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Reviews for Pupil of the Serpent

By : Mario
  • From blukitsune on October 06, 2009
    Really like this! as for the impasse, do what you think is best, it's your story. or, if you can't decide, write what your muse feeds you, don't try to force it. :)
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  • From WolfGoddess77 on October 06, 2009
    Hmmmm . . . well, it's been eight chapters free of anything too questionable. Perhaps you could make Orochimaru attempt something, but not go all the way yet, you know? (And you really think I deserve reviews on my stories? [gets the WAFFs] I love reviews, like any writer, but people just don't seem to like OC stories. ^^') Anyway, back to yours. I don't think you made Anko change her mind too quickly about killing the ninja. The thing about kids is, if they're feeling guilty, all they need is reassurance from someone they look up to, and everything is fine again.
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  • From bob665 on October 06, 2009
    You know I am going to say that Anko reaction was kind of understandable. Well from her point of view at least. Again I was able to visualize the fight scene without a problem, so my compliments to you on that. As for your question I think that such things should grow out from the story as a necessity and as a result I think you are the only one capable of making that decision. Not helpful I know and I'm sorry, but that's what I believe.
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  • From ANON - Lynn on October 06, 2009
    Aww man leaving us at the kiss again! Poor Anko, killer instincts, but still just a kid. I wanna hug orochimaru now. He could be so snuggly but it wouldn't be worth it, he'd kill me lol.
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  • From wolfboy1988 on September 20, 2009
    This chapter was interesting. And I sorta saw Orochimaru tricking Anko, but it was done skillfully. Keep the story going!
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  • From WolfGoddess77 on September 16, 2009
    *wiggles restlessly in chair* I want to read mooore! I didn't think I would get so interested in this story; dark fics usually aren't my style, but I've gotten hooked on this one.
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  • From ANON - Lynn on September 15, 2009
    wow lol for a minute I thought anko was really gonna get that kiss. Poor Anko, I dunno there's something so creepy about the thought of young Anko and Orochimaru, but something so right too. guh maybe i'm just a pervert. Lol A++++ for this chapter.
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  • From bob665 on September 15, 2009
    An excellent chapter and pleasantly what I was not expecting. Your fight scene was pretty good.
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  • From ANON - Lynn on September 13, 2009
    Yay! another update! and the story was riveting as always. I was so happy to catch this update.

    take your time with the chapters, I know life is catching up to people right now, me included, but I will ALWAYS be eagerly awaiting the next chapter!
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  • From ANON - Wolfboy1988 on September 12, 2009
    Wow. This is a nice change of pace from the usual stories on here. Keep up the good work!
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  • From bob665 on September 12, 2009
    For a while I thought I miss the update, but when I checked and didn't find any I feared you had abandoned the story and that would have been a shame. Anyway, good chapter. I'm not sure how you are going to handle this stuff, but I hope you don't throw too much at her all at once.
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  • From ANON - Clover_Grl on September 11, 2009
    Wow. Just...wow.

    I love this story so far - brilliant characterization, with wonderful tensions bubbling under the surface of all the interactions. I especially like the way you write Orochimaru, not making him 'evil' in a 2D sense, but showing that he's got some depth to his character (personally, I think he's one of the most interesting characters in the series, and I'm usually disappointed by the simplistic portrayal of him in most fanfiction. Not here though, you've made my day by giving him some humor and kindness).

    I also like the chapter size - I tend to read when I'm meant to be doing something else, and short chapters are satisfying without taking up an unforgivable amount of time.

    I can't wait to see how things develop, looks like there might be a tipping-point of sorts coming up. I'm sure however things pan out I'll enjoy it; you write wonderfully!
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  • From bob665 on August 03, 2009
    I'm probably alone in this, but I feel some sympathy for Orochimaru.
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  • From ANON - Lynn on August 02, 2009
    Oh my god *sniffles* it made me cry. Poor Tsunade. I mean I knewthe story but man it got to me. Go to him Anko!
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  • From bob665 on July 26, 2009
    Your slow pace is actually a good decision. Considering what's going to happen to Anko she really does need some connection to him to suffer through it. It won't be healthy, but it will be understandable especially if you do a slow build up.

    Yes I think you're keeping the characters well within what we know of them at this time.
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