Good, Hinata finally can accept and admit that Sasuke is much better at sex than Naruto is. I do still hope that she seriously apologizes to Sasuke for that. Maybe even offer to let him do something with her as he likes as a way of making it up, and Sasuke suggests anal. Hinata's ass will never be the same again after that. 

LMAO XD Oh god, such a classic case of misunderstandings. A guy and a girl go into a forest together and come out all sweat and dirty, but not dirty in the perverted way. Persoanlly, I feel Boruto wouldn't go and ask someone to tell him what should be done but rather go and get to the bottom of things. But I guess it needed to be set up that Himawari shows that she's got a thing for Sasuke.

... Okay, I won't lie. That moment when Sasuke was leaving and thinking that he was certainly not running away made me laugh a little too hard. 

I do like how Sasuke is still trying to give lessons to Naruto and Hinata. But personally, feels like Sasuke should have avoided Hinata a bit more. Guess he didn't realize that he did give some damage to Hinata and thinks that she's just fine. And we even see signs that Hinata is losing interest in Naruto for sex, as she even refused sex with him there and instead going right back to thinking on Sasuke. 

At this rate, maybe one or two chapters more left before Hinata just loses it.

Yup. Definitely needs different name. While fic goes through same milestones as previous fic, it follows different path.

Sorry if my previous review seemed blunt, I didn't mean it to come off that way, I just didn't think Hinata was one to be rude to someone like that. So Hinata, Himawari and Naruko will all be fucked by Sasuke again then? I'm interested, what made you decide to remaster the story? It feels like this is kinda going down the same route.

Hinata insulting Sasuke like that seemed OOC and just came out of nowhere to me, it seemed to be used just as a plot device to get Sasuke to try and break her. Other than that I enjoyed it greatly, not really sure I like the idea of Naruko being involved again though.

No bad. As good as the original. Wish Sasuke broke other females as well tho. Or have Naruto do the breaking X3

I like this story. I would like it if you could update this one before the others. Thanks.

I realized how bitchy my previous review sounded lol. Sorry haha. Mb.

I'm just really disappointed how they show adult Naruto. I always thought he would be the fun, weird uncle to every kid hokage while maintaining a "wise beyond his years" persona where he lets slip pearls of wisdom learned from Hiruzen (when he was a kid) and his philosophical talks with Jiraya. While Sasuke would be the one who had like 3-4 kids who he strictly but lovingly trained and were the most powerful kids in the village due to Sasuke's passion about redeeming the Uchiha.

For such passionate people, while they would calm down with age. They're both just depressing to watch. I kinda figured Naruto as a kinder, more actively caring character who wanted to keep on fighting amazingly strong people (kinda like a wiser, smarter Goku) while Sasuke would be the Vageta (making the Uchiha name known in the world again).

The cluster fuck they made it into just makes it agonizingly depressing. 

There. Now you have the reason why I'm being so bitchy. Weird thing to rant about on a porn(ish) site but there you go

To be completely honest I've been struggling with this genre of smut.

I realize that this might be what people get off on, and to be clear, I enjoy it too at times. Recently though, it's all there is that's available with the characters I'm most familiar with. It's mostly just cuckolding stuff or massive harems. 

Some of your other work, like spot light and the one with Satsuki were a breath of fresh air. But I feel like it's getting a bit repetitive.

Not knocking your writing. It's progressing well. But idk. I don't really identify with any of the male characters. And I find the general depiction of females unhelpfully degrading.

Not going anywhere near SJW. We all have our fetishes and darker sides. Just saying I'd appreciate some hot and heavy stuff that I could read with a FWB while getting it on (I know it sounds Hella weird when I say it like that lol)

I'm sure you know I pitch random ideas. And I'm sure this one has never been done.

How about having Jiraya as a main character? Even though Naruto and Tsunade made fun of his pervyness let's not forget that he wrote those novels from experience and not (or even most) of it wasn't voyeurism. He had women hanging off of him and attempting to seduce him (case in point he didn't get tied down to the woman village full of women) so it's obvious he got some major action. 

He's one of the most likeable and relatable characters in the story so I think a peek into his life style would be interesting.

