blindly. I rolled my eyes and, arms still crossed, I side-stepped him, keeping my eyes on him.
He slid, but turned back and ran back at me again.
For the second time, I side-stepped him. Once again, he turned and ran at me. This time I stayed in place until he was right in front of me, then I stepped to the side, but not to escape him. I gripped his arm in my hands tightly, swung him around and let him go. He went flying. I reached my hand out to fling energy at him and that black glow with silver dots surrounded my hand and quickly reached toward him, swallowing him whole. The glow and the silver dots were transparent enough that I could still see his body through the glow so when small, bleeding cuts appeared on his body as my power cut into his veins, it was visible to everyone. Thin crimson rivers ran down his body to drip from his feet to the ground, three feet below. He was screaming.
I felt sick to my stomach. I hadn’t wanted to do that. My hand was flat, palm aimed at him and when I tried to move my hand away, his body followed. I shivered, covered my eyes with my arm and closed my hand quickly. I heard screams other than his as blood and other, thicker things flew. The blood didn’t hit me, didn’t touch me, but it made a mess not inches from my feet. I opened my eyes, let my hand fall. I could feel eyes on me and I looked up to meet Gaara’s eyes. My eyes were wide, frightened, I could feel it. I turned and ran from the building. The moment I was outside, I dropped to my knees and vomited.
A hand smoothed my hair back, holding it behind my head as someone knelt behind me, chest against my back. Someone else held a handkerchief down to me. I wiped my mouth and leant back against the person behind me, closing my eyes. “What was that?” I whispered.
Arms came around me, holding me against the chest.
I heard someone kneel on each side of me. “It’s okay, Star,” Kiba said softly.
Someone reached toward me, but held back. “We’re right here,” Hinata whispered.
I opened my eyes to see Kiba on my left side and Hinata on my right. When I looked back, I saw the reason nobody was touching me. I was leaning against Gaara. I turned in his arms, hands locking on his shoulders. “I didn’t mean to do that.”
“It was my move,” Gaara said, voice empty.
“But how did I get it? I only gain abilities through blood. I’ve never drank your blood.”
“Can you gain abilities through energy?” he asked.
I shrugged. “I don’t know. Why?”
“The first day I met you, when I gave you the blood, I pushed my energy into you.”
“That could do it.” I snuggled into him. “That’s your move, huh?”
He nodded.
“Remind me not to get on your bad side, then,” I said, breathing in. “Thanks, Gaara.”
“For what?”
“For being here, for holding me.” I pulled back enough to smile up at Kiba. “Thanks for coming out.” Smiling at Hinata, I said, “Both of you.”
Someone behind Gaara cleared his throat. I looked up to see Neji, Lee, Choji, Shino, Shikamaru and Naruto. I smiled at them all. “Thanks to you all. Really.”
“We stand by our friends,” Neji said.
Lee beamed. “Always!”
Tenten, Ino and Sakura came out, Tenten in front of them. She smiled slightly. “Always.”
I didn’t see Gaara’s siblings. I looked up at him. He was up on his knees and I wasn’t, which made him just slightly taller than me. “Did you leave Temari and Kankuro?”
I heard a “hey!” from beside Hinata and turned to see Temari’s legs. I looked up to see her. She smiled. “No, we both came.”
Kankuro, behind her, smiled. “Of course.”
Gaara’s arms tightened just slightly around me. “Are you okay now?” he asked, voice soft.
I nodded. “Thank you.” I pushed away from him and stood, giving him my hand to help him up.
He raised a brow, but took my hand and let me help him up. “You’re welcome.”
I smiled slightly. “We seem to say that a lot.”
“Say what?”
“Thank you and you’re welcome.”
He smiled. “Yes, we do.”
“I guess that means you guys do a lot for each other,” Kankuro said.
I shrugged. “Friends do that,” I said, looking toward Kiba and Hinata. “Right?”
They nodded. “Of course!” Kiba said. “That’s what friends are for.”
Hinata smiled shyly. “Y-yea.”
Kiba’s arm slid around Hinata’s waist, making Hinata blush, when Gaara’s eyes flashed to him and I couldn’t help but think, Oh, wow! They are such a cute couple! They would be a cute couple. Definitely. Too bad Hinata liked Naruto.
I smiled up at Gaara. “Something you’ll soon see is normal.”
He smiled back. “Friends.”
“Friends.”
I caught the look on Temari’s face before she turned away. There was a smile, a glistening in her eyes, that said she was happy.
I reached my hand out to Temari. “Friends?”
She smiled. “Friends.” She took my hand.
I shook her hand. “Friends, then.”
Gaara smiled.
“I keep making friends,” I said, laughing. “Awesome.”
“You keep making friends because anyone who knows you instantly sees that you’re awesome.” Kiba beamed. “Anyone who gets to know you comes to find you intriguing. Am I right, Gaara?”
Gaara gave one small nod. “Yes,” he said softly.
I looked up at Gaara, smiling. “I’m strange, I know.”
“Not strange . . . merely unique.”
“Unique, strange, weird.” I shrugged. “Either way, I am me and there’s no changing that!”
He smiled slightly. “I hope not.”
I swayed mentally for a moment, then looked up at him, eyes torn and unsure. “Gaara?”
A wary look crossed his face. “Yes?”
“Can I . . . talk to you in private for a moment?”
He nodded once. Everyone went back into the building and we walked away from it a few meters. He stopped and turned to me, eyes cautious.
I paced for a few minutes, thinking. Finally, I’d gotten my nerve up and I stopped, facing him. He seemed tense and cautious, as if he was afraid of what I was going to say. “G-Gaara?”
He seemed to withdraw into himself again.
I stepped up in front of him, searching his eyes. “Why did you kiss me?” The question slipped from my mouth before I’d even thought it. It hadn’t been the question I’d planned to ask.
His eyes widened. He cocked his head to the side, thoughtfully. “I kissed you . . . because . . . I wanted to . . . I felt the need to.”
I stared at him questioningly.
A small smile. “You look cute when you’re confused.”
That made me blush and look away.
“I kissed you because I wanted to. I felt the need to do so.” He stepped up to me, reaching out with his arms to pull me into him with his arms around my waist. “I wanted to know what it felt like.”
My arms were between my chest and his, fingers curling around his shoulders. “But . . . I don’t understand.”
“What don’t you understand about it?”
“Why me?”
He raised one brow. “Have you seen me hanging out with any other girl?”
No. They were afraid of him. I shook my head.
“Have you seen me with anyone other than you?”
“No.”
“You’re the only friend I have, Star.” One arm tightened around my waist and he brought his other hand up to cup my chin. “You’re the only one to ever dance with me or touch me. Star, I don’t get to be touched like normal people. I don’t get to be smiled at or talked to. You’re the only one that I can dance with, the only one I can kiss or hug.” His eyes searched mine. “How can I dance, smile, talk with or kiss anyone else?”
“Yea, but that’s not a good enough reason. You don’t kiss someone just because-”
“That’s not the only reason, Star. I was telling you that you’re the only one I can kiss. I didn’t say that was the only reason I kissed you.” He smiled slightly. “I kissed you because . . . I wanted to. There’s no other explanation for that. Just like now.” He leant in and pressed his lips to mine.
