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Reviews for Don´t hide your feelings from me

By : Mizuka
  • From ANON - jamie on December 29, 2005
    plez updat
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  • From ANON - Ash-chan on December 23, 2005
    Hi there,

    Your story plot is WONDERFUL.. but I do suggest a beta. I'll even beta for you if you would like me to. So, since I decided to review, I should atleast give you some constructive critisicm. Your style of character thinking... messes up the story. You shouldn't require all those symbols to show the reader which character is thinking. Another thing I'd like to point out.. is.. you need more details. I'm really not sure how to explain to you how to show details... but, I'm willing to fix all the problems for you if you let me beta. I'm sure you'll improve your writing along the way. Believe me, I went from poor writing to excellence when I had a beta look over my story and tell me the things to work on. Well, keep up the good work... and if you want my offer, e-mail me at letsxplayxpretend@yahoo.com !

    Sincerely,

    Ash-chan
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  • From ANON - cibiboy on December 18, 2005
    Great start i hope the pairing is Sus and Naru update real soon ok
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  • From ANON - looli on November 23, 2005
    WHERE ARE YOU ?you sead "Next chapter will be soon. Maybe tomorrow" yet its been 2 days since i've last read that
    and you haven't updated tell now where are you ? and what is taking you so long? please please update soon pleaseT~T
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  • From Reyn on November 22, 2005
    hmm...Overall, you're a bit too repetitive. It's almost like reading something at the first grade level. But don't give up! Keep practicing and your skill is sure to improve ^_^
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  • From ANON - Yaoi Fan on November 20, 2005
    Please don't put in these:

    ‘‘Blah’’ -- Talking
    -Blah- -- Naruto Thinking
    *Blah* -- Sasuke Thinking
    [Blah] -- Thinking (Anyone else)

    The story's ruined becoz I lost my thought frustrated with all those. Please re do it again so that it won't be confusing. It's a shame because your story's got potential. This is not a flame becoz I hate flames. Just another fan helping writers make their work better that's all. Ganbatte ne!
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