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Reviews for Pupil of the Serpent

By : Mario
  • From ANON - Lynn on October 22, 2009
    Hahaha awww anko had "the talk" so cute, they grow up so fast. One little thing though for future reference Anko wouldn't be reffering to Tsunade as 'Sama' yet because she's not the hokage yet. Even though tsunade is a relative of a past Hokage, the refference is given to one in power currently so she's just be "sensei" or "san" (sometimes even -dono). Depending on how Anko sees orochimaru he may be refferenced as "orochimaru-sama" by anko, but it would more likely be Kabuto who would call him that as kabuto is more of a servant than Anko who is a pupil. Sorry for the ramblings...so YAAAYYY Anko learning about sex! At least now we won't have "sword and sheathe" talks LMAO.
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  • From ANON - Mizuru007 on October 21, 2009
    Hrm...I wonder just how Tsunade explained sex to Anko. Must have been quite detailed if it went on for ten minutes and left the girl only saying "oh". xD
    And I understand your explanation on their relationship. Now...I already feel bad for her and nothing's even happened yet.

    Sorry this review is short! But I figure you're gonna get tired of my "It was great"s and my "Can't wait for the next one"s.
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  • From bob665 on October 21, 2009
    This chapter did seem a little lackluster although I did laugh when she learned what mistakes she had been making. I'm starting to feel a little bad for her being thrown from one emotion to the next. I think you should give her a little more time to transition though. One minute she's embarrassed and the next minute she's happy. Now given the news it's very clear to understand why she's happy, but it should've been a sort of embarrassed happiness I think.
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  • From WolfGoddess77 on October 21, 2009
    You have got to stop thinking your chapters aren't any good. If they wern't, why do you have so many people reading the reviewing, huh? :P

    Anyway, comments for this chapter . . . I'd be mortified if I was Anko; her asking Orochimaru to do that with her without even realizing what it was she was saying. Still though, makes for a good laugh or two.
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  • From zackthead on October 19, 2009
    since anko wants it so bad let Orochimaru fuck her long and hard the way shes begging so much like a little slut for
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  • From ANON - Lynn on October 10, 2009
    my god I'm so frustrated at this chapter because I want to tell anko to RUN but it's just a story gah! lol god orochimaru is so delicious in this story. just...GAH! I want it to happen to get it over with but I don't want it to end. lol. I eagerly await the next chapter.
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  • From ANON - vic on October 10, 2009
    i'm glad nothing happen but can't you do a time skip or something were she is like 14?or 13 1/2. To at least understand what is happening? i like it when anko read jiyara's books. Her impression of sex is very funny,
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  • From WolfGoddess77 on October 10, 2009
    I was wondering if I could have your e-mail address. I would like to talk with you more about our stories. Mine is wolf_goddess_77@yahoo.com
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  • From ANON - Mizuru007 on October 10, 2009
    I literally fell off of my bed in laughter from Anko's explanation about sex. It was so adorably naive that it helped flesh her character out, which is not always the easiest thing to do. Especially when having writer's block. Very, very happy with how the chapter turned out~. But now I wonder what's going to happen between Jiraya and Orochi. I know that you're not allowed to give out too much information on your story plans, but I'm extremely curious: Are you going to be taking the subservient slave approach with Anko?

    Oh! And I'm glad to know that I helped save such a brilliant story~! :D
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  • From blukitsune on October 09, 2009
    I like the way that this chapter turned out! sometimes we are all just a little bit too critical of ourselves. :)
    I like the fight scene there at the end, and how Anko 'learned' about the birds and the bees.
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  • From bob665 on October 09, 2009
    Well however you came to your decision let me raise my glass of Pepsi in respect. Anko sounded perfect as child trying to act grown up. Also describing Orochimaru's eyes as golden was interesting. It's a vivid comparison and not one I would've thought of before given his personality. However, there's a small error in your second to last paragraph. Also it's nice to see that you got over your author's angst-filled moment. It gives me hope that I can get over mine.
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  • From WolfGoddess77 on October 09, 2009
    *wicked grin* You just helped me out with a potential problem in my own story. I owe you one! Also, poor Anko, to be exposed to Jiraiya's books! XD Good thing she doesn't understand them, or she'd be scarred for life (Or turn out like Kakashi: infatuated with them).
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  • From ANON - Mizuru007 on October 08, 2009
    I got to the end of this chapter and literally started screaming "NOOOO!" over and over. xD. While I don't there should be explicit sex YET, I do say he should sorta test her. Kiss her and get all touchy-feely, but when it comes to the big moment, she'll tell him to do it ("Don't treat me like a child!"), but she'll be so panicky that he'll notice, roll over and go to sleep. At least that's what I'D write.

    By the way, I'm sorta in love with your story. Don't let it dieeeeee~
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  • From zackthead on October 07, 2009
    the next chapter i want to see Anko and Orochimaru make love
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  • From ANON - vic on October 07, 2009
    no please don't put a sex scene with an 9 year old anko! i can't read it anymore cause no 8 year old knows or wants sex really. a kiss is ok, but no more.
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