Adult-FanFiction.org : Naruto

Reviews for All In

By : momhuey8

From HalfFallenAingyl on May 30, 2011
Oh hell. That was absolutely BEAUTIFUL!! I've maintained from the very beginning that Sakura is a delusional, idiotic b*tch, so I absolutely love your portrayal of her! Don't get me wrong. I was equal parts raging mad and heartbroken at the things she was doing to a boy that adored her, all because she was crazy and totally believed she could have Sasuke if she could only get rid of Naruto. But still!!

Sasuke's OOC-ness bugged me a few times, I freely admit, but not enough for me to not be able to enjoy the masterpiece that is your story. It was very emotion-provoking, had me laughing in many instances, and ended with a very satisfying "aawwwwww" moment, also mixed with laughter, because Sasuke in jack*ss mode is hilarity itself. Yay, grown-up words! (Don't mind me. I've supposedly been a grown up for 11 years now. However, it's currently 10:27am and I've been up all night, so... The strange is coming out in spades :D)

Keep up the good work!
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From ANON - csad on August 03, 2010
This was a very interesting story, with all the NaruSasu sappiness one could ask for. The Sakura-bashing and lack of interaction with the rest of rookie nine were a rub, but nothing that couldn't be shrugged off easily. Same can't be said for something else though:

*You wrote a non-con scene in chapter 27 without any sort of warning, goddammit!* Gah! Even if it *did* consist of only a few sentences, couldn't you have had mercy with those of us who have triggers so bad they can't even write, let alone say the r-word synonym? Just a little bit of warning, be it in the summary or in that selfsame warning would have given me the option to either stop reading or somehow prepare/brace myself. You don't want to know what it took for me to calm down again.

I hope you care enough to not make this mistake again. Not that I will know, since I won't risk coming across something like this again in one of your stories, but it would help other people if you were to take this seriously. Please.
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From asm613 on January 23, 2010
((�You are so fucking hot when you�re crushing old people�s dreams and ambitions under your heel.�

�Hot enough to let me bend you over the Hokage�s desk and��

�That�s still my office�� The two laughed as they heard Tsunade yell from the other end of the hall. �And my desk.�)))___

You do funny, snarky and sarcastic dialog just as well as you do emotional, hot-sex and every day dialaog. Good Ending. Thanks for sharing

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From asm613 on January 23, 2010
((He hadn't been vigilant enough, but that was over))

At least now I know why you had Sasuke soooooo stuuuupid earlier in the story--to so easily dismiss sakura and to only "wonder" if she would leave them alone; instead of taking action to make certain she didn't interfere in their lives.
Because you wanted sakura to be the bad guy in hiding while the heroes were stupid.
The first 14 chapters were wow; but since i don't like sakura and it didn't seem like you were going to have them catch on anytime soon...i skipped ahead 11, 12 chapters to discover i was right. you must have filled sasuke and naruto's lives with lots of unhappiness and horrible things--glad i skipped to the end. I would have hated to read that many chapters of clueless good guys being beaten down.
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From asm613 on January 23, 2010
Well, now I know why the 'title' of the story. That was an awesome scene/dialog between sasuke and neji in naruto's hallway. very, very well done.

tsunade is #1 medic nin_how can she not know/sense sakura's strength/health and figure out she's faking it?? Or for that matter, any of the other chakra using medic nin in the hospital?

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From asm613 on January 23, 2010
((As he sensed the malice and agitation)) Along with mentioning Naruto's senses a couple of times; you also mentioned the characters being able to sense people's feelings around them. How could Sasuke and naruto not sense sakura's true feelings.

Yeah for burning of Sakura's tits. Yeah--i really don't like her.
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From asm613 on January 23, 2010
Naruto could smell sasuke's infection from inside the village while sasuke was 2 miles away from the village. But naruto couldn't smell sakura all those times she watched, even when she got close enough to hear; or when she was on the other side of the uchia wall-before she jumped behind naruto. he said he couldn't shut off the enhanced senses; they're on all the time. As much as i loved all of the previous story--this part with sakura fooling sasuke, naruto, itachi seemed unlikely. And it would have been nice if sakura's face was totally disfigured; nose burnt off, hair burnt off-never to grow back, lips and ears burnt off. Probably wouldn't serve your story; but I'd really have enjoyed it. When you had Naruto telling Sasuke the confrontation between he and itachi didn't make sense and he didn't know how he even got to the forest---i thought you were going to have sasuke go into his mind (since you introduced the technique earlier) and sasuke would see what really happened_sakura plotting and scheming, etc...it's a good idea--maybe in a later chapter.

