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Read the Fine PrintChapter OneHow it Began	By : YaoiSmutMaster Category: Naruto > Yaoi - Male/Male Views: 1157 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own any Naruto characters, nor do I profit from this story. Naruto belongs to Masashi Kishimoto, who has a younger twin brother.

Chapter List
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Disclaimer:
I own none of these characters. I write the characters according to my own
views about them. In addition, I write them how I think they will react in
the situations I place them in. So please refrain from leaving reviews
stating they are OOC, since each person interprets such things differently.

First thing first, this fic is not possible without the amazing beta
skills of kakashizgirl I love her ~nods~

Warnings this chapter:

Plotless, Insane, Lacks Common Sense, AR, Bad Language and Very Bad Humor-

.)

Read the Fine Print
Chapter
One � How it Began

�There it is!� shouts Kiba, pointing
fervently ahead.
Kiba, Sasuke, Naruto, and Lee have been traveling for
about three days now, searching for an old temple in the middle of a colorful
forest in the Land of Rain.

Coming to a stop a couple of feet away, they gaze around
the area. It is all quite shocking to find such an open clearing, in such a
dense forest area.

�There�s no name on it,� Sasuke says, starting to travel
around the long forgotten wood and stone structure.

�Well, look how old it is,� Naruto points to the top of
shrine, �the roof doesn�t exist anymore, probably turned to dust.

Noticing how low to the ground the shrine is they wonder
if there is meaning. In addition, there are three visible stone stairways; is
there one in particular they should choose?

Folding his fair toned arms across his chest, Sasuke
makes the decision.

�I�ll take the front one, Naruto take the left. Kiba go
with Lee, be careful there may be traps.�

Going cautiously up the ten-foot stairways, they all
breathe a sigh of relief when they get to the top without incident.

Walking through their respective entries, they are
welcomed with more nature. Beautiful wild flowers and thick emerald vines
breaking through the floor and walls. With the roof completely gone, the shrine
looks primordial.

On the far left wall Sasuke spots something peculiar,
going closer towards it, he sees an engraved slab. Brushing away the foliage,
he sees that the slab is more like connected panels.

�Look at this;� nodding his head toward the panels,
�we�re at the wrong one.�

Three mouths drop open in pure astonishment. They went
through hell getting into Rain country, since the land was always in turmoil.
Civil War here, political coup there, the word unstable did not even cover it.

Now to find out they risked their lives on a supposed
�easy� mission, only to find that the one shrine they have come across in
almost two days, is the wrong one!

�Fucking stomp me now,� Kiba says in a hushed voice.

Naruto holds his head in both hands, so as not to bash it
repeatedly into the floor.

Lee, always the optimist, gives a little hope, by using
the discovery of the slab.

�It�s not a total waste, at least we can explore.�

�Our mission is not to explore, but to retrieve!� Kiba
bellows.

�He�s right our mission is quite specific and straight to
the point,� Sasuke pinches the top of his nose, trying to ward of an incoming
migraine.

Their mission: find the Shrine of Amatsu Mikaboshi.
Search and take the summoning scroll of Controllable Darkness... that scroll is
supposed to be the item on Orochimaru�s list of destructive artifacts. Once
used, thousands if not millions of bats, will be at your disposal. The sky
becoming midnight black for days, weeks at a time, on a whim.

�What away to spend a birthday!� Naruto, who had just
turned 15 yesterday, pouted. "Battling an overgrown forest!"

�Don�t worry. We will help you celebrate properly, once
back in the village!� Lee says, flashing a 100-watt smile.

Taking a closer look at the slab, Sasuke sees a seal that
has a white crane on a tortoise shell.

�Cranes symbolize fertility, right?�

He brushes away hanging flowers from the top of the seal,
and seeing writing, Sasuke calls the other boys over.

�What�s it about?� Naruto tries to look over Sasuke�s
shoulder.

Feeling the blonde-haired boy�s hot breath on his neck,
he begins to feel irritated.

�I don�t need a steam bath, moron!�

Backing up, Naruto sticks his tongue out. Sasuke can
be so mean!

