Adult-FanFiction.org : Naruto

Shinigami Shuffle	By : Blackkitten23 Category: Naruto > Yaoi - Male/Male > Gaara/Naruto Views: 3284 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or any anime OR anything and I don't make a profit off of my stories

Chapter List
- 1
- 2
(I'm thinking)
"I'm speaking"
"Demon / summon / ghost speaking" 
(Demon / summon / ghost thinking)
 /Author's comments
XXXXXXXXXX
"I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE THE ORANGE MUST DIE!" screamed a blonde haired man "17 FUCKING YEARS THEY MADE ME WEAR THIS SHIT BUT NO MORE MWHAHA!"
The crazy blonde was laughing manically as he made a large pile of orange jumpsuits. Just as he was putting the finishing touches on, meaning the third bottle of lighter fluid, when his watch started beeping. The psycho stopped to check his watch.
"2:58 am, damn time to report in " he glares at the pile "I will be back"
The blond body flickered to his bathroom and stood in front of the mirror. He placed his hand on the mirror and channeled some black and purple energy into it. He took a step back and watched as the mirror warped into 8 flat screen monitors each about the size of an iPad.
Monitor 1 turned on: 2 people appeared on the screen, one blonde woman and one tan skinned man with goggles
"hey boss, Yugito here reporting in" said the blonde woman
"Yo boss man, Killer bee here reporting in" said the man with goggles
Monitor 2 turned on: a redhead with dark circles around his teal eyes and a tattoo of the kanji for love on his forehead appeared on screen
"hey general Naruto, Gaara here reporting in"
Monitor 3 turned on: a green haired girl with brown skin and orange eyes appeared on screen
"Hey general! Fu here reporting in"
Monitor 4 turned on: a slender man with shoulder length brown hair and pale gold eyes appeared on screen
"Utakata here to report in"
Monitor 5 turned on: a boy with pink pupiless eyes and light gray hair with a stich like scar going from his left eye going all the way down his cheek appeared on screen
"whats up general, Yagura here"
Monitor 6 turned on: a man completely covered in red samurai armor except his brown eyes appeared on screen
"hello General Naruto, Han here reporting for duty sir"
Monitor 7 turned on: a man with black eyes and a red bread and moustache appeared on screen
"Yo general Naruto, Roshi here reporting in"
Monitor 8 turned on: a woman with short dark blue hair with a blue rose in her hair appeared on screen
"hi general Konan reporting in"
Naruto raised an eyebrow "just you today Konan, where are the others?
"Shinju finished his hibernation early. Since his demon chakra is gone making it possible for us to touch him and help him pass on, Nagato and Yahiko went to escort him to Death's desk, where Shinju decided he would wait for the other tailed demons. Everyone else is playing puppet for Obito, oh wait I mean Madara Uchiha" she finished with an eye roll and the other reapers snickered.
If only Obito knew that the people he's trying to fool were reapers.
Naruto said "well that's great news! With Shinju safe from Obito, that's less to worry about. Alright, what other news? Have any of the real jinchuuriki made contact with their prisoners?"
"no sir" was the response from the other reapers
"good, same here my idiot teammate is still in the dark, now how close are your demons to finishing their hibernations? Kurama has about 3 months left"
"Chomei has about 1 week left" chirped Fu
"2 weeks left" said Utakata
"about 5 or 6 days" said Yugito
"3 weeks for Son Goku" said Roshi
"about 6 weeks sir " said Han
"2 months for Shukaku" said Gaara
"about 7 weeks" said Killer Bee
"7 or 8 weeks" said Yagura
Konan was writing all this down in a notebook "alright we are going to start hunting for you guys in a month"
Naruto grinned "sounds like this job is almost done, but be careful and don't let your guard down and keep in mind that even if you escorted your demon to the other side and use the akatsuki to fake your death your job isn't done, you are to return in your reaper forms and assist those who are still waiting for their hibernations to finish, understood?"
"yes general Naruto"
"good, that concludes this meeting. Your all dismissed." The monitors turned off and reverted back into a normal bathroom mirror.
A psychotic grin spread across Naruto's face "now, for some unfinished business" he pulled a flame thrower out of ... somewhere and shunshined back to the pile of victims.