I felt my shock boil inside me. I tried to pull away and he tightened his hand around my chin to hold me in place.
He pulled back. “You’re not seeing yourself the way I see you,” he said, releasing me.
I smiled. “You don’t see yourself the way I see you.”
“How do you see me?”
“I see you . . . as strong, wise. I see that you’re kinder than everyone’s made you out to be. I see that you’re an amazing guy, but that you’ve been hurt so much in the past that you’re afraid to let anyone inside to see the guy that I do. I know that if people weren’t so dense, they would know,” I smiled softly, “they would know that you’re not a monster, that you’re just . . . you.”
There was a look in his eyes that I didn’t understand. “Star. . . .” An instant later, I was being crushed to him. I didn’t even see him move. He was hugging me to him tightly, apparently not afraid I would break. “Thank you,” he said breathlessly.
“For what?” I gasped.
“For seeing me. . . .”
“Promise me something?”
“Anything.”
“Try to see yourself the way I see you.” I pulled away to meet his eyes. “At least try.”
He smiled just slightly. “I’ll try.”
That made me smile. “I would say thanks, but I think we say that too much, so instead, I’m just going to be happy about it.”
He gave a small nod. “Do you remember the clearing where we danced?”
I nodded. “Of course. Why?”
“Meet me there tonight,” he said, stepping away from me.
I smiled. “I will.” I watched him go back inside, looking around. For a moment, I let myself wonder Where the hell is Sasuke? before I turned and followed him inside. I stopped by Kiba, Akamaru and Hinata to hug them and shake Shino’s hand with a smile. I stopped by to hug Shika and Choji and kept going until I had hugged Neji and shook Tenten’s hand and gave Lee a hug. By the time I got back to my team, I could feel someone watching me, but before I could look around, Naruto had grabbed me in a hug.
“It’s okay, Star. We know you didn’t mean to do that,” he said. “And even if you did, the mess is all cleaned up now.”
When he pulled away, I glanced around to meet Gaara’s eyes. I smiled, waved.
A small smile, small wave.
“Wow, I can’t believe you made friends with him! He seems really cool.”
I smiled at Naruto. “He is. He’s just . . . kind of shy.”
“Introduce me to him when you get the chance,” Naruto said excitedly.
I looked over at Gaara, wondering. “Okay, I can introduce you now. There’s no problem with that.”
“Okay!”
“Wait, you’re going to go over there, Naruto? You’re going to get killed!” Sakura seemed to be worried about Naruto.
“He’s not going to be harmed. Don’t worry.” And we started off, walking toward Gaara quickly. He noticed us walking when we set out, eyes following us the closer we got to him. I stood feet from him, Naruto at my side. “Hi,” I said, smiling. “Long time no see, huh?”
He smiled. “Hi.”
“This is Naruto. He thinks you’re cool.”
Gaara met Naruto’s eyes coolly.
Naruto beamed. “Hi! I’m Naruto!”
For a moment, he didn’t respond and when he did, his voice was soft. “Gaara.”
“Great, now you’ve been introduced! Gaara, Naruto would like to become friends.”
His eyes flashed up to mine. “Friends.”
“Friends! I’d like to be friends!”
“Is he a friend of yours?”
“Yeah.”
He gave a small nod, indicating he would be friends.
I smiled, hugged him. “Great!”
Naruto held his hand out to Gaara.
Gaara looked at it.
“Um, Naruto, don’t,” I warned.
“Why?”
“If you try to touch him, you’ll get hurt,” Temari said simply.
His hand fell. “But she hugs him. . . .”
“She’s the only one who can touch him without getting hurt. It’s not something he can control. The sand protects him from everything,” Kankuro explained. “In all the time we’ve known him, she’s the only one that was able to get through the sand.”
“It’s nothing personal,” I quickly added. “Like they said, he can’t control it.”
Naruto beamed. “Well, okay, then, I won’t hold it against you! We’re friends, after all!” He glanced back at Sakura. “All right, I better get going! It’ll probably be my turn soon! At least, I hope so!” He chuckled. “I’m gonna Hokage, so I won’t lose!”
Gaara’s eyes widened slightly, barely noticeable.
I smiled. “You do that. Make friends for a minute. I’m going to stretch. My body is sore.” I moved away from them so I could do a back bend, all the way down to the floor, keeping my body stretched for sixty counts. When I straightened back up, everyone was staring at me. Ignoring them, I sat down and pulled my leg over my head, holding it, again, for sixty counts. I let it go and did the same with my other leg, looking up to see everyone watching me. “I said, talk, make friends.”
There was a grin on Kankuro’s face when he glanced at Gaara, who, unlike the other three, had no expression on his face whatsoever. Temari had a small smile and Naruto’s eyes were wide. The lack of expression on Gaara’s face made Kankuro shake his head and look back to me. I stretched my legs straight out in front of me, spread in an acute angle and reached my arms straight out, stretching until my nose touched the ground. I straightened back up and stood, stretching my back just slightly as I stood. “I’m done,” I sighed. “It felt good to be able to stretch.”
Kankuro leant over Gaara and whispered something I didn’t hear. It was then that a small blush flashed across his face and he looked away from me to glare at his brother darkly.
Kankuro held his hands up in defeat, or surrender, and backed away, the smile still on his face. “Hey, I just said what every other guy is thinking here.”
At this, Gaara’s eyes turned to Naruto, who was studiously looking at the ground. He slowly raised his eyes off Naruto to look around at every guy that was nearby. I looked with him to find every guy look away from me or him quickly and stare at the ground as his eyes caught them. It seemed everyone nearby had been staring at me and every one of them was terrified of meeting Gaara’s eyes. He walked slowly up to me, eyes taking in everyone around us, put his arm around my waist and pulled me into him to whisper, “I wouldn’t do that again,” in my ear softly enough nobody else would hear.
“Why?” I whispered back.
“I’d hate to have to kill every guy in this room to protect you,” was all he said. These words, unlike his last words, were harsher, loud enough that if anyone was listening for them, they would’ve heard him say it.
“What does that mean?” My voice was still soft.
“You don’t see yourself the way these guys in here do, Star, nor the way I see you. Just trust me when I say it’s not safe for you to do that in front of any of these guys.” These words were spoken softly.
I stared past him at Temari, eyes wide. “But-I don’t-”
“Do you trust me?” he asked.
I nodded. “You know I do.”
“Then just listen to me when I say it’s not safe for you to do that in front of anyone. Trust me when I tell you that there wasn’t one guy that didn’t have similar thoughts when you were stretching.”
He was too close for me to look up at him, but I so wanted to when I asked, “What about you?”
“I didn’t have those thoughts, no.”
“What thoughts did they have?”
“You’re better off not knowing. Just know I’m going to protect you, no matter the costs. As long as I’m around you, I’m not going to let anyone hurt you.”
The arm he had around my waist kept me unable to pull away enough to look up at him. “You didn’t have those thoughts?”
“Not until Kankuro mentioned them, no.”
“Is that why Kankuro and Naruto were grinning and you were just you?”
“Yes. They both had similar thoughts.”
“But you didn‘t.”
“No.”
I threw my arms around his waist, leaning into him. “Thank you.”
“For what?” He seemed amused, yet curious.
“For not thinking of me that way.”
