Click Here!

Reviews for Secrets and lies

By : brook13baby13
  • From prostochudo on November 01, 2007
    WOW! Thank you... It's easy and interesting story! =)
    Report Review

  • From shirilyle on November 01, 2007
    that was a good chapter what goin to happend next and who punch naruto? can't waite for the next chapter plez continue
    Report Review

  • From Dragon7 on November 01, 2007
    Grate chapter!!!! I'm so happy that you are back and writing again. I can’t wait to read the next chapter so please keep on writing and UPDATE SOON.
    Report Review

  • From shirilyle on October 02, 2007
    what goin to happened plezz continue
    Report Review

  • From ANON - mezau on July 09, 2007
    First off, you desperately need a beta. If you can't find one, at least read over what you've written to see if it makes sense. You jump from future tense to present tense. You need to change things like She jumps up; in chapter 10 to She jumped up. Another example is this part right here

    Both Guards took hold of Naruto arms and shoulders, pushing him out of her offices. Naruto looks back at her as they walked down the hall to the cell.

    Should be

    Both guards took hold of Naruto's arms and shoulders, pushing him out of her office. Naruto looked back at her as they walked down the hall to the cell.

    There are quite a few omitted words throughout the entire story and the jump back one year to a meaningless mission only to jump forward five times to land back at the present. It just could have been done better in general if you wanted to show what Naruto went through over his meaningless one year mission

    It also doesn't make sense that after a supposed night of sex with Naruto that 'Kanami' would pass out and Naruto would put her unconscious body in a CHAIR instead of on a bed.

    This really, really needs a lot of work. Read it over, DO it over. Find someone to beta and fast.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Anon on May 25, 2007
    muahaha he's been in that damn closet way too long! he needs some time out! i like this story so far, its so cute!~
    Report Review

  • From Dragon7 on May 24, 2007
    Grate chapter!!!! I hope Naruto and Sasuke get together soon. I can’t wait to read the next chapter so keep on writing and UPDATE SOON and please try not to take so long to post the next chapter..................
    Report Review

  • From Dragon7 on May 16, 2007
    Grate chapter!!!! I can’t wait to read the next chapter so please keep on writing and UPDATE SOON.
    Report Review

  • From HumanInfiltrator on May 15, 2007
    HOT!
    Report Review

  • From TellMeImPretty on May 15, 2007
    AHHHHH thats was GREAT
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Anon on May 13, 2007
    ZOMG awesomeness!!! Love this so much, I LOVE SnJ!Sasuke, which is not that common in fics, and NaruSasu is my fav. pairing of all time, so this makes for a really lovely story :3333 *hearts* Please update soon! ^___^
    Report Review

  • From on May 09, 2007
    aekgbjsarbgsjer
    this is such a good story
    oh god PLEASE update
    cant wait for sasuke to realize that naruto knows his dirty little secret
    XD


    JA NE!
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Oreo on May 07, 2007
    That kiss was so sweet. I like how Naruto carries himself in this fic.
    Report Review

  • From narutovixen383 on May 02, 2007
    I am definitely curious to see where this goes. I mean Naruto knows it's Sasuke so I'm dying to find out when he'll admit he knows and of course I'm waiting for the bed scene but who isn't? And of course there would be nothing wrong with possibly throwing in some jealousy on Naruto's part possibly leading into it. I always enjoy a little jealousy for them to realize how much they care about the each other! Keep them coming!
    Report Review

  • From Dragon7 on April 27, 2007
    Great chapter!!!! When are Sasuke and Naruto going to get together? I can’t wait to read the next chapter so please keep on writing and UPDATE SOON.
    Report Review

T.O.S. | Content Guidelines | DMCA Info | F.A.Q. | Facebook | Tumblr | Abuse | Support | Contact | Donate

Click Here!