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The Thin Line Between Love and Hate - COMPLETE	By : kizukatana Category: Naruto AU/AR > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 2092 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, Kishimoto does. I make no money from anything I write on this site.

Chapter List
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- 2
Summary: Sasuke couldn't believe that Naruto had betrayed him. But he would make him pay... divorce was just the beginning. If there was one thing an Uchiha knows, it's how to utterly destroy someone. And he would ignore the little twinges of guilt, because he knew he was right. Wasn't he? Naru/Sasu, Sasu/Naru AU
Warning 17+ only: Hard Yaoi (Boy x Boy) - Homophobic readers please hit the back button NOW. Not appropriate for young readers.
Disclaimer - I don't own Naruto - Masashi Kishimoto does, unfortunately. And I know that gay marriage isn't legal in Japan, but that is why this is AU.
Author's note and additional warnings... As you probably guessed, this story will have a good bit of angst, sex, and general bad relationship behavior, with hopefully some sweetness at the end. This chapter will actually be the worst in terms of bad relationship behavior - alcohol abuse, hate sex, and severe emotional fuckery. This is 'the break up' scene, so it is bad. But since I am starting the story here, hopefully that gives clues to how I am going to end it.
-xXx-
I can't fucking believe that bastard. Naruto thought hazily, staring down at the empty drink in his hand, idly watching a drip of condensation roll down the side of the glass. He had lost count at this point on how many he'd had. After all we went through together, he won't even tell me why. That fucking ice princess.
He motioned the bartender for another. Naruto didn't register the man's concerned look.
His parents' death, Itachi's accident, his general fucked up insecurities and paranoias. I stood by him through all his shit. Since we were fucking 12, I have been his best friend. God damn him. Now he says it was all just nothing? Just sex? We were married for three years, and it was all just nothing?
Naruto felt a wave of anguish wash over him as he remembered the day that they had gotten married. It had been warm and sunny. And perfect. Everyone had been so happy for them. The Golden Couple, the had called us. Naruto sneered uncharacteristically. One of the first gay couples in Japan to have married. Sasuke had come from one of the wealthiest and most powerful families in Japan, and he had taken a risk to be so open about their relationship. And now...
"Excuse me, is this seat taken?" Naruto looked up fuzzily to see a gorgeous red-head in a tiny dress with significant cleavage leaning towards him, smiling invitingly. Seriously, what is with these people? Naruto thought irritably. It was the sixth or seventh interruption since he'd sat at the bar. Five women and two men. But Naruto's response was always the same.
"I'm married," he flashed his ring and turned back to his drink. At least I was. He had no notion of how attractive he looked with his black jeans and white button-down shirt, an orange T-shirt peeking out underneath, golden hair messily sticking up. He was just over six feet tall, with the broader frame of his ancestry making him stick out about as much as his coloring in a room full of Japanese. But it had never been something he thought much about, or been particularly vain about. All that had mattered to him was that he was attractive to the one person who mattered.
I can't believe it's over, he thought numbly. Tonight was the last night he'd have keys to their house. He had designed it with the architect when they had gotten married. They had lived together in that house for almost three years. Three amazing years.
Now it's over. Out of the blue, Sasuke had told him he had a week to sign the divorce papers he had presented him with (left on my fucking desk) pack his stuff and get out. Then the asshole had just left on a week-long business trip to the US. Wouldn't talk to him. Wouldn't meet with him. Wouldn't return his calls. With no explanation as to why. Just that he was done with Naruto. All he would say was that he found him inconvenient to have in his house. Incon-fucking-venient! There had been no shouting, no fight. It's like he fired me, like I was just some sort of employee filling the role of husband, and he fired me. Didn't even care enough to make it a proper break-up. After being together in some form or another for more than ten years, he felt like he deserved a fucking breakup. And a reason. But he knew Sasuke. Knew him as well as he knew himself. And he knew it was really over. And that Sasuke would never tell him why. That door had already been shut, locked and fireballed to hell. And he would never know why.
He'll be back in the country tomorrow, Naruto thought hollowly. I can't see him again. I can't let him tear me down any more, or I might never get the pieces back together again. I need to be out of here before noon tomorrow.
