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Criminal	By : laurenloogie Category: Naruto > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 1431 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
- 1-massacre
- 2-ruthless
- 3-tsukiyomi
- 4-obvious
- 5-barracks
- 6-bind
- 7-luck
- 8-heat
- 9-break
- 10-grief
- 11-thin
- 12-creep
- 13-switch
- 14-rant
- 15-battles
- 16-capture
- 17-undisclosed
- 18-drugs
- 19-snake
- 20-infiltration
- 21-color
- 22-escape
- 23-used
- 24-possession
- 25-cold
- 26-trap
- 9
- 10
- 11
"I really want to know what happened to Kisame," Deidara said for about the millionth time in the past day.
"And I really want you to shut up," Sasori growled, his voice distorted by Hiruko. "Like I keep saying, you can ask him when you see him."
"But what if he, I dunno... dies?" the blonde insisted, his sandals crunching through a patch of dry leaves.
"Then you can ask his corpse what happened," Sasori stated bluntly. "Honestly, if you don't shut up, you'll be the one who dies."
"Holy shit, what's it like to be such an asshole?" Deidara snapped. He winced as he stubbed his toe on a root and bit back a curse when he saw that the puppetmaster had noticed. Even through Hiruko's expressionless face, he could sense his partner's dry amusement.
Ever since their weird, sex-charged fight, the two had been trying hard to endure eachother's company, masking full-on rage with dry insults and sarcasm. On the outside, their behavior was almost exactly like it had been before... but there was a tension just under the surface, pulled tight and threatening to snap like a badly tuned guitar string. Whether it would eventually manifest itself in a violent fight or an angry wrestling match of a fuck, neither man was quite sure.
The only thing certain about the near future was that something shitty was bound to happen when they paired up with Itachi and Kisame in the Tea Country - it made their current problems pale in comparison. What if Hidan was right? Deidara lamented. If Itachi was the one who did that to Kisame, I'm gonna fuckin' kill him! He felt weirdly protective of the swordsman, despite the fact that he was inferior in strength and at least a foot shorter. If I could have been there, whoever beat him up would be in a million pieces, he raged, hands clenching into fists at his sides. He had been obsessing over Kisame's battered appearance ever since the meeting - remembering the swordsman's swelled shut eye and bandaged wounds made his heart pound and his blood boil. He literally felt like he was going to explode.
"Ugh, you're doing it again," Sasori growled, cutting off Deidara's heated train of thought.
"Doing what?" the blonde snapped, his face hot.
"Getting all worked up in your head," the puppeteer stated. "You realize clenching your fists and grating your teeth isn't helping anyone, right? All it's doing is pissing me off."
"Well... too bad," Deidara hissed. "I can't help it... so just deal with it."
"Think about something else, will you?" Sasori urged. "Like... how your stunningly attractive partner gives amazing hand jobs."
"Who, you?" the blonde said dryly. He made an apathetic gesture and said, "Eh... It was mediocre at best, hmm?"
Hiruko's tail flicked from side to side, a sign that the redhead within was annoyed. "I guess mediocre handjobs make you cum like a geyser, then," he growled, the statement sounding ridiculous in Hiruko's rumbling voice.
"Damnit, Sasori," Deidara sighed. "Don't talk about sex with me while you're wearing that hideous thing. You know it makes me uncomfortable."
"That's why I'm doing it," Sasori replied. He made the puppet's teeth chatter and its tail wag back and forth. "Come on sexy, let me ravage you," he chided.
"Ugh, knock it off!" Deidara exclaimed, an unwanted grin tugging the corners of his lips. "That is so disgusting!"
"You know you want it," the puppet rumbled.
* * *
After traveling at a grueling speed for a day and a half, Kisame allowed himself some time to rest. He had finally gotten past the barren flats of the Land of Earth, and was grateful for the thick grass that now covered the ground. There were a few small groves of trees here and there - he stopped in the midst of of one and sat down at the base of a maple.
"Here you go," he mumbled to Samehada, unraveling its bindings so it could scoot around in the grass. The sword was relaxed and almost comically blissful, happy just to be alone with its master. It had been edgy and fitful in the village, probably afraid that a stranger was going to attack after what Itachi had done to them. Now it showed no signs of distress as it shimmied through the tall grass - it had likely forgotten about the incident altogether.
