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Reviews for Education

By : ursweetheartless
  • From 7mizu8 on December 16, 2008
    yaaaay!!
    i really liked it
    it sortof had a melancholy feel throughout but it had a bright ending
    i liked the winter-ish setting of the story (coldness anywayz). in a strange way it added a type of warmth to the characters
    thanks for the awesome story! ^_^
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  • From on October 11, 2008
    *claps then dances* Woot! Go Sasuke, go Naruto.
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  • From ANON - Anon on October 09, 2008
    Omake: (*reads the title*) This should be good. ____ Heh—I wonder how often Sasuke runs through the school. ^^ Other people are wondering, “What’s his hurry? (*goggle*)” ^^ ____ Lol. Sasuke sees brother. About-face! ^^ ____ Aww, that’s sad, none of his family ever showed up for his own graduation. I wonder why. ó_ò ____ It’s funny how formal and embarrassed Sasuke is around Naruto. ____ Lol. Love it when Sasuke makes that hint about Naruto going off to school, and Naruto’s just giving him that sly look. >D ____ They haven’t been acting this way in public before now, have they? Otherwise Sasuke could get in trouble for doing that with a student. But technically Naruto’s not a student anymore, so it should be okay now. ____ Oh, LOL, Itachi just echoed my point! XDD ____ Is Itachi a stuffed shirt or what? I don’t see that very often. >D ____ (*pulls out megaphone*) And Uchiha Sasuke has spoken. All the uses of the name “Uchiha” seems a little wild to me. I mean, what century are they living in? ____ Oh, cute ending, with Itachi smiling and just leaving it at that. ^^
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  • From ANON - Anon on October 09, 2008
    Third Overture—Makin’ Love!: This should be the fun part! >w< ____ 5:30? Poor guy didn’t get much sleep then. ____ “Installed.” Sounds weird in that context. Think you can substitute it? ____ I wonder: if Naruto goes to school in Sasuke’s clothes, will people recognize them as Sasuke’s, or no? ____ When did Sasuke talk to the landlord? Last I heard, he missed the message of “4 missed calls.” ____ Love the mystery behind how Sasuke convinced the landlord to get the key early.
    “How on earth had he managed to get so much done [. . .] and now [. . .] he couldn’t get anything done.” I have no idea. That is pretty weird. ____ That bit about “following the rules” kinda makes Sasuke a bit OOC, doesn’t it? He skips out sometimes in the manga. ^^ ____ LOL, love his afterthought! XDD ____ Lol, “yelling at Itachi, Itachi of all people.” ^^ If that doesn’t make Sasuke jealous, he’ll end up in awe of Naruto. ^^
    Love the interrupting thoughts about the change in Naruto’s recognition of Sasuke. ____ If Naruto’s planning to visit Sasuke, he’s got guts. Whether he recognizes them or not, he’s got fluttery feelings about Sasuke, and even if he hadn’t, Sasuke’s kind of an irritable guy to ask for help at random. (By the way, what time is it? Is it supposed to be dark out, or is it still mid-afternoon?)
    I like this part: “Only his brother could tell somehow, even from across town, when he was in such a bad mood . . .” His brother might just have a rival, then. ^_^ ____ Hehehe, you’ll never be rid of him now, Sasuke. >D ____ Lol, “I don’t have all night.” This is cute. ____ What I find rather funny is all these moments they end up alone together, and yet neither one of them brings up the sex scene in chapter 1. It’s totally understandable, but it’s also kind of funny how nothing has happened since then. Even seeing Naruto naked in the shower didn’t break much between them. It’s just when they’re alone that they (might) indulge in anything. But otherwise they don’t say a word to each other on the subjects of sex/dating/romance/attraction/payback/feelings/blackmail/age/deals/whatever. It’s just a cloud hovering over them and making them both tense. I like it. No communication whatsoever. =) ____ D’awww, so CUTE, Sasuke holding out the pencil like that! ♥ ^_^
    Love how they’re both naturally comfortable in the same room (even though they shouldn’t be, judging from the way things are between them). ____ Whoopsie: “He couldn’t help but smile at the site.” Actually, it’s sight. ____ I like the detail about how the presence of Sasuke’s family creates tension. ____ Oh my. ♥
    I like how they both want to . . . to be with each other at the very least, and yet how they keep it quiet/hidden (or try to, anyway). ____ Interesting. Now that Sasuke’s aware that Naruto’s aware, he’s freaked out. Probably not used to opening up to other people.