He had already had the movers take the few things that were actually his from the house, mostly from the room on the second floor where he painted, sketched blueprints and generally "did his creative thing" as Sasuke used to call it. After college, they had started their own company together. Itachi was running the family mega-corporation, and rather than being 'second in command', Sasuke had decided he wanted to try a venture on his own. Itachi had been the angel investor (and they had laughed so hard over that financial term being applied to Itachi) for the new corporation supplying the seed money. Naruto had been the creative genius behind it, blending his technical knowledge and intuition for people, and Sasuke had applied his financial and business savvy. They had met with tremendous success in every business they took on. But more than the thrill of the financial success, it had been fun. Working with his best friend, and building something from nothing. Combining their natural strengths and abilities. Naruto sighed, and thought dully that he should sell his 33% share of the company to Sasuke or Itachi. He knew he could never work there again. With him. And Sasuke could run things just fine without him. Sasuke can always manage anything. He felt the bitterness well up again.
Naruto was only taking things that had belonged to him prior to their marriage from their home, and that wasn't much. Any of the things they had bought together he wasn't touching. They just had too many painful memories associated with it. There was just the clothing left at this point. He would go there tonight, and sleep one last night alone in that enormous bed that he had shared with Sasuke. He shivered as he remembered all the things that they - Stop it! It's over. And that fucking asshole has finished it. Just pack your shit and get the hell out of here.
He paid the bill at the bar, and staggered out and caught a cab to his home. His ex-home.
He made up the steps to the entryway of the house, trying to suppress the memories of all the times he and Sasuke had walked them together. And what so often happened as soon as they were inside those large paneled doors. Why had he even come back tonight? He should have just had the movers pack his clothes for him and sort them later. Why was he doing this to himself? Because it has to be a clean break, or I won't be able to heal. I need to leave behind anything that has too many memories of him.
He fumbled with the keys, leaning heavily against the door as the world spun around him. He didn't usually drink. He couldn't even remember the last time he had been this smashed. But it didn't matter now. He just had to get through this last night, then he was fucking out of here. Out of Japan and out of that sadistic bastard's life for good. He'd go somewhere far away and start picking up the pieces. He just needed to make it out of here without seeing Sasuke. He knew he couldn't take it, or he'd break.
The house was dark, but he didn't bother turning on the lights. They had lived here for three years, and he knew where he was going. He staggered up the curved staircase and down the hall to their bedroom. He'd just throw the clothes he was keeping on the bed for the movers to take in the morning, after he had sorted out any that reminded him of Sasuke. Then he'd go sleep it off in one of the guest rooms, and be out of here before Sasuke got back at noon. There was no way he could sleep in their bed again. Not after everything that had happened.
"Fucking bastard. God I hate you for doing this," he whispered to the empty room. And was shocked when he heard it whisper back.
"You're the one who ruined this. Don't act all sad now just because you got caught," the voice was one he recognized instantly. It's tone and timbre were seared into Naruto's being. But the sheer hatred that laced it was new to him. At least, new for being directed at him.
"Sasuke?" He hated how weak his voice sounded. Hated how weak he was to still feel the love and longing crash through him just knowing they were together in this room again. It was the first time he had been alone with Sasuke since everything went to hell. And he still had no idea why, what had changed. He didn't realize he had asked the question out loud.
"Who says anything changed? Maybe we both just need to wake up to the reality of what it has always been. I mean really," Naruto didn't need to be able to see in the darkness to detect Sasuke's sneer. "- did you ever think I could love someone like you? That you would really be enough for me to last? What could you possibly bring into this relationship, other than a decent piece of ass. But now even that has gotten tiring. So it's time you got your own life now and got the fuck out of mine." Sasuke's voice was absolutely flat. Naruto felt a chill across his skin. Even when they were rivals back in grade school and high school, it had never been like this. There had at least been the seeds of friendship even through their worst fights, and later something more, beneath the rivalry. There had always been some underlying warmth. But this feeling now was ice cold. There was nothing left. Naruto took a step into the room, stumbling a bit as he did so.