The same couldn't be said for Kisame. Nightmarish memories of the other night flashed through his mind as he tended to his injuries, applying the nurse's salve to his frostbite and carefully rewrapping the blackened extremities with fresh bandages. He had lost a few nails already and patches of dead skin were beginning to peel away, exposing raw flesh. It was gruesome to endure but he was set on healing naturally, afraid that his rage towards Itachi would diminish with the wounds. He knew that it was a sick mindset - holding onto anger like this was unhealthy and dangerous - yet he didn't want to let go of it, not even for a second. Perhaps he was afraid that when the anger faded, it would be replaced with something even worse. He vaguely remembered someone telling him once about the process of grief. There was denial, anger, maybe guilt... and a bunch of other stages he had forgotten. It ends with acceptance, he told himself. Maybe that's what I'm afraid of... I don't ever want to accept this.
Once his frostbite was attended to, he tilted back his head and rinsed out his injured eye with an antiseptic solution. The chance it could get infected was fairly high, so he'd been keeping it covered with his headband. It twitched painfully as he doused it with the solution and the sunlight was too bright on his sensitive retina. It gave him a mild satisfaction to know that Itachi was nursing an equally painful shiner, not to mention his and Samehada's respective bite wounds. But it's not enough, he seethed. I wish he was disfigured beyond recognition! Sighing, he tried to stifle his rage as he capped the antiseptic and put it back in the bag. These emotions are going to get me killed, he told himself bleakly. Or worse, Deidara.
He pulled out a loaf of bread, making himself eat a few bites. He'd never had much of an appetite - he was known for picking at his food more than eating it - but it had dwindled even more since the incident, seeming to actually get worse as time passed. It made his stomach clench involuntarily every time he put something in his mouth, and he kept gagging with revulsion while he tried to swallow, unable to push away the thought of Itachi's cock down his throat. The fact that he'd been kicked repeatedly in the stomach might be a contributing factor, but he wasn't sure. He forced himself to keep down the bit of bread, fighting a strong urge to vomit. Itachi, you bastard! he raged, his mouth and eyes watering.
After the waves of nausea subsided, he took a short nap before continuing the journey. It did little to restore him, though - he dreamt that someone was beating the very life out of him and he was powerless to stop it. He awoke in a cold sweat, his bruised ribs aching.
* * *
By nightfall, Deidara and Sasori were deep within the Land of Fire, far south and east of Konoha. The forest they'd been traveling through was becoming increasingly lush and vibrant, thick with ferns, tropical flowers and twisting, moss-covered trees. It was beautiful enough for Deidara to temporarily stop seething about Kisame - he found himself feeling a childish wonderment at the thick, exotic foliage and abundance of wildlife. He knew Sasori was getting a kick out of his naivite but he didn't care. Everything down here was just so much different than the barren Land of Earth he'd grown up in. It was so much more... alive.
"You gonna start chasing butterflies or what?" Sasori mused, watching the blonde's awed expression with a crooked grin. The redhead had been forced to shed Hiruko - the undergrowth was too thick for the puppet's bulk.
"Don't ruin this for me," Deidara said, his eyes wide. "And I might be tempted to... if I see one. Do butterflies go to sleep at night?"
"Umm... yah... maybe you could chase a moth or something," Sasori mumbled as he pulled out a map and examined it. "We covered a lot of ground today," he said. "We should be hitting the eastern coast of the Fire Country sometime tomorrow morning... and then all we have to do is follow the coast to the meeting site." He held out the map a little as Deidara curiously peeked over his shoulder at it. "So what do you want to do?" he asked. "Do you want to rest now or wait until we reach the coast?"
"Wow, you're actually giving me a choice?" the blonde said dryly.
"Don't push it," Sasori growled as he rolled up the map and stuck it back in his cloak. "I'm trying to be nice to you, incase you didn't notice."
A million sarcastic responses flickered over Deidara's tongue but he held them back. "I guess I'd rather rest now," he finally said. "I'll wind up eating shit trying to walk through this forest in the dark." He looked around the scenery with slightly less wonderment as he scanned the thick, bristling undergrowth for a place to lay down.