    It’s ironic. Sasuke was helping Naruto with chemistry. And then after the little kiss: “He wasn’t quite sure what had come over him then, he’d just seen Naruto lying there, looking so peaceful, and he’d just leaned in on impulse, like it was someone else, or maybe some sort of a dream.” That feeling is also known as chemistry. And he’s not even recognizing it. Ironic, is it not? By the way, in that sentence . . . the part that says “like it was someone else” is a little misleading. It sounds like he was thinking of someone else instead of Naruto, and that’s the reason for the impulse. But I think you meant that it was like someone else was making him do it, or that he was someone else. Am I right? ____ Alright, the guilt is closing in on Sasuke, but didn’t he hear Naruto say “don’t stop” just a minute ago? ____ Heh—love the startling way Naruto starts to come on to him. But, uh, I was mislead again for a minute: “He kept his eyes shut tight, and let his body just be moved, his legs rearranged. They snapped open in reflex though when something heavy flopped forwards onto him . . .” For a moment I thought you meant his legs snapped open, not his eyes. ^^; ____ Mmmm, luuuv the way Naruto’s ravishing Sasuke. ♥ ____ Love the futile struggle, too. =) ____ My guess is Naruto’s thought when he jumped Sasuke was “Now or never, Naruto. Make your move, or forever lose your chance.” ____ Love the near-wordless communication between them. It’s mostly actions and body language. =) ____ Love how Naruto seduces him in this. This is fantastic! =D ____ The part where Naruto puts his fingers to Sasuke’s lips makes me wonder what Naruto’s up to. Who gets top, I wonder? ____ Love Sasuke’s perception of every little detail of what Naruto’s feeling. ____ Love how Sasuke can’t quite make up his mind about closing his eyes or keeping them open. ____ Very nice. The ending seemed a little abrupt to me. I mean, where do they go from there? But the lemon was nice. Actually, this chapter seemed more WAFFy than the previous one, in my opinion.
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  • From ANON - Anon on October 09, 2008
    Second Overture—WAFF: Love how uneasy Sasuke is. ____ And uncomfortable with his guilt. ____ Love that clarifying line: “It wasn’t that he wasn’t brave, or capable of taking care of himself, he just wasn’t that stupid.” ____ Whoops: “The rest of the ride past in tense silence,” you meant passed. Also you said, “move him head” instead of “move his head” (easy typo to make). And (jeez, I’m on a roll, aren’t I? Sorry about that. >.< . . ) “Naruto pointed the way every once and awhile.” Actually, it’s “once in awhile.” ____ I love all these things Sasuke’s feeling. The connection is stirring between them in the silence of the ride. =) ____ I like the mystery in it (even if it’s just a case of where-are-those-damn-keys). ^^ By the way, it’s “he threw the car into gear,” not “through the car into gear.” (Sorry for the hypersensitivity this time.) ____ Sasuke can’t simply say “What’s wrong?” can he? He had to make it sound rude. ____ Boy, Naruto must be feeling really down to keep up the antagonism (though it makes sense, considering the earlier blackmail and Sasuke’s current asshole-tivity). ____ Okay. At first I didn’t get the deal with the phone numbers and stuff. When Sasuke said, “Get in,” I figured he’d let Naruto stay at his house for a while. Then Naruto said, “My phone is bolted to my kitchen wall. Not all of us can afford fancy things, you know.” And Sasuke wrote his own number instead. My reaction while reading: No duh, Sasuke. Why ask him to put his own number if he’s not going to be at his house to answer it? I would’ve thought you’d’ve seen that, it’s an obvious point. . . . Unless . . . OH, WAIT. Did you mean his cell phone? THAT would make more sense. Oh, that is what he meant! That’s why Naruto said that line about “fancy things.” Okay, I got it. Alright. My point is, that the communication was too vague for the reader to understand (to me, anyway). If he had said, “Put your cell number on there, Naruto-kun, and get back in the car,” it would’ve made the whole thing a lot clearer. ____ Love Sasuke’s gruff attitude as he tries to help. ____ Is Naruto’s home life so bad as for him to be willing to risk Sasuke? I mean, Sasuke’s not exactly trustworthy. ____ “Nothing in his mind would ever say anything about how he felt himself coming to like the boy though. He chose not to think about that at all.” He must be trying really hard if nothing is turning up in his mind while he’s feeling such strong and obvious feelings. . . . Actually, that would make sense for his gruff and angry attitude. It’s easier to be in denial when you’re stewing about something. ____ Heh, nice touch: “Sasuke got more nervous as he neared the door.” =) ____ Awkward repetition: “Still, he wondered where he could find the boy now. Still, he passed through the hallway beyond quickly . . .” Needs some revision, just to get rid of one of those “still’s.”