Sasuke's dialog with the council and naruto while in the council chambers was brilliantly done.
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From asm613 on January 23, 2010
((�I appreciate your concern.� He leaned back into Naruto, grasped his hand and pulled a tan arm around his own chest. �However, I do not require your assistance.�))

((hugged him tight, wondering if the issue with Sakura was over for good.))

Sakura used all her strength to hurt Naruto for the 2nd time in front of Sasuke_but this time she also called Naruto ((�You�re a beast, a monster. I knew you were an animal, but this is the most unspeakable, most nauseating thing I�ve ever seen. You should be��))___hurting Naruto more than she could ever hurt him physically_

and all you have Sasuke do is call her name a couple times; thank her for her concern???; and then WONDER if this issue with sakura is over for good.....He did nothing to turn her away. He did not hurt her for hurting the man he loves more than anything. He did nothing to protect Naruto from the weapons, the broken leg, the chakra enhanced toss into the trees or the hateful words. I expected more of this Sasuke who so openly speaks his feelings to naruto and shows him his emotions and loves him and claimed him. He risked humiliation and his pride to convince Naruto of his sincerity and his love. How could he put so much effort into getting Naruto and put no effort in defending him from Sakura (because he knows Naruto won't fight against her-even to defend his life) or to make CERTAIN that sakura realizes that she can never have him. He saw how she insinuated herself into his home and life for those 10 days as if she were his wife. So he must know she's delusional. He knows she's been obsessed with him as long as naruto and sasuke have been obsessed with each other. and knowing what crazy things he and naruto would do for each other, to get the other, to keep the other.....It just makes me think that this genius that sasuke's supposed to be would do more to reflect sakura's attentions.

Other than that; loved the chapter. Thanks.

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From asm613 on January 23, 2010
OMG_OMG_OMG_OMG
I read this chapter slow and read it twice and spoke parts of it out loud.
This is Fu_king amazing. WOW.
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From asm613 on January 23, 2010
WOW_ again--remarkable with the dialog and the emotion your words evoke
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From asm613 on January 23, 2010
(("My leg healed ages ago.))___This reminds me--I forgot to review it in the chapter it happened. Why did Sasuke not yell at Sakura and tell her she was never welcome at his home again. She would have killed Naruto if he wasn't a vessel/sage; and even with that strength he has; she still broke his leg. Sasuke loves Naruto and is annoyed to hell by sakura--but you never had him put her in her place. He never made it absolutely clear that she had no chance with him. Even when he said to her 'we're friends'; he didn't say 'just' friends and 'never' anything more than that. I'm afraid she's going to turn into a psycho trying to get him and go totally insane when Naruto gets him. Plus Naruto told Sasuke that she's been treating him like that for years...If Sasuke had stood up for Naruto; he could have showed Naruto how much he cared about him and showed Sakura how little he cared for her.
The last couple of sentences. I can't tell if Naruto was joking or took Sasuke seriously. Plus; doesn't Sasuke want more than a fuck from Naruto_this would have been the perfect time to bring it up. Gotta keep on reading to see what happens.
It's an excellent story. I'm enjoying it very much. You're a very good writer. Thanks for sharing the story with us.
And you write wonderful dialog. The talks and banter between Sasuke and Naruto have been great. I like the way you've physically described your Naruto. Still not a clear physical picture of Sasuke in my head from what I've read-
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From asm613 on January 23, 2010
((�I thought my life was better because you�re in it.� He laced their fingers together and pulled back slightly. �It seems that the world is better because you�re in it.�

�Sasuke, what�s this all about?�

"I was sitting there playing shoji with Jomei and I thought, 'these kids are so lucky to have a Naruto.' Then I thought, 'if only I'd had a Naruto...�" Sasuke squeezed their palms together and bowed his head. "Then I realized that I did have a Naruto." He leaned their foreheads together again. "I just didn't appreciate it. That won't happen again."

Then he turned them back toward home, and didn�t call attention to the fact that they were still holding hands and Naruto was allowing it.))

I think this is the most wonderful couple of paragraphs I've ever read in any fandom. What a more than beautiful moment and sentiment.

WOW= really well done. Thanks for sharing.

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From ANON - animelover on January 16, 2010
totally cool! dont' know if you are planning a sequel, but if so, you have my vote! thank you for this story!
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From hieisdragoness18 on January 15, 2010
haha! nice ending!
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From ANON - richon on January 15, 2010
oh sasu and naru are too good with sakura !! I want to know how is the child of naru. I really enjoy reading your story. see you soon with another one
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