"You're probably better off sleeping in a tree," Sasori stated, following his partner's gaze. "You'll get bitten by something if you lay on the ground."
"Hmm," Deidara said, pondering the fact. He'd heard that the more tropical an environment was, the larger and scarier the insects... although Iwa had it's fair share of pissed off, poisonous creatures as well. He couldn't imagine anything worse than the hairy wolf spiders native to his homeland. Did the jungle have even biggier, hairier spiders? I don't wanna know, he thought to himself.
His train of thought dispersed when Sasori nimbly climbed the nearest tree, jumping lightly from branch to branch until he was little more than a red-headed speck far above the blonde's head. Deidara sighed and followed his partner's lead, ascending a nearby tree until he could see the starry night sky through the canopy.
"I'll keep watch," Sasori stated to the blonde, now that they were level.
Deidara peered down - he couldn't even see the forest floor. "What if I fall?" he asked. He wasn't afraid of hights when he was flying... but this was a different situation entirely.
Sasori - to the blonde's surprise - wasn't smirking. "I'll catch you," he said simply.
"Seriously?" Deidara asked incredulously.
"I told you, don't push it," the redhead growled.
* * *
Kisame didn't stop for another break until dawn, running himself ragged until his bruised ribs ached too badly to ignore any longer. He stopped at a small river that ran through the ever thickening forest, catching his breath for a few minutes before tending to his injuries. I'm just a few miles north of Konoha, he realized, recognizing the geography immediately as he took note of his surroundings - he'd been through the Land of Fire so many times there wasn't a square inch he wasn't familiar with. I'm too close to the village... he told himself wearily. I shouldn't rest here.
But his aching body begged to differ. If he kept going in his current state, he'd wind up opening himself up for an attack in his exhaustion. It was safer to rest here for an hour or so than it would be to blindly push ahead, although neither option was ideal. He'd been so fatigued over the last few hours that he had strayed off his intended course, winding up a few miles east of where he wanted to be. He sighed, rubbing his temples, then unraveled Samehada's binds, letting the creature swim around in the river while he dressed his wounds. He considered taking a bath but thought better of it - getting ambushed by Leaf ninja while he was naked was not something he cared to experience.
Once his injuries were clean and rebandaged, he called for Samehada, making the sword lay at his side for protection. This time, his exhaustion was too great to give him nightmares - he dreamt instead of the nurse doting on him, which wasn't entirely unpleasant.
He awoke to the sound of growling. As he forced himself into full awareness, he found Samehada bristling defensively at his side - but the growl was coming from somewhere else. Wolves, he realized, recognizing the sound in a heartbeat. As he rose to his feet, trying not to act as injured as he felt, he could see shadows flickering behind the cover the trees. Looks like a whole pack, he thought irritably. Anywhere else in the world, wolves didn't pose a threat - they rarely attacked humans and weren't very smart - but near Konoha it was a different story. Wolves around here were tamed and bred by the Inuzuka clan. He clenched Samehada's hilt in his bandaged hands, trying to look for the human that was behind this.
"I thought I smelled shark." The voice was instantly familiar; Kisame laughed outloud but didn't relax his guard.
"How've you, been, Tsume?" he growled. "I must say it's been a while."
"Over a decade, I believe." Tsume Inuzuka stepped forward from the tree line, a huge wolf at her side. She looked as frightening as ever, her appearance more animalistic than human. "Shit, you're looking pretty rough these days," she stated bluntly.
"I'm injured," Kisame sighed. "I don't just walk around covered in bandages for no reason." He scowled and added, "and you look about the same... like a snarling, man-eating bitch."
Tsume grinned, baring her prominent fangs. "You're in no position to talk shit," she growled. "I have you outnumbered."
"What, I thought 'bitch' was a compliment in your clan," Kisame said dryly. "And you don't have me outnumbered. If you attack me, I'll kill all your fuckin' wolves then probably... I don't know... slowly drown you in this shallow river. Believe me, I'm in a shitty mood."
"Wow," Tsume muttered. "You're even more of an asshole than I remember." She pulled out a kunai and took another step forward. "I guess it comes with being a criminal. I was disappointed when I learned you'd joined the Akatsuki... I thought you were better than that."