"You're drunk?" Sasuke sounded slightly surprised. He'd never seen Naruto drunk, except when they had turned 20 and were finally legal. But even then, he had only gotten buzzed. Tonight, Naruto was absolutely plastered, swaying just to stand up.
"What the hell do you care," Naruto slurred. "You weren't supposed to be here. You gave me until noon. It's not fucking noon yet."
"I thought I'd just make sure you didn't take anything that didn't belong to you. And of course, I was curious to see if you'd have any of your little friends help you with the packing. Someone to help you give this bed one last go before you leave."
"You fucking asshole. Don't try to make me out as the one who lost interest... the one who walked away. You're the one who fucking fired me from being your husband. You didn't even have the balls to tell me why. Just dropped the papers on my desk and walked out," Naruto was shaking with anger and hurt. The room was spinning, but all he could see was Sasuke getting up and walking over to him. Their eyes were level with each other, the anger and pain radiating from blue, and sheer ice from black.
"What else do you expect? Any sub-par performer in my company knows they won't last long. Why should it be any different in my personal life?" Sasuke's voice was emotionless poison. If Naruto had been sober, maybe he would have had the strength to not rise to the bait. Maybe. But his barriers were all down, so he just lashed back out.
"Sub-par. Sub-par? Ten days ago I fucked you until you passed out. You were begging me... begging me to take you. You could hardly get on the plane to go to that business meeting in Okinawa you were so sore. Then you come back - and dump me? After you left I got food poisoning and was in the hospital for two days. And somehow, between fucking you senseless and getting sick, I became sub-par?"
If Naruto had his usual wits about him, he would have seen the flicker of subtler emotions flash across his lover's face. The hurt, the love, the worry, but all he could sense was the overwhelming fury that was pumping off Sasuke in waves.
"If all I wanted was a lay, I could just get a whore. And hey, then at least I'd have variety, right? I mean, seriously, do you have any idea how many offers I get in one week alone? Can you really claim to be better than all of them? I doubt it."
Naruto went white. "Is that... is that really all this is to you now? I was with you when you got the news about your parents. I go with you every week to visit Itachi in the hosp-"
"Shut up!" Sasuke's hand flew out and he backhanded Naruto across the face. It was hard to tell who looked more shocked, as the two stared at each other for an elongated second.
"You... you fucking slapped me? Like I'm your bitch?" Naruto grabbed Sasuke by his collar and slammed him up against the wall. "You fucking pussy. If you want to fight me, then at least fight me like a man. Let's have it out right here."
Sasuke's eyes narrowed. He thrust his hands up between Naruto's arms, and struck outward, hard, hitting Naruto's forearms and forcing Naruto to break his grip on Sasuke's shirt. He tried to follow up with a short punch to Naruto's stomach, but even drunk the man had good reflexes and blocked him. Sasuke was less quick blocking Naruto's counter puch, which caught him in the jaw. It had been a long time since they had fought like this. Since middle school. But it all came back to them now. Sasuke's elbow flew out and caught Naruto in the chest. Normally, Naruto would have just pivoted and returned, but his balance was basically swimming in tequila, so he just tipped over, grabbing Sasuke's shirt and taking him down with him. They wrestled on the floor, each trying to get an arm free enough to punch the other, but suddenly the heat and pace changed and they both realized the big difference between rolling around as 12-year-olds and rolling around after years of having scalding hot sex together.
Even through the alcohol haze, Naruto knew this was a horrendously bad idea, but the feel of his lover's body hard and hot against his just drowned out all rational thought. He pulled Sasukes's mouth down roughly and kissed him. To his surprise, he felt Sasuke return the kiss. But this kiss bore absolutely no resemblance to any of the kisses they had shared in the past. This kiss was full of hate and anger. There was no gentleness, no affection. It was bruising and meant to hurt and punish. But it was still hot as hell and they couldn't pull away. The force of their desperation and fury incinerated any thought processes or judgment, and they were pushing up against each other, gasping with the fierceness of the arousal it created in both of them. There were no gentle caresses, no friendly banter. Sasuke roughly forced his hands under Naruto's shirt, feeling his hard abs flex with their movement, and slid his palm down over Naruto's rock-hard arousal, which was straining the zipper of his jeans. They both groaned.