He hugged back, gently, then pulled away, eyes locking on mine. “I don’t have those thoughts, Star. The only thoughts I have about you is keeping your friendship. I’ll do anything to that end.”
I smiled. “Same here.”
“You mean that, don’t you?”
I nodded. “Yes.”
He let me go, left hand trailing down my right arm to capture my hand in his. Even though we were nearly the same height, his hand was quite a bit larger than mine. “Then we know what we want.”
“Make no secrets, I’ll keep your friendship.” I grinned. “I always get what I want.”
That made him smile, almost made him laugh, I could see it in his eyes. “And my friendship is something you want?”
I nodded. “More than anything. Nothing will change that.”
“Temari told me about your conversation with her. I want you to know, you can talk with me like that any time you want.”
I smiled. “You know, that mind-to-mind connection gets stronger with the relationship. In a matter of months or maybe years, I’ll be able to talk mind-to-mind with you wherever you or I go.”
“That must be useful,” he said, smiling just slightly.
“I’ll let you know when it happens.” I winked.
Again, his eyes filled with laughter and he smiled. “When, not if.”
“Of course! As I said, I get what I want!”
“And the same goes for me and Kankuro,” Temari spoke up. “If you ever need to talk to any of us, you can. No matter where we are, you can speak with us. If you’re ever in trouble, I want you to contact one of us as soon as you can.” Her eyes were serious when she said that. “And if you get into trouble and had the opportunity to contact us and didn’t take it, I will personally kick your ass.”
I glanced at Gaara, wondering what he had to say about that, but he nodded. “I can’t because I promised not to hurt you, but I didn’t promise I would keep Temari from hurting you when you do something incredibly stupid.” He locked his eyes on mine. “If you get into trouble and you can contact us, but you don’t for one reason or another, whatever that reason is, I will let her carry through with her threat.”
I crossed my arms, pouted. “Ah, come on! I get in trouble a lot! Am I supposed to contact you every time?”
“Yes.”
Despite the fact I was trying to pout, his one-word answer made me smile. “Okay, fine. When I get in trouble, I’ll contact you at the soonest possible time, but just remember, there are times and conditions when I can’t contact mind-to-mind.”
“We’re fine with that, just contact us as soon as you can.”
“I don’t care how many days or months or years we go without seeing each other, Star. If you’re ever in trouble, you contact me as soon as you can.”
I met Gaara’s eyes and saw something new in them. Concern, worry. “I will. I promise, as long as you promise not to forget me.”
“I don’t see that happening.”
“My brother doesn’t forget,” Temari added.
I smiled. “Great. I don’t, either. If you forget me, I will personally fly to Suna and kick your ass.”
His eyes widened and a smile played upon his lips. “Fly?”
“I have wings. I can make it to Suna in a matter of hours.”
“Well, hell, if you can get there that fast, we’d better see you at least once a week!” Kankuro said.
I smiled. “Okay, I’ll visit once a week, if I’m allowed.”
“Always,” Gaara said.
“Hey, that reminds me. That move I gained from you? Do you think you can train me to use it?”
“I can try, as long as Temari and Kankuro stand in at all times.”
I hugged him. “Thanks. How long would it take me to learn it?”
He shrugged. “A week, maybe more.”
“Maybe you should come stay for a week, to learn faster,” Temari suggested, smiling.
Gaara’s lips turned up in a smile. “That’s a good idea.”
“If you can get Kakashi-Sensei to agree,” Naruto put in, “we can deal without you for a week.”
“You think?”
He nodded. “I’ll do even more work just to keep the team up.”
I shrugged. “I’d have to ask the Hokage, really. . . .”
“Go ask him, then! I’d bet he’d be willing to let you learn to control a dangerous move like that! I mean, really, who wants to be on the other end of that move if you lose control and use it again?! I know I don’t!” Naruto’s eyes were wide. “After all, it was an accident that you used it this time! Uh, right?”
I nodded. “Yea.”
“I say go for it,” a new voice from behind us said. We looked around us to see the Fourth Hokage. “I agree with young Naruto. It wouldn’t be good for you to lose control of it on your team mates or your Sensei. A week of training should get it done, correct?”
“Yes,” Gaara said, meeting the Hokage’s eyes with ease. “A week.”
“And you say you can fly there within hours, right?”
“Yes, I can.”
“Then within a week, I hope to see you back here. If you learn to control that move, you will make an incredible Ninja for the Leaf Village.”
I smiled slightly. “Thank you, sir.”
“After the Chuunin Exams end, I’ll let you return with the Sand Siblings to Suna, but you must be back in a week. We may have need of you.” There seemed to be some knowledge lurking in his eyes. “I’ll write a pass for you immediately.” With that, he turned and was gone.
Naruto squealed. “A week in Suna! That should turn out to be fun, right?!”
I nodded. “Yea.” I turned to look at the Sand Siblings. “Can you guys keep up with my wings, or will we be walking there?”
Gaara smirked slightly. “You have wings to fly with. I can use my sand to keep up.”
“And those two?”
“I can carry them alongside me.”
I smiled. “Okay, it’s settled, then.”
“It won’t take long to get there, will it?” Naruto asked. “I mean, she’ll be safe, right?”
“She’ll be safe. Nobody’s getting past Gaara to get to her.”
I shrugged. “I’ll be fine. I always come through in the end.”
“Be that as it may, I think I’ll accompany you back, as well.”
I turned to look at him. “That’s okay, Gaara, I’ll be fine.”
He studied me. “You sure?”
“You can accompany me halfway there, just to give me someone to talk to, but I’ll be fine the rest of the way.”
He gave a small nod. “Then that’s what I’ll do.”
“Don’t worry, I won’t get lost.” I smiled. “I’ve got a built-in radar!”
“Try to maintain contact with me until you’re unable to, just so I know you‘re fine.”
I nodded. “I will.”
“Then it’s all settled! Star’s coming home with us for a few days!” Kankuro seemed excited about this.
I smiled at him. “Yea. For a week.”
“Kankuro and I will sit in with the training, in case you need us.”
I smiled again. “That’ll be great. Maybe you and I will get a chance to train together.”
She nodded. “Any time.”
I looked over at Sakura, feeling her staring at me. “We should get back, Naruto. I think Sakura’s getting anxious.”
He nodded, following my eyes. “Yea, let’s go.” He look back at Gaara. “It was great meeting you! I guess I’ll see you again!” He started off quickly, waving.
I hugged Gaara before walking back to Sakura.
“He is really cool, but kind of scary,” Naruto said when we were back. “I thought he was going to rip everyone into shreds when he saw them staring at you!”
“He’s a little protective, yea, that’s true, but he’s a good guy.”
“He cares about you a lot.”
I shrugged. “I care about him, too.”
“So how did you two get to be friends?”
“He saved my life and I gave him cupcakes. That’s pretty much how that happened.”
“C-cupcakes?!”
I nodded.
“Cupcakes won over a guy like Gaara?!” Sakura’s eyes were wide.
“No, it wasn’t the cupcakes that won him over. It was the part where I wasn’t afraid of him.”
“How could you not be afraid of him?”
“How did he save your life?”
“I was being chased by someone and he killed them.” I shrugged. “And because he saved my life, I welcomed him into the life he saved.”