He WAS a spy master after all, I always got a bit of James bond (ish) vibe from him, except that he used his blatant pervyness to hide behind and misdirect people from how strong he was. I also always thought that the way they killed Jiraya off was kind silly giving Nagato the advtange of home base, rannigan secrets and introducing his weird/imperfect? Sage mode was too many odds stacked against him. And Jiraya's obsessiveness with trying and dying to find out pain's secrets rather than taking the numerous chances he had to escape/retreat was dumb AF.

I'm not saying give Jiraya a harem. But try exploring him as "The gallant" Jiraya more. I'm sure a lot of women wanted to establish a REAL relationship with him and probably tried coercing him with sex, but I think that also gives a chance to explore the whole Tsunade/Jiraya act in a serious light would be a fun bit of literature.

I'm actually getting sick of how easily and frequently we see a submissive and easily sexually defeated Tsunade. I think what people tend to forget is that, after her being busty, beautiful and powerful she is also a leading medical expert. She probably knows more ways to pleasure the human body than ten-tens whole entire arsenal of weapons. 

Exploring her as a woman who could make men and women orgasm with but a few touches or force men to stay aroused for hours on end would be a fun challenge.

Having her find her equal in Jiraya would seal the romantic part of the deal. But you seem to favour Sasuke (although personally I find the development of both Naruto and Sasuke, especially in that crap Boruto to be immensely disappointing) so maybe you could have her teach him or something.

Good day man.

i have to admit I'm a little disappointed because all things point to hinata ending up like how she was in the previous story. I'm disappointed because her character in that story was a little confusing because at times it felt like she still loved naruto but in others she didn't want anything to do with him. I was hoping in this story there would be a more definite line that showed exactly how hinata felt about naruto. Since we have already seen a more slave version of hinata I was hoping for her to be a bit more like herself in this story or at least make exactly how she feels about naruto clear. You have great writing skills so I'm sure you'll think of someway to make her true feelings known. 

Ps: while my review seems a little naruto biased I won't lie I like naruto way better then sasuke, but I was hoping that this story would have more realism in the fact that someone who has been married for twenty years would not become a slave after having sex with another man a couple times.

Oh my god, Hinata. REALLY? That has to be the most retarded thing you have ever done, and possibly something I find to be VERY out of character for you.

Like really, aren't you attacking Sasuke and hitting him a little below the belt there? 

Why would you provoke and actually insult your husband's best friend there? Even Naruto is shocked that you would do something like that. Maybe you want to reject Sasuke so you don't succumb to his cock by insulting him, but still, to actually attack him in such a manner, you deserved what you got there, and you are lucky that Sasuke STILL held himself back. Cause if he wanted to, he could have continued to fuck you and even gangbang you. 

Anyways, to the earlier part, I do like how you had that Sasuke's immesen skill in sex is actually because he fucked a lot of women in the past. Bet Orochimaru was also intended to possibly make some new Uchihas for experimentation. Either way, Sasuke's fears that he might break Hinata since he's broken countless women before is something I feel should be taken more seriously. 

Oh well, now Hinata is already headed on the road to being Sasuke's cock slave. Good chapter. Can't wait to see how much further she'll go before she wants to make babies with him. ;3

For narutos "naruko" form can it not be perfect so if the pleasure is to much he turns back into naruto?? It'd add to the humiliation and hinata or sakura would find it hot?? when naruko does get with sasuke and they do anal "naruto" would pop back by accident or a Naru Trap version would be appropriate, just thought I'd give you that idea :) this is amazing thou I do hope sakura also gets into this more, I mean this might be called narutos fetish but sakura did ask sasuke to do it so she should also get a favor from naruto, I mean she is a medic nin so you also have plenty to work with there medical wise, I could also see sakura whispering stuff regarding size and how sasuke fucks hinata into narutos ear as he watch's hinata get pounded, also with naruto will there be any ass play

I liked the first story, but I think this fic is a definite improvement from the original.  One of the things I found lacking in the first fic is that the character motivations were weak overall.  Why did Sakura go along with it for years?  Why didn't Naruto or Hinata second-guess the arrangement, especially after Himawari got involved?  Sasuke was the main character, yet most of the time his actions were a mystery.  Sometimes I thought he was just being a good friend by going along with whatever the Uzumakis wanted, while others, I thought he might be a villain.  Without understanding what he really wanted, he was more like a convenient penis than a main character.