Naruto pulled down the collar on Sasuke's shirt and sucked on the sensitive spot just at the juncture of his neck, feeling Sasuke shudder and pick up the pace as he thrust his erection against Naruto's through their pants. Naruto shoved up Sasuke's shirt, his tongue laving over the pale chest to swirl around the nipple. But Sasuke didn't want foreplay. He shoved Naruto's face down to his crotch, and Naruto didn't hesitate to unzip the black jeans and pull out the marble-hard cock. All he could think about was being with Sasuke one last time. Making him remember everything they had had together. Even though he knew it was too late now. He could still make Sasuke regret throwing it all away. He curled his fingers around the pale, hard cock and pulled the head into his mouth, feeling Sasuke shudder and hearing his growl of impatience. He twisted his hand back and forth on the base of Sasuke's erection and began sucking and swirling his tongue around the head and across the slit as he did, feeling Sasuke go mindless with need. After all their years together, Naruto knew all the right buttons, all the right spots. He didn't bother to hold his lover's hips as Sasuke thrust deep in his mouth, taking the considerable length all at a go.
"Nar-," Sasuke choked back saying his name. "Take it all, you fucking asshole." And he came hard down Naruto's throat, pumping his release while fisting his hands into blond hair. As soon as he had finished, Naruto flipped him over; Sasuke heard the sound of Naruto's zipper. Naruto had half expected Sasuke to leave after finding his own release, but he didn't complain as Naruto reached for the lube above them on the nightstand.
Mimicking his friends words with his own actions, he put the lube on his erection and entered him in one hard thrust. "Ungh."
Sasuke grunted at the sudden entry, but was already pushing back against him in rhythm with his thrusts. They had had sex countless times, but this was the first time that they truly were just fucking. There were no words of affection, no teasing, nothing that you couldn't get from any stranger on the street. Except their unique heat, the way they fit together, the way they belonged together. That was still the same. Only now it was just raw lust, full of anger, dark with hate. Naruto felt Sasuke's body clench, and heard him shout hoarsely through his release. Naruto followed seconds later, collapsing next to Sasuke on the floor, panting, the room spinning. He was starting to feel nauseous. He realized his hand was resting on Sasuke's hip when the man flung it off, pulling himself away and disengaging their bodies.
Sasuke got up, pulling his pants up and tucking in his shirt. Another first for them. Usually they stayed together after sex, just letting their bodies cool and feeling the light touch of the other at their side. Naruto was usually the first to recover, and get them cleaned up. But that was when they had cared for each other. Loved each other. "I can't believe I just let you fuck me without a condom. If you gave me something, I swear I will hunt you down and castrate you." Sasuke turned, and walked over to his jacket, pulling something out of his pocket.
"I guess I should pay you for your services," He wrote out a check, tore it out of the book, and slapped it down on the nightstand. "If I didn't add it up right, you can just add it to the divorce settlement. I figure about $100 a go for a decently skilled whore. This should about cover our relationship to date. Don't expect anything more. And don't expect to get another fucking penny from me. I'll be back at noon. You'd better be gone."
Naruto's head was reeling. He could hardly keep his eyes open. He wished he would just fucking pass out already. What was the point of drinking so much if he had to still be conscious for this? He hoped in the back of his head that he'd throw up all over Sasuke's precious Persian carpet before morning. But despite himself, he couldn't help asking one last time. "Sasuke. Why?"
Sasuke just looked down at him for a second. Then turned and walked to the door, pulling his jacked on. "Because I'm done with you."
He walked down the wall, and pretended he hadn't seen the tears on the golden face he had loved for more than half his life. Pretended he didn't hear the soft, broken sobs from the man on the floor of his bedroom.
-xXx-
Naruto woke up in the early dawn. He wished he had just stayed passed out. He looked at the rug. No puke. Damn.
Mechanically, he picked up the check that Sasuke had written out. $500,000. At $100 a go, Sasuke must have estimated we'd had sex five thousand times. Naruto thought over the past 10 years they'd been together. That sounded about right. He ripped the check up into as small of pieces as he could and sprinkled it over the bed; then he went and took a shower.