“He killed someone in front of you, but you gave him cupcakes?!”
“I think that’s why he didn’t know how to place me, why he followed me when I asked him to. I think because I didn’t freak out and run from him when I saw him kill that guy, he was confused and trying to figure out why I wasn’t afraid of him.” Again, a shrug. “And then I touched his arm, which caught him by surprise, and he found out that I was no threat to him.” I thought about my next remark before I said it. “I think . . . I think the reason he didn’t kill me is because I wasn’t afraid of him, but I didn’t try to hurt him. I think he was confused about what to do with me because I wasn’t afraid. I don’t think he knew exactly what to do about me.”
“So because you were straight forward with him after he killed someone, it confused him and he let his guard down,” Naruto said thoughtfully.
“Yea, I think so. I think that’s the only reason he didn’t just walk away or kill me.”
“So, what, in order to make friends with him, you have to let him kill someone in front of you and not freak out when the blood splatters on you?” Sakura looked sickened. “I couldn’t do that.”
“Actually, when he killed him, no blood got on me at all. Yea, there was a blood splatter, but it didn’t touch me. Not even a drop got on me.”
“Maybe he tried not to let the blood get on you,” Naruto suggested.
I shrugged. “Maybe. Maybe it was just luck.”
“Would you have freaked out if the blood had hit you?”
I shook my head. “No. I was already covered in my own blood, so what would’ve been the point of freaking?”
“I would’ve.” Sakura’s eyes were huge now.
I shrugged. “Blood doesn’t bother me.”
“I think Star’s right,” Sakura said, eyes vague and thoughtful. “About him not knowing what to make of her.”
“I’m not sure if anyone knows what to make of Star!” Kiba’s voice drifted over to us as he, Shino and Hinata walked over to us.
I looked over at Shino, smiling. “Hey.”
He gave a small nod.
I walked over to him. “Do you have lightning bugs? I love lightning bugs.”
He nodded again.
“I love lightning bugs. They’re so pretty.”
He held out one hand and in it there was a lightning bug.
I snatched it and ran away from him, holding and petting it. “It’s a girl and her name is Shion, to give Shino credit for her life.” I smiled up at him, kneeling on the floor with my new pet. “I love my little Shion.”
I couldn’t see the expression on Shino’s face, thanks to his head coverings and sunglasses, but I could feel both confusion and amusement flow from him.
“Like I said,” Kiba said, laughing, “nobody knows what to make of Star!”
“I don’t think anyone ever will,” Naruto said, staring at me. “She’s just so strange.”
I was sitting in a corner, petting a lightning bug. What’s so strange about that? Sandals came into my view. I looked up long legs, a leg wrapping and shorts to meet black, coolly amused eyes. I waved at him with the hand the lightning bug was not on. “Hi.” Then I curled into a ball, protecting my little Shion and said, “Mine.”
He smiled slightly, shaking his head and walking off a bit.
I stood up, walked over to Shino and held Shion out gently. “Protect her,” I said firmly. “Protect Shion.”
He held his hand out and I set her in his palm. “I’ll protect her.”
I smiled. “Bye, little Shion. Be careful.” I turned away, walked to Sasuke and smacked his shoulder. “Where were you?”
“Kakashi put a seal on the mark,” he said low enough so that nobody but me heard. “And Orrochimaru interrupted.”
I widened my eyes. “Are you okay?”
He nodded. “I’m fine.”
“You weren’t hurt?”
“Not at all.”
I let out a small breath. “Okay, I guess that’s good.” Then I frowned. “Although, maybe it would’ve been better if you had been hurt. Then it would do something to dampen that ego of yours!”
“I doubt it.” He stretched out his back slightly, twisting at the waist.
I had the urge to kick him in the shin. Badly. I fought it. Dammit. “You and that ego of yours. . . .”
He smirked. “Did you really think my ego would change just in one fight?”
I shrugged. “Honestly, no. And, actually, of all the people that have an ego like yours, you are the only one who deserves that ego.”
His eyes widened. “Ah, are we giving compliments now?” he teased.
I shrugged. “Just saying what’s true. You’re good at what you do.”
His eyes narrowed now. “Okay, what do you want?”
I grinned. “I don’t want anything. I’m doing something.”
His eyes turned cool. “And that would be?”
“I’m going to Suna for a week.” I smiled. “Don’t kill anyone.”
“You’re going . . . to Suna,” he said slowly, looking up and over my head at Gaara. “With them.”
“Yea, but there’s a really good reason behind it!” I said quickly, standing on tiptoes so he would see me instead of Gaara.
He slowly looked back to me. “And it would be . . . ?”
“Even the Fourth Hokage said it was a good idea,” Naruto said eagerly. “None of us wants her to accidentally use that move on us!”
“What move?” he asked suspiciously.
“Well, okay, so apparently I don’t just gain abilities through blood. I also gain them through energy. When he found me that day, he put his energy into me and I got one of his moves.”
“And . . . ?”
“And it’s a really dangerous and bloody move! If she lost control of it on one of us, we’d be goners, even if it was Kakashi-Sensei! That move is dangerous! The Fourth Hokage said that if she can master that move, she’d make a great Ninja, but while that move is running uncontrolled, she’s dangerous to us all so the only way to learn to control it is to train with the guy that she got it from, which is Gaara,” Naruto said it all in a huge rush. He didn’t even breathe. . . .
“I see.” He met my eyes. “Star, I’m going to accompany you there.”
I widened my eyes. “No, that’s not necessary!”
“I won’t go to Suna, but I’m going to go with you there and in a week’s time, I’m going to meet you halfway.” His eyes were dangerously hard when he said this.
“But-”
“Don’t,” he said simply. The tone alone let me know I’d lost the battle.
I couldn’t help but say one more thing. “But there’s one problem. You’ll slow us down.”
“How so?”
“I can fly. Gaara can carry the others there on flying sand. That way, we’ll only have a few hours to travel.”
A smirk slowly claimed his lips, filling his eyes well before his lips showed the smirk. “I thought you’d bring that issue up. . . .”
I cocked my head slightly to the left. “What?”
“You have wings, correct?”
I nodded.
“Your blood gives abilities that you possess, remember?”
“Yea, so?”
“I drink your blood, Star.”
I froze. “And?”
“If you really want to know, I’ll show you later, on the way to Suna.”
“But-”
“Star.”
I silenced.
“Anything else to say?”
I shook my head.
“Good, then we’ve agreed. I will be following you to Suna.”
“But, Sasuke-” A glare from Sasuke made Sakura quiet down instantly.
“You were saying?” he said evenly.
“Nothing.”
“Then it’s settled.”
I met his eyes, knowing that there wasn’t a damn thing I could say to change his mind. “Why? Why do you want to come so badly? You hate Gaara. You don’t like being near him.”
“Who said I’d be near him?” He smirked at the look on my face, so I must’ve looked as confused as I felt. “I said I was going to be following you. That means, I’ll be tailing you and Gaara to Suna, without him seeing me. I just want to be sure you make it there in safety.”
“I don’t . . . I’ll be fine. I always pull through. Besides, I’m strong.”
“Strong enough to take on Gaara? I saw the way you reacted when you felt his power, Star. He could just rip your channels wide open and make you pass out or swoon, whatever. Then what could you do to defend yourself?”