�Then get the hell out of the way!�

Rolling his coal black eyes in exasperation, he moves to
the side. Keeping ahead of the other ninjas showing it is still his
find.

Once everyone has a good spot, Sasuke reads the
inscription.

All those that wish to reproduce more of who they are,
All those that seek natural immortality,
All those that desire stronger lines,
Welcome to the Shrine of Ame-No-Uzume!

�Ame-No-Uzume�,� Lee�s eyebrows scrunch up in thought,
�Oh! The Goddess of Fertility!�

�So what? The slab is promising fertility. I�m not
shooting blanks... don�t need it.� Sticking his chest out, Kiba begins to strut
away.

�It�s not just promising that!� Sasuke is enthralled
already with the slab. �It�s speaks of producing stronger offspring.�

�That sure can�t hurt, I�m in!� Naruto dances around
singing, �I�m going have a lot of kids� repeatedly.

�I�m not sure if I am fertile or not,� Lee says quietly,
�but if I can guarantee it, then I will.�

Everyone looks at Lee then, his eyes downcast and mournful.
It suddenly becomes a reflective moment for them. Lee and Naruto have no family
whatsoever; they are truly alone in the world.

Even though, Sasuke�s clan is gone, he still has a
brother out there. However, his brother ended the clan.

Kiba has tons of family and feels bad for the others.

�Well if all of you are going for it, so will I� showing
fangs in a feral grin, �I�m no spoil sport.�

Having it settled that all of them would participate,
Sasuke finishes reading the slab.

In order to attain the above, one must first give a kiss
of chakra to the seal.

�Pucker up jackass!� Snickering, Naruto makes kissing
noises, enjoying Sasuke�s irritation.

Deciding to ignore the blue-eyed idiot, he tries to
figure out how to get chakra to his lips.

�All you have to do is concentrate on your lips, till you
feel them tingle,� Kiba can be quite smart when he chooses.

Taking the Inuzuka�s advice, Sasuke begins to focus his
chakra to his mouth. Starting to feel the tingly sensations, he moves his head
to the seal... then he stops cold!

�What�s wrong Sasuke?� Lee looks at him with concern
etched into his features.

�When was the last time this thing was cleaned?� The
Uchiha says, wrinkling his nose in disgust.

�You are such a prissy!� Naruto shakes his head amused at
Sasuke�s prim and proper attitude.

�Unlike you asshole, I care where my lips go!� A devious
glint suddenly lit Sasuke�s eyes. �But since you don�t, you�re more than
welcome to kiss my ass!�

Kiba howls with laughter, while Lee blushes at the use of
such language.

Naruto on the other hand is not amused at all, �Fuck you
and the horse you rode in on!�

While Kiba rolls on the floor in mirth, Sasuke and Naruto
continue to throw curses in each other�s direction.

Seeing all this as a waste of time, Lee uses common
sense. He cleans the seal in less than a minute.

�It�s ready for you Sasuke.�

They all freeze, swiveling their eyes to the clean seal.
Even the aloof raven has the decency to look sheepish.

�Uh�yeah, thanks Lee.�

Sasuke approaches the seal again, feeling a little
nervous; he gently presses his soft lips to the artifact. Instantaneously, the
seal glows and moves a quarter of the way down the slab.

�Whoa,� they all say with awe.

�It moves with just chakra no jutsu,� Lee eyes the slab carefully.

�Maybe it�s some ancient chakra technology,� Naruto says.

Sometimes the prodigy wonders how the blond boy can
breathe, because obviously there is nothing up there.

�Chakra technology?!� Deciding he cannot even look at the
buffoon, Sasuke tunes once again to the slab.

All of them cannot help the feelings of excitement and
fear coursing through their bodies. No one they know of has ever come across
something like this. They feel like Indiana Jones, ninja-style.

�Well what�s next?� Kiba is trying to keep his cool. Even
though he wants to dance around like an idiot, Naruto has already done the
honor.