    Understandable why Naruto feels uncomfortable. I’d be uncomfortable if I were in Sasuke’s house; the guy’s so tense. ____ “the japanese style showering room off to one side.” Need to capitalize the “j”.
    Lol, love Sasuke’s nervous reaction in the first paragraph. ^^ ____ “soft red sweatpants his brother had given him for christmas many years ago.” Capitalize the “c”. ____ (*snort*) Love the part when he wonders about why he’s doing this. The first two were one story, but then that bit about his own bathroom made me laugh. He’s got it bad, hasn’t he? XD And wouldn’t Naruto just love to see Sasuke in such a state. >D ____ Hot as the imagery is, Sasuke, I don’t think it’d be a good idea to molest Naruto right now. ^^; ____ Heh—love how the act of Naruto opening the door just halted all thoughts and previous possibilities. That was cool. ____ This is great seeing Sasuke so off-balance. =D
    Lol. “While it had already been established that the Uchiha found him at least slightly attractive . . .” That’s being modest; he finds Naruto downright sexy as hell! He found him worth blackmailing into a fuck, after all, didn’t he? >D ____ “even as he had objected it hadn’t been bad really, just unexpected and a little bit scary.” Hmm. That clears things up a little. I don’t quite understand it unless he had the hots for Sasuke before that incident. So . . . yeah, that makes a little more sense now. ____ “It was a bit weird, it smelled strangely like the Uchiha.” Why is that weird/strange? They are his clothes, after all; it makes total sense that they smell like him. ____ Oh! Love the surprising way you brought his brother into the picture. Totally unexpected. ^^ ____ “The younger Uchiha scowled and looked away, staring at the table in front of him so intently that Naruto thought it might just burst into flames.” And in another well-known universe, it probably did. ^^ ____ Love Naruto’s instant dislike of Itachi. ____ Ooh, “you bastard,” right off the bat. This should be good. ____ Nice touch: “and when he returned his mood was a bit better, but he looked exhausted.” That better mood would be “relief” and I like the exhausted feeling. I totally know how it feels to be around a family member that just the presence of them in the same room is exhausting. ____ Love Sasuke’s snappish response back to Naruto’s attempt to say goodbye, and then his backup line. It’s cute. =)
    “Sasuke was perfectly fine with that arrangement, just enjoying the petulant expression on the blond’s face . . .” Sadist. ____ I like the line about Sasuke not caring about others’ opinions but still liking to show off to them. =) ____ “He convinced himself it was just a teenage boy thing though . . .” That makes sense, since he’s a teacher. But what I don’t get is how earlier you described him as “the older boy.” If he’s a teacher, wouldn’t “boy” be too young a description for him? ____ Lol, nice touch about Sasuke owning a set of textbooks that Naruto uses. ____ “The Uchiha got a lot of work done too, more than he would have on a regular night, and that thought baffled him.” Baffles me too. Doesn’t seem to make much sense. õ.ô ____ HA! That’s why! He stayed up too late! XD ____ Awww, cute ending. I was just about to say “Where is that landlord??” when I saw the “4 missed calls.” They forgot. ^^

    (*Whew*) This took me days to write. o_o;;
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  • From ANON - Anon on October 03, 2008
    I never would’ve guessed more chapters would be added onto this. It was a bit of a wish, but I didn’t think it’d actually happen. Sweet surprise. =)

    (I review as I read.)