“He won’t attack me.”
“And how do you know that?”
“We’re friends.”
“Star, even his sister says he’s not the most stable of people. One slip, who knows what he’d do? And who knows whether or not they’re taking you away to kill you. You don’t know what he’ll do when there’s nobody to stop him.”
“I’ve been alone with him before.”
He gave me a hard look. “You’ve been alone with him inside the village, but you haven’t been alone with him outside the village.”
“I trust him.”
“You’re smarter than this, Star! Come on, you can’t possibly think that there’s no way he could hurt you. An accident, perhaps. Something that happens that he has no control over. What happens if he gets mad enough that he loses control? Who will stop him, then?” He took a deep breath. “Even if you are strong enough to stop him, which I’m not saying you are, that doesn’t mean he won’t hurt you in some way.”
“He’s not going to hurt me.”
“And how do you know that?”
I shrugged. “I just know, okay?”
“Star-”
“Do you trust me?”
He bit his lip for a minute, lightly enough not to draw blood. “Yes.”
“Then trust me when I say I’ll be fine. Trust me when I say he won’t hurt me. Okay? Just trust me here.” I met his eyes pleadingly. “Please. Just trust me on this.”
A moment of silence; he was thoughtful. “Fine. But I’m still following you.”
“That’s fine, I’m okay with that. Just trust me on this. You’re my friend, right?”
A small nod.
“Friends stand behind each other on their decisions.”
He crossed his arms, fingers on his left hand tapping his upper arm as he thought it over. “Friends stand behind each other’s decisions,” he said finally. “Fine.”
“I’ll be back in a week. It’s the only thing I can do, Sasuke. You didn’t see that move. You weren’t here to see it. You didn’t see the blood fly or the body or the skin-you didn’t see any of it. I did, okay? I did.” I could feel that my eyes were wide. “I saw it. I did it. I couldn’t . . . I couldn’t live with myself if I messed up and used that move on you or Naruto or Kiba or Hinata or even Sakura. I can’t control that. If I mess up and use it on someone I care about, or one of the Sensei’s or even the Hokage, what would happen, then?
“If I stay here without being trained to use that move, that’s exactly what will happen. I’ll lose control of it again and I’ll use it on you or someone else I care about and I don’t want to take that chance! You didn’t see it. You didn’t hear the scream or get splattered in blood. You didn’t smell it. But I did! Everyone in this room saw it. Everyone in this room heard him scream and I couldn’t stop it.” I covered my eyes with my hands. “I couldn’t stop it. Oh, God, the blood got everywhere and he was screaming and I tried to stop it, but it just went on.” I shook my head, still holding my hands over my eyes. “I don’t know what I’d do if it happened again to someone I care about.” I lowered my hands, looking up at him as I did. “You didn’t see it.”
His arms dropped slowly and his eyes widened slightly as he took a step toward me. “Star. . . .”
“It was horrible,” I said, looking through him, not at him. “It was bloody and messy and I didn’t mean to do it. It was the second time I did it on accident. The first time wasn’t so bad because I was protecting the team, but the second time . . . it was horrible because I wasn’t protecting anyone. I just . . . It wouldn’t have been so bad had it been on purpose, but it was on accident. I killed someone and it wasn’t even on purpose.” When my eyes were focused on him again, his eyes were softer, expression solemn, thoughtful.
“Star, I’m sorry.”
“For what?”
“For not being here.”
“It’s not your fault.”
“That doesn’t mean much to me. I’m sorry that you went through that alone. I’m sorry that you’re forced to make this decision. I’m sorry that you feel like this. But you can’t let it get to you. If he could’ve, he would’ve killed you, too. You were just better and faster than he was. It’s a survival game, Star. He would’ve killed you if you hadn’t killed him first.” He reached out slightly, putting his hands on my upper arms, cupping his fingers around them. “This is a game of survival. You were just stronger. Don’t hate yourself for surviving.”
“I don’t hate that I killed him. That’s not the part I care about.”
“Then what is?”
I looked down. For a moment, I didn’t answer.
“Star?”
“It’s just . . . the thought that I could lose control and use that move on Kiba,” I glanced over at him, “or Hinata, or Shino, or Shika or Neji--or even you. What if I lost control of it? Who could stop me from killing whoever it is that I reached for?” I brought my hands up to stare at the palms. “Who could stop that move?”
“I believe I have something that might help,” Kakashi-Sensei’s voice broke in. A pair of black, fingerless gloves were handed to me.
I took them, staring at them for a minute, then looking over Sasuke’s shoulder at Kakashi-Sensei.
“I don’t know if it’ll really help, but it’ll at least give you a feeling of control. Sometimes it’s the feeling of control that’s needed.”
I nodded mutely, slipping my hands into the gloves. They were a little large, but they fit fine. I looked up to see a smirk on Sasuke’s face. “What?”
“I never realized just how small your hands are.”
I glared up at him. “So?”
Naruto had to chime in at that time. “He’s right! You do have small hands!” He stared at his own hands for a minute. “Wow! You know, I’m shorter than you are and my hands are bigger!”
I glared at him.
“It’s a sign,” Sasuke said quietly.
“Of what?” I snapped.
“That you’re going to remain short.”
I glared at him. “I’m not short. I’m taller than Naruto and a lot of the girls.”
“But you’re shorter than I am and the size of your hands says that you won’t grow much more.”
“So, what, having small hands means what?”
“That you’ll be small.”
“I’m not small! And neither are my hands!”
His fingers closed around my left wrist and he brought my hand up to press his palm against my palm. My fingertips came halfway between the tips of his fingers and his top knuckles. “You were saying?”
“Let me see!” Naruto hurriedly said, coming forward. When Sasuke’s hand moved away, he put his hand up against mine. My fingertips were just slightly below his. “Wow! You do have small hands!” He looked up at Sasuke. “Does that mean I’ll be taller than she will be?”
He nodded.
I glared at both of them. “I’m going to compare my hands with Gaara’s, then,” I growled.
“Go ahead,” Sasuke said slowly. “But Naruto and I will tag along.”
I whirled away and ran over to where Gaara stood, with the two of them trailing. “Gaara!”
He met my eyes, eyes widening. “Star?”
I stopped in front of him and the other two caught up, Naruto running and Sasuke just walking. I held my hand out flat, palm pointed toward him. “Put your hand against mine.”
He obliged, holding his hand against mine. I could see his fingertips over mine. His hands were smaller than Sasuke’s, but bigger than Naruto’s and bigger than mine.
I growled, crossed my arms.
“Star? Are you okay?” he asked, eyes widening more.
“Your hands are bigger and you’re the same height I am!”
A smile tried to push its way across his face, but he looked too worried to let it. “And?”
“Sasuke says that my hand size says that I’ll be small. I’m not small, am I?”
He looked down, away, refusing to answer.
“Gaara?” I walked around him, trying to get a good look at his face. When I did, my eyes widened.
He had his hand pressed to his mouth and he was chuckling very softly. When he looked up at me, his lips were twisted in a grin wider than any I’d seen on his face before. “You’re small, Star.”
“But I’m taller than Naruto!” I defended.
He held his hand out.
I reluctantly placed my hand against his. “Your point?”