Kisame snorted, offended for reasons he couldn't put his finger on. "Shinobi are just weapons," he growled. "Kirigakure tossed me aside and the Akatsuki picked me up, nothing more... so what does it matter if I'm being wielded by someone else now?" He sighed, exhausted and annoyed. "Either way, I'm not up for a deep conversation," he said. "And I have no business with Konoha at the moment. I'm just passing through."
"Sorry if I don't believe you," Tsume replied, bristling. "You're too close to be 'just passing through.' And if I'm correct, the last time you were here, you infiltrated the village and put one of our finest shinobi in the hospital."
"That was Itachi, not me... all I managed to do was get kicked by Might Guy," Kisame said. "And do you see Itachi anywhere? Or... smell him, in your case?"
Tsume shrugged but didn't relax her guard. "Maybe he already has me in a genjutsu," she growled. "How would I even know? He's skilled enough to cripple Kakashi."
Kisame sighed and leaned back against a tree. "Believe me, I'm aware of his abilities," he muttered. "Whether or not you're convinced, I have nothing to hide... so either fight me or don't."
A long, tense silence ensued as Tsume seemed to reflect, her red-shadowed eyes narrowing slightly. "Alright," she finally growled. "I'll let you leave... but I'm going to escort you out of the village boundaries." She relaxed her defensive stance but kept the kunai clenched in her fist. "I'm only doing this because I want to respect you as a shinobi," she snarled. "So don't make me regret it."
She called off the wolf pack, leaving only the large black-and-white one at her side. Why the hell would you put an eye patch on an animal? Kisame wondered irritably as he glared at the beast. It's almost as bad as making a lapdog wear a sweater.
Being escorted by Tsume was not a pleasant experience. His injuries combined with dizzying fatigue made him travel at a slower pace than she was comfortable with - every time he paused to catch his breath, he was speared onward with the tip of her kunai. When he was finally far enough away for her satisfaction, he slumped to a crouch, breathing raggedly.
Tsume regarded him for a while as he pathetically gasped for air and clutched his aching ribs, the expression on her face conveying something in between pity and disgust. "What the hell happened to you?" she finally snarled. "You're nothing like the strong shinobi I remember... more like a whipped dog."
"I'm injured, you bitch," he heaved, sweat pouring down his forehead.
"Don't talk to me like I'm stupid," Tsume snapped. "It's obviously more than that." When she crouched down next to him, her searching glare made him feel uncomfortable and mildly embarrased. "You've always been my enemy," she growled softly. "But that doesn't stop me from wondering about you. To see you this way just... pisses me off."
"Well, too bad," Kisame hissed, shying away from her intense gaze. "It's ridiculous that you think about me at all."
Tsume tried to put a hand on his shoulder but quickly pulled away when he winced and shuddered. The look in her eyes made him feel like slitting his own throat.
"You're angry... and afraid," she stated. "I can smell it on you like a sickness."
"Gross," Kisame murmured. Exhaustion was numbing his senses, making his vision blur and his sore muscles tingle. "Just leave me alone, Tsume," he growled. "I'm not the same person you remember..."
"Who did this to you?" she demanded.
"It's none of you're fuckin' business," the swordsman rasped. He clumsily sat himself down, bumping his head on a tree as his muscles buckled. "I just want to be alone," he sighed raggedly. "So fuck off."
"Fine," Tsume snapped, briskly rising to her feet. "Maybe if you weren't such a prick, this wouldn't have happened to you." She looked revolted and a little sad as she sheathed her kunai. "All these years, I've been clinging onto the hope that we'd run into eachother again," she confessed. "In these daydreams, you're a strong and vicious shinobi, making the men of Konoha pale in comparison as you... I don't know... whisk me away. But now I see that I was dillusional, because the man before me is just a cowering piece of shit."
"And you wonder why you scare men away," Kisame snarled, feeling wretched and impotent.
"I scare them away because they're all too weak," Tsume stated. "And now I finally see that you're no different. I almost want to thank you - you've dashed my hopes completely of ever finding a man strong enough to satisfy me. I suppose it's given me some closure." She turned to leave, growling a command to the wolf. "I need to get back to my family," she said. "If you're still here when I return, you'll have a fight on your hands."
"Oh, your family," Kisame murmured. "How's your son? You mentioned him last time we met... he must be in his teens now."