Clearing his throat with importance, Sasuke reads the
ancient panel.

A sweet
and strong kiss you have, traveler.

�Like he needs a bigger chip on his shoulder,� Naruto
sneers in Sasuke�s direction.

�Your jealousy as usual, is quite amusing.�

Sasuke turns back to the writing, missing Naruto flipping
him the bird.

From this moment on, the seal will only move when the
kiss has a taint of each previous jutsu.
For all to go well you must do each jutsu.
This is only for the brave.
Are you one of the brave?

Of course they all were, the testosterone passing through
their veins, demands no less.

�Is everybody going through it to the very end?�

Naruto glares at Sasuke, �Damn right I am! I can�t let
you have all the glory!�

�Inuzuka equals bravery, hehe-- it�s in my blood.�

They look at Lee, who has been very quiet. He looks so
forlorn; they can swear they see tears forming.

�What�s the matter Lee?� Naruto puts a comforting arm
around his shoulders.

�I only have one of the two things required,� he says
shakily, �bravery, but no chakra.�

A solemn cloud descends upon them. How can they leave Lee
behind? Since he, more so then anyone else besides Naruto, deserves such a
great guarantee.

This is why; it is always good to know a prodigy. Sasuke
comes to the rescue!

�Since you know the Lotus technique, you can open up your
heart chakra. This will release your own power.�

�But he needs chakra concentrated in his hands, in order
to do the hand signs.� Kiba points out.

�Well that�s where we come in. One of us will do the hand
signs with him. Just don�t put thought into it; let him do the concentration.�

�I think we should try it out first.�

Naruto goes behind Lee and puts his hands on top of his.
�You know how to do hand signs right?� Lee nods. �Well do the Flame-No-Jutsu.�

Lee does the hand signs with Naruto, creating a tiny
flickering flame in the palms of his hands. Gleefully, he bear hugs Naruto
tightly.

�Thank you, thank you!� He shouts, �Sasuke no wonder
you�re considered one of the best!�

Keeping his aloof look in place, Sasuke beats his blush
back with a broom as Naruto snorts at him with disrespect.

�All right, since that�s taken care of, can we get back
to it?� Kiba could not keep still. He loved learning new jutsus.
Especially ones no one had used in like forever.

The Uchiha finishes the panel, eager as well to try this
new jutsu.

If true, complete this first jutsu, once done you will
feel heat in your loins.
Worry not; this first jutsu is preparation for the
following ones.

The boys do the hand signs, Naruto helping Lee with his.
They all feel the heat the panel spoke of, except Kiba feels a little more than
that.

�Damn! My balls feel like they�re on fire!� Kiba clutches
his groin with one hand, using the other to fan them.

Naruto starts to beam a goofy look, �You shake my
nerves and you rattle my brain,� he starts to sing.

The other boys do the chorus, �Do wap wap.�

�Too much love drives a man insane,� Bushy Brows starts
to do the twist.

�Do wap wap.�

�You broke my will, but what a thrill,� Sasuke
dramatically puts his fist to his down turned head.

Kiba does the end part with a thrust of his petite hips.

�Goodness, gracious, great balls of fire!�

They all look at each other, before busting out laughing
at their silliness.

�It was so cool that Jiraya-sama let us listen to his
record collection,� Lee says, catching his breath.

�Yeah, they had some pretty cool American songs to dance
to back then,� Kiba turns his back to them trying to peek at his privates.

�Everything still seems to be in working order,� he sighs
with relief.

�Well, Tsunade-obaa-san, says it�s not that she�s old,
but that it just takes longer for stuff to get here,� blue eyes wide with
innocence.

Sasuke and Kiba look at each other, then at Naruto.

�It�s called denial,� they both say at once.

�You�re probably right; she hates it when I call her
obaa-san,� Naruto looks thoughtful.

�Well, you�re only as old as you feel,� Lee pumps up a
fist, �to the Power of Youthful Thinking!�

The others groan and give the boy with a bowl-cut amused
looks. They could not help but be happy though, at least Lee was truly starting
to enjoy himself. Sorrowful and mournful looks just did not look right on him.