    First Overture—Angst: (Already I like how you call them “Re-education” and give them “overtures.” Clever. ^_^) ____ LOLs at the A/N! “I decided to ass it on to Education anyways.” XDDD

    At least Sasuke kept his word. I wonder what Naruto plans to do if not go to college. ____ I like the slight upside at the end of that section.
    Oh boy. Fate’s going to have them meet again, ain’t she? ^^ ____ So Naruto’s the only one in the room? Bummer. (Inner-Me: Oh goody! ♥__♥) ____ Yeah, rub it right in there, Sasuke. 9_9 ____ “Make the best of it?” Uh-oh. ____ Alright. The part where Naruto suddenly goes cold to Sasuke . . . I like the effect it had on Sasuke. But (‘scuse the criticism) the way Sasuke reacted was a little clichéd to me. I can picture Sasuke’s “heart sinking” and thinking something “with dismay,” though. And, while attention to the eyes is a fun detail, it’s beginning to be used a little too much in fanfiction, in my opinion. Naruto can easily show some negative feelings with other parts of his body as well in very subtle gestures or positioning or whatever. But I like the part that says Sasuke “felt the guilt like a stone, heavy inside of him.” He never felt it before, though? Never? ô.o
    Boy, the day just keeps getting better and better, don’t it. Poor guy. ____ Was that what Naruto was feeling when he saw Sasuke’s face at the time? Or did Naruto feel that way when he remembered it later? Though if the latter were the case, he’d definitely feel the hurt as well. Seems to me like the emotion he would’ve been feeling at the time would be harder to define. Or simpler. Whatever. ____ Who’s his guardian, I wonder. ____ This must be an off-day for Naruto. I can understand it, though. The silliest people have them too. ____ Not that brave? I’d think he’d be brave enough. Maybe his heart wouldn’t really be in it, though. Like maybe he didn’t really want to leave because of roots or something, despite how much he’d wish to go. ____ Might want to make a new paragraph at “He jumped a little when [. . .]” And you forgot the “e” in the second “he” I think. ____ I wonder what Sasuke was thinking, because Naruto had to’ve been oddly quiet throughout the whole detention. Sasuke’d probably have an idea as to why, but he probably feels concerned, too. At least, I hope he does.
    Initial sentence (here’s me nitpicking): I like Sasuke staring after Naruto for a bit, but what’s with the head-shaking? It sounds like he doesn’t really care. The gesture seemed too . . . dismissive to me. ____ Okay. Him ignoring Naruto and just working on stuff seems in character enough; it makes sense. But it doesn’t make much sense with his earlier reaction of guilt. The way the guilt was described, it sounded like something that would be a lot harder to dismiss the way Sasuke apparently had. I mean, wasn’t he just a little distracted while grading papers? Not hugely what-am-I-doing distracted, but just like glancing-up-every-now-and-then-‘Is-he-okay?’ kind of distracted. ____ (!) Sasuke doesn’t know that Naruto doesn’t have any parents? That’s interesting. ô_o ____ I like that line: “Such was the responsibility of the last one in the building.” ^_^ Neat. ____ Heh—he’s gonna see Naruto walking, isn’t he? ^^ ____ Interesting line: “a graduation gift from his asshole brother.” Shows a lot of gratitude, don’t it. ^^ ____ Violin? What’s he listen to, Vivaldi? ____ Hmm, and who’s the unwitting pedestrian, I wonder? ____ Yeesh. Sasuke’s . . . a total prick. That was rude. õ_õ; Oh wait—he’s angry at himself, too, apparently, and he doesn’t want to admit it. ____ Yep, knew it was Naruto. ^^ ____ “He found his body moving before the thought had even registered in his mind.” Isn’t he in a car, though? That’d be awkward.