"Kiba is growing up to be a brilliant shinobi," Tsume replied. "And I can only pray he doesn't end up like you."
And then she was gone.
Kisame felt too wretched for words - he welcomed the ignorance of sleep as it quickly took hold. Unfortunately, he dreamed of Tsume, reliving their long-ago encounter with painful clarity. He was a Kiri shinobi back then, on a stealth mission to assasinate a Konoha figurehead. Tsume had tracked him down a few miles outside of the village, killing off his squad and quite literally treeing him with her pack of wolves. After a brief, vicious fight, they had found themselves locked in a standoff, snarling at eachother like a couple of animals. The sex that ensued had been wordless and violent, an experience that left them both dumbfounded and weak-kneed. For a while, they had just laid there in a tangle of naked limbs, too dazed to bother trying to fight any more. Finally she had told him, with brutal conviction, The only reason I'm letting you go is because I want to see you again. Perhaps... someday... the time will come when we're no longer enemies.
Kisame had been enamoured with Tsume for a long time after that, hoping that eventually Kiri and Konoha would form a pact so that he could meet her as a comrade. But his life took a different turn - when the two shinobi villages finally agreed upon a truce, he had already started working for the Akatsuki. It just wasn't meant to be, he used to tell himself... but the dashed opportunity always left him wondering what could have been. Maybe they could have started a life together. Maybe he could have made her his wife and been a father to her children. As time passed, the fantasies of ever achieving a normal, domestic life with Tsume - let alone anyone - became more and more incredulous until he stopped thinking about it altogether. But the woman's words had still cut him to the bone. He awoke in a cold sweat, miserable to a nearly suicidal degree.
She's right, he brooded as he rose to his feet. I brought this hell on myself. He was still tired and so hungry it was making him feel sick, but he forced himself to push onward. Stopping to rest had done nothing to refresh him - infact, he was positive that he felt even worse than before. His anger was waning despite his best efforts to cling onto it, morphing into something much worse - guilt. Fuck you, Tsume, he seethed. Why'd you have to be so honest?!
* * *
By the time he reached the meeting site in the Tea Country, he wasn't sure what he was feeling anymore. How long had he traveled without stopping? Two days, maybe even three? He'd heard that it was possible to ride a horse until it fell over dead with sheer exhaustion... it was the closest analogy he could think of to what he'd been doing to himself. Resting only brought him anguish - spurred on by his own misery, he had run until his brain could no longer process thought. Now that he was here with nowhere else to go, he was afraid the maddening guilt would return. Part of him wanted to just keep going until he reached the gates of hell.
He sat himself down at the water's edge, looking blandly out to sea. He hadn't seen the ocean in a long time... he would have appreciated the view if he were any less screwed up. Where the fuck is everyone else? he wondered. There's no way I'm the first one here. However, he wasn't entirely sure of the fact - he doubted that anyone else had set such a ridiculously grueling pace.
Ugh, there's nothing to do but wait, he told himself. It was a good thing he was too tired to be distressed about seeing Itachi... though he wasn't sure it what he'd do when he actually saw his partner in person. Maybe he'd just snap and blindly attack the Uchiha like a rabid dog... or perhaps he'd start crying like a bitch. Hopefully it won't be the latter, he thought as he laid down in the sand and closed his eyes. I'm more worried about seeing Deidara at this point, he brooded. He's going to try to wrench the truth out of me... and I'm not a very good liar.
Mere seconds later, he found himself too tired to hold his train of thought. He fell asleep to the rhythmic sound of the waves lapping the shore.

*AUTHOR'S NOTE* It's official... I'm now even more of a Naruto dweeb than I was before. I had to spend a copious amount of time staring at a world map to get the geography correct. I don't even know when the hell the Tea Country was mentioned in the manga, but apparently, it's a penninsula south of the Land of Fire. Kind of like a fictional Florida, lol. Since Orochimaru probably has a shitload of hideouts, I thought it would be fun to put one down there - it gives Deidara a chance to be a naive little uke, gawking at the scenery. ^^ Also, my knowledge of frostbite is considerably better now too... thought probably still far from accurate cuz I'm too lazy to research it in depth. o_O Thanks, wikipedia!
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