XXXXXXXXXX
That morning Naruto was walking up to the team seven training ground. He saw Sai and Sakura waiting.
"hey guys what's up?" greeted the undercover reaper. He was wearing a black tee-shirt with black anbu style pants and black leather gloves and a black leather jacket, even the cloth for his headband and sandals were black.
"shut up baka, where the hell is your ugly jumpsuit?" screeched the pink banshee
"it was horrible! Some orange hating maniac broke into my house and burned everything! They even beat up the oranges in my kitchen! There was ash and pulp everywhere!" yelled Naruto as he pretended to be distraught when he really he couldn't be happier.
Sakura smirked "if you find out who did it, tell me and I'll reward them" she said in what she thought was a sexy voice. Naruto almost turned green at the thought of someone getting a reward from the pink banshee.
"no one deserves such a horrible fate" he mumbled
*poof* Their senseis Kakashi and Yamato arrived.
"Your late!" screeched the banshee making everyone flinch.
"sorry we were lost on the road of life" said Kakashi as Yamato shook his head. The wood user tried to get Kakashi here on time, but failed miserably.
"don't you need a life to get lost on that road. Dead people, porn, and plants aren't much of a life" the two jonin twitched at the sarcastic remark and turned to see who made it. They saw a smoking hot young man with blonde hair and dressed in black.
"and who are you?" said Yamato while thinking (will you go on a date with me?)
Naruto smirked "I know the orange jumpsuit wasn't flattering, but you should still be able to tell who I am."
Kakashi and Yamato were shocked "Naruto!"
"Yes it is I! Like the new look?" asked the reaper
"it's more appropriate for a ninja, but why the change?" asked Kakashi
Naruto shrugged "someone burned my jumpsuits"
The two jonin were worried "are you alright?" asked Kakashi
"I'm fine-"
"WHO CARES THE BAKA ISN'T IMPORTANT we should go get our mission done so we can bring my Sasuke-kun back" screeched Sakura as she walked to the hokage tower. She never noticed her senseis glare at her.
XXXXXXXXXX
They entered the hokage's office to see a pissed off hokage looking for her bottle of sake. She whirled round to look at them and first thing she saw was Naruto's new look and that he was swaying back and forth.
"Naruto what happened to your orange jumpsuit ... and are you HIGH!? WHO GAVE MY LITTLE NARUTO DRUGS" roared Tsunade as she flew into mother hen mode.
Naruto slurred "calm down granny, no one gave me drugs. I just shouldn't have stood so close to the fire while the evil orange was burning ... Kami knows what those things were made of"
"YOU BURNED YOUR OWN JUMPSUITS" screamed Yamato, Tusnade, and Kakashi. Sakura didn't care, if anything she was a little pissed that they weren't talking about Sasuke.
"well duuhh you guys didn't think I liked that shit, I only got it because it is the only thing demons are allowed to buy" slurred Naruto
Tsunade went from shocked to heartbroken "Naruto if something like that was going on you should've told me"
"the council is enough of a pain in the ass as it is, if you try helping even more than you already have things will just get worse-"
Sakura screeched and cut Naruto off "WOULD YOU SHUT UP YOU IDIOT! We should be talking about someone important, like Sasuke-kun"
Tsunade was about to yell at Sakura, but Naruto beat her to it "WOULD YOU SHUT UP ALREADY. No one likes you, you stupid pink banshee man-lady"
Sakura's jaw dropped, she never heard Naruto talk to her like that before "Lots of people like me, you have a crush on me!"
Naruto shook his head "no, I had a crush on a pink haired boy in the academy" he turned to Tsunade, Kakashi and Yamato "you can imagine how heartbroken I was when the boy I liked won kunoichi of the year"
Kakashi gave a relieved sigh "I thought I was the only one to make that mistake"
Yamato nodded "me too"
Sakura was fuming "you jerks"
Tsunade shook her head "alright knock it off all of you! Sakura another peep out of you and I will remove your reproductive organs" that shut pinky up cause she wanted to have Sasuke's kids "your mission is to go to Sand and pick up some documents from Gaara ... as soon as Naruto comes down from his high"
"yes hokage-sama"
- 1
- 2
You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.You need to be logged in to leave a review for this story.
Report Story

Shinigami Shuffle