Click Here!

  • 1

Reviews for A Bare Anomaly

By : JebusOfNazareth
  • From KingOfIdiots on September 16, 2008
    Excellent story. Excellent writer.

    Your style is dark, chaotic, and infinitely compelling. I opened this looking for something to slate my recently discovered Naru/Hina interests, and found quite a bit more then I expected. I enjoy reading your notes at the end of each chapter, more so originally intended I suspect, and find the way you speak to us, the readers, amusing to say the least. This is probably due to the fact that I too enjoy provoking thought, as well as poking fun to the people I know. But this isn't about me, so let's get to it shall we?

    Your writing is intelligent and opinionated, as I suspect you are, and your views show blatantly threw out this story. Characters are portrayed differently, and damnit if I don't love every second of it. Jirayah being rough and grumpy, as opposed to a somewhat loving, albeit perverted father figure seems to suit him. The change in Hinata is welcome as well, and I look forward to see how much she really has changed in the coming chapters. You portray Sasuke as I think he should be, evil. Kishimoto seems to place him closer to the middle, evil with just a dash of good, but you have placed him more firmly to the former, making him a more believable character. Kudos to you.

    Onward to the Critique!

    There are a few grammatical errors, but hell, it is to be expected as you are, as far as I am informed, human. Other than that I sometimes have trouble distinguishing who is talking. I know you don't like breaking for new paragraphs, but considering doing so when switching to a new speaker, it makes things easier for the reader. Other than that I have no complaints.

    Please continue, as I am sure you have already planned to. I am glad to know that in light of the fact that you are willing to accept feedback, both positive and negative; you are not dependant on it to drive you forward. We are readers, and other than a polite suggestion, we have no right to influence you on writing a story that is, for all intensive purposes, yours. We either enjoy what you write, or we don't read it. Simple as that. In any case best of luck to you as you write on.
    Report Review

  • From nimistar on May 02, 2007
    holy hell, you deserve a freaking medal. i love your writing style, deffinetally one of the best i have ever seen. you have an amazing way of getting into the characters head and telling us their thoughts, you must keep writing.
    Report Review

  • From BlazinAtsuma on April 11, 2007
    Well now Hinata,Sakura, and Kakashi are going to become a team by themselves. I like how everything is going but I didn't understand Kakashi and Jiraiya's conversation can you help me with that. Hope you keep up with your story and update soon please
    Report Review

  • From BlazinAtsuma on March 20, 2007
    Someone sles noticed a few bad time lines for taking up time to start training after surgery. I hope to hear from you and please e-mail me I wouldliketo hear youropinion on others especially Kakashi. I hope to see ur writings again???? JTB8834@aol.com
    Report Review

  • From adambloodraven on March 11, 2007
    Good chapter, looking forward to the next one.

    PS: The Yondaime father thing, don't count me as pissed. It is one of the most logical courses for a person to take as to just 'who' Naruto is.
    Report Review

  • From wharehouse on March 08, 2007
    Not a bad mock up of the story, I'm kinda curious how your going to develop your own themes from here, but I suppose thats all in your head already.

    Anyways let's see chapter 2 :P
    Report Review

  • 1
T.O.S. | Content Guidelines | DMCA Info | F.A.Q. | Facebook | Tumblr | Abuse | Support | Contact | Donate

Click Here!