�Time to give a kissy to the seal, asshole,� Naruto just
loved rubbing Sasuke the wrong way!

Giving the blond butt-head the slit throat signal, the
raven presses his lips once again to the seal. As before, it lights up and
moves another quarter of the way down.

Massaging his lips first, all that chakra there making
them feel as if they had fallen asleep, Sasuke begins the reading of the next
chore.

You are indeed very brave, you will benefit greatly.
Now you must think of one who is either friend or foe,
blood or wave, which has power such as you or is greater than you are.
Keep their image strongly in your mind when performing
this jutsu.
Remember the number that appears in your mind�s eye, very
important!

�Everybody ready?� Sasuke eyes each one as they nod.

�You have that person clear in your mind?� he asks
sternly.

�Can we go ahead and do it already?� The Uchiha was
irritating Naruto. �Why don�t you make sure your mind is focused, bastard?�

Sneering at Naruto, Sasuke prepares himself. �Don�t
forget to remember that number.�

The young shinobis initiate the jutsu. They all sport a
blush once they finish.

�It was like, he was inside of me,� Kiba says toeing a
crevice in the floor.

Naruto has no desire to focus on that mutual feeling.
Moreover, being nosy as hell, he asks the others their numbers.

�Mine is seven,� Kiba says proudly.

�I wonder what importance the number has,� gazing in
thought, Lee says, �My number is three.�

�Hey! You got the same number as me!� Naruto claps
happily.

�Five is mine,� Sasuke was a little sour that his number
was only second highest.

�Oh get over it bastard!� Naruto chastises him, �Be lucky
you got a number at all!�

Before Sasuke can give a classic retort, Kiba breaks in.

�Hey let�s get this going again, I can�t wait to see the
next jutsu!�

He was not the only one, they were all quite curious to
see the next challenge, wondering if they would get any clue to how fertile
they would become.

Getting his lips ready, Sasuke bends his head once again
to the seal, giving it a quick peck he backs away to see the new development.

You are now on the last stairway to obtain your
greatness.

�This is it, the last jutsu,� Naruto says nervously.

�Yeah,� the rest of them agree with nervousness as well.

You have shown great determination thus far.
Can you triumph this last obstacle?
If you do this last justu, what feels like eternity, will
only be a moment.
Show your true worth!

The young men do the hand signs, but because of what
happens, Naruto barely finishes helping Lee.

The pain hits them like a 4000-ton asteroid, and even
that does not truly describe it! It feels as if their insides are being ripped
to shreds, just to be put back together piecemeal.

Even the usually indifferent Uchiha cannot contain his
agonizing screams. A misery that only suicide can erase drapes over Naruto.
Like an animal on its last leg, Kiba howls and snarls, slamming himself against
a wall. Poor Lee curls into a fetal position, crying like a newborn babe.

The little ninjas literally feel their balls shrivel,
only to feel a fierce tearing where their sack was. Even the boys'
rectums receive no mercy. A drill would have felt better.

A stinging becomes a raging inferno in their chest. The
terror they already feel intensifies. Was this a heart attack placed upon them?

Only one thought they share through this inhumane ordeal:
What have they ever done to deserve this hell?

It all comes to a sudden halt. The shinobis cannot
believe it! It was as if none that they experienced has ever happened! Was it a
dream? Hell no! They knew it was real, but why did they not feel any remnants?

The ordeal leaves them shivering and shaking. They don't
know what to think or believe. Soon they do though, when the most high-pitched
scream a person can muster, echoes throughout the shrine.

�My bullocks!� Kiba�s pants are around his ankles, and he
is grasping something that is no longer there.

Sasuke, Naruto, and Lee are terrified. None of them want
to know if they too, have lost the family jewels.

Kiba by now, in a state of pure panic, is clutching his
groin crying his eyes out. What would made it comical, if the situation wasn�t
so horrid, was his jumping up and down like a two year old having tantrum.