    Smart, leaving the books back there. =) ____ Sasuke’s first words to Naruto . . . seemed a little elaborate for him, I think. õ.ô If he’s trying to be rude, he doesn’t have to go that far out of his way to do it, I think. ____ New paragraph at “Sasuke cocked his head to one side, and glared.” And also at “Naruto’s breath was coming unevenly now.” I like how the angst that welled up inside of him during the day is just breaking out now in this confrontation, and how he’s powerless to stop it. The way it’s described is really good, too. His body language and the things he’s doing seems natural to me—sudden uneven breath, clenched teeth, staring, tears just sliding out of his eyes, etc. And that phrase, “running it’s sharp talons through him over and over.” I love it (though I’d change “it’s” to “their” since more than one thing is bothering him). ____ Poor kid. ____ Whoa, on the sidewalk, no less. ô_o ____ Interesting ending. “Let the warmth wash over him.” It sounds like a good thing, but it’s said with such pessimism. I like it.
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  • From MichiyoInue on September 29, 2008
    Awww its over... it was so cute!
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  • From ANON - Anon on July 25, 2008
    (I review as I read.)

    Huh. That sentence is rather curious: “He was sure he was the last person in the building, well except for the man that laid behind this door.” Call me extra-sensitive, but he just pushed the door open; the only way someone could be behind the door would be if they’re hiding, and “laid behind this door” sounds like somebody’s hurt. . . . “Sasuke folded his hands in front of him, removing the thin wire-framed reading glasses he’d been wearing, setting them on the desk in front of him.” Okay, I’ve got a mixture of reactions about that. First of all, (*SQUEEEE~!*) Sasuke’s sexy as hell! X3 Okay, now that’s out of my system, I hate to say, though, that the sentence is a little awkward. It mentioned the hands folding before removing the glasses; kind of a contradictory movement to do unless he was nervous about something. Suggestion: I’d reverse that order, if I were you; it’ll make the actions move much more smoothly. ^_^ . . . . Now it’s Sasuke who’s not being very nice. He’s giving Naruto that shit-eating grin; it’s mean. . . . He’s going to bribe (or blackmail) him, isn’t he? . . . . “His outward expression not conveying any of the smug pandemonium ricocheting around in his head.” Maybe not pandemonium, but he’s definitely radiating “smug”. Naruto’s probably just not picking up on it. . . . (By the way, what class does Sasuke teach?) . . . . Interesting interaction between them: Sasuke lets his dick speak for itself, Naruto catches on, gets upset, then worried, “and finally resignation.” And all without either of them saying a word. That’s great. . . . Hang on, hang on a second: “Naruto bit his lip, eyes darting down to Sasuke’s crotch, unable to meet the boy’s dark eyes.” The BOY’S dark eyes. I thought Sasuke was a teacher? Wouldn’t he have to be an adult for that? Unless he’s a TA, but I get the feeling that he’s not because he apparently has the power to alter one’s grade considerably. Might want to think about that detail a little more. . . . Naruto could report Sasuke for all of this stuff, but he’s probably not thinking too clearly and maybe a little scared right now. . . . (*snort*) What a way to say that Naruto has a big mouth. 9_9 So, has Sasuke been “busy” with his fan club? . . . . Interesting, Sasuke’s not just sitting back as he enjoys it, he’s working a little too (to get Naruto’s blazer off). Hang on, who threw the blazer across the room? . . . . How on earth can Sasuke reach Naruto’s ass if Naruto’s head is buried in his groin while he (Sasuke) is sitting on a chair? I’m trying to picture it, and it seems pretty awkward. . . . If someone walks in on them, they’ll be in so much trouble. . . . “Sasuke’s mouth went dry at the sight, it was gorgeous.” I’ll bet. . . . Now it’s definitely blackmail. . . . Why do you keep calling him “boy”? Isn’t he a teacher? That’s too old to be a boy, darn it! . . . . You’re a good one for building anticipation, you know that? =) . . . . Man, Sasuke’s a tease. . . . The imagery in this is shiver-worthy (good shivers, if you ask me). . . . I know they’re supposed