Wrapped in a thick towel, he walked over to the massive walk-in closet that they had shared, ignoring the scent of Sasuke that filled it. More than three quarters of the closet was filled with Sasuke's clothes... he'd always been more into appearances than Naruto. Naruto pulled a sweatshirt and some jeans on, then grabbed one of the suitcases and opened it up, throwing in his T-shirts, jeans, and sweats. Anything that Sasuke had bought for him or helped pick out landed in a heap on the floor. When the suitcase was full, he zipped it closed. All the suits had been purchased by Sasuke, so they were staying. It looked like the movers weren't going to have much to do with his clothes after all. He flipped open his phone and dialed them, letting them know they didn't need to come back, and just to put everything they had already taken into storage.
He walked to the safe and opened it, taking out his passport but leaving everything else. It was all either Sasuke's or something that Sasuke had bought for him. None of it was coming with him.
He thought about calling Shikamaru. He had handled all the legal matters for them in the past, but he was acting on Sasuke's behalf in the divorce. Plus Naruto didn't want to talk to someone who was in Sasuke's employ. He didn't want Sasuke to know anything about his life any more. So he called the only other attorney he knew.
"Gaara, it's Naruto. I need you to handle some legal matters for me. It's about my divorce. And my company. Can you meet me at the airport at 4 o'clock?"
-xXx-
Sasuke walked through their house. My house, now. At least for a little while. The realtor would be there in a few minutes. He had been surprised that Naruto had given up the house without challenge, since Naruto had been the one to design most of it. Sasuke had wanted him to fight for it. When he had handed Naruto the divorce papers and told him to get out within the week, he had expected Naruto to try for the house. He had wanted it to hurt Naruto that he was going to take it away. But Naruto hadn't batted an eye. Hadn't even seemed to care. He had just been so fixated at trying to make Sasuke actually admit that he knew that Naruto had betrayed him. Which Sasuke would never, ever do. That would be admitting that Naruto had won. That Naruto had successfully fooled him. So Naruto could rot in hell. He had to admit that Naruto been pretty good at pretending to have no idea why it was happening. Looking so hurt and confused. Fuck him. Of course he knows why. All the ridiculous voicemails he had left Sasuke during the week after he had handed Naruto the divorce papers, wanting to talk about it. Sounding so pathetic and asking why, why, why until Sasuke wanted to just delete that word from existence. He fucking hated the word why. But he was not going to give Naruto the satisfaction of making him voice it out loud. Of letting him see how much damage he had wrought. He fucking knows.
Then Sasuke had assumed Naruto would at least gut the place, taking everything of value. But again, Naruto was perversely denying him. He had taken almost nothing. Only Naruto's own drafting table. The art supplies and easels. The horrible orange sofa that Naruto had kept with him since college, never allowing Sasuke to throw it out. Sasuke had finally insisted that if they absolutely had to keep it, it would go up in Naruto's work room where no one else had to look at it. Now it was gone. I don't miss it. Sasuke told himself. I don't.
He looked around the room that had been Naruto's domain. It had been colorful, disorganized, full of life. Now it was empty, except for a few canvasses facing the wall. Sasuke walked over, turning them around, already knowing what they would be. Paintings of Sasuke. He looked at the images of himself. Naruto captured so much detail and emotion in his paintings. Sasuke wanted to burn them all. He didn't want to see the emotions in his face that he used to have when he looked at Naruto. He didn't want these to serve as record of the things Naruto had seen in him, the things that Naruto had been able to draw out of him. Sasuke picked one up, looking at it. The Sasuke in the painting was looking directly at the painter, a slow, sexy smile on his face. Sasuke threw it as hard as he could against the wall, the frame breaking into splinters on impact.
He turned to walk out of the room. It was empty, lifeless, and now broken. Just like me, a voice in his mind whispered.
He walked back through the house. All the furniture they had picked out together was still here, untouched. The china they had received as a wedding present. The original artwork on the wall, some of it quite valuable. Naruto had picked out most of that. Still here. Why didn't he take it? It was clear now that Naruto hadn't stayed with him for love. So it must have been for the money. Just like everyone else. But it pissed Sasuke off that Naruto wasn't confirming this for him. He had left it wide open. Why wasn't Naruto finally showing his true colors? He knows it's over. He knows me well enough to know I am not bluffing. This was his last chance to take this stuff. Why didn't he take it?
