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The Proud Green Bet	By : Gaby Category: Naruto > Het - Male/Female Views: 2715 -:- Recommendations : 0 -:- Currently Reading : 0
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Chapter List
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The Proud Green Bet

Author�s Note: I hope you enjoy this little porn-comedy fic
I whipped up. I love Tsunade; I can
both identify with her and be attracted to her� an odd mix. Gai�s just cool, in an odd funny way. The eyebrows, the hair, the clothes�
heh. Anyway I hope you find it funny
and erotic and entertaining. It would
be better�I was going to show it to a friend who�s very smart and critical for
a beta before posting it; that would�ve been ideal�however, I let the lemon get
away from me! I am just frustrated with
the lack of good sexy Tsunade fanfic and fanart. (She�s very cool, and is there partly to add sex appeal to the
series, guys! Get out the keyboards and
art supplies and let�s make some pr0n!)
Anyway, the damn lemon (chapter 5) swelled to 5 1/3 pages of unabashed
smut, and now I�m afraid to show it to anyone I know. They�ll think I�m a sick sex-starved pervert. I�m not, I have a girlfriend of several years. Anyway� you people out there: read and
review and don�t be afraid to pour on the criticism!
Thank you, and enjoy.

�Absolutely not! I can�t believe you would think that!� Sarutobi Asuma was shocked and indignant, as
well as more than a little drunk.
Kakashi was
undeterred. �I�ve known him for a long
time. He just seems that way to
me. I mean, look at the gestures, the
language, the clothes� and how close he is to that one student of his.�
He slammed
his fist on the bar. �Close to his
student?! That should be a good thing,
damn it! Are you going to accuse him of
being a pedophile too? I know you�re
such a veteran you�re afraid to care about anyone anymore in case they get
killed, but some people��
Kurenai, flushed and slurring her words, cut
him off. �Asuma, Gai is totally
gay. You�ve got to be blind not to see
it! He wears a skin tight green
jumpsuit. He looks like he has a
whole breakfast in his crotch�age age and eggs with a few hash browns scattered
around on top. He hugs, and cries, and
when I asked him out he got nervous and said no.�
�So he
doesn�t want to date you, and he�s a little weird! Doesn�t mean he doesn�t want to date any woman.�
Kakashi
looked weary of the argument. �Sigh�
Asuma, you�re trying very hard not to see this. Does it scare you or something?�
�What the
hell is that supposed to mean?�
�What the
hell is what supposed to mean?�
The jounins
looked up as Tsunade sat down next to Kakashi and ordered a drink. �Barkeep, a Sake Bunshin,
please. Make it a triple.� In a puff of smoke, the bartender produced a
threesome of identical shots. Tsunade
turned to Asuma again. �What�s what
supposed to mean?�
�Hokage-sama�
uh� nothing. We were just discussing another jounin.�
Kurenai
brashly spelled it out. �Asuma doesn�t
believe that Gai is gay.�
�Gai, gay? Of course not! He�s just� Gai.�
�You too,
Godaime-sama?� Kakashi asked
tiredly. �I�ve known him for
years. He has a sort of strange
obsession with me, you know. I am sure
he is gay.�
�Not a
chance! I can spot a gay male. Listen to your elders.�
�Ha! See?
The Hokage agrees with me!� said Asuma.
�Respectfully,
Asuma, the last Hokage agreed with us and so do most of the students. You guys lose.�
�Lose? Bah!
There�s no way you can be sure he isn�t straight. For one thing�� Tsunade swallowed her last sake
bunshin��what men has he been with, hmm?�
No one
could answer.
�Ha! You see?
Barkeep, another drink, please.
Something dry, and that won�t put me to sleep. Hmm� make it a Desert Coffee. And more ice this time!
Damnit! I wanna Rocks.�

As the
night wore on, the four argued endlessly over whether Gai was gay, bi, or just
strange. They were all getting quite
sloshed, even Kakashi, who had learned to sip liquids through small holes in
his mask. As the debate grew louder, he
began to realize that something needed to be done.
�Oe�
listen, you guys, and Tsunade-sama.
This isn�t the first time this argument�s been had. It�s a long-running thing. We�ve been arguing over it for years and
it�s time something was done. We�ve got
to settle this once and for all or we�re going to end up getting in a
chakra-powered bar fight over it.�
Tsunade
raised an eyebrow. �Hmm. What�d you have in mind? Barkeep, a ninja slash. With lemon!�
�We�ll test
him.�
�Ha! Test him, eh? And if he� �passes?� Then
you�ll be eating your words, Cockatoo.�
Kurenai
cautioned her. �Godaime-sama, don�t be
overconfident. I know this man. I�ve sort of �tested� him before and he
passed with flying rainbow colors.�
�Hn. Why don�t you put your money where your
mouth is, Yuuhi Kurenai and Hatake Kakashi?�
Kakashi
raised his eyebrow. �How much did you
have in mind?�
And thus,
it began.
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The Proud Green Bet