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Reviews for Sasuke you dirty whore

By : crimsoncloud
  • From LexieDarr on May 30, 2011
    ;) So much love for this story.
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  • From LexieDarr on May 30, 2011
    Breaks.....so....needed......ughhh.....you.....are.....one....EVIL.....FANTASTIC.....AMAZING......writer.....*dies*
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  • From HalfFallenAingyl on May 26, 2011
    *dies laughing* Oh god. I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I can't read any more *can't breathe* I made it to the end of chapter 2 and that's my absolute limit, man. Awesome job. I'm going to try and find something that's not funny in the least to get my brain working again. My poor, poor brain is currently broken.
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  • From tjrender on January 26, 2011
    Hi, I've read several of your stories and I really love your unique, clever writing style. I would never have imagined works that are so erotic while leaving the reader convulsing with laughter. Yet time and again you provide just that !
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  • From bloodshound on September 19, 2010
    kinky Ja
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  • From naruske on July 20, 2009
    that was amazing i love the couple and keep on writing I can't wait for the sequil
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  • From KeairaxSeiaa on June 28, 2009
    Well, I couldn't actually make it all the way through the story. I got about to the forest part in the first chapter before I had to stop.

    Just a few tips, in an attempt to give some constructive criticism, if that's alright:

    First, lines like this, "Naughty sweet pink fingertips..." are a classic sign of bad writing. Overlooking the lack of commas to separate the adjectives, you're really, really overusing adjectives in general. It's distracting to read and while one would think that adjectives would help to FURTHER immerse someone in a story, overuse of them typically has the opposite effect, getting the reader lost in a bunch of pretty words as opposed to getting them lost in your story. You do this a lot throughout your fanfic.

    Another thing was your "breaks." I only saw one before I stopped, but I'm assuming there are more. These basically amount to author's notes throughout your fanfic, which is generally considered bad form. Again, it's something that takes the reader out of the moment. It's a fanfic, not a play - if we want a break, we can take one ourselves; we don't need you designating breaks for us. Author's notes are best left to the beginning and end of a fanfic, where they won't interfere with the flow of the story.

    I hope this helps. Good luck with your continued writing!
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  • From Veja24 on May 23, 2009
    What. A Piece. Of BULLSHIT. This "fic" is.
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  • From NossdeSagel on May 22, 2009
    Omg. I'm pretty sure I just spontaneously came, that's the hottest thing I've read in a long time. Maybe ever. And the breaks were good, I was staining my shirt.
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  • From daughterofvirgo on May 14, 2009
    This is so funny and slutty. I love it. Uchiha incest has never been done so well. Bravo!
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  • From Munez on May 12, 2009
    It's hilarious how everyone's just horny as hell in this story. I love it, though. There's not enough slutty Sasuke stories to go around!
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  • From arabuzumaki on May 12, 2009
    lmao@ fugaku.. as expected of my children lol
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  • From squashkin10 on May 03, 2009
    I love how naughty this fic is, and I can't wait until the next chapter :D
    btw nice song choice for sasuke's tease you really are an awesome writer
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  • From SheaButter on May 01, 2009
    Haha, Sasuke is such a slut. I love him x3. And Pein singing; oh goodness, can't wait to read more :D
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