It pissed him off. He didn't like being wrong. Twice.
The doorbell rang. Sasuke went and let in the realtor, and told him to just look around and do what he had to do, then see himself out and list the house for what he thought it was worth. It took an hour, with the man taking photos of the various rooms, then finally he was gone. And Sasuke was alone.
He walked up the curved stairs and down the hall to the bedroom. Their bedroom.
Sasuke set the tools down that he had carried into the bedroom with him. The room still faintly smelled like sex. And like Naruto. Visions of the night before flashed back through his mind. That had been a colossal fucking mistake. He never should have touched him. But seeing Naruto drunk, so vulnerable, he knew that he would be able to touch him, to have him, and not be rejected. And he had just wanted, so desperately, to be touched by Naruto one last time. So fucking weak. He would have to stay away from Naruto for a bit. He just couldn't look at that tangled, golden hair or those sapphire-blue eyes and not respond. Naruto's tan body was broader in the shoulder and slightly more muscled than his pale one. And he had always reveled in that difference. Reveled in the fact that he was able to completely possess such a beautiful creature, despite all the darkness in his own soul.
Sasuke's gut clenched. Never. I will NEVER forgive him. As expected, Naruto was gone. Probably moved into some penthouse with one of his whores. I wonder which one he picked... Hinata or Sakura? Sasuke thought bitterly. Maybe it would be someone he hadn't even met yet. At this point, nothing would surprise him. It burned him to know that Naruto was out somewhere probably having someone tend his hangover, talking about how pathetic it had been that Sasuke had slept with him one last time, even knowing what he knew.
Naruto had NOTHING before we were together. He was just some low-class orphan, with no talent and no - Sasuke cut himself off. No. He wouldn't lie to himself. Naruto had always been exceptionally talented. He was creative and good with technical things and funny and intuitive and honest. No. Not so honest. Bitterness hit Sasuke so hard he thought for a moment he was going to vomit. But he quelled it down.
Never again. I will NEVER let anyone fool me again.
He walked to the closet. Saw the clothes piled up on the floor. He nudged them with his foot, looking through them. All things he had bought for Naruto, or picked out for him. Dumped on the floor, like garbage. He felt sick. He turned and walked back into the bedroom.
Looking down at the bed, he noticed the scraps of paper scattered across it. He picked one up, immediately recognizing it as pieces of the check he had left Naruto with the night before. Again, he was surprised. He had assumed that Naruto would take the money. After all, it was apparently one of the main reasons he had stuck around so long. Because clearly, it hadn't been what Sasuke had thought all these years. It hadn't been love. It hadn't been real. It had all been a fucking lie.
He walked back to where he had set the items down when he first entered the room, and picked up the long carving knife. He walked over to the bed and grabbed the crimson sheets in his hand. He remembered the photo he had seen of Naruto in these exact sheets. Naruto and -
He took the knife and systematically slashed the sheets to shreds. Then he dumped them in the fireplace. He knelt on the bed and plunged the knife in deep, tearing into the mattress. Cutting it to ribbons. He threw it off to the side, then went pack and put the knife back down and picked up the sledge hammer. He felt nothing as he broke the heavy teak frame into kindling, smashing it to bits, refusing to think of all the things they had done together on that bed. As though crushing its existence would erase everything that had happened. Make it not exist. Make it not hurt.
He sat on the floor, sweaty and panting. Glad he could not see the dead agony in his own onyx eyes.
His realtor had already found him a suitable apartment. He would never have to come back to this place. He would pull himself together. And he would make sure that absolutely everyone knew that he was not mourning his cheating ex-lover. Hell, ever since he was 10, people had been lining up to fuck him, men and women. But the only one he had ever loved was Naruto. But last night had shown him something. You don't need love to fuck. Hate worked just as well. And he was absolutely brimming with hate. He would fuck whomever he wanted fueled with his hate for Naruto, and he would make it as public as possible, so Naruto would know what it felt like.
-xXx-
to be continued...
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The Thin Line Between Love and Hate - COMPLETE