to be the only ones left in the building, but wouldn’t they take a precaution and close the door? I’m surprised they haven’t; they’ll get busted big-time if someone walks in on them. Like maybe a janitor or a security guard will make rounds or something. And if it’s a student come back for pranks, then they’ll both get blackmailed. I’m just saying they’re taking huge risks here. . . . Boy, that’s mean. Sasuke pushes Naruto into this situation, and then calls Naruto a whore for engaging in it. I know whores have sex for money (and probably to support themselves), but Sasuke’s the one who pushed Naruto into doing this. . . . Why’s Sasuke yanking on Naruto’s hair like this? Is he a sadist? . . . . Meeeeeaaaaannn. . . . Oh, and that makes it worse. He just made Naruto consent. This is what gets the lawyers and attorneys asking all those interesting questions in court (if what’s on TV is correct, that is; I wouldn’t know in real life). . . . Normally, I would say you can’t blame Sasuke for being sex incarnate, but in this you can, since he actually knows how to use it. And now he’s caught Naruto. . . . Ah, YES, thank you. You finally called Sasuke “the man” instead of “the boy.” ^_^ (*thumbs up*) . . . . Uh-oh. “thinking these noises were not meant for him.” I can see heartbreak on the horizon. õ_õ . . . . I like Naruto’s train of thought during the sex scene, by the way. . . . Nice effect of “building,” and “pressure,” etc. . . . “Though he shaped Naruto’s name inside of his head as he released.” Well, maybe not so much heartbreak. . . . (*snort*) He remembers NOW. Kind of moot now, I think. 9_9 . . . . Alright, love the aftereffects and Naruto’s thoughts during the comedown. It puts a lot into how he’s feeling, and the story doesn’t end right after the sex. =) . . . . I like Sasuke’s reaction as well. How he’s back to his usual self, and the difference between that and what he was like during sex. . . . Awwww, DAMN! Did it have to end there?? WHY couldn’t it have branched out into a longer story and ended happier?? And did Sasuke keep his end of the bargain and pass Naruto? Come onnnnn (*groans, holding head in hands*), I need morrrrrre. What were Naruto’s thoughts at graduation? What were Sasuke’s thoughts at Naruto’s graduation? Did they ever see each other again after this?

    Hell YES, this is going on my Rec List! I may have complained and whined and bitched a lot, but I enjoyed reading the story a lot. The lemon scene was awesome and hot as hell. I loved how it went on and on, and all that anticipation! I thought both guys were kind of OOC (for some reason or other), but it was the hot kind of OOC. While I don’t support this kind of thing in real life, it makes one hell of a hot story, especially when it’s written as well and beautifully as you did. It wasn’t too angsty, though the ending was kind of depressing (ARGH!).
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  • From minaaaaaaaa on October 02, 2007
    :( :( was going so well but the eeeennnnnddd!! *wails* so mean! (not sure if i mean you or sasuke hehe)
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  • From NaoAngel on October 02, 2007
    OMFG you're so good at writing lemons, that was hot, i totally adored it^^ Sasuke's jerk but thats why we love him XD great job.
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  • From crazychemgeek on October 01, 2007
    Oooooo - I just love horrible, manipulative Sasuke. What a great chapter, poor Naruto :(
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  • From darktoy on September 30, 2007
    I DEMAND A SEQUEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >.
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  • From PieldeLava on September 30, 2007
    Wow, that a hell of start. I hope you continue this. Until next time, take care, and god bless.
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  • From lexjamandme on September 30, 2007
    Wow... Sasuke's a bastard. Mean, perverted jerk. No warm snuggy feeling at the end of that one. I hope you'll do more though. I'm a sucker for happy endings and all. I mean, Sasuke can't be THAT bad... right??? :(
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  • From akume on September 30, 2007
    Awesome story. Will there be a sequel? I hope so.
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