I think this story improves character motivations, which improves the character deelopment. Sakura's doing it out of friendship to Naruto and doesn't feel threatened by the Uzumakis (yet?)  Naruto's still got his fetish.  Hinata's getting the best of both worlds: her husband and good sex.  And Sasuke both feels like he owes Naruto and also wants to beat him at something.

I didn't like the dark ending of the previous fic, partially because I like happy ends (most of the time), but also partially because Sasuke enslaving Naruto didn't make sense to me.  Eventhough he didn't want to, Sasuke broke Sarada because it would undermine Konoha if people found out about the Uzumaki family sharing a lover.  But does that undermine Konoha any less than the humiliation of its Hokage suddenly turning into a woman with a cum addiction?  It was also surprising that Sasuke would suddenly destroy his best friend after being okay with their arrangement for over a decade.  At first I thought he did it as revenge for being forced to break Sarada, but that didn't seem to be the case.

If you still want to go the dark end route, you have the opportunity to set it up better in this story.  You could have the Uzumakis become increasingly unreasonable in their demands (so they aren't innocent parties in this either), until something happens which is the straw that breaks the camel's back.  Or you could just end it with everyone happily sharing their fetishes together.  :P

I'll just say one last thing since I'm sure this comment is getting too long already.  This is more of a personal preference than a writing issue, but I honestly didn't like Himawari in the previous story.  I hate all the next gen kids in general, but I especially hate Himawari.  Her character design is the worst and her personality is almost as bad.  It was a total turn-off for me to read her in sex scenes, so I skimmed all the parts of the story with her in it.

So in an effort to be honest, just letting you know off the bat I'm biased against her.  But even with that, I still don't know what she brought to the story?  It felt like anything you did with her, you could've just as easily done with Hinata.  The two women weren't all that distictive.  There's also the question of why both of the parents were getting off on her joining in.  I don't think Naruto's cuck fetish explains him being okay with incest (more or less), and it certainly doesn't explain Hinata's willingness to let the kid join in.

I also thought the story just flowed better when it was just the three adults.  (It's less characters to manage all at once, for one thing.  Sasuke isn't awkwardly running around from room to room taking care of various people.)  Sasuke giving Naruto and Hinata sex lessons was pretty entertaining, and if he sees the arrangement partially as a rivalry thing, an eventual power struggle between him and Naruto would also be pretty entertaining.  All of these things work better without an extra person in the room acting like the 3rd wheel (or in this case, the 4th wheel).  As a member of the next gen, Himawari is simply an outsider to the K11 dynamic.  Naruto turning himself into Naruko worked fine if you wanted to add an extra woman into the mix (and there's always Sakura as well).  LOL Naruko has the potential to create weird situations and humorous tension between husband and wife.  For example, if they start bickering over who gets Sasuke's cock first, or Hinata gets jealous over Naruko being prettier than her, or maybe Hinata discovers she likes seeing Naruko get pounded and suddenly understands Naruto's cuck fetish.

Anyway, those are just my thoughs on the matter.  Good luck on your rewrite, man!

Does Sasuke really need lube? Seriously, just shove his cock inside Sakura's cunt and she'll have her cum act as the lube. XD

The "nightmare" is a vision of what will happen. No matter what, Sasuke will end up claiming Hinata and they'll make their Uchiha Hyuga babies. But Naruto getting a hint of what's gonna happen soon is nice. Set's up a decent foreshadowing for later. And Hinata's thoughts drifting to Sasuke's cock and then her chanting later that Naruto is still better is good way of showing that she is resisting, and it is only a matter of time before she breaks.

LOL XD "I love you, too. Not that way." Unless he turns into Naruko, then you'll love your best friend. 

Question though: How old are Boruto and Himawari? I'm not sure of their age right now. 

The way that Sasuke was giving Naruto and Hinata sex lessons since they are only used to missionary is hilarious. Of course, nothing is weirder than how Goku admits that he never once kissed Chichi. I shit you not, Dragon Ball Super shows that Goku doesn't even KNOW what kissing is, so it proves he's never kissed Chichi. 

Oh, and different fic name would help greatly.

Please, no cum eating by no male. At least unless Naruto is Naruko, if you're willing to go that road here.