“Your hands are smaller than mine.” He let his hand drop. “You’re shoulders are wide, but smaller than mine or Naruto’s. Your feet are small,” he said, looking down for a moment. “And your ears are small. Everything about you is small.”
I crossed my arms, pouting, looking over at Temari. “Help?”
She was laughing softly, too. Kankuro burst out in laughter. “You’re small,” they both said.
“I am not small! I’m taller than Naruto!”
“You may be taller than Naruto,” Sasuke said softly, “but he’s got wider shoulders, bigger hands and feet and he’s just bigger than you are.”
“This isn’t fair. You’re all ganging up on me!”
Naruto laughed. “I’m going to be taller than Star!”
I glared at him. “You watch. I won’t be short or small.”
“You will be,” Kankuro said. “You’re going to be tiny.”
“But what about Gaara? He’s the same size!”
Gaara looked pointedly at his hands. “My hands are bigger, my feet are bigger and I’m taller than you are.”
I growled. “I won’t be small! I’ll grow, you all watch!”
He chuckled. “You’re going to be small.” A voice called out that it was Gaara’s turn to fight. He looked over at me, gave a small nod, face solemn. “I’ll be back shortly.” He turned and left.
I stared after him, then turned to glare at Sasuke. “This is your fault,” I growled.
“How so?”
“You brought up this subject!”
“He’s right, though,” Kankuro said.
“That’s not fair! Would somebody agree with me?!”
They all mutely shook their heads.
I growled.. “You’re all evil,” I mumbled. I glared up at Naruto. “You’re smaller than I am. You could at least try to agree. Or pretend.”
“Not if I’ll get to be taller than you! I don’t want to be short!”
I crossed my arms tightly, pouting, walking off. I quickly went outside, sitting a few feet from the door.
Someone sat beside me. I didn’t look over, but I knew who it was before he spoke. “Being small isn’t bad, Star.”
“To you, maybe. You’ve always been the taller one.”
“Not always,” he said softly.
“Okay, fine, but why do I have to be the small one?”
“Because you’re just small.”
“What the hell do you eat to make yourself taller?”
He laughed. “It’s not what I eat, Star. My Clan members are known to be tall.”
“My dad was tall,” I said.
“Was your mom?”
I froze. “I-I . . . I don’t remember my mom. . . .”
He looked over at me at that, one brow raised. “But you remember watching her being killed.”
“Yea, but I don’t remember what she looks like or what she sounded like . . . I don’t remember my mom.”
“You remember your father.”
I nodded. “My father was always the one who stood up for me to Kartwer. He protected me and defended me and taught me to be strong. I don’t know . . . I guess my dad was my favorite. My dad was the one that always let me get my way. My mom always wanted to put me in pink fluffy gowns and do embroidery class and-”
He chuckled.
“What?” I demanded.
“You, in something pink and fluffy.” He chuckled again. “It’s just a funny image.”
I turned my head to glare at him.
He shrugged. “Just is.”
I shook my head, looking away. “Anyway, my dad always let me wear pants and shorts and fight and he didn’t make me put my hair up and he didn’t try to teach me things I didn’t want to learn.”
“So your mom tried to turn you into something you weren’t, but your father accepted you.”
I nodded. “I miss my dad. . . .”
“More than your mom?”
Again, I nodded. “I know that sounds horrible, but . . . I can’t help but think that if I had been left with my mom, I’d be a girl.”
“You are a girl.”
“You know what I mean. I mean, a ‘pretty-in-pink,’ ‘puffy dress’ kind of girl. You know, like Sakura or Ino.”
He grimaced.
“But my dad would never have made me be that. He would’ve let me fight and cuss and do what I do now. He would’ve trained me to use my eyes, but my mother never would’ve been able to do that. So I guess my dad was always my favorite.” I shook my head, put my hand to my forehead and shaking my head. “Oi, I don’t know why I just told you all that. That was stupid. . . . You probably think I’m retarded. . . .”
“I don’t think you’re retarded, Star.”
“Even after I just said all that?”
He shrugged. “Even after.”
“Why?”
“Everyone needs someone to talk to every now and then.”
I turned to look up at him. “You don’t.”
“You’d be surprised.”
“I’ve never seen you anything but strong.”
“Funny,” he said softly. “Sometimes when I’m around you, I don’t feel strong. . . .”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means sometimes you make me feel unsure.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know.” His voice was softer when he said that. “But you do.”
“You don’t seem weak.”
“Sometimes I feel it.”
“Just around me?”
“No, not just.”
“Why around me, then?”
“I ask myself that all the time.”
“If you feel weak sometimes, why don’t you just talk to someone?”
He scoffed. “And who would I talk to? Star, in case you haven’t noticed, I don’t hang around a lot of people. Besides, it’s not like I need to.”
I scooted closer to him, hugging him softly around his waist. “Sometimes talking to someone helps.” I let go before he could hug back or push me away or even react.
He stared at me. “You just hugged me.”
I shrugged. “Don’t let it go to your head. In case you haven’t noticed, I hug a lot of people.”
“No you don’t. I’ve only seen you hug Kiba, Hinata and Gaara. And now me.”
“So?”
He put his arm around my shoulders, pulling me into his side. “Why did you pull away so fast?”
“I didn’t want to be pushed away or lit on fire.”
He scoffed. “I wouldn’t do that.”
“Oh, hell, yea, right! You would so do that!”
“Okay, I would, but not to you.”
“Oh, what would you do? Throw me off a cliff?” I turned my head to look up at him. “Stab me? How’s that better tha-”
I didn’t even see him move. There was no “suddenly” or even a blur. It was just one second, I was talking. The next moment, he had cupped his palm around my chin, holding me in place as his lips moved softly against mine.
I stiffened, eyes widening in shock. It was like time had skipped. I hadn’t seen him move or felt him move me. It just had skipped from me talking to this. I watched his eyes drift closed and my own eyes followed seconds after as I relaxed into the kiss.
His hand slowly moved up my jaw line, touching the hollow behind my ear gently, accidentally. When I drew in a breath, his hand moved to my ear, touching the lobe gently, running his nail up and down the edge of my ear.
I relaxed into him, placing my hand at his jaw lightly. The motion of his nail on my ear made my body relax, melt, into the kiss and I just lost my shyness and my inhibitions. I kissed back, for the first time.
His hand stayed in place for a few minutes, then wondered down, around to the nape of my neck, fisting in the hair there. I could feel him tense and a moment later, I was wrenched from him, forced to the ground, flat. He stared down at me, smirking, then lowered down to put his lips to mine. Before, he’d been gentle, soft, now he was more rough. He nipped at my lower lip, softly, but not gentle.
I had my hand against his jaw, cupping lightly, and I still kissed back, but my movements were lost to his.
He leant closer to me, lips moving determinedly against mine. His hand moved back to my ear, running his fingernail down the edge. It made me go limp again. It took me by surprise when I felt him flick his tongue across my lower lip. It made me gasp and he ventured into my mouth, exploring gently and with a light touch, gaining in confidence as seconds ticked by and he caressed the inner lining of my lips, my tongue. He drew back slightly, still close enough that his lips touched mine gently.
I opened my eyes slowly to see his already open, dark and lazy, satisfied. It was that look that made me blush. I looked away, turning my head as I did so.