Sasuke walks up to Kiba and backhands him. Kiba at first
looks at Sasuke like he has lost his mind, but thinks about his behavior and
decides to look contrite.

�Where did they go?� Naruto looks around himself and even
shakes his pants.

�It�s like they just disappeared.� Sasuke now has his
pants down in wonder of this development.

�What is this hole for?� Lee using his flexibility stares
at the now vacant spot. �It�s so small.�

�Damn, can�t even get my pinky in there!� Yet, Kiba
continues to poke it.

�Then what the fuck is the point in having it!� Naruto is
extremely unhappy about having an extra and apparently useless hole.

Lee has an idea, but his mind refuses to fathom it.
However, he is quite happy when Sasuke says there has to be another panel.

Sending a quick prayer to Kami, Sasuke prepares his lips
for the last time, kissing the seal with more passion than usual, he almost
sobs with relief when it moves.

You have now attained all that you desire.

�Fuck you man! Losing my nuts was way not in the desire
arena!� Kiba can barely contain his hysteria, again.

You are most worthy and brave.

�You can take those compliments and stick them up your
ass!� Naruto yells, as if the slab can actually hear him.

A man of your spirit is quite rare indeed.

�We�re rare alright, how many men have their sac
disappear!� Sasuke rolls his eyes at how this could have happened to them.

Now you must go to the man whose image you kept during
the second jutsu.
He is the only one who may give you his seed.

�Please tell me it�s not saying what I think it�s
saying,� Sasuke went paler than usual and began to tremble.

�I might well slit my throat now, �cause he damn sure
will, if I come to him asking for his sperm.� Naruto contemplates which would
be more effective, the kunai, or the shuriken.

Kiba slaps them both out of his hands. �Don�t give up
yet! There may be a way out of this!� Even though he knows that this is
probably a bad dream without end.

What a great honor you have bestowed upon him! This
should strengthen bonds or make new ones!

�Humph, you mean make new graves,� Sasuke still cannot
stop trembling; he holds his knees to keep them from knocking.

It is our hope; you remembered the number that flashed
through your mind.
That number dictates how many births you can have.

�Well at least something went our way Lee,� Naruto is
still contemplating suicide; he is just keeping it more under wraps.

Kiba on the other hand, drops to his knees, �Seven
fucking ass kids,� he says quietly, �Kami strike me now, please!�

�Aren�t you all missing it?!� Lee shouts, �We are the
ones who get pregnant!�

�Yes, we know that,� Sasuke�s speech is quite shaky. �But
what�s done is done; we just need to know all we can.�

Kiba puts both his hands behind his head, and pulls it
down between his legs and lets out a mournful sound.

A sound they wish to make as well. What were they now?
Men who were able to give birth? Alternatively, were they women with dicks?

If you felt an inner glow in your loins during the first
jutsu, praise Goddesses!
You are indeed strong, for you can have more than one
child at a time!

�If they weren�t all long gone, I would kill them myself
painfully, for coming up with this shit!� Kiba looks up from his legs and
snarls.

�Mine g-gl-glowed too,� Naruto stutters; it just all
seems to get worse for him. Suicide is becoming less an option and more a
necessity!

�Mine didn�t,� Lee says a little too cheerfully.

�Must. Be. Nice.� Sasuke says coldly as Lee is the only
one free of that curse.

Now become with child within 90 suns.
If you do not, you will become a eunuch, painfully.

Sasuke had suddenly develops a tick. Even after all he
has seen and done in his life, this in his opinion topped it all!

�What the fuck?!� He screams, literally.

�You mean we will get punished if we don�t get pregnant!�
Naruto joins Sasuke in screaming.

�We have to accomplish it, in less than 90 days,� Kiba
feels a total helplessness cover him.

Your gestation period will be 4-6 months, the more
children in the womb the longer the gestation.
May you have many blessings and much happiness!

Kiba is just about to smash it to bits, when Sasuke puts
a hand on his head.

�Don�t! Maybe we won�t be the only ones
to suffer this,� he said winking evilly.
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Read the Fine PrintChapter OneHow it Began