Click Here!

Reviews for Of Demon Bondage

By : stalker1120
  • From ANON - Elric Maxwell on July 17, 2006
    I can't wait for the last chappie! Gaara and Neji and Naruto...yummy! EM
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Sas-uke on July 16, 2006
    S'all well and good, until one realizes the pairing doesn't involve Sasuke.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - akume on July 16, 2006
    Fabulous chapter. I especially loved the threesome. Ano, there will be other partners besides Gaara and Neji? I sure hope so. Anyway, thanks again and keep up the good job.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - STARR* on July 16, 2006
    Wow. This is a really neat fanfic. I'm completely blown away by how well done this is. I hope you get the next chapter out soon, and maybe a lemon too?
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Inui's bastard love child on June 25, 2006
    Okay... I've reviewed now quick you must write and post the next chapter soon.........
    I am finding this to be to great a story to even just leave here.
    Encore preformance is a must.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Inuchic13 on June 18, 2006
    This story is getting interesting. Yaoi-san, I can't wait until you post the next chapter. Oh and Inuzuka Tsume is Kiba-kun's okaa-san, Hana-san is his onee-chan.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Devious Lil Devil on June 10, 2006
    wow. this sounds promising. i look foward to your next update.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - losthimagain on June 06, 2006
    O.O Wow this is odd. I love it! Please update soon! *hopes this is a SasuNaru fic*
    Report Review

  • From ANON - akume on June 06, 2006
    Please oh please continue. I so want to know what happens next. Maa, so will there be a harem for Naruto-kun? I sure hope so.
    Report Review

  • From ANON - Elric Maxwell on June 06, 2006
    Man, I'm in deep on this one! I hope you update soon! I really like it! ^_^ EM
    Report Review

  • From ANON - death.by.shuriken (sorry... too lazy to log in.) on June 06, 2006
    Well, I just have to say that this is beautifully written. I like the First Person POV of Kyuubi, especially. I've read fics that run parallel to your story line but nothing that had this much of a unique twist to it. I really, really loved how you portrayed the Kyuubi. I commend you on it. The desperation, the pity and the guilt that she felt for putting Naruto through so much wrung my heart. Your grammar was wonderful, mechanics, everything was great which is refreshing when dealing with a genre (fan fiction in general) that is swamped with half-assed story writing and underaged fangirls/boys.

    But... (And this made me sad...)

    There were a few things that sort of killed it for me and all of it was in the KakaIru part. Although I understand that what you were doing was portraying an already established relationship, my mind instantly rejected the idea of Kakashi calling Iruka 'honey, Love, Darling..." what have you.

    But I'm digressing from the most important part of my critique. The cutesy antics of Kakashi and Iruka interrupted the flow of the story. I gather that this story isn't a KakaIru story. I understand that Kakashi and Iruka are an integral part of Naruto's life, as seen in the anime and manga... but what isn't important is their relationship with each other. The play fighting and the teasing clashed with the dark, deep moods that you had set with the Kyuubi part of the story.

    Another thing that I found completely unnecessary, and again this was in the KakaIru part of your story, the Japanese dialogue. Despite this being a fandom based around a Japanese Animation--- don't feel compelled to write in Japanese. This is a mood killer and destroys the dramatic feel that you have woven so beautifully in the first part of the story. I feel compelled to stress this point... your fic is written in English. Keep it that way. Although it's cute and might even further emphasize a bond between Kakashi and Iruka, it isn't necessary. Honorifics are probably the only excusable Japanese that should be used in fan fics.

    I hope that you don't take anything I have written to offense. I hope that you will take this as advice as I had meant it to be when I wrote it. I hope that you will take this into consideration when writing further fics. If you want to get a hold of me to either flame me or what have you, I've left my email. Unlike people who leave negative feedback, I'm not a coward to face up to anyone who has objections about my critisms.
    Report Review

T.O.S. | Content Guidelines | DMCA Info | F.A.Q. | Facebook | Tumblr | Abuse | Support | Contact | Donate

Click Here!