He pressed his lips to the edge of my jaw lightly, then used his hand to move my face back toward him and lightly played his lips against mine. After a moment, he pulled back, sitting up straight.
I stayed where I was, staring at him with wide eyes. “W-what was that about?” I stammered, voice breathy and soft.
He chuckled. “You asked what I would do if you hugged me. I simply answered.”
That wasn’t an answer! I wanted to say that, oh, so badly, but the look he gave me quelled any such words in me and I looked away, blushing. I sat up slowly, avoiding his eyes.
“And you keep saying you’re not shy.”
That comment made my blush darken. “O-okay, on some instances, I’m a little shy. So?”
“You, Star, are more than a little shy.”
“Y-your point?”
“No point. Just stating that you’re shy.” A moment passed and he turned to smirk at me. “And I find it cute.”
That made the almost gone blush flare back to life and I looked away again.
“Oh, and, hey, by the way, I like it when you kiss back,” he added offhandedly.
I could feel the blush deepen. “I-I didn’t. . . .”
“Oh, yes, you did.” He chuckled again. “Very hesitantly, but you did kiss back.”
“I’m going back inside.” Even to me, it sounded sulky. I stood, avoiding his eyes.
He laughed, stood. “Let’s go back in, then, if you’re ready.” His voice said that I wasn’t ready.
“Why wouldn’t I be?!” I demanded, whirling to face him. The moment I met his eyes, I looked away and blushed again.
“Because you’re still blushing,” he said, stretching his back out. “I thought you’d want to wait until you’re not blushing anymore.”
“I-I-” I growled, stomped my foot in annoyance, crossing my arms. All of which seemed to greatly amuse him and he laughed. “It’s not funny!”
“I think it is.”
I glared at him, but I could the blush returning so I looked away.
“You blush easily,” he commented, crossing his arms and looked up at the sky. “It’s cute.”
I blushed darker. I could feel it. “Why are you doing this!?”
He looked back down at me, eyes glittering with laughter. “I find it amusing.”
“Please stop making me blush? Please?”
“I’m not making you do anything.”
“Please?”
He sighed, rolled his eyes. “Fine. I’ll restrain myself from doing anything to make you blush.”
“Thank you.” I sighed, closed my eyes and worked on centering myself. After I felt more secure, I opened my eyes, dared to glance up at him. I felt a small blush, but nothing more and I sighed again. “I’m ready.”
“You’re still blushing.”
“How badly?”
“You’re pale, Star. It’s visible.”
I growled again. “It’s as good as it’s going to get. Let’s go.”
He gave a small nod, lips turning up just slightly.
“This isn’t funny, Uchiha.”
“Yeah, actually, it is.”
I glared at him.
He shrugged. “Sorry, but it is funny.”
“You’re not sorry.”
He smirked. “No, I’m not.”
I turned away. “Let’s go.” I quickly made my way inside, walking as far ahead of him as I could. Which, apparently, wasn’t very far. . . . By the time I’d gotten back to my team, Gaara had been back with his siblings for a seemingly long time. I smiled over at him, waving. He waved back and I turned to find Sakura glaring at me. “What?” I asked.
She shook her head, looked away. “Nothing.”
I looked over at Naruto. “What’s wrong with her?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. When I came back over here, she was like this.”
“I’m fine,” she snapped. “So stop asking.”
Naruto shrugged again, mute now.
I reached out with my mind, wondering what I’d missed. I felt no such inhibitions about going into her mind. Besides, what was bothering her was right in the front of her mind, for all and any to see. It was a memory. One I’d just lived and she’d just witnessed. The memory made my blush flare to life and I looked away, down, letting my hair cover the blush.
“Star?” Naruto asked. I heard him move closer.
I shook my head. “I’m fine,” I said.
A hand touched my shoulder. I looked up to meet Sasuke’s eyes. “Don’t worry about it,” he said simply.
“But she saw-”
“I don’t care what she saw.”
“But-”
“Star, why does this bother you?”
I closed my eyes. “I just . . . I don’t . . . I know it shouldn’t, but it does. . . .”
“If it bothers you, you shouldn’t have done it!” Sakura said.
“Sakura,” Sasuke said, turning toward her for a moment, “this is between me and her. Not you.”
“This isn’t right! You defend her, but-”
“Sakura!” Naruto said angrily. “Stop it! This is ridiculous! Why are you being like this?”
“Because she’s a backstabber!”
“What did she do that’s so bad? This is still our team! She didn’t betray the team.”
“She didn’t betray anyone,” Sasuke said quietly. “Sakura’s just angry that she wasn’t the one in Star’s position.”
Sakura glared at me. I couldn’t see her, but I could feel her glare. “She’s not so special. She doesn’t have a family or money or even a house of her own.”
I glared at her now. “Where do you think I live, Sakura? I have my own house.”
“I’ve heard all about you. I know your house was given to you only because the Hokage felt bad for you because your family deserted you.”
I glared at her.
“Oh, I know all about that. All about how the Hokage is the only reason you were let in this village. You came here when you were five, right? Ran into him. He practically gave you the house you’re living in and the clothes you wear and the food you eat. Without him, where would you be, Star? Not so great now, are you?” She took a deep breath. “You don’t have anywhere to go. No family. Nothing to take care of yourself with. What do you have? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.”
I could feel the tension rolling from Sasuke as he took all that in. “Star, is what she said true? Any of it?”
I took two steps up to her, drew my fist back and punched her. Hard. She spun once around and dropped and I whirled and ran from the building. I seemed to be running a lot lately. I could hear someone running after me and I pushed my speed higher, forcing myself to run faster. When I had felt I’d gone far enough, I whirled and found myself facing Sasuke. He stepped over a bush carefully, using his arm to shield his face as he broke through branches of a lower tree. “Star-”
I punched him, hard enough he stumbled, but he didn’t fall. “How stupid can you be? Can’t you see she’s right about me?! Why the hell did you follow me out here?!”
He raised his hand and brushed the blood from his lip with his wrist. “Why wouldn’t I?”
I raised my fist again. “Go back, Uchiha, or I’ll punch you again!”
“I’m not afraid of you.” He stepped toward me.
“I hit you the first time. I’ll do it again.”
“I let you hit me the first time. The second time, you won’t be so lucky.”
“Yeah, right!” I pulled my fist back, aimed and-
He caught my fist before it hit him, catching my second hand as I raised it to slap him. Using my wrists, he pulled me into him, stepping closer to me when I dug my heels in and refused to move.
“Let go!” I growled, struggling to get my hands back.
He let go with one hand, but before I could free myself, he had both arms around me, arms trapped within the circle of his arms. “Look at me.”
I looked away.
“Star, look at me.” One arm tightened around me and he brought one hand up to force my face toward his. His fingers tightened around my chin when I fought him. “Stop it. Now.”
I growled at him, moving so that my hair fell in front of my eyes.
“Dammit,” he growled back. “Don’t fight me, Star! You’ll lose.”
“Just go back! Why is that so hard?! Can’t you see, you chose the wrong girl!”
“Tell me,” he said harshly. “Tell me you don’t want me. Tell me you don’t like me.” I started to say that, but he went on. “But lie to me, Star, and I swear I will make you pay for it!”
I clamped my mouth shut at that, glaring at him, letting my eyes say what I could not.
“Well? Nothing to say?” When I said nothing, he went on to say, “I will only leave you alone when you tell me you don’t want me. I don’t give a damn about what anyone else in this world thinks, Star! It’s me and you. Period. If you tell me you don’t want me, if you tell me that I’m not good enough, then I will leave you alone. But if you tell me you’re not good enough, dammit, then I’ll spend the rest of my life proving to you that you are. Do you hear that? Tell me, tell me right now whether you think I’m good enough for you. Not the other way around. Don’t say that you’re not worth it. Don’t say you’re the wrong girl. You are not the one who comes to that decision. I am and I have made that choice! Now it’s your turn. Tell me I’m not good enough. Tell me I don’t have what you need, what you want. Tell me that right now and it all ends. But hold back, Star, and it continues. This is your last chance.”
“Why are you doing this?”
“I didn’t say you could ask questions. I said you are to tell me whether you think I’m enough for you.”
I took a deep breath. “Okay, fine! Yes, I think you’re good enough. I think you’re perfect. But-”
“No, no withdrawal. You’ve said it. It’s over.”
I struggled against him again. “Don’t do this, you idiot! Choose someone else!”
“Stop fighting this! I will choose as I see fit and the more you fight this, the more I’m going to put the pressure on you. I am not choosing someone else. I’ve made my choice! And you’ve made yours. This is it, Star. I said that was your last chance. I meant it. I am not giving you a second chance to run from me. You can fight this all you want. It won’t do a bit of good. Now you can either submit and drop your barriers or I can force them down, but either way, it’s happening.”
I stared up at him. “What is?” I whispered.
“Do you remember when you let your channels wide open?” I nodded and he said, “Do it again.”
I shook my head. “No.”
“Why?”
“Because I want to know what you’re going to do.”
“You can either fight me, or give in. Fighting me will make it drag on longer. If you give in, it’ll be over quickly.”
“What will?”
“I’m going to mark you.”
“M-mark?”
“Drop your barriers, Star. Here and now. Or I’m ripping them wide open.”
I shook my head. “What barriers?”
“All of them.”
“I can-can’t drop them all!”
“Drop them or I’m ripping them wide open. Your choice.”
“You can’t rip them open.”
He smirked. “If you think that, fine.”
A moment later, I nearly screamed. It was painful. I felt something inside me shatter, burn. My eyes closed and I fought it, trying to protect myself from whatever was happening, but fighting it only encouraged it. The burning intensified and I bit my lip to keep from crying out. All I could see was blackness, black eyes, when I opened my eyes.
“Drop your barriers, Star, and the pain ends. Just drop them. I don’t want to hurt you.”
I nodded mutely and all at once, my barriers dropped. The pain faded, but the burning feeling stayed. It just wasn’t painful. Whereas before it burnt, it now left a warmth behind, a tingling feeling that was both comforting and safe. I was still seeing his eyes, but now there was no pain behind it. I reached up to place my mouth softly to his, feeling no fear or shyness as I did so.
I could feel his lips turning up in a small smile and he quickly took control of the kiss, turning it so that his power forced into me and he pulled my power out, into him. His power reached into the deepest parts of me, invading my memories, my feelings, everything that was once private he now knew. The double-edged sword to that was my power did the same thing. Everything that had once been private to him was now part of me. Feelings, fears, wants, desires, dreams, memories. Neither one of us could keep the other from our deepest secrets now.
A memory flashed through my head, one I’d never seen before, yet I knew it was mine.
I ran from the house, crying, screaming, “Big Brother!” and a voice called weakly back. I turned and ran to the right side of my home to find my brother, bloodied, torn and barely alive. He looked up at me. “Big Brother,” I whimpered, kneeling beside him. “What can I do to help?”
He shook his head limply. “I am dying, Star. You must leave and never return to this place.”
“I can’t leave you!”
“You never will.” He weakly lifted one hand, but it dropped back down and he coughed. “Take the last of what blood I have left, Star. It’ll keep you nourished for days to come. If you don’t, you’ll never make it.”
“I won’t do that!”
“You’ve no choice.” He coughed again. “I’m dying, Star. Do this last thing for me. I beg of you.”
I shook my head. “No! I won’t!”
“Listen to me! Do you want Father to die in vain?! He died so that you would live! If you don’t listen to me, then his death will be for nothing! You love father, right? Then do as he wishes! Take what I have to offer so that I may live through you, so that my death won’t be in vain. Starlight, all of this, every death, every bit of this is for you. Drink of my essence, take what you can, and leave and never return here!”
“But this is my home!”
“No it’s not! Not anymore! This place is home to nobody, especially not to you! Do you want to die here!? Do you want to make Father upset with you?!”
I shook my head.
“Then do as I say! Drink what I have left and go, never to return.”
I was crying as I lifted his wrist to my lips. “Big Brother,” I said, biting down. I drank until there was nothing left, but still I felt there was room. I let his wrist fall and I shook his lifeless shoulder. “Big Brother?”
No reply.
I whimpered and crawled backward, bumping into someone’s leg. I jumped to my feet, looked up. I was short enough I could see up and into the cloak of the man that stood behind me. I screamed, turned and ran in the opposite direction. Every time he walked passed me, I would hide someplace, keeping my voice and energy silent as I had been taught. The games of hide-and-seek all seemed to have a point to me. I knew how to hide. I knew if I was careful, he wouldn’t find me. So I kept hidden. . . .
I broke from the memory, held tight to someone’s heart. My cheeks were wet with tears, eyes sore. “I-I killed my brother.” I had collapsed and the only thing keeping me up was him. “I did it. I-I killed him.”
His arms tightened around me. “Star, I-”
“I killed him. It wasn’t the murderer after all. I kill him.” I kept saying that.
He shook me, hard. His eyes were determined. “Star! Listen to me!”
I snapped to attention, staring up at Sasuke.
“I know that you feel horrible right now, but he told you to do it. Think about it the way he said it. Would you rather have let your father’s death be in vain or would you rather have died?”
“I-it makes sense, but I killed him. Big Brother . . . Oh, my God, how could I-”
He put his hand against my mouth. “Yes, fine, you did it, but would you have let your father die in vain? You father and your mother died to protect you. If he hadn’t done that, they would’ve died in vain. They’re deaths would mean nothing because you would be dead or captured. He died to protect you. He was dying anyway! You can’t let this memory slow you!”
“But-”
“Listen to me. I know how you feel, okay? I know you’re scared and ashamed and you feel like a monster, but you’re not. Star, you were a toddler still! You did what your brother had ordered you to do and he did what your father ordered him to do. You both carried out orders from those above you to get the same result: you, alive. Are you going to let them die for nothing or are you going to live with pride and let them know that you honor them and respect them?”
I shook my head, clearing it. “Okay, yea, you’re right. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. Just remember what their goal was. Okay?”
“Yea.” I hugged him, forcing my legs to hold me again. “Thank you. Thank you, really.”
He held me to him, tight. “Don’t say thank you. I did what I needed to do. I’ve got my satisfaction from it.”
I pulled away to look up at him. “What did you do?”
“I forged a bond with you, marked you.”
“How long will it last?”
“Forever.”